discussion lost - Page 2

Posted: 12 years ago
Both Manav and Archana have done a lot for each other ..True , they have hurt each other as well ( unintentionaly most of the times  ...) but they still love each other and wanted to be together depite of all their differences ..
They both are foolish but good people .
 
Others have created problems between them ..Also  the story line is very bad and unrealistic because no two people who are supposedto be this much in love can stay away from each other for this long ..Makes no sense ..
Edited by Tanyaz - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Hello.
I dont think that Archana is the sole reason for things to go bad in their marriage. The number of times she supported Manav seem to be forgotten ( even in that girl(?)'s case).  It was manav who insisted that Sulo stay with them ( Archana was criticized then for not telling hubby dear). It was Manav who insisted on buying the K-house even Sulo was telling him not to. Sulo was feeling bad about losing the house but never asked Manav to buy it for her on her own. Why blame Archana alone for these decisions of Manav, Yes she went along with him. he wanted to give away Soham to keep Sachu happy, thats ok? Archana has also made many mistakes and so has manav. If Archana  wrongly trusted psycho Varsha  then manav also wrongly trusted his manipulative mom ( who was dreaming of getting him married to Shravani even after manipulating her during the Sachu fiasco)
So both made mistakes. Both trusted others more than each other. And have lost a marriage.Period.
So I dont think only Archana is the culprit here. She is a sad woman but glad that she is not holding grudges.
Posted: 12 years ago
I don't understand how Sachin's death is Archu's fault? Archu didn't make the complaint she was even unware of it furthermore it was Sachin who was drunk when the accident happened...Sorry but that was his own fault you just don't drink  whenever something goes wrong...And if we are blaming archana's family faults on her then let us also blame Saviita's evil doings on Manav

And if Archana is manipulative and scheming i don't know what we shall call the greatest mother on earth Savita's actions?
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by bhallarox


Hi Topic Opener😊

I respect your opinion but I disagree completely. In my opinion, Archu is not naive at all, but she is very scheming and manipulative. She uses her crying tactics on Manav to get what she wants but inside she is not innocent at all.

I agree, Archu may have been a respectful daughter in law in the beginning but it changed very quickly. Once Savita started being nice to Archana, Archana began to take advantage of her and Manav's goodness by bringing in her mother and Varsha in her home without Savita's approval, and she knew her obsession for Soham as well. Manav has definitely lost a lot more from Archana then gained, he lost his son Soham only due to Archana, he lost Sachin (his little brother) only because of Archana.

When did Archu help Vandu? Vandu was very wrong to tell off her brother the day he dragged Archu over to apologize for not giving the check, Manav did 100% right to drag her and apologize to Vandu for giving the money to her selfish sister Varsha. And poor Vandu had gotten beaten up by her husband only due to that one mistake she did by defending Archu against Manav.

Sulo too is wrong to take Manav for granted. He brought her in his home from the ashram and got her the K home back. Sulo takes favors and then mistreats Manav, Savita on the other hand mistreats Archu but doesn't take favors from her.

I think Manav did good by going to Canada with his children. Archu still is not repenting for giving away Soham to Varsha, she should never even see her daughters again. One day she called Manav a business tycoon and next day she goes to her bedroom looking at photos trying to play victim, inside she really is manipulative and scheming, much more clever then Savita, Manjusha and Rasika.

Again, I hope I didn't offend anyone's POV by stating my honest opinion😊
 
 
 
Hi Bhalla,
You shouldn't apologise for expressing your opinions when you're not personally attacking anyone or being rude to anyone.
 
However, I must disagree with you on some points.
To me, Archana isn't scheming and manipulative, because she has never sought to wilfully hurt or harm anyone. Unilke Dharmesh, Rasika, Manu, Ajit, and Savita,...Archana has never wilfully sought to hurt anyone for personal gain. Dharmesh is the biggest culprit when it comes to being scheming and manipulative. To the end, he has schemed against Manav for no reason whatsoever, with the intention of physically harming him at times, and even wanting to cause his death.
 
I don't think Archana took advantage of Savita re Varsha and Sulochana. Manav was the person who first invited Varsha to stay without even telling Archana, much less telling Savita! I agree that Archana had no right ot invite Sulochana to stay at the D's house without first asking Savita, but I don't think that taking advantage of her. I think it was a case of Archana not thinkinig at all, but I wouldn't call it taking advantage of Savita.
 
Re Sachin (Manav's brother), this is where you're wrong Bhalla. It was Manju who independently made the police complaint, using Archana's name. The other K family members who lived in the same house as Manju at that time, didn't even know what she did, so how can Archana be held responsible for this action and the terrible consequences, when she wasn't living there and therefore didn't know what was happening?
If a DIL is to be blamed for the actions of her family and the consequences, then Vandu should be blamed for everything that happens to her and her in-laws which are a consequence of action taken by any member of her family.
This approach isn't practical at all Bhalla. People keep blaming Archana for Sachin's death when she had nothing to do with it at all. Its time this stops.
 
Archana was very wrong to give Varsha the money for a necklace when Vandu had need for it. I won't defend Archana here.
 
I think you're wrong Bhalla to think that Archana hasn't repented for losing Soham and that it doesn't bother her to have given up her daughters. People react differently to similar situations. Probably Archana's way of coping is to pretend she is okay. She will laugh and talk to others when deep inside she is hurting. If she were to always be upset, that would mean her having to always be explaining to others why she is upset, thereby always having to talk about her chikdren. She could go into deep depression this way.
 
I don't think Archana ever did anything so bad that she deserved living without her daughers all these years. I think she never tried to contact Manav because she knew how much he hated her when he left. Imagine the person you love more than life itself, telling you that you are a bad mother, that he doesn't trust you. Imagine knowing that you are the reason why you have lost your son. Archana would be experiencing some degree ot depression (as too would Manav), having lost their son. To add to this loss, your husband tells you you are a bad mother and he has lost his trust in you, that your children are at rsik in your care?
 
Add to this Savita telling her that Manav doesn't want to always be looking over his shoulder, thinking she will one day come to take away the girls. What else was Archana to do but give up her girls. If she decided to go to court to fight for her girls, she would have been lambasted for that too. Whatever she did, Archana would have been criticised.
 
 It takes someone with guts to give up a child. I'm sure she never sought to contact Manav over the years because she didn't want him to think she was trying to take away her girls. No one had a problem with Shravani never having tried to contact anyone from the Deshmukh family, to ask about Sachin, and she knew where they lived. She was praised for having no contact with Sachin, so that he could grow up without confusion etc, yet Archana is blamed for not trying to contact Manav. Shravani was praised for supressing her motherly feelings for the good of her son, but Archana is blasted for doing the same for the good of her children. This is hypocisy.
 
It's good we can exchange differing views in this manner Bhalla.😊
Edited by suan - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by suan



Hi Bhalla,
You shouldn't apologise for expressing your opinions when you're not personally attacking anyone or being rude to anyone.
 
However, I must disagree with you on some points.
To me, Archana isn't scheming and manipulative, because she has never sought to wilfully hurt or harm anyone. Unilke Dharmesh, Rasika, Manu, Ajit, and Savita,...Archana has never wilfully sought to hurt anyone for personal gain. Dharmesh is the biggest culprit when it comes to being scheming and manipulative. To the end, he has schemed against Manav for no reason whatsoever, with the intention of physically harming him at times, and even wanting to cause his death.
 
I don't think Archana took advantage of Savita re Varsha and Sulochana. Manav was the person who first invited Varsha to stay without even telling Archana, much less telling Savita! I agree that Archana had no right ot invite Sulochana to stay at the D's house without first asking Savita, but I don't think that taking advantage of her. I think it was a case of Archana not thinkinig at all, but I wouldn't call it taking advantage of Savita.
 
Re Sachin (Manav's brother), this is where you're wrong Bhalla. It was Manju who independently made the police complaint, using Archana's name. The other K family members who lived in the same house as Manju at that time, didn't even know what she did, so how can Archana be held responsible for this action and the terrible consequences, when she wasn't living there and therefore didn't know what was happening?
If a DIL is to be blamed for the actions of her family and the consequences, then Vandu should be blamed for everything that happens to her and her in-laws which are a consequence of action taken by any member of her family.
This approach isn't practical at all Bhalla. People keep blaming Archana for Sachin's death when she had nothing to do with it at all. Its time this stops.
 
Archana was very wrong to give Varsha the money for a necklace when Vandu had need for it. I won't defend Archana here.
 
I think you're wrong Bhalla to think that Archana hasn't repented for losing Soham and that it doesn't bother her to have given up her daughters. People react differently to similar situations. Probably Archana's way of coping is to pretend she is okay. She will laugh and talk to others when deep inside she is hurting. If she were to always be upset, that would mean her having to always be explaining to others why she is upset, thereby always having to talk about her chikdren. She could go into deep depression this way.
 
I don't think Archana ever did anything so bad that she deserved living without her daughers all these years. I think she never tried to contact Manav because she knew how much he hated her when he left. Imagine the person you love more than life itself, telling you that you are a bad mother, that he doesn't trust you. Imagine knowing that you are the reason why you have lost your son. Archana would be experiencing some degree ot depression (as too would Manav), having lost their son. To add to this loss, your husband tells you you are a bad mother and he has lost his trust in you, that your children are at rsik in your care?
 
Add to this Savita telling her that Manav doesn't want to always be looking over his shoulder, thinking she will one day come to take away the girls. What else was Archana to do but give up her girls. If she decided to go to court to fight for her girls, she would have been lambasted for that too. Whatever she did, Archana would have been criticised.
 
 It takes someone with guts to give up a child. I'm sure she never sought to contact Manav over the years because she didn't want him to think she was trying to take away her girls. No one had a problem with Shravani never having tried to contact anyone from the Deshmukh family, to ask about Sachin, and she knew where they lived. She was praised for having no contact with Sachin, so that he could grow up without confusion etc, yet Archana is blamed for not trying to contact Manav. Shravani was praised for supressing her motherly feelings for the good of her son, but Archana is blasted for doing the same for the good of her children. This is hypocisy.
 
It's good we can exchange differing views in this manner Bhalla.😊

Excellent post Sharon di πŸ‘ 
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by suan


 
 
 
Hi Bhalla,
You shouldn't apologise for expressing your opinions when you're not personally attacking anyone or being rude to anyone.
 
However, I must disagree with you on some points.
To me, Archana isn't scheming and manipulative, because she has never sought to wilfully hurt or harm anyone. Unilke Dharmesh, Rasika, Manu, Ajit, and Savita,...Archana has never wilfully sought to hurt anyone for personal gain. Dharmesh is the biggest culprit when it comes to being scheming and manipulative. To the end, he has schemed against Manav for no reason whatsoever, with the intention of physically harming him at times, and even wanting to cause his death.
 
I don't think Archana took advantage of Savita re Varsha and Sulochana. Manav was the person who first invited Varsha to stay without even telling Archana, much less telling Savita! I agree that Archana had no right ot invite Sulochana to stay at the D's house without first asking Savita, but I don't think that taking advantage of her. I think it was a case of Archana not thinkinig at all, but I wouldn't call it taking advantage of Savita.
 
Re Sachin (Manav's brother), this is where you're wrong Bhalla. It was Manju who independently made the police complaint, using Archana's name. The other K family members who lived in the same house as Manju at that time, didn't even know what she did, so how can Archana be held responsible for this action and the terrible consequences, when she wasn't living there and therefore didn't know what was happening?
If a DIL is to be blamed for the actions of her family and the consequences, then Vandu should be blamed for everything that happens to her and her in-laws which are a consequence of action taken by any member of her family.
This approach isn't practical at all Bhalla. People keep blaming Archana for Sachin's death when she had nothing to do with it at all. Its time this stops.
 
Archana was very wrong to give Varsha the money for a necklace when Vandu had need for it. I won't defend Archana here.
 
I think you're wrong Bhalla to think that Archana hasn't repented for losing Soham and that it doesn't bother her to have given up her daughters. People react differently to similar situations. Probably Archana's way of coping is to pretend she is okay. She will laugh and talk to others when deep inside she is hurting. If she were to always be upset, that would mean her having to always be explaining to others why she is upset, thereby always having to talk about her chikdren. She could go into deep depression this way.
 
I don't think Archana ever did anything so bad that she deserved living without her daughers all these years. I think she never tried to contact Manav because she knew how much he hated her when he left. Imagine the person you love more than life itself, telling you that you are a bad mother, that he doesn't trust you. Imagine knowing that you are the reason why you have lost your son. Archana would be experiencing some degree ot depression (as too would Manav), having lost their son. To add to this loss, your husband tells you you are a bad mother and he has lost his trust in you, that your children are at rsik in your care?
 
Add to this Savita telling her that Manav doesn't want to always be looking over his shoulder, thinking she will one day come to take away the girls. What else was Archana to do but give up her girls. If she decided to go to court to fight for her girls, she would have been lambasted for that too. Whatever she did, Archana would have been criticised.
 
 It takes someone with guts to give up a child. I'm sure she never sought to contact Manav over the years because she didn't want him to think she was trying to take away her girls. No one had a problem with Shravani never having tried to contact anyone from the Deshmukh family, to ask about Sachin, and she knew where they lived. She was praised for having no contact with Sachin, so that he could grow up without confusion etc, yet Archana is blamed for not trying to contact Manav. Shravani was praised for supressing her motherly feelings for the good of her son, but Archana is blasted for doing the same for the good of her children. This is hypocisy.
 
It's good we can exchange differing views in this manner Bhalla.😊
 
Great...goes to say that yes Archana is not a goodess or perfect, yet she is very human (can make ocassional errors) and kind, surely much more humane than a lot of other characters in the serial...and for that she didnot deserve this kind  harsh punishment.
kabhi kabhi to lagta hai ki creatives are the biggest culprits...πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜†
Posted: 12 years ago
Archana was the most innocent person and best wife, DIL and mother...
 
 
Deshmukhs are not worthy of Archana...
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by Dabulls23


Archana was the most innocent person and best wife, DIL and mother...
 
 
Deshmukhs are not worthy of Archana...
Bingo!!πŸ‘πŸΌ This sarcasm is 3/4th true to my POV  varsha di,  except the innocent person partπŸ˜†

Archana has her own flaws like how Manav has. Neither of them is a saint. 
I wudnt agree that she is innocent but yes she is a good DIL, wife. For me she has failed as a mother to soham and not to other kids. 

But yes i totally agree the deshmukhs specially Savita the Mother India, is not worthy of a DIL like Archana the chanaπŸ˜ƒ 

Archana and Manav deserve each other. For me both are flawed and none is a saint.

Edited by Ankifan - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Wonderful Archana with big heart is consoling Evil Vahini Manju..
 
 
It takes only someone with wonderful sansakars to be able to look away from all the meanie things Vahini has done and console in the time of need...
 
 
Wonder if Sanskari Sulo will give Vinod his last rituals rights back as now she is also consoling her DIL
 
My heart just felt so good seeing today's episode...Love and care all over ...karanjkars are the santa spreading happiness...
Posted: 12 years ago
Am resting but I felt like responding to Sharon's post as some of the points she made were interesting .

To me, Archana isn't scheming and manipulative, because she has never sought to wilfully hurt or harm anyone.   What would you call what she did to Varun and Madhuri ? That it was only  Madhuri's decision ?  That Archana had no hand in the PERJURY committed blatantly in court ?Then why was she sitting in court to give that perjury her blessing ? How did Madhuri become her best friend by initially being called a DO TAKKE KI AURAT by the same Archana ? AFTER the lawyer apprised her of her sister's illegally wedded status ?

 Manav was the person who first invited Varsha to stay without even telling Archana, much less telling Savita! I agree that Archana had no right ot invite Sulochana to stay at the D's house without first asking Savita, but I don't think that taking advantage of her. I think it was a case of Archana not thinkinig at all, but I wouldn't call it taking advantage of Savita. Manav did everything to please HER and EVERYTHING he did was BLESSED by her , not REFUSED categorically . Sometimes , by weeping profusely on his chest she even PUT HIM UPTO IT by asking MANAV AAP KUCH KEEJIYE . This is the woman , who when she wants to refuse , CAN REFUSE , and boy can she do it strongly without bothering about Manav's feelings . For instance , in the chawl case , Archana told a FLAT NO to Manav when he told her to drop the case . But she could not when he brought Varsha home or decided to give up his lifes savings to buy her mother a house ? Is not that CONVENIENT ? His Mother Savita is supposed to bear her samdhan for months in her house and watch her son's money being put on her samdhan's name in entirety ...and this is NOT taking advantage but simply innocently 'not thinking" ? Even at the auction Savita told her That the money belongs to the kids but Archana told her firmly and irritatedly , I DON"T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT YOU WUD NEVER UNDERSTAND ANYWAYS . Can one see her STRONG WISH here that the money shud be spent on her MOTHER not KIDS and that she wanted NO INTERFERENCE in this decison  from her MIL ?

If a DIL is to be blamed for the actions of her family and the consequences, then Vandu should be blamed for everything that happens to her and her in-laws which are a consequence of action taken by any member of her family.
This approach isn't practical at all Bhalla. People keep blaming Archana for Sachin's death when she had nothing to do with it at all. Its time this stops. It would have stopped if Archana had done a counter case against Manju for getting a family beaten up in jail , for giving them a permanent police record and for the subsequent rejection of Sachin's visa that led to the shattering of his dreams and his drunken walk on the road and the tragic accident .
Sure , Girish did the phone call that broke the engagement and the truck driver put the truck in gear But WHY was the visa rejected ? The jailing had nothing to do with it ? The drunk walk was due to whom ?

Manju

Who protected Manju by giving her anticipatory bail ? Archana .

But who did not hesitate to put case on HUSBAND ? Archana .

No one has DIED in Lokhande family due to Vandu . If they had , even indirectly , trust me , Rasika wud have not let the Deshmukhs hear the end of it . So wud have Sulo if VINOD had died . The truth is Savita forgave Archana for Sachins death and even accepted Sulo in her house initially when bad days befell her ...she later got pissed off again due to Archana's neglect of her feelings and also as she misunderstood about the money .

The blame to Archana about Sachin's death goes MORALLY as it was SHE who let Manju go SCOT FREE . She and SULO . Manav looked at Archanas eyes and REFUSED to do a case against Manju saying Archanas family is MY family . Archana smiled at him for his 'UNDERSTANDING" . Manav behaved like a 'coached' husband . Then Archana went and sobbed in front of Damodar . Damodar too showed her ways to protect Manju . Unable to bear it , college going Vandu did what Archana shud have done ...she did the case and put at least AJIT in jail . For that she got kidnapped . For that she got defamed . Her self esteem got destroyed and scared , she married the man for the sake of her family's badnaami . A foolish girl ...but one can trace her tragic decision to the spate of unlucky events unleashed by Archanas decision of NOT prosecuting Sachins Moral killer Manju .

In my opinion Archana IS to be blamed and Manav and Damodar r to be EQUALLY blamed for going under Archana;s spell . Sachin was THEIR BLOOD , their rage shud have been bloodthirsty ...not quenchable by a beautiful sobbing face .

Vandu's decision to marry Ajit broke Savitas backbone . She became a tigress whose claws got plucked and cud no longer maul the killers of her son . She had to bend before Rasika and Manju for the rest of her life by adjusting wiith circumstances and keeping in mind that her foolish daughters fate depended on those 2 vicious women .

In my opinion THAT was the hardest punishment for Savita ...She even danced like a prostitute at Rasikas behest for her daughter 's happiness , the ignorant woman ! 

I DEFENDED Archana then . I wish I cud take back ALL my posts . Coz the way her character never developed was a STEADY PROGRESS . Nothing changed in Archana and the Deshmukhs suffered more and more losses due to her family and her blind love for it . Slowly but surely I started feeling a grudging sympathy for the crude , ignorant Savita .  I deplore her acts like pinching a baby etc . But her hate for Archana ...its not unfounded .

Today too she has run after Manju when Manju needed being left to her own fate . Her immediate willingness to forgive ANYONE from her maika is astounding . Her grudge against Manav for simply wanting to be rich however stayed put or a long time . She detested it and never quite forgave him for it . How surprising .

 People react differently to similar situations. Probably Archana's way of coping is to pretend she is okay. She will laugh and talk to others when deep inside she is hurting. If she were to always be upset, that would mean her having to always be explaining to others why she is upset, thereby always having to talk about her chikdren. She could go into deep depression this way. Will agree with u here .  She DOES foolishly pretend all is ok when she it most emphatically is not . But her private reflections have been very INADEQUATELY shown . She has been shown RATHER CONTENT with just Poorvi and Sulo and it IRKS us as the children grew up WITHOUT a mother .

What else was Archana to do but give up her girls. If she decided to go to court to fight for her girls, she would have been lambasted for that too. Whatever she did, Archana would have been criticised.

I am her most ardent critic but I am also a mother . THIS fight I wud have understood . I wud have continued blaming her for INVITING this fight in the first place but her bid to fight for the kids ...THAT I wud have understood . It takes guts to give children up in circumstances like Shravani's ...not Archanas . Shravani was an unwed mom . Archanas kids were born legally . Shravanis fiancee had DIED . Archanas husband was ALIVE . Just ANGRY . A little effort and she cud have brought him around . Which she did not bother to take but sat huddled like an unhappy lover in a rocking chair . Shravani and Savita had lost something common ...SACHIN ...which they both tried to replace with sumthing common ...SACHU . Shravani's child needed legitimacy . Archanas children did not . They were born within wedlock and both parents were alive and capable of great love . Shravani gave up her child to be brought up WITH a mother and father AND the grieving grandmother ...A complete family . She requested Archana to look after Sachu for life . Even then Shravni's decision to give her kid up is debatable ...I DO understand those who say Shravni shud have taken Sachu with her to give him a better life rather than leave him in that chawl . Never have I not conceded to THAT . 

But Giving up children when ur legally married , when u LOVE ur husband , when u KNOW he is rightfully angry , When u have just lost a child  and u shud now cling more to the existing children , when one of them ...SAchu is a promise who u have to fulfil to be answerable to  his existing mom who has left him by trusting YOU in YOUR care ...giving up ALL that just so u win ur husband back by giving him a msg of sorts ...THAT shocks .

Shravani shud have clung to Sachu as he was Sachin's nishaani ...but at that point we did not know if Shravani intended to ever marry again .

With Archana the possibility of remarraige was not even there . She practically gave her LIFE away ...and for what ? For LOVER's EGO . It hurt her that Manav did not bother about HER but only asked about the kids . So Ok , u take the kids , Here they R , she said sadly and bitterly and WAITED for him to come and placate her . 

That was NOT the time for WAITING . It was the time for RUNNING . Behind the kids .

As a matter of fact , she ran . On the roads . At the last minute . But by then it was too late .

I merely gave my take as I found ur points interesting .  It was not to refute u or shut u down . Just a discussion .😊



















 





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