A tale of two relationships

Posted: 10 years ago
Of Paro & Varun, and their shared dreams of a future together and sweet child-like innocence.Of believing in the concept of falling in love, for hoping that this marriage will be forever.

Of Rudra & Laila, of fragrant nights, of shared beds & pillow, of the days after that they don't embrace together.


In normal circumstances, I should be more hopeful of the former & appreciate it more. But I cant.

Somehow at this stage I'm more comfortable with Rudra & Laila's relationship as a known enemy is far worse than an unknown friend. Somehow I just cannot get myself to believe in a relationship where the 2 adults know nothing of each other and yet decide to share the rest of their lives together.

But I understand this is the fate of so many young girls back home. I hope their child like belief in such marriages is upheld and their husbands give them the love & respect they deserve.
Edited by Naach_Basanti - 10 years ago
Posted: 10 years ago
Well said NB

Part of the arranged marriage is , you have to open up yourself in front of complete stranger to be judged.


Posted: 10 years ago
An arranged marriage is a gamble ... 
if you are lucky you hit the jackpot and get a good husband  😆
But God forbid ... he turns out to be a womaniser ... a drunkard ... 😲
You are in for trouble ... 
This one organised by Thakursa seems like an exchange of Paro for ammunition ... 
I too would definitely vouch for Rudra-Laila pair than Paro-Varun's ... 😆
Posted: 10 years ago
I agree.  It seems that the sweetness of Paro's and Varun's feelings are overshadowed by the fact that they have no history, and no knowledge of each other.  But at the moment he seems genuine and if he is, his loss will be even worse for Paro to deal with. Edited by vena.cava. - 10 years ago
Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by Kishmish


An arranged marriage is a gamble ... 
if you are lucky you hit the jackpot and get a good husband  😆
But God forbid ... he turns out to be a womaniser ... a drunkard ... 😲
You are in for trouble ... 
This one organised by Thakursa seems like an exchange of Paro for ammunition ... 
I too would definitely vouch for Rudra-Laila pair than Paro-Varun's ... 😆


But with a lot of arranged marriage these days, at least the boy & girls spend some time together in the form of a courtship period and are at least familiar with each other. But in the case of Paro & Varun its literally the case of taking the lamb to the slaughterhouse.
Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by vena.cava.


I agree.  It seems that the sweetness of Paro's and Varun's feelings are overshadowed by the fact that they have no history, and no knowledge of each other.  But at the moment he seems genuine and if he is, his loss will be even worse for Paro to deal with.


That's the thing. I just cant relate to it having known my husband all my life as a friend and having dated him before marrying him.

To me that is far worse and scary than the relationship Rudra and Laila have. Because at least with the later you know where you stand.
Posted: 10 years ago
My beliefs are similar to yours NB ...but seen some wonderful arranged marriages amongst my friends also ...so I guess its the way the dice rolls in one's life i guess ...and the fate that one has in store 😊
Posted: 10 years ago
I really have a great respect for those people who agree to have arranged marriage. Its really hard to believe how someone can say yes to a relationship where future can take any turn, but again is there any relationship with 100% of security?
 
But I have to chose between Paro' & Varun or Rudra and Laila, I will chose Rudra's and Laila's because there you know what future holds
Posted: 10 years ago
very apt parallel analogy , NB sa

on to serious wala fart.

Marriage is a gamble - period. 
Arranged or love - it doesn't matter. Happiness is not a guarantee in either case nor is one better than the other. 

How many times we hear of couples who live in a relationship for years, get married and the marriage crumbles faster than the melting snow caps

How many times we hear of couples who got in an arranged marriage and fell head over heels in love afterward.

The truth is, living with another person, sharing the rest of your life with them, sharing your deepest hopes fears dreams and a future is a big stakes game and you hope the other person is just as invested in the relationship as you are. 

Marriage changes the level of commitment even for relationships that have been lived-in for years. There is a certain accountability and permanence that can change the basic dynamics of that relationship. The best of lived-in relationships can crumble under the pressure. 

Marriage is not for everyone, and everyone should not embark on it unless you are sure of making it work. Its better to be in a live-in and be happy than marry and make a muck of it for all. Ok, these are not conventional views nor are they acceptable in most societies - so its not practical or in many cases advisable to tell people to seek love first. 

I don't think we can declare with finality one form is better than the other, because happiness comes in many shapes and forms and what makes me happy may make others miserable. very subjective.
Edited by serialjunkie - 10 years ago
Posted: 10 years ago
Well said...👏...one of my friend used to say that arranged marriage is a gamble, if you are lucky you will get a good husband...I remembered her words while watching today's episode...felt very bad for Paro...she is so innocent, looking forward for a new phase of her life with lot of hope not knowing who the other person...Rudra-Laila are in a better place in their relationship...they know what they want from each other...Edited by yoga123 - 10 years ago

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