Posted: 07 May 2015 at 11:26am | IP Logged
The sweet song of lulling a baby to sleep...!! But is it only that, isn't it an expression of gentleness, of tenderness, of pure sheer love??? Or isn't it a way of keeping the chilling nightmares of sick reality at bay?? Or isn't it a way to soothe a bruised soul, a way to let tired and weary eyes that have seen shocking sights...rest!!
Or can be it something else...?? He struggles with his disappointments, his burden of guilt but more evidently with her pain, her shocked anguish, her shattered trust n self confidence, her numbness that builds a wall of silence around her heart!! And he can walk through the fires of hell happily but he cannot see her in pain...no ...never!! The turmeric milk...what a pretext, what an excuse to get to her...he hates the taste of it, but for her he can drink bucketfuls...anything for her!! The braveheart tries to show his courage and ends up making cute faces...which brings a rare, hesitant smile on her lips!! She knows he hates it, and she knows too that he is doing it for her!! So she gives in, sips a bit, bringing a smile of sheer relief on his face!! But he can't...he simply can't let her sip the bitterness of life, the poison of pain or the acrid taste of agony alone...if she suffers, he suffers too!! It's a simple basic fact of Manik's life now...if Nandini smiles, he smiles...if she cries, he sheds a tear and if she is pain...he is anguished beyond belief!! So, he might hate the bitter taste that life n times are offering him right now, but he won't let her drink it alone!! A sip for you my lady, and a sip for me...we share the sorrow!! All the while chattering nonsense, knowingly, he tries to lighten the moment, to keep the frowns and grief at bay..he fights the valiant lover!!
But his girl is no less of a fighter or a lover for that matter!! She drinks it all, in a gulp...finishes the whole glass of disgusting facts that life has filled her cup with...why??? Coz she does not want him to drink and suffer with her!! She wants to end his agony and discomfort...the acid of reality better burn her throat then touch his insides!! She spares her baby!!
Such a sweet lullaby of caring and concern..it spills out even in the smallest of gestures!!
He needs to go..mindful of her family...and more concerned for her!! She needs to sleep ...may be that will grant her some reprieve, some rest...she so needed to be at peace!! And Nandini doesn't want him to leave, lest the nightmares haunt her again!! She tells him with desperation...I can't sleep!! He sees the shadows in her eyes, the haunted look of fear and anxieties of terror!! She has been through an ordeal no woman would ever like to go through...and he knows n senses n sees her soul writhing and curling in her eyes...he reads her desperate plea!! His eyes cloud over but then ..he smiles!! Don't worry...Main Hoon Na!! He always will be,..forever!! He will be there for her whether she needs him or not, whether she seeks him or not...her faithful shadow...her eternal protector!! Yes, he failed this time to protect his shining star and God knows he will not forgive himself till his last breath...but he will always be there, right by her side!!
The Lullaby...his melodious voice floating over her wounds, soothing her bruises!! His gentle words, a salve to her wounds, his love...her healing!! He sings his heart out...the words..so perfect!! He makes the dark seem like velvette, as he goes around shutting of the intruding lights...and tucks her in like a baby!! As innocent, as delicate, as fragile and as loved as a baby!! But she won't rest, her anxious eyes following him, lest he leave her alone to fight with the demons of the dark!! He won't Nandini, your knight has no plans of leaving his damsel alone...ever!! She can't bear to take her eyes off him...his reassuring presence, his comforting sight...she is desperate for it!! She moves to the other end of her bed, so she can be closer to him...and how tenderly he puts her to sleep!!
Caressing her face, gently rubbing his fingers on her soft cheek!! His love enveloping her in a blanker of security, his adoration the safety she seeks!! She holds on to him, with her tiny hands...the gentle giant!! The one she never wants to let go...she had come so close to losing him...losing it all but now he was with her and she was just not going to let go!! She needed his strength, his reassurance, his confidence...he was here and it was going to be alright!! He crooned her to sleep...lulled her fears, her terrors, her tears away...finally soothing peace that only true love can give!
Manik watches her sleep, the sweetness of her face, the innocence of an angel marking her visage...his tender concern doesn't let him blink!! He could have spent his whole night just gazing at her tirelessly, relentlessly if the world had not intruded in the form of a caring Chachi!! Yes, she had his best interests at heart when she asked him to rest...but he couldn't!! He just couldn't leave her..he dare not!! It was death to him!! He couldn't walk away, not now when he feared for his love...he couldn't rest when she was so restless...he couldn't sleep when all her pain was awake!! He was on guard, her eternal sentinel...!! Exhausted he feel asleep at her door, only to be shocked out of his sleep by the harsh reality of what had happened...he had lost her...he had failed...she had disappeared...she had been hurt!! In his crazed madness, he rushes in ...she was fine...she was safe...and he breathes a sigh of relief!! His Nandini was not lost...his life was not over!!
He needs a lullaby too...to ally his worst fears, to keep his nightmares at bay, to keep his guilt away...he needs a soothing song from her lips!! But for now...its a looong night...of pain, and he knows he and his star will make it through...together!! As long as they are together..they can face and fight it all!! He waits n watches...her glorified watchman...once again keepin an eye on his most precious possession!!
But he gets his morning lullaby...as he opens his sleepy n exhausted n weary eyes!! Her face, her gentle small fingers on his face,in his hair...what bliss!! IT was sheer heaven...those soothing touches in the morn...what a start to a day!! She ..fresh and beautiful as a dewed flower, bending with concern over him...worried about his discomfort!! And all he could do was drink her in, and be thankful to God that he had not lost her!! Her mere sight gave him life...a mere touch n glance from her...refreshed his being!! He was mesmerized by her tresses, those silky curls...he was distracted...and instinctively reacted...the lover in him could not help appreciate her beauty...
Yes...a lot was amiss and he knew it!! Reading her face like a book...he knew the scars were a long time from healing...he knew she was not going to be fine overnight and said the truth!! I know you are not fine...but hang in there...you will be with time!! He is confident in his love...in her...!! And the girl...is the same that always manages to surprise the monster...I will be fine...but first the sick pyscho has to be reined in...he has to be taught a lesson...he has to be rendered harmless...justice has to be done...and that's our Nandini...the girl with a shining spirit...his guiding star!! He does not want her to suffer more, so tries to calm her down..but she won't have any of it...it was her fight and she was more than ready!!
Did it still hurt??? He asks tentatively...hesitant!! She knows he is obsessed with her pain, crazed with her bruises...she understands how they affect him...how a cut on her body, bleeds his heart to death...how a mark on her, scars him for life and so she does what she does best...take care of her monster!! She asks him to do the honors...such a gorgeous way to reassure...ask your man to dress you up...bejewel you...and he does it with so much pleasure ..so much tenderness...keeping an eye on her pain!! Yes, it might hurt her a bit...but it healed her monster a lot!! The first step...their together step...towards normalcy!! The earing is back in the delicate ear, the stars shine by her side, and his obsession is complete!! They both know its going to hurt, and the road ahead is not going to be easy...but he wants his Nandini back and his Nandini is determined to get back to her Monster!!
Edited by eveline - 07 May 2015 at 12:04pm