Riddhima and i have been best friends since time immemorial! We both lived in the opposite blocks of our residency and at the same opposite floors. We have been studying in the same school and we are quite popular everywhere! People many times mistook us as lovers too but that was never the scene really. I wish it was though. Coz i really dont know since when i have been crazily in love with her and i can garuantee that if i dont see her once every day i would seriously die! She has been like a lucky charm for me , for example, once she went on a holiday with her family and i didnt see her for two days and i met with an accident, i big one! And since that times whenever she went out of town i made sure i saw her and heard her on skype.call me a fool or superstitious but thats the truth for me! Yes we are this inseparable. Her smile just makes my day! And my days havent been good at all since a month because her smile has gone. Its lost! And i desperately need it back!
I didnt realise when it was early morning and the sun was already rising. I was standing leaning on the balcony door for almost the complete night lost in my thoughts. Thoughts of my beautiful life before..my friendship with my Riddhima and my love for her. It made my heart heavy to think how much things changed in just a matter of a month. & now i was feeling sleepy..my eyes were drooping and i felt weak. Letting out a heavy sigh i dragged my exhausted and tired body to my bed to take a small nap before its time to leave for school.
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I had reached school just the moment the gate was going to be closed and for the upteenth time in this month i had entered school without bathing...Yuck! right? I know you all must be going EWWW..Gross! dirty guy and all but how do i help myself. Riddhima's pain and her thoughts drown me every moment. i get up late almost everyday because my night goes into thinking about her and watching her sitting alone and weeping every night. When i enter the bathroom to get ready i lose my mind into that world again and if im brushing my teeth ..the brush would remain in my mouth for infinite time as im staring into the mirror in front of me remembering her again. Tying the knot of my necktie would remind me how i was never able to tie the knot and would go to school stuffing it in my blazer pocket and get it done by Riddhima before the unfiorm checking session would start. Those memoeries make me sad.Its difficult to overcome them and concentrate on anything else. Its making me desperate now! I want to rid her off the pain!
Everyday i see her quitely sitting in the class at the last bench diving her head in the books so that none notice her crying and tears.and how do i know this...well i had borrowed her notes for a day as i had missed the school and when i saw her notebook pages my tears had spilled too. Every page of her notebook was stained with her dry tears. And anyways i was never blind as well. I saw her puffy eyes everyday! People here look at her with pity in their eyes. And i know it hurts her. And i feel helpless.
I entered the library to get some books for my IIT preparation. As i reached the last section in the room to get the required books i saw her arranging the shelves, cleaning them, dusting the books and placing them in order. She was lost in her thoughts. That emptiness in her eyes ...i knew it too well. She hadnt noticed me looking at her from a distance. I kept staring at the love of my life. She looked so innocent and so damn pretty in the school uniform. She wore the box pleated checkered skirt which ended just above her knees with the white blouse well tucked in the skirt and her tie whose knot was always perfect. Her heels boots made her look a little taller so that she would reach just till my shoulders. Her luscious hair would always be tied in a side ponytail and her hair would rest on her shoulder. Her charming face would look evern cuter with that thin hairband she was adorn.
While i was busy complimenting her with my eyes i noticed she was getting teary eyes again. She would not cry in front of anyone and always tried to find an escape so she could let free those tears. She was slogging day and night to keep her and her mother's life stable. She was never the cleanliness freak. Her room would always be in a mess which i would clean every weekend and there she was doing the job of cleaning the library shelves everyday so she could earn some little money to support her family. We both belonged to middle class simple families and though aunty is a working lady. I know how difficult it becomes to raise a daughter and manage all finances after the death of the head of the family.
I couldnt see her in tears anymore. I went upto her from behind slowly and placed my hand gently on her shoulder. She recognised my touch at once and tried to wipe her tears and turned back to me. But who was she lying to? I knew her better than she knew herself and she was well aware of that. She gave me a half hearted smile but couldnt say a word. She was choking on her voice and the same was the case with me we kept staring into each others eyes til all the barriers broke and our tears started pouring down our eyes. I cupped her face my in palms while she was badly sobbing and immediately engulfed her in a hug. She hid hersef in the crook of my neck and wept. My heart felt like tiny needles piercing it making it bleed profusely while she cried. I kept quite and let her be. Words were never needed between us. Our silence spoke volumes. It was serene.
While Riddhima calmed down in my arms i felt like an urgent need to let my feelings out to her. I couldnt control them anymore. The pain was becoming unbearable now. I had to! I had to let it out!
"Riddhima..." i said in a very low whisper in her ears. That made her look at me. Our faces were milimetres away from each other. Our noses almost touching each other. She could notice the change in my eyes. My hands rested on her waist while she held my shoulders. Her eyes questioned me constantly for why i broke the hug and the moment. i had to do it now. It was now or never.
"I Love You Riddhima" these were the only words that escaped my mouth in a hoarse and low whisper and before she could react i had claimed her lips in a kiss. Yes! I had lost my head since she was in my arms! I was kissing her in a corner of my school library! I was crazy! I know!
Riddhima wasnt reacting while i was gently nibbling on her lips. She wasnt giving in nor was she retaliating. I was unaware of the surroundings near me while i was gently rubbing her waist trying to make her react to the kiss. To make her give in and she did! She did it in the heat of the moment. she had her eyes closed and was trying to hold herself against me while she was going weak in her knees.
Our moment was turning passionate when the shrill voice of the school bell disturbed us and marked the end of the day. And that brought Riddhima out of the reverie and no prizes for guessing she was utterly embarrased and felt guilty for her actions. I could see the tears forming yet again in her eyes while she moved away from me swiftly..took her bad and ran away from me crying uncontrollably.
I was standing rooted to the earth not able to fathom what had happened between us in the last few minutes and by the end of it i felt like i had messed up a big time. I felt like i was going to lose my friend. My everything. Damn! I had already lost her. Her running away from me made me mad for kissing her but she then even responded to it! Then why and what was that? I ran a frustated hand through my thick hair and decided to go anf find her before something even worse happens. I was scared!
I took my bike from the bike stand trying to escape the rain which had started just then and was getting heavier and heavier. It was getting dark at 4 in the evening coz of the dark clouds which covered the sky above me and i was panicking. I knew Riddhima would be walking back home so i turned my bike in a swift action and zoomed out of the school gate to find her. I was driving like a mad on the roads trying to locate her. The roads had become slippery and it was making me difficult to ride and i almost met with a head on collision with a car but i was lucky enough to escape it and before the driver could even react and shout at me..i was out of the sight! I was heading towards the society trying to search her at the same time. I wasnt able to find her! I was sad, scared, frustated and broken! Just before our residential area there was a forest land which was like a forest. Dense and tall teakwood trees were planted there and when i stopped my bike almost giving up on trying to find her i heard the sobs of a girl from the woods. Thought the rain was too heavy and noisy i could hear her completely and somehwre my heart told me to go and check if it was the girl i was searching for. I put the stand of bike and ran into the woods. I reached her as fast as i could and i was right..it was Riddhima! She sat resting her head against the tree and was crying her heart out.
Her hair were messy, her eyes were bloodshot red, she was completely soaked in rain and her uniform clung to her petite bodice. I bent down in front of her while she cried hiding her face in her palms. I slowly took her hands in mine and removed them from her face. I could see she was not expecting me here.
"Armaan? What are you doing here? Please go away...i feel nothing for you..i dont know why i kissed you ..but im sorry...please just...just..." she said hiccuping. I should have felt heartbroken and shattered at that point of time but guess what i wasnt! Because i had noticed something she didnt wanted to let me see.
Through the translucent material of her white shirt i saw a pendant hidden inside and if i wasnt wrong it was a heart pendant and an "A" was engraved on it. I had never seen it before. Probably she got it after that accident. While she was busy aplogising and trying to escape from me i shamelessly undid the first to buttons of her shirt and took the pendant out. She was shcoked out of her wits but i had to do it. And once she realised what i did and what i had found she couldnt move or say anything anymore. She was left speechless with her mouth wide open and she kept staring in my eyes while i had this huge smile on my face while i was holding the pendant in my hand.
"would you still say that you fee nothing for me? And that whatever happened was nothing?" i questoned her in a low voice. I was waiting for her to speak up but she didnt say anything but snatched the pendant from my hand and got up turning her back towards me "i cant love you Armaan...and we arent meant to be..please go away" her voice was breaking again. But i wasnt going to give up today..no more!
I swiftly went in front of her and held her from her shoulders and made her look towards me. "why cant you?" while she remained mum the heavy rain made scary noises with the thundering. "Answer me Riddhima". She wasnt speaking up. I was staring straight into her deep green eyes waiting for her to speak up. Our faces were so close i could feel her ragged breathing. I knew i was having an effect on her which she was trying to hide but was failing anyways.
"i dont deserve you"she spoke trying to catch her breath breaking away our eyelock. "and why is that so ?" i questioned her.
" i am no more the girl who was friends with you...no more the girl you fell in love with...i m just a dead body now...just breathing Armaan...i have changed...my life has changed...its only filled with sadness and darkness...there is no way out of it...i dont want you to waste your time with someone who probably doesnt even have a bright future..dad's death has taken everything with it...nothing is left now...please ...just let me go...just..." she said . her voice low and sad.
"What makes you think i will believe your words?"
"Please armaan dont make this difficult for me..." she was struggling in my arms now...but alas i was too strong.her sobs were getting heavier but i wasnt going to let her go today.
"Riddhima say you love me...i am the guy you deserve...you are the only person i have ever wanted and i will ever want in my whole life. I want to make your life just the way it was before..i want my old Riddhima back and i will get her. If u think my Riddhima is no more the girl who is standing in front of me then fine ! i will get her back...i will...you cant stop me now...say it Riddhima!"
"i cant love you Armaan"
"you do...and you will"
"please Armaan..."
We were silently crying the tears of agony...of what life had done to us...we were two souls craving to be with each other but ...
I cupped her face in my palms. I made her look at me ...in my eyes..
"i love you Riddhima...just give us a chance..just one chance...i dont want to live without you anymore. We both need each other..and you know that...look at me and say it Riddhima" i knew with her slowly changing expressions that i had melted her...i just waited for her to break the silence and say those words i was craving for her to say.
"i..i l...I Love You Armaan...I Love You.." and with that she crashed in my chest hiding her face in my chest making me feel like the most luckiest guy on this earth. Not to forget the happiest too.
I brought her closer to my chest and buried my face in her hair and we stayed like that till eternity . we felt like what it was to be in our lover's arms and feel at peace. We sealed our new found relationship with a pssionate kiss in the rain (so extremely romantic right?) and lay the foundation of a new journey...the journey of out love...or togetherness and a new life.
p.s. Rhea dare u say this time that the OS is so short..it was bloody 6 pages on MS Word 😆
p.p.s. sorry for the typos and errors...im too lazy to edit them..pssshhttt \\
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