Originally posted by ummesulaiman
I usually like to read posts silently, but whenever someone puts Bhabo down in the slightest fashion, my fingers seem to find their way to the keyboard
. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and mine is that I love Bhabo. If you'll read my post again, you'll notice that in no way am I putting Bhabo down. If it came across like that, then I'm sorry.
She may be uneducated, but she's a very good judge of character and has a very practical way of thinking. Agreed
You may call her thinking old world, but in the real world, only women who are able to balance both worlds are able to survive. I hate to be hard on anyone of the fairer sex , but that's the truth of it. Old world doesn't necessarily mean antiquated. Both my grandmothers were old world, but that didn't mean they were out of touch, merely that they had a more conservative way of thinking. Bhabo is just like that, nothing wrong in that.
Majority of the women in this world no matter how educated, career oriented, or "modern" they are, eventually grow tired of one night stands or coming home to nothing but the cat. They do want to settle down with someone, and eventually feel their biological clocks ticking and do want to have a family.
And unless you're rich enough to eat out every night or afford servants, you will have to learn to cook and clean. This is not rocket science it's common sense, and almost as basic a necessity as the cell phone or internet is now a days. This is what surprises me about Sandhya's upbringing. Agreed her parents wanted her to become a police officer, but that didn't mean Sandhya shouldn't learn cooking. Her mother was anxious to marry her off asap, but she never bothered to give her lessons in cooking. Totally unbelievable! Especially in an Indian family.
A degree will help put food on the table, but it will be raw.
I have a BBA & an MS, manage my husbands medical practice, homeschool my son, juggle numerous activities which require driving all over Chicago, conduct a sewing workshop for girls 10 - 15 years of age on the weekends, manage our finances, do our taxes, write a FF, and still make time to make sure my family gets 3 hot meals everyday. I'm not as great a cook as my mom, but I've had more than one party guest say I could write a book. Wow! A superwoman just like my mother
It's not just me... my mom, sister, aunts, grandmoms are all like that. We all received training from our mothers like that before we got married. They are all educated (MBAs, MDs, PHDs), but had the same opinion, you have to know how to manage your house before you manage your career, because no one will give you a break in that department, especially not your Saas. Both my grandmothers were from an era where girls were not educated, but their POV was the same like you've stated so no issues there.
By the way, last time I checked, staying at home, taking care of family, being polite to husband was called creating a happy home life not servitude. I was merely stating how Bhabo had put it across to Sandhya (the impression created on the viewer) & next by Chavvi when talking about the result of failing.
Don't even get me started on Chavi...the way she's been portrayed so far...she is such a waste of oxygen. She's dumb, lazy, and mean to Sandhya for no reason. Let's not forget that she ditches classes to see movies and lies about going to the library to study so she can hang out with her friends. So of course she was bound to fail...what would you do with an umambitious daughter who does that? Continue to waste money on her education? Chavvi is just another Vikram in different circumstances For her studies are not for becoming a better person or for a better future, rather they're for escaping home & responsibilities.
Her mother is not marrying her off...she's only trying to teach her skills that she will need one day, else she'll be stressed like Sandhya is nowadays. She doesn't want her daughter to have problems in her Sasural. Does that make Bhabo evil? I don't think so. The marrying off idea was Chavvi's. But in real life, I've seen families where the daughter has been married off rather than educated (but not ignorant in cooking), due to various reasons. I don't think Bhabo is evil at all, strict yes, but not evil. She's like a coconut, hard on the outside but soft on the inside.
Sandhya's made it so far because she's got a supportive person like Suraj and believe it or not even Bhabo behind her (Remember how Bhabo took care of Dhai Sa and her "needs more salt" issue
). Having said that...in the real world not everyone's husband is a Suraj. Agreed
Yes, Bhabo has a severe tongue, but like I've said before, considering what she has to put up with in the form of family members...I don't blame her.
The fact that Bhabo let Chavi study I believe is proof that Bhabo is not against education. I too think when Sandhya's education will be revealed the problem will not be the education, but rather the fact that it was concealed by her and her family.
I think this is when Sandhya's honesty and the good will she has built up with Bhabo will prove to be her saving grace. Bhabo will get over it...be it eventually (I mean every Saas is entitled to a little drama...especially a TV Saas
). And as Sandhya polishes her home economics skills, and along with Suraj's support, she'll win over Bhabo and whatever reservations she may have in Sandhya becoming an IPS officer.
Suraj and Sandhya's marriage is like all marriages in a way a compromise. Both will learn to give a little and change a little and learn from each other to complement each other...Phir hi to bane gain. ... Diay aur Baati Hum.