Toxic ~ Even if we can't be together in the end - Chapter 23 Up ! - Page 35

Posted: 5 years ago
Originally posted by SA19


It's quite awesome. The story is actually keeps your interest to the end. Characters are sassy but real also. Please update soon :)) 


Ofcourse ! How can my characters not be sassy. I love a good dose of humour in real life πŸ˜Š
Posted: 5 years ago
Originally posted by Tyshal


Well I'm disappointed...I hate waiting...I'm a restless soulπŸ˜†
But Koi ni...Thoda intzaar aur shi😳.

Just wanna wish u a very very much good luck!!!
You will do excellent in exam.😊


Thank you girl πŸ€—
Posted: 5 years ago
Originally posted by Chandana_Malik


loved it 

Thank you πŸ˜Š
Posted: 5 years ago

She might be built for seduction, but she was made for love


~ Jonny Ox





Aditya's POV


"Do you love me ?"



For a few seconds we looked silently into each other's eyes, and the distant and impossible suddenly became near, possible, and inevitable. It was as if a surplus of something so overflowed her being that it expressed herself beyond her will.I almost missed her whispered answer "You know I do"



Our gazes locked as the connection between us strengthened. The diamond pendant around her neck sparkled even as the clouds blotted the moonlight and bathe the room dark grey. She had never been so beautiful, so bewitching, so intense.



My heart collapsed, unable to untangle the maze of unsaid words between us. My skin begged for her touch. My lips tingled for hers. Every inch of my body craved for what only she could deliver.



Heat. Passion. An eruption that I felt in every cell. No matter how much we would deny, we were linked. Connected. Bound. Somehow, she had crept inside my barricaded heart. A barricade made by her and broken by her.



"I have a weakness for you. I can't -"



A low growl escaped my lips "A weakness ? You call our relationship a weakness ?"



She smiled but no mirth entered her gaze. If anything her golden eyes shone with sadness "The worst kind of weakness"



I cupped her cheek and electricity instantly sparked beneath my fingertips. Pinpricks of light, fire hell - all burnished beneath my hold. She swayed, pressing her face into my palm. I sucked in a breath, my fingers digging harder into her cheekbone.



Her rapid breath fluttered over my face, her eyes trained on my lips "I know what you are asking"



"What am I asking ?"



She smiled sadly "You want to know what happened to me in the past eight years. You want to know why I am the way I am. You want to find a reason to hate me. To forget me, forever"



I swallowed, closing the final distance between us and pressing her against the wall "Quiet"



The moonlight peeking through the curtains gave an unearthly glow to her face. Loose tendrils danced on her cheeks in rhythm with her quivering sealed lips. As much as she frustrated and confounded me, I couldn't help admire her perfection at hiding.



How could I understand and keep my bearings when the bloody woman had more personalities than a Picasso painting ? Sometimes strong. Sometimes naive. Smart, fearful, proud, gullible.



And above all evolving. And rapidly.



I should have stepped back but I didn't. Brushing her hair from her neck, words spilled from my mouth "Why couldn't I hate you for what you did to me? Why can't I stop myself from wanting you? Why I am still here ?" My fingers moved up her arm leaving goosebumps on their trail "Playing these games and believing that in the end our lives won't be the way you planned them to be eight years ago, but something entirely different ?"



I clenched my jaw "I am so messed up over you. I - "Her lips suddenly sealed over mine in a sweet feather light kiss, diving in as if she had all the right to be there. And she did. It was over before it even began but that single chaste kiss held more emotion than any heavy wet sessions I had ever indulged in.



Thick silence fell between us. Only ruffling of curtains broke the tension clouding with every breath.The chemistry and need to devour each other thickened with every heartbeat.



One beat.



Two beat.



Three.



We stood there, frozen in an invisible embrace, just waiting for the other to move. We swayed closer, drawn against our will to close the aching distance. I couldn't breathe. The moment stretched until it hummed with overwhelming possibilities. Then, it snapped.



Loudly.



Painfully.



Shattering under our feet.



"Zoya ! Zoya are you okay ?"



The monkey's voice cut through the emotions that had stuck us together like glue. She stared at me a minute, her eyes wide and guilty, her fingers resting on the lips I just tasted. With a soft moan, she closed her eyes, cutting me off completely.



"Zoya, zoya what's going on ?"



I waited a second, then another and another. But she never opened her eyes.



You must be thinking that why am I trying to make this work when all we do is fight. Well, I hate to break this to you, but when do two people always get along ? Adam and Eve had major communication problems and their sons clearly had friction as well. Fighting and failure is inevitable. What makes anyone think they can escape it?



I stepped up to the door and opened it wide, giving Shithead also known as Arjun, plenty of room as he walked in. If Zoya can't decide what she wants, I'll decide for her. Stick a fork in me, I am f**king done.



"She is fine. But, you better pack your bags and leave because the guy she loves hates your goddamn guts"



Did I just rhyme ? Might as well as hop skip and jump to complete the routine. And I don't even think about looking back as I walk out.



I storm off to my room, blowing off all mid route interruptions in the party. There is a reason I hate parties - inane conversations ... oops ... I meant small talk.



How am I doing today ? Believe me buddy you don't want to know.



When will Meridian expand in FMCG ? When I am damn well want it to !



I throw open the door of my room and ... see a beautiful saree clad woman sitting dead center on my bed. Like a goddamn queen.



"Whew, that was close. You almost had to act like a human"



And people ask where I get my sarcasm from.Genes. It's in my blood folks.



Mother dearest pats the bed besides her "Don't make that face. Sit down"



I close the door and loosen my tie "Ma, not now"



She glares "Sit"



I groan. "What ?"



I take off my coat and dump it on a chair. The determined look on her face tells me that I couldn't wriggle out of this conversation. I give in and sit down next to her.



"I raised you better than that"



"Why don't you grab your designs, or whatever you make, and pop up on stage ? There's a lot of money floating around this room. Maybe you could get a contract or two."



I rub the bridge of my nose "God don't start"



"Didn't you have to run all the way to Aloha because some big cheese sent you an email, I mean an order, to drag your sorry ass to pay your respects to me"



As much as I hate every fiber of Arjun Chief Mehta's soul, I admit I was really rude and obnoxious. He didn't deserve that. Not that I am gonna apologize or anything. I would cut my tongue before uttering the damned word starting with S.



"I won't start if you stop - with your childish antics"



"I am not being childish" I turn to face the typical parental disappointment etched on her face. My mouth opens to deliver a brilliant defense for my actions but ... I just don't have the energy to lie anymore. "I am sorry, I was just ... It was a long day"



She whispers "You hate him"



My voice raises in denial "No, I don't" She raises a perfectly shaped eyebrow and crosses her dainty arms. If feminine elegance was an art, Anjana Hooda was a masterpiece. I give in. " I'm just not necessarily excited about his existence"



She patiently waits for me to elaborate. I don't.



Does my lack of emotion bother you ? But how's this for an idea - stop defining me by what I lack. Instead, take a clear-eyed look at emotions, the unique ways in which I experience them, and their role in I am today. And let's concede one point straight off: I am not as emotionally articulate as you would like. It's not out of spite - I don't stubbornly refuse to spend hours talking about feelings. I just can't do it.



I have a sudden urge to lay my head on her lap and for once I don't overthink. "I have always been a bad son. Sorry Ma"



She runs her fingers through my hair and after the longest time I find - peace. Silence. Contentment.



My mind is sharp enough to realize that my life is undergoing a transition. Switching from work to love, from ambition to emotion, from power to intimacy. This transition is a big job and the ramifications are bigger than ever. So I need to handle it well. What if I don't ? Hey, no harm done. I'll simply join the legions of the angry and depressed, with half my money gone to my ex-wife, my kids mad at me, my few friends slowly drifting away, and a vague sense of shame that will keep me from making social connections. Do you like this picture ? Neither, do I.



"Being a mother means doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results" She kisses me my forehead  "Oddly enough, that is the definition of insanity. Coincidence, right ?"



I laugh "Yeah, coincidence"



"I should have loved myself with the love I gave her" I whisper my face buried in her saree.



The best thing ? I don't need to describe who I am talking about. She knows 'her'.



"You still love her" she declares.



Tell me about it.



I ask in a bland tone "Are you sure ?"



"I will confess one thing" she stares at her long, nude polished nails before looking back at me "After your relationship ended, I prayed that she was dead and rotting in hell"



I snort "You should have spoken up a bit. The almighty must not have heard you"



"Clearly" she sighed. "You were strong enough to move over but broken enough to look back" She pauses and stares at the tribal mural on the wall. "If you had really moved on you wouldn't react the way you do"



"I'm flattered you want to f**k me, control my life as well as save my career. Prove that I am actually the s**t who slept with her boss. Really, Aditya, that's lovely." 



A ravine of lost time existed between us. I sigh "It's been eight years Ma. Eight long years"



"You were good for some fun. Just not good enough to keep"



"Time heals nothing Adi. It just replaces memories. You replaced Zoya with work and random girls. She was your first and only serious relationship others were just ... passing"



"I wish I had never kissed you to make Amay jealous"



The cool chiffon rubs soothingly on my face. And I want to be a child again. How easy my life was. School. Cricket. Sleep. I loved to our backyard swing. I would kick my legs back and forth until I was soaring through the sky, looking over the wall and seeing far off into the horizon. Those were the days ... Now I see cut-throat competition, hate, envy and terror.



"Maybe she is just my obsession. Maybe she is right ... I couldn't get over the fact she dumped me"



"She is wrong. She reminds you of ... you. The version you wanted to be, not what you are. That's why you go back to her. That's why you can't leave her, even if you want to"



I  look at her shocked "I am your mother Adi. I know you better than your own self"



"I love you Aditya Hooda - there's only ever gonna be you"



I close my eyes. It had really been a long day. "I just want some rest"



"I got married. Then divorced.He was a great guy. Really you should have met him"



As our previous interactions flash through my mind, one thing stands out - Zoya was always overflowing with emotion. Anger, distrust, betrayal - it simmered in her eyes and shone on her face. Every damn time.



She didn't leave me because she didn't love me. There's no way. If she had ? If our relationship had meant nothing to her ? If I meant nothing ? She wouldn't be look at me like I was the goddamn devil. She wouldn't be affected at all. It's simple guy logic : If a woman is angry ? It means she cares. If you are in a relationship and the chick can't even be bothered to yell at you ? You're screwed. Indifference is a woman's kiss of death. It's equivalent of a man not interested in sex. In either case - it's over. You are done. It may seem like a twisted way to think but it's the way it is. Trust me, I know. I have spent my life screwing women I felt nothing for. If they f**ked another guy right after me ? Good for them. If they told me they never wanted to see me again ? Even better. You can't get blood from a stone. You can't get a reaction from someone who doesn't give a shit.



The fact that she still feels something for me - even if it is hatred - gives me hope. Because that I can work with.



She kisses my forehead before switching off the lights and leaving the room "If it is important to you, you will find a way"



Damn right, I will.



She was mine.



Mine.






Zoya's POV


I place the diya right next to the intricate rangoli design at the house entrance. I suck at art so I got a artistic sieve for making the beautiful pattern. With the crackers shattering the serenity of the night, the fairy lights and lanterns glowed, creating an aura of goodness and heaven.



Goodness.



Heaven.



I sighed.  

  


If I had known my life would change so drastically, I might have planned a little better. Strategized a little smarter, researched a little deeper. One moment I was Zoya Qureshi, the next I was a no-name Witness Protection Candidate Number P085678.



"You know I do"



I still don't know where this is going with Adi - I mean Aditya - and that scares me a little. Because Aditya Hooda is back in my life, in a way I never saw coming - winding his way around my heart. And it's a tragedy, like Romeo and Juliet, we already know how this ends. I know I am being reckless, even stupid. I am going out on that diving board, about to cannonball into the deep end of hurt and heartache. But an ever-growing part of me just doesn't care and that scares me even more. That part will take what she can get, for as long as she can, heartache be damned.



Did you think I was tough before ? Fooled you. Some of it was just bravado. A faade.



Dealing with Aditya Hooda is like swimming into one of those rogue waves at the beach. He's overwhelming. And either you kick hard to keep up, or he rolls over you and leaves you behind with a face full of sand. So I had to pretend to be a hard-ass.



I don't need to pretend anymore, because now I'm granite. Impenetrable, all the way through.


Ask anyone who's survived an earthquake at midnight, or a house fire that wipes out everything that matters. Unexpected devastation changes you. My life changed - unexpectedly and permanently - the day I aborted our baby and took a stand for strangers by hurting my loved ones.



"I love you Aditya Hooda - there's only ever gonna be you"



I mourn the old me. And my old life. The one that I had planned to share with Adi forever.



Suddenly my breath hitched. The feeling of being watched crept up my spine. I look up and my eyes meet his. I am surprised and I squint my eyes. Just to be sure. He smirks. And my surprise morphs into distaste. Like I just ate something rotten.



Everything about him spoke of trickery and seduction. He was silent yet I felt his requests. I hated his effortless power. At thirty, Aditya Hooda wore command like one would wear cologne. His strong jaw, pursed lips, and sculpted brow shouted power - true power. The fairy lights made his skin glow with a natural tan. His hands were concealed in pockets of his dark charcoal suit with a cream shirt open all the way to mid chest. A small smile graced his lips, onyx eyes flashing.



"What do you want Aditya ?"



With precision born of wealth and confidence, he pushed away from the wall and stood to his full height. He smiled and walked towards me.



Don't let him touch you.



I take a step back and stumble, the slight edge of porch catching in my flats. Aditya caught me, placing his large, cold hands on my waist. The temperature of his touch seeped through the cotton of my kurti, bringing with it awareness like icicles over an innocent dawn.



Aditya jerked me closer "World peace but since that is not happening, I will settle for talking to you"



Twitching in his hold, I searched for a way free but his hold only tightened. Blowing an annoyed huff, I plaster a smile on my face. "Anything the boss says"



He smirks "Anything ?"



Captive in his strong hold, I stare up to meet his amused eyes. I wasn't short for a woman but Aditya Hooda had at least half a foot on me. Where are six inch stilettos when you need them ?



He releases his hold and I take a step back. He continues, his tone suddenly serious "Sorry couldn't help myself"



He takes out a folded paper from his suit jacket and holds it out for me. I take the offered piece of document and squint to read the small print. My eyes widened as realization dawned.  "What do you mean ? What is this ?"



"Your freedom, Ms. Siddiqui"



My skin crawled at the use of my last name - fake last name.My mouth parted, amazement stealing my ability to say the incomprehensible phrases jumbled inside. Seriously ? What did he think of himself ?



He placed a delicate kiss on my jaw "Happy Diwali"



I waved the papers in front of me "What's the point of all this ?"



"There's a point to everything we do. If you've forgotten it, then you are blinded by self-pity"



A ball of fire rekindled in my belly "Self-pity ? You think I pity myself ?"



He shook his head "I don't think. I know" Tucking a stray strand behind my ear, he added with finality "You are a novice. You better become talented in the art of deception if you wish to survive me"



Without a backward glance, he left.






As promised I am back with an update in mid November.πŸ˜‰

Do leave in your comments and press the like button lovelies.😊



Edited by harsha.. - 5 years ago
Posted: 5 years ago
yay finally an update! loved it! hope zoya n adi soon find their way to each other! love their sizzling chemistry!
Posted: 5 years ago
loved the update. This is one of my favourite Adiya ffs. Please continue with it regardless of what the outcome of Bp is.. Edited by Missy-rc - 5 years ago
Posted: 5 years ago
😊

"You know i do"
i was waiting for the aftermath..you did give an amazing update as usual..And the title is perfect..

what's stopping them??the past,the guilt or the fear??

The moments in room were surreal,knowing how much they feel,knowing the extend of effect their decisions and actions can cause in each other's lives,still can't be open entirely,easily see through the masks for the world this pair made me want to bang my head on walls and at the same time made me want to hug them..

You know what's classy in Adi there?He clearly knows where Arjun stands in Zoya's life and hates the easy company he gave to her..He knew it that he's wrong to shout..But maintaining his image with a resolution to make things work out in his own ways make him so cool

A storm is on your way Zoya..Be prepared..She wanted to act that nothing affects her..poor woman..wanted justice for fellow people and lost her own in the process..Is it the guilt or the fear of threats keep her away?
want to see the interesting ways used by Adi to woo her back soon.. Edited by gprs - 5 years ago
Posted: 5 years ago
Thanks for pm as always 
Wow loved the long update.

So he has let zoya leave the job. What will she do now. Is he forgiving her I  some way or us he planning something else. So many questions. Plz update soon  again. 

Loved it so much. I miss your story. Thank you and updated soon if possible. What can I say the reader I me has to ask and as they say don't ask don't get 
Posted: 5 years ago
O girl!!
I'm really really glad that I waited for long for this!!πŸ‘πŸΌ

Just loved it!!

Update soon dear❀️
Posted: 5 years ago
Wow! I am blown away..you are so talented...the story hooked me in at chapter 1...can't wait for the next update!!! Kudos!!

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