Part-1
"Hello!Naina beta.Main Chachi bol rahi thi.Tum aur Sameer thoda ghar pe ana ek zarrori baat karni thi''. Bela Chachiji's voice had a sense of immediacy in it.
"Hum sham ko aajayenge.Aap chita mat karo. ''Naina said without giving a fore thought.
"Thik hai beta.Thoda jaldi aaoge to acha hoga''.Bela Chachi spoke and hung off.
"Sameeer!'' Naina trailed finding him talking to the newly arrived neighbour-cum-girl in their locality. The image of the 'neeli madhumakhi''still prominent in her mind and now this another ''madhu makhi' for her shehad' like Sameer.Ugh.
"Kya hua Naina?'' Sameer came inside and asked while pouring water in the glass.
"Kya baat kar rahe the uss madhumakhi se wo bhi itna has has ke?'' Naina asked cocking her eyebrows and crossing her arms.
"Bechari ko Chyawanprash chahiye thi.Thand lag gayi hai usko''. Sameer said and emptied the glass.
"Oho..usse Chyawanprash chahiye thi to dukan nahin jaa sakti thi.Tum kya shehad ho?Chyawanprash ke saath khane aa gayi? Kitni baar boli hun dur rehna aise ladkiyon se..Makhi kahin ke. ''Naina warned and Sameer smiled seeing his as always 'jealous Naina'' in action.
"Arey aisa mat bolo.Bahut achi ladki hai.''Sameer added fuel to the already burning fire.He was definitely enjoying this.
"Haan bahut achi ladki hai isliye mere pati pe line mar rahi hai.Kabhi namak,kabhi pani ka bill,kabhi cycle thik karane ke bahane..Doosri baar ane do use..aise Chyawanprash khilaungi ki ghar ka pata bhul jayegi.''Naina determined and stormed into the kitchen to brew for herself some hot cup of tea.
"Wow Naina tum to Doctor nikli.Matlab Chyawanprash khilakar yadas chura loge.Ab pata chal raha hai meri Naina to sach much ka 'topper'' hai.Han ek baar nahin thi list mein lekin chalta hai.'' Sameer spoke and ducked under the table as the ladle came flying by.
"Kya kar rahi ho?'' He asked as he went inside the kitchen seeing her tensed and worried.He instantly knew it was not for the 'makhi'' but for something else.
"Chai bana rahi hun.Tum piyoge?'' She asked as she put milk to boil.
"Haan bana do ek cup.Kuch hua hai kya?Batao na.'' He asked and urged as he took out the tea packets.
"Chachiji ka phone aya tha.Sham ko ghar bulayein hein.Thodi pareshan lag rahi thi.Sab thik to hoga na?'' She asked all apprehensive about the emergency call.
"Sab kuch thik hoga.Tum chinta mat karo.Acha ab yeh batao ghar mein Chyawanprash hai ya nahin''.Sameer asked knowing tricks to lighten up the situation.
"SAMEER!'' Naina pushed him playfully and smiled seeing his attempts and antics.
In the evening
"O bai! Naina! Tu bholuram ka khayal nahin rakhti kya?Kitne sukh gaya hai''.Taiji asked caressing Sameer's forehead as he touched her feet.
"Zameen thode hein sukh gaye hein.Chachi!'' Naina called Bela while Taiji made a face at Naina's comment.
"Taiji! Naina bahut achi khayal rakh rahi hai.Har subah Chyawanprash bhi khilati hai shehad ke saath.''Sameer said with a wink while Naina rolled her eyes and blushed into deep red.
"Haan ache se Chyawanprash khao aur Naina do chamach shehad dena uske saath.Baap ki tarah kanjoosi mat karna''.Taiji instructed while Naina nodded with a smile.
"Naina beta! Ander aana.''Bela Chachi called Naina inside.
"Kya hua Chachiji?Aap pareshan ho?''Naina asked while throwing a questioning glance to Preeti.
"Beta sun! Humein gaon mein ek puja karni thi.Tere liye mannat mangi thi.Waise puja to mujhe aur teri chachaji ko karni thi par unka zaroori kaam aa gaya hai.Ab agar puja bhi sahi waqt pe nahin kiya to pata nahin devi ki kounsa prakop iss ghar pe padega.Isliye main chahati hun ki tu aur Sameer jaake yeh pooja karlo.Tumhare saath Preeti jayegi kyunki Janki Mausi tujhe nahin dekhi hai itne saal mein.Pehchan nahin payegi.To Preeti jayegi to madad ho jaayegi.Train ke tickets ban gaye hein bas tum tino kal do pahar ko nikal jana.Samajh gayi na beta.Apne Taiji ko mat batana.'' Bela clarified while Naina understood the apprehensions of her mother like Chachi.
"Aap tension mat lo.Hum karlenge.Main Sameer se baat karti hun.''Naina said and got up while Preeti pulled her hand.
"Tu pagal ho gayi hai?Bahar Taiji apne Bholuram ke saath hai.Abhi baat karegi to Taiji ko pata chalega na''.Preeti said and Naina face palmed at her folly.
"Apna saaman pack karle beta.3-4 din ki baat hai.Bhagwan jhooth na bulaye saara pooja ho jaye thodi chain padegi mere dil ko''.Chachiji spoke as she handed over the bunch of keys of village house to Naina.
"Sameer! Tum kuch postcards pack karlo.Wahan pe telephone nahin hai.''Naina voiced while checking on the to-do-pack list for their week-long vacation in village.
"Naina! Wahan machhar honge kya? ''Sameer asked this question for 4th time to be precise greatly pissing oof Naina.
"Nahin gainda(rhinoceros) honge'' Naina threw the words as she searched for the keys.
"Ohh..gainda! To tumhara gaon Kaziranga mein hai.Matlab hum Assam jaa rahein hein.Wow.'' Sameer spoke excited since he didn't know for where the tickets have been booked.Preeti was handling all these and was accompanying her darling sister and brother-in-law.
"Nahin Assam nahin China jaa rahen hein.Shirt kahan hein tumhare?'' Naina asked all angry since Munna and Pandit didn't turn up to help her that morning as promised.
"Shirt to pehna hun.Isse utarna hai tumhe?'' Sameer asked playfully with a smirk.
"Nahin filhal abhi to mujhe do logon ki khal utarna hai.Aane do un dono ko''. Naina spoke as she dashed into the kitchen.
"Kya bana rahi ho?I mean kyun bana rahi ho kuch? Rashte mein kha lenge.'' Sameer suggested seeing Naina chopping the vegetables.
"Haan rashte mein khalenge five-star hotel mein.Main to bewakoof hoon,pagal hoon jo itna pareshan ho rahi hoon.'' Naina said as she searched the cabinets for the lighter.
"Wo to tum ho hi..Naya kuch batao''. Sameer rushed to his room as his words hit the target.
"Tumhe aaj chodungi nahin.''Naina voiced seeing him standing him near the wardrobe and giving his trademark smile.
"To pakad ke rakho.Koun mana kar raha hai. ''Sameer spoke winking at her and called her for a hug.
"Tum na bahut kharab ho.''Naina spoke as she hit him playfully on his chest engulfed in a hug.
"Sameer! Sameer!'' Munna and Pandit gave calls and darted to the bedroom not remembering that their Sameer was no more bachelor.
"Aye Ponga Pandit!Galat timing.''Munna darted back few steps seeing the couple sharing a hug.
"Tum dono!'' Sameer asked a bit shocked and embarrassed. Naina turned away and rushed to the kitchen not before throwing glares at her 'devars''.
"Bhabhi gussa hai kya?'' Pandit asked all worried.
"Apne bhabhi se pucho.Kya wada kiya tha aur kya kiya.''Sameer said brushing his hair while Munna and Pandit followed to kitchen.
"Wo bhabhi matlab Naina..thodi jyada der so gaye the.Uth nahin paaye subah subah.''Pandit clarified while Munna nodded.
"Boli thi tum dono ko ki jaldi so jana.Subah kitna kaam hai.Sameer ko to jaante ho.Upar se tum dono.Mujhe rasoi bhi karni hai na.Akele kitna kaam karungi?'' Naina asked pissed and went on with her cooking.
"Abhi sab kaam kardete hein.Bas batao kya karna hai.'' Munna asked all braced up to do the packing of even the house.
"Wo..table pe list rakhi hun dekh ke pack karlo.Maine jo pack kiya hai uske bajoo mein red pen se tick laga di hun baaki ka pack karlo''.Naina instructed while preparing two more cups of tea for her 'devars''.
Few hours later
"Jijaji! Aap 8 kilometer chal payenge?'' Preeti asked as they got down at the railway station.
"Chalna kyun hai? Hum car book kar lenge.''Sameer suggested while Preeti and Naina looked at him as if he had grown 'horns''.
"Sameer tum pagal hogaye ho?8 kilometer ke liye car book karenge?'' Naina spoke all bewildered.
"Saaman itna hai na.Isliye bol raha tha.Aur waise bhi dhup bahut hai.''Sameer tried convincing the sisters and knew that Preeti would easily agree.
"Jeejaji thik keh rahein hein Naina.Chalo to phir car book karte hein.''Preeti said getting a 'you are impossible'' look from Naina.
"Arey bhai sahib kya hua?''Sameer jerked from his nap feeling the sudden brakes applied.
"Wo..aage..'' The driver trailed and Sameer saw a herd of cows infront of the car.
"Naina!Dekho tumhare gaumata aa gayein hein swagat ke liye.Bhagao inko.''Sameer said while Naina made faces at him.
"Kyun?Wo sirf meri mata hein?Tumhare 'saas'' bhi hein.Ab jao aur ache 'jamai'' ki tarah unko respect do''.Naina retorted back and went for another round of nap.
"Haan haan jaa raha hun.Bhagwan kahan phasa diya? ''Sameer spoke and got out of the car.
"Gaumata ji! Aap mere 'saas'' hein na.Aap log Naina ki 'maa ' hein na.Ab aap humein rashta chod dijiye.Please.'' Sameer spoke folding his hands while Naina and Preeti giggled seeing the whole drama.
"Rashta chod dijiye na!''Sameer requested a cow only to receive his 'jaamai ki muhdikhai.''
Yes! The cow's tail gave a beautiful slap on his face for irritating her with nonsense.
"NAINA!'' Sameer shouted and sulked caressing his tender cheeks.
"Dekho tumhare maata ji ne mujhe kaise chanta maara.Ab kya galti ki maine?'' Sameer complained while Naina broke into fits of laughter seeing his condition.
"Jijaji! Jor se lagi hai kya?''Preeti asked controlling her laughter.She went away to call the cow herd boy.The boy whipped the cows and cleared the road.
"Bada ajeeb gaon hai.Ache se baat karo koi nahin sunta''.Sameer said surprised at the ''behaviour' of cows.
"Sahab ji pahunch gaye.''!The driver announced and Sameer looked at him in disbelief.
"Ghar kahan hai? ''He asked seeing the car stop near a tubewell.
"Jijaji!Yahin utarke ghar tak chalke jaana padega.Aage car jaane ke liye rashta nahin hai.'' Preeti explained while Sameer looked shocked with the geography of area.It was the first time he was actually seeing a village in truest terms.Earlier he had been to 'model-villages'' only.He put on his shades and carried his suitcase in swag.
"Arey!Naina!Preeti!Aa gaye tum dono.Bela ka chithi mili thi.Bahar koun hai?Tumhara driver?'' Janaki Mausi asked seeing Sameer not entering inside.
"Nahin nahin wo to Jijaji hein.''Preeti clarified while Janki stood stunned.
"Jamai ji ko bahar khada karke aa gaye?Aur unka aankh..''Janki Mausi's eyes had tears seeing Sameer's condition.
"Kya hua Mausi?'' Naina asked seeing Mausi crying.
"Anupama ne tere liye kitne sapne dekhe the.Woh to chali gayi..Tujhe koi aur nahin mili ki ek andhe se shaadi kar li.Kya kharabi hai tujh me bata..''Janki Mausi pulled Naina into a hug and cried while Sameer could not understand a thing.
"Koun andha Mausi?''Naina asked not understanding the point of crying.
"Humare jamai.Aankh mein kala motiya(glaucoma) hua hai na?''Janki Mausi asked as if she had just taken admission in MBBS degree but could not complete the course..
"KYAA?''Naina and Sameer asked while the other ladies too felt sad for Naina's fate.
"Itna acha shakal aur aankhein hi kharab''A lady spoke while Sameer asked Preeti to check his eyes.
"Aapko kaise pata ki inke aankhein kharab hai?'' Naina asked amused by the assumptions.Though Sameer used spectacles sometimes for reading purposes but his eyes were fit and fine.
"Yeh kala chasma to andhe hi pehnte hain na.Hum kya bewakoof hein?'' Another lay quipped and Naina facepalmed at the assumption.
"Mausi! Isse shades' kehte hein jo dhoop ke liye pehnte hein.'' Naina explained while the ladies seemed not much convinced.
"Kya Naina! Sheher wali ho to kuch bhi samjhaoge.Dhoop ke liye chhata hota hai..chasma koun lagata hai?''Another lady asked in a gruff.
"Naina! Your 'gaon'' is not my type''.Sameer spoke and left with Preeti to keep the baggage.
"Wah! Jamai ji angrezi bhi bolte hein.Matlab vilayat(foreign) mein padhe hein''.Janki Mausi quipped and took pride in her 'jamai.
"Haan wo bahut gyani hein.''Naina spoke not knowing what exactly to reply to ladies and Sameer who was already sulking.
"Jijaji!Pranam! ''Some young girls sang in chorus as they touched Sameer's feet while he sat on a khatiya.(cot)
"Han haan..Khush raho.Koun ho tum log?Shaadi mein to nahin dekha''.Sameer asked seeing the unrecognizable faces.
"Hum aapke door ,dooor ke saali yan hein.Shaadi mein humare maa bapu gaye the.Hum Preeti ke saheli hein.Naina to padhaku hai isliye gaon jyada nahin aati.''A girl who seemed to be their leader spoke.
"Acha acha.Ho gaya tum logon ka?Jao Naina ko bula lao.'' Sameer commanded while the girls shared a secret smile.The next moment Sameer's boots were gone.
"Arey kya kar rahe ho?''Mere joote! Sameer howled seeing the girls running away taking his boots.
"Shaadi mein joota churane ka kaam adha reh gaya tha.Ab pura kar rahen hein.Pure 2000 lagenge joote ke Jijaaji.''The girl leader uttered and stuck a tongue at Sameer greatly unsettling him.
"Sameer! Kya hua?Chilla kyun rahe ho?'' Naina asked hearing his shout.
"Puch rahi ho Kya hua'?Mere joote lekar bhag gaye hein.Ab kya pehne ke ghumunga?''Sameer asked making all puppy faces.
"To door ke saaliyan ne joota chura lia hai.Tum mere yeh chappal pehen ke kaam chala lo''.Naina advised while Sameer looked at her shocked.
"Tum sach mein pagal ho gayi ho.Main ladies chappal pehnke ghumunga?'' Sameer asked and face palmed at the idea.
"To mat pehno.Khali pair (feet) ghumo.Jab kuch chub jayega mere pass mat ana.''Naina warned.
"Thik hai ..Preeti ke pass chala jaunga.''Sameer returned the statement and Naina left with a huff.
In the Evening
"To jamai ji aap kya karte hein?'' Janki Mausi asked as she and other ladies congregated under the coconut trees at the sunset.
"Main CEO hoon''.Sameer informed while sipping the tea.
"Wo to aap PCO main kaam karte hein?''A lady asked.
"Nahin CEO hoon...matlab humara kapdo ka factory ka malik hun.''Sameer tried explaining.
"Tumhara kapdo ka factory hai?Humare liye blouse silwa doge muft mein? ''Another lady asked all excited while Sameer didn't know what to reply.
"Kaki! Kapdon ka factory matlab kapde bante hein phir wo kapda dukan mein aata hai aur phir aap darji ke pass silwate ho.Factory mein blouse silwate nahin hai''Naina explained seeing Sameer making goofy faces and all confused.
"Wo to aise bolo na.Waise kapda bech ke ghar chala lete ho? ''The lady again asked and Sameer concentrated on drinking tea.
"Bahut bada karobar hai.Ghar ache se chal jata hai.Aap fikr na karo.''Preeti quipped in between.
"To jamai ji..''Janaki Mausi's words trailed as a coconut crashed right near Sameer from the tree.
"Koun hai ped pe?Yeh kya badtameezi hai?''Sameer asked all annoyed.
"Sameer suno! ''Naina tried calming Sameer.
"Kya sunu Naina.Tumhe lag jaati to.''.He asked concerned and scanned her tip to toe checking if she was fine.
"Kisine giraya nahin..Wo aise girta hai ped se''.Naina explained.
"KYA?Bada khatarnak gaon hai.Tum yeh sab ped se door rehna.''Sameer spoke and got up to leave.He then realised he had to wear the ladies sandles since his door ke saaliyan are waiting for their 'nek''.
"Preeti!Naina ko bulao aur AC 'ON' kardo.''Sameer mumbled in half sleep after a heavy dinner.
"Jijaji aap so jaiye.Naina kapde dho rahi hai.Aur yahan pe AC nahin Fan se hi kaam chalana padega.'' Preeti informed and left.
"Pata nahin yahan log rehte kaise hein.''Sameer grumbled and went to sleep only to find some sting in his upper arm.
"Ab yeh kya hai?'' He got up and switched on the light.A long trail of ants were climbing over the bed's dowel.He realized that he was literally sleeping on a small and sophisticated ant hill.
"Ab yehi baaki tha''.He sat grumbled and not at all surprising him the lights went off.
(To be continued).
PS.:Thank you for reading😃.Would love to read all your feedback.😳
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