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People love me because I am Aamir's wife, says Kiran Rao
Kiran and Azad with Aamir Khan
Director Kiran Rao talks about stories close to her heart, son Azad, and why she doesn't mind being labelled a 'superstar wife'
After spending a blissful year of motherhood (herson Azad was born in December 2011), Kiran Rao decided to get back to work in a new role: that of a presenter of Ship of Theseus, directed byindependent filmmaker Anand Gandhi. "The cause of promoting good cinema was good enough to get me out of home, though the guilt of leaving Azad behind doesn't leave me," says Rao. Effusive in her praise of progressive filmmakers, who are bold enough to break Bollywood stereotypes, she sits with her cup of chai on a rainy evening for a tete-a-tete on life, love, motherhood and her passion - movies.
Do you naturally veer towards films that have small stories converging to present a large idea?
(Smiles) In this case, it's a sheer co-incidence. But possibly, yes, I'm interested in films in which different threads come together (her debut as a filmmaker, Dhobi Ghat, and Ship of Theseus both have subplots). It makes for rich storytelling. There's more layering in such stories. It makes you think. That's why these kinds of stories appeal to me. But having said that, it's not a prerequisite for me to like a film. Because in the end, such films have to be weaved together in a holistic way for them to finally connect with people.
What gets you interested in a project?
It's a question I ask myself all the time. I often gravitate towards certain material, ideas, issues not knowing why. It's inexplicable really. I suppose I go by my instincts. It's my only guiding light. As I ask myself the same question, the answer slowly unravels and reveals itself to me. But I cannot pinpoint one reason or one thing that gets me interested. It's the journey to find that answer that fascinates me.
Women play various roles in their lives, those of a mother, daughter, wife, professional. Which role do you find most challenging?
The most challenging role is in finding that little space that you call the 'self '. It's not really a role, it is YOU and that's the one most difficult to attend to... that part where you are obliged to yourself. Often, this self gets least priority in our lives because our children are important, our husbands are important, our work is important... but that little you needs to be nourished and nurtured. Otherwise, no role will satisfy us.
Do you think it's important for women to write and direct more to get past the Bollywood cliches?
Yes. It's very important that more women start to write stories. They bring in a very unique perspective to storytelling through their individual experiences. And that is enriching for cinema, to have that insight that a woman can bring. Hopefully, with time, good ideas can challenge the cliches that put women in small holes. And it's not just films. I strongly believe women can bring about change by participation in all walks of life.
Elaborate...
There have been attempts to reduce the scope of women to enter mainstream conversation in any field. Unless we consider ourselves equals and don't shy from repeating it, the woman's cause will be reduced to a quiet conversation that takes place within closed doors.
Who's the hands-on parent, you or Aamir?
Oh me (laughs). Just me.
What's an ideal day at home like?
An ideal day would be to to wake up and see Azad by my side. There's something incredibly beautiful about the first rays of the sun. I love the morning energy. Ideally, I'd love to get a little time to exercise. Of late, I've been working out. I go to the gym. In the old days, I used to run. Then I'd love a good breakfast, read a book through the day, lounge. I love reading fiction - literary, science or fantasy. I also love long-form essays, and hunt for publications that have kept the tradition of longform journalism alive. To take Azad to the park in the evening would be ideal. Then watch a movie and have a nice, quiet dinner with my husband.
How would you define love?
It's not definable. It's a state of being. We all experience love in different degrees. In some people, love manifests itself more, and in some, less.
Since you describe yourself as a gypsy and travel a lot, what's your next destination?
I'd love to see the North-east. All Seven Sisters. I love mountains. And travelling to the North-east has been a long-cherished dream.
Do you mind being labelled a 'superstar wife'?
Not really. It doesn't affect me. It's an epithet I've carried for a while. I feel it's just an easy reference point because I am a superstar wife, you know. It's a fact. Of course, there is more to me as there's more to everyone than just a label that one attaches to him or her. But people have showered so much love on me because I'm Aamir's wife. The audience that loves him, also loves me. I'm so proud to be sharing his life that it would be arrogant to be bothered about the label that comes with it.
What next?
I'm clearing a little space in my head for an idea that's cooking, but it needs to be chiselled. Once my present commitments are fulfilled, I'll go to our home in Panchgani and soak myself in the peaceful atmosphere. It helps me think clearly.
After spending a blissful year of motherhood (herson Azad was born in December 2011), Kiran Rao decided to get back to work in a new role: that of a presenter of Ship of Theseus, directed byindependent filmmaker Anand Gandhi. "The cause of promoting good cinema was good enough to get me out of home, though the guilt of leaving Azad behind doesn't leave me," says Rao. Effusive in her praise of progressive filmmakers, who are bold enough to break Bollywood stereotypes, she sits with her cup of chai on a rainy evening for a tete-a-tete on life, love, motherhood and her passion - movies.
Do you naturally veer towards films that have small stories converging to present a large idea?
(Smiles) In this case, it's a sheer co-incidence. But possibly, yes, I'm interested in films in which different threads come together (her debut as a filmmaker, Dhobi Ghat, and Ship of Theseus both have subplots). It makes for rich storytelling. There's more layering in such stories. It makes you think. That's why these kinds of stories appeal to me. But having said that, it's not a prerequisite for me to like a film. Because in the end, such films have to be weaved together in a holistic way for them to finally connect with people.
What gets you interested in a project?
It's a question I ask myself all the time. I often gravitate towards certain material, ideas, issues not knowing why. It's inexplicable really. I suppose I go by my instincts. It's my only guiding light. As I ask myself the same question, the answer slowly unravels and reveals itself to me. But I cannot pinpoint one reason or one thing that gets me interested. It's the journey to find that answer that fascinates me.
Women play various roles in their lives, those of a mother, daughter, wife, professional. Which role do you find most challenging?
The most challenging role is in finding that little space that you call the 'self '. It's not really a role, it is YOU and that's the one most difficult to attend to... that part where you are obliged to yourself. Often, this self gets least priority in our lives because our children are important, our husbands are important, our work is important... but that little you needs to be nourished and nurtured. Otherwise, no role will satisfy us.
Do you think it's important for women to write and direct more to get past the Bollywood cliches?
Yes. It's very important that more women start to write stories. They bring in a very unique perspective to storytelling through their individual experiences. And that is enriching for cinema, to have that insight that a woman can bring. Hopefully, with time, good ideas can challenge the cliches that put women in small holes. And it's not just films. I strongly believe women can bring about change by participation in all walks of life.
Elaborate...
There have been attempts to reduce the scope of women to enter mainstream conversation in any field. Unless we consider ourselves equals and don't shy from repeating it, the woman's cause will be reduced to a quiet conversation that takes place within closed doors.
Who's the hands-on parent, you or Aamir?
Oh me (laughs). Just me.
What's an ideal day at home like?
An ideal day would be to to wake up and see Azad by my side. There's something incredibly beautiful about the first rays of the sun. I love the morning energy. Ideally, I'd love to get a little time to exercise. Of late, I've been working out. I go to the gym. In the old days, I used to run. Then I'd love a good breakfast, read a book through the day, lounge. I love reading fiction - literary, science or fantasy. I also love long-form essays, and hunt for publications that have kept the tradition of longform journalism alive. To take Azad to the park in the evening would be ideal. Then watch a movie and have a nice, quiet dinner with my husband.
How would you define love?
It's not definable. It's a state of being. We all experience love in different degrees. In some people, love manifests itself more, and in some, less.
Since you describe yourself as a gypsy and travel a lot, what's your next destination?
I'd love to see the North-east. All Seven Sisters. I love mountains. And travelling to the North-east has been a long-cherished dream.
Do you mind being labelled a 'superstar wife'?
Not really. It doesn't affect me. It's an epithet I've carried for a while. I feel it's just an easy reference point because I am a superstar wife, you know. It's a fact. Of course, there is more to me as there's more to everyone than just a label that one attaches to him or her. But people have showered so much love on me because I'm Aamir's wife. The audience that loves him, also loves me. I'm so proud to be sharing his life that it would be arrogant to be bothered about the label that comes with it.
What next?
I'm clearing a little space in my head for an idea that's cooking, but it needs to be chiselled. Once my present commitments are fulfilled, I'll go to our home in Panchgani and soak myself in the peaceful atmosphere. It helps me think clearly.
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