To me you are...
Not just my eldest brother but my father, my guru...my lord
Arjuna Uvacha : (Arjuna Speaks)
So much has been written and explored on this forum about my relationships with Draupadi, with Subhadra, with Abhimanyu...but the one I cherished the most was the one I had with my revered brother Yudhishthira. Though Maharishi Vyasa has hinted at a few places in his epic, no one has elaborated it so far. Here's just one instance from my recollections..
Maharishi Vyasa once paid us a visit when were in exile. After blessing us he asked brother Yudhishthira to accompany him and the two of them disappeared for a while. Which was not surprising. Their discussions on dharma would often be beyond our understanding.
It was nearly dusk by the time brother Yudhishthira returned. Nakula and I were engaged in a wresting bout under brother Bhima's watchful guidance. Draupadi and Sahadev were enjoying our bout, shouting out encouragements.
When brother Yudhishthira arrived, we stopped our match and following him to the river, performed our evening sandhyavandana. I could sense that he was lost in thought and unusually grave. It seemed as if an unpleasant task was thrust upon him.
On our way back to our huts, Yudhishthira walked back silently, while Bhima was still coaching Nakula on the finer points of grips in wrestling. I wanted to ask brother what was troubling him, but decided to wait until after dinner. All that wrestling had whetted my appetite and I was hungry.
By the time we reached, Draupadi had, as usual, laid out five banana leaves for our dinner. After brother Yudhishthira seated himself, we too sat down. Draupadi was about to pick up the pot to serve us when brother Yudhishthira cleared his throat and spoke up, "Krishnaa...Arjuna is not supposed to eat tonight. Remove his leaf". I looked at brother, stunned. What mistake had I committed that I was being deprived of food?
Yudhishthira once again indicated to Draupadi to remove my leaf. I could sense Draupadi hesitating, unwilling to obey. Rather than wait for her, I stood up and began to walk away. It was not yet nightfall. Maybe I could gather some fruits
"Arjuna..." came brother's voice from behind
"Yes, brother?" I turned towards him
"You are not to eat without my permission" brother commanded
Shocked even more and feeling slightly humiliated, I managed to find my voice. "Yes, brother" I replied
Avoiding everyone's gaze, I went a little distance away and sat leaning against a tree, puzzled at brother's order. I could only come to the conclusion that I had unwittingly committed some crime and brother was making me atone for it. Otherwise there was no reason why I was not being allowed to eat. Trying to ignore my rumbling stomach and with all the humility I could muster, I apologized to that unknown being whom I had offended.
Sitting there, I lost all track of time, till I sensed Draupadi behind me. I could see the anguish in her eyes and reaching out to her wiped her tears.
"Have you eaten Krishnaa?" I asked, knowing very well she would not have.
She shook her head, unable to control her tears.
"Brother has ordered me not to eat, not you. Why are you going hungry" I remonstrated with her.
Draupadi broke down. "What is this strange order of your eldest brother, aryaputra?"
I leaned against the tree and closed my eyes, "I don't know, Krishnaa"
"Then why don't you ask him, lord?" she replied
I turned to her in surprise "How can I question him, Krishnaa, being the younger brother? I can only obey him implicitly. He has the authority to order me and I will follow him. That's how I have been...since our father's death, Krishnaa"
It was already late night. I led her back to our huts. Knowing that she too had not eaten I made her sit down and fed her the last few morsels that were left in the pot. Naturally, she refused, tears still flowing from her eyes. She kept on refusing, till I threatened her with dire consequences of disobeying a husband. It was not easy, watching my wife eat while my own stomach competed for attention.
Draupadi brought me a large pitcher of water which I drank to quell the hunger pangs and finally I lay down to sleep, wondering at brother Yudhishthira's strange order and mentally apologizing for any mistake I may have committed.
to be continued...
Edited by varaali - 9 years ago