SWARON OS : LOST OR FOUND

I didn't change a lot I suppose... I just grew up and time changed along with the people around me... I just learnt to accept those changes... I just learnt to accept the reality...

As I clicked open the lock of my apartment and came inside after a tiring day at the shoots I found myself alone in the crowded city again...

Working as one of the lead girls in Indian television's one of the most loved youth show can bring you happiness as well as tiredness...  Right now I so want to be in his arms sharing the same of coffee in his apartment which is just a floor down to mine... But I guess I just wished for something too much... he is still in the set chatting with our friends...

He has been my best friend since I don't even remember how long... I just remember he was there with me when I went for my play school... he was there with me when I went to my senior school... he was there with me when I was in my college and now both of us has shifted to Mumbai and working in the same show opposite each other as a couple... yeah that's what people call us now... an onscreen couple' but what they are truly unaware is that we are committed...

The thought itself made me laugh... Committed... A term that changed everything in my life... I don't know how things changed so much that now probably it we can't rewind it... the thoughts itself gave me chills down my spine... May be by playing the character of shreya and thinking him to be rahul I completely forgot my own identity... along with his...

I closed my eyes and smiled at my fate... " I miss you... I miss you swayam... The old you..." I whispered when I knew there was no one to listen to me...

I didn't even realize when I had dozed off when I realized that my cell phone was ringing... His name was flashing on my screen...

"hello..." I smiled rubbing off my thoughts...

" Sharon... can you pls come down to my place for a while... I need to talk to you..." he sounded tensed... I knew he was feeling exactly what I was feeling... may it was time we faced reality...

"yeah..." I couldn't say anything else and moved out of my flat...

Within a second after I rang the bell of his flat he opened the door... was he really waiting for me at the door I chuckled in my mind... as I followed him inside the lounge he suddenly turned to look at me directly into my eyes...

"I need to confess something..." He said still not averting his gaze...

"I know that... tell me..." I knew something was coming up...

"umm... I don't know how to tell you... Umm..." He was looking everywhere other that at me... I had to speak up...

"swayam... You know you can tell me anything that you want right???" I asked him calmly and he barely nodded...

" Sharon...  I don't want to hurt you but I can be anything but dishonest with you..." he paused... I nodded urging him to say more...

"there's this girl... I don't know what is there between us but there is something... I feel something very special for her... something which I never felt ..." he looked guilty as he stopped ... He gulped his own saliva and continued... " for you..."

I smiled...

"its not that suddenly I have fallen in love with her or I have fallen out of love with you in that case... But I don't know what to do... I can be with you but then..." Before he could say anything more I spoke up...

" you don't need to be with me..." I said showing my relief as he looked up at me in shock...

"I don't think I would have said it today but I would surely have said it someday to you... Because even I can't be dishonest to you...i was feeling something has changed... For the good I suppose...because I also feel something special... very very special for someone else..." I paused as I felt his breathing has stopped... " who is not you..." I smiled softly at him...

"and because you said it first that's why I find it quite easier... I feel a lot lighter than before... I was so worried and guilty and was thinking hard about how to say this to you but now..." I sighed in relief... " I feel so good..." I gave him a genuine grin...

He looked too shocked to say anything... I could even see his eyes fill up as he has clenched both his hands into fists trying hard not to break down...

"so I'll just bring coffee... You chill..." I was about to turn when I found him trying to say something but I guess he was lost at his voice...

"sharon.. whaa... What... Are... you... you..." he breathed hard...

"why???? Maam has not given you the next part of the script??? Too bad..." I smirked... his face was worth seeing...

"so guys... you can come out now..." after a couple of seconds I found all of our friends coming out from his room with shocked expressions... Nilesh and simmi were the first one to speak...

"what the hell are you saying Sharon..." they asked me with fear written all over their faces... nilesh and simmi were our costars in the same show and now we are nest of friends... I saw ashish , and deepali maam standing behind them with a shocked expression too... they were from the technical team but we share a bond at a very personal level...

"kya maam ... aap iss stupid ko half script de diya mujhe ullu banana ke liye..." I laughed out seeing them in coma... I looked at swayam to find himself sitting on the sofa with his face resting on his palms... It didn't take me seconds to guess that he was crying...

"come on sab log... I know it was a prank... ab samajh aya prank back fire bhi ho sakta hai????" I chuckled and ashish gave me a hopeless smile...

"kya yaar...rula diya bechare ko..." he said...

"wow...ye accha hai.. tum log bhi mere saaath yehi karna chahte the na... I cry to kuch nahi... he is crying to he becomes a bechara..." all of us started laughing except swayam... I guess I should go to him...

I went behind where he was sitting and hugged him tight...

"kya itni jaldi peecha nahi chutega mujhse..." I kissed him softly on his ears... He stood up and immediately engulfed me into his embrace... I kept rubbing my hands on his back and through his hairs to calm his erotic breathing... I guess I scared him off too much...

"I am here swayam... I love you..." I whispered in his ears... He left me and cupped my cheeks...

"never... ever do this to me again..." He looked so serious at that time... I wiped his tears and nodded in a no...

As the night passed by all of us sat on the floor of the lounge sipping at our coffee when suddenly nil asked me all of a sudden...

"waise how did you catch that we were playing a prank..." I heard him say...

"simple...because my swayam is humanly incapable of loving someone other than me...and he can never cheat..." I said confidently as all of them went to their awwee mode... I kept sipping my coffee feeling his gaze on my face...

After all these years I didn't have to look at him to know that he is already looking at me...

ps: check note below