Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems

Haunted Love * Prt 22 pg 44* - Page 34

MrMonster thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
whoa! update soon, i am not sure when i will, but don't make my lack effect you.

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Posted: 14 years ago
Updatee Soooooon,
Actually since you got GCSE, take your time x
Aha @ Zahra - I'm updating on SAT. Woot!
 
 
x
safeplacetoland thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
Really good!!
 
Plzz PM me when you update!!I love this story, GReAT job  and AMAZING imagination!!
Posted: 14 years ago
The next thing he did was...quite surprising, but now I know he didn't do it out of any feelings..he did it to annoy Prem! He went and hugged Prem, and Prem couldn't say or do anything but spit at him and growl.
 
Prem's brother kicks him, and turns towards us and smiles a very creepy smile, I still see that smile in my nightmares sometimes.

'OK, lets start again..I'm Prithick, Prem's brother, although I wish I wasn't related to him and vice versa.'

'To hell with you! I thought we were supposed to forget our relationship..BROTHER' Prem said spitting out the word brother with a look of disguist on his face.

They carried on having a full of hatred argument, and me Jay and Priya looked at each other - I mouthed 'sorry' to them, they nodded and we all let out tears for all the years we spent away from each other.

'Prem honey, (sarcasm) I swear I killed the girl you love with my own hands...' Prithick says slyly

Prem looks shocked and looks at me, 'You did?'

Prithick looks at me, and says, 'Well, well, you found yourself a look alike of your erm lover?'

He walks towards me, and forces my head towards him so that Im looking at him..his breath smelt like cigarettes and up close I could see he needed to shave and have a haircut, come to think of it he did look like Prem...alot!!

'Don't...you..dare..touch..her!' Prem lets out then adds 'Basta**'

Prithick lets go of me and barges towards Prem and punches him on the face ' Don't YOU dare calling me that!'

Prithick turns around and faces us and asks us to tell him our life story to him since we met Prem, as he threatened us all three of us told the story each of us adding bits in, while Prem tried to stop us, but we were too scared and told him the story.

'What a juicy story, I know just what to do to it to add the final twist...I'll tell you my own story, I am Prithick - Prem's older brother by five years, I was born out of marriage and my father ran away - whom I later killed by the way, and my mum married another man - Prem's dad, my mum would always care for both of us equally, but his dad - he wouldn't give a s*** about me, it hurt alot you know, when I was eighteen, instead of gaining the fortune of his and my mums money, I don't get anything! I found out that Prem would gain everything! EVERYTHING! He had much more than me at the age of 13 anyways! He had someone to love - Roya (then looks at me), he had money, he had top grades, he had everything a guy would want. So I decided to leave the house 'cos no one would give me what I wanted, I killed Roya and left. I went into drug dealing and all that - fun but I still had to do work to gain my money instead of having it all rolling out of my pockets, and today I was just here for another private meeting, but I guess I met you guys...so I'll have to add another final twist, to end it alll!'

Priya gasped, at that moment I knew that she still deep inside loved Prem.

Jay well his eyes just popped out.

Me - I looked down, tears forming, it was all my fault!

Prithick speaks to me 'Roya..so you love Jay and Jay loves you, I could do something here' He pulls out a gun and plays around with it, ' And you Priya..pretty girl but you love my brother...and brother I can just kill you straight..but I'll tell you what I'll do with your friends before you die - I will kill you, then I will take what you wanted and never got from you - Roya or whatever her name is, I will kill Priya as she would be heartbroken anyway after I killed you, and Jay I'll kill you to let Roya's look alike gain her heart back.'

Priya, me and Jay stayed quite. Prem looked at me and cried, the breakdown he had was just heartbreaking, 'Im not crying 'cos Im going to die..I'm crying because Vanessa has to stay her life with that monster who is related to me'

As soon as he finished, Pritick took the gun, steadied it, and fired. Priya let out the most horrible sound I had ever heard, she cried and wailed really loudly, tears just ran down my cheecks, and Jay - he didn't do anything, he was probably too shocked to let it register in his mind.

Prithick turned towards Priya and kissed her on the lips, while Priya scrunched her face up and he then said 'You'd like me to kill you right?'

Priya nodded. My mouth fell open. Jay snarled.

He said 'OK then!' and he shot her.

'What a waste..such a pretty girl..'

Jay was going redder and redder by the second, his fists were clenched tight.

Prithick looks at him and laughs ' Don't worry I won't let you be apart from your twin for long, and nor for your anger to burst.' Jay looks at me, as a way to say his bye, and Prithick shoots him.

Time just froze for me, Jay mouthed I love you and stands still - as his ropes around him wouldn't let him fall.

Prithick looks at me ' Im not so cold hearted, I need to let you suffer too as you made my brother suffer by not returning his feelings'

Prithick took me and drove me off somewhere, but I stopped caring about anything and everything. I lost the will to live....I also lost the capability of speaking.

As soon as I came out of being a robot, I decided to let the world know of my life story, I am now living alone in a flat, I'm 22 years old, and my life is without hope, love and life really.



-----------END------------------
MrMonster thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
twisted weird end, i know you didn't do it on purpose, school's a bore, seriously that was.. unexpected, more haste less speed, i should of never motivated you, Erm..  Don't hurry in your other story, take a year or two.