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Arhi SS:What you will(retold) (Page 35)

Arshi.Sugi.IPK IF-Stunnerz
Arshi.Sugi.IPK
Arshi.Sugi.IPK

Joined: 17 January 2012
Posts: 37429

Posted: 17 January 2014 at 8:15am | IP Logged
Superb ending...Epilogue plz Smile

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mklam

Kishmish IF-Rockerz
Kishmish
Kishmish

Joined: 08 February 2012
Posts: 5325

Posted: 17 January 2014 at 8:56pm | IP Logged
Finally everything gets sorted out ... Shyam the slimy is behind bars ... 
Arnav is hugely relieved on discovering that Khushi is actually a woman ... LOL
Loved the whole adaptation of Twelfth Night and IPK together ... 
It was a riot ...  Star

Thanks ... hope to read more of your work ... 

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mklam

shalini_s IF-Sizzlerz
shalini_s
shalini_s

Joined: 05 November 2009
Posts: 18949

Posted: 17 January 2014 at 9:13pm | IP Logged
hope you had linked Aman and Anjali as well.. loved the ending..

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mklam

Juggaadd Senior Member
Juggaadd
Juggaadd

Joined: 08 April 2013
Posts: 805

Posted: 17 January 2014 at 10:54pm | IP Logged
Wow! That was one hell of a ride!LOL
I loved your story. Please do continue writing.

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mklam

pmpm1 Goldie
pmpm1
pmpm1

Joined: 04 March 2008
Posts: 1053

Posted: 19 January 2014 at 3:53pm | IP Logged
Awesome! And very different as well

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mklam

dreamymaya Goldie
dreamymaya
dreamymaya

Joined: 04 March 2012
Posts: 2138

Posted: 20 January 2014 at 3:59am | IP Logged

Sorry Mklam, I am bit late here...You completed this one too?? Amazing!!


The story has started off beautiful inspite of the storm. You painted the storm beautifully, for a moment I was transported to the storm. But next moment you created a serene atmosphere with the mention of Raizada home with diyas. Lovely pic.

The storm  also reminded me of 3 idiots scene - when the 3 guys were dismissed and they treading through the rain clogged streets. Well, the digs at Delhi city, I agree whole heartedly. 'Besides one could never be too sure in this city with the media reporting on horrific crimes on a daily basis.'

'Besides one could never be too careful in this city as television serials often depicted reality.'

Manorama was wonderful as Mami Bond and Devayaniji is right she did curtail Manorama's freedom else we could have a great actress! He he..The partiality towards Lucknow was neatly done...and I loved that hug..

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mklam

dreamymaya Goldie
dreamymaya
dreamymaya

Joined: 04 March 2012
Posts: 2138

Posted: 20 January 2014 at 4:28am | IP Logged

"O world! How apt the poor are to be proud."

 

With the opening line, you made me long for my blanket. Khush is really smart in collecting the information from the right source. Once again I am made to believe that you have something against Anjali ---

 Anjali Raizada was a person who always had a soft corner for dogs, strays and all those hapless beings thrown at the mercy of fate. She also had a stubborn streak in her when it came to playing Good Samaritan. So far her acts of mercy were confined to four-legged creatures but now she took one look at the young lad in front of her and decided that this one needed her support.

 

Mami was as usual funny and cutting sharp remarks. But good that we have Nani. It was endearing to hear Khush call Naniji. There was a warmth in that as well in that lovely song you mentioned...Pholon ka taaron ka...sigh!

 Btw, that was a lovely introduction to Payal..I liked her bonding with Khush

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mklam

dreamymaya Goldie
dreamymaya
dreamymaya

Joined: 04 March 2012
Posts: 2138

Posted: 20 January 2014 at 6:15am | IP Logged

"Is it a world to hide virtues in?"

 

animal magnetism---wow! That's a new phrase for me which I am sure I would be using liberally from now on..

 

'Hmm..so this is what it feels like to stand on the edge of a precipice and then being yanked back to solid ground' ---- that was a wonderful metaphor used to describe the suspense and tension!

 

Lavanya with her dimples and lovely smile is always a soothing balm and to see her in a lime green saree was a pleasure..

 

vitriolic spiel --- informative and nice phrasing it with the story. Khush is perspective in finding the hidden link of Arnav-Lavanya relationship. Atleast she has a clue  I loved how all the members felt about the food, each person's thoughts were interesting to read..

 

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mklam

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