Katrina Kaif FAILS to impress as Chikni Chameli! - Page 6

Chikni Chameli: An insult to item numbers

As Katrina and the makers of this film have not followed the above law they must be arrested for wrong publicity, spreading misinformation and plain simple God damned lying! This song must thus be immediately rebranded as a 'mildly hot song featuring Katrina in a guest appearance' instead of 'amazingly mind blowing item number'

I mean Katrina is definitely not portrayed as Chikni in this song. You can just pick an ordinary chick named Chameli and point out its knee and this would be truer to the Chick-Knee Chameli nomenclature than Chameli's Chikniness.
 
I mean I am outraged! OUTRAGED DAMMIT! For years I have been an avid chronicler of item numbers in the history of Indian cinema. I have seen hundreds of item songs in their natural habitat - The fine institution of B grade and C grade films like ' Aawara Romeo' , 'Khopdi - The Skull', 'Jungli Jawani' and many more .

These films have been classics because when they promise an item number they deliver an item number! Not a guest appearance song by Katrina wearing an abnormally increased amount of clothing!

Chikni Chameli is an insult to all the great item girls who have made the art of Item Numbery an institution. Great women who did great justice to great item numbers in great B grade and C grade films. Great people like :

Mutton Manorama
Milky Malleshwari
Sexy Savitha ( not Savitha Bhabhi)
Ravishing Raveena
Chamakti Champa
Rowdy Radhika
Lovely Lalita
Sultry Supriya
Devil Deepa
Pagal Pammi
Gazab Gayatri
Dirty Damini
Lambchop Lata
Nathkhat Natasha
Masala Mallika
Super Sunanda
Meat Meenakshi
Sweet Swati
Pretty Priyanka
Nadaan Nalini