Deciphering Anjali - Page 2

this was one wonderful post..n specially thank u 4 sharing ur personal experience..cz 2 days back i was going 2 make a topic asking if anyone knew a real life Anjali..regarding her blind faith devotion and puja path for her husband..i was intrigued cz i had never known someone like that.may be cz i haven't observed these nuances when i'm with any of my aunts n uncles(well that is the last thing one would do when u can be with ur cousins) and having no married friends..i really have no real experience of such..

but reading this..well i guess it was a good thing u decided it was a lost cause..but i guess u did the right thing of telling her even if it resulted in the bad fall out..cz otherwise every day in life when u met her after that u'll feel guilty and think 'should I be hiding something this big from her?'

but i guess ur friend probably knows that what u say is true in a subconscious level..but as u said the guy fulfills his responsibilities as a father and a husband and is sweet with her in normal situations...so she must have make that unconscious decision that she will turn blind to all else that lack...denial and living in that happy place in one's mind is a manner of coping..u know mind is a fascinating thing and operates in surprising ways...it sometimes prefers to close out all unpleasant things so dealing with it is easier if u pretend it is not there..

and anyway think of ur friend's options..u said she had kids..and i guess rocking the boat must be a terrifying thought..

I'm sad that she lost out on such a good friend who looked out for her welfare...but well i guess the saying 'u can lead the donkey to the water..but u can't make it drink it' exists for a reason..

a prayer for ur friend...if not the strength to walk out..hoping she'll have the strength to endure..

I'm really sorry to hear that!! :( Like you said, people like Anjali do exist... And thank you for making this post! I don't understand why people are cribbing abt Khushi not telling Anjali! Come on! You really have the courage to say so? To a person who loves and trusts her husband more than herself? I could never do that. Especially cause the ENTIRE family has the same picture of him. If at least one person was indifferent towards Shyam, Khushi could talk to that person...but here, like they showed in the previous episode, EVERYONE praises Shyam! It's not that easy...

Sorry to hear about your friend...

Thanks friends for reading and commenting on the post.

Even as I wrote the post, I was feeling pretty rotten that somehow I might be betraying my ex-friend. But I've really tried to keep her identity anonymous because the last thing i want for her is to be ridiculed by anyone.

I see shades of my friend in Anjali. As princessunara said, my friend has kids with this guy, she really has never held a job and is not financially independent. her parents cannot support her not after three kids with him. so she is societally bound to him. And this did not happen in India, this is happening right here in the U.S. She is here and decidedly her husband is a rich guy. So she might have weighed her options and decided that a known devil is better than an unknown friend.

And then i tried to rock her boat and i am sure she knew it all but did not want anyone else pointing it out to her. I hope she has found her peace with her decisions.

I seriously think such women save their revenge for the last years of their lives. I am sure she will turn around when this guy is older, less wanted by others and needs her help to take care of him. But really, that is a pathetic time to be exacting revenge.

In any case, i wish her well. I'd be interested to know if she watches IPKKND 😆 but really there is no way for me to know and i really woiuldn't want to touch her or her family with a 10 foot pole.

Fab topic... 

It is a sad situation and I do feel for  the loss of your friendship...

don't they say when one's spouse is playing the field, the wife is the last one to know... This is true...

Such men know how to brain wash their wives...

I don't know about your friends status, but perhaps she wanted to turn a blind eye to his behaviour and be on denial as she had all the comforts which are provided by him.

She may have not wanted to disturb the peace at home and upset her children... there may be family pressures... who knows if her family will be able to accept the fact ... She may have been afraid of her future... At least in the west there is legal aid and other facilities for women who are caught in such situations...

I don't want to take names but haven't we seen such incidents in the lives of film stars? Wives are fully aware that their husbands are straying but still prefer to remain docile ...

If he had threatened you through FB with dire consequences imagine what he would have threatened her with... I don't know these are only my assumptions...

True... when faced with such situations it is hard to take a stand... At least  she could have been on alert and done some investigation herself... This is what I will do... After all there is no smoke without fire and it's good to be safe than sorry...

In IPKKND Khushi thinks Anji wont  be able bear the pain... If I was Khushi I would have turned to ASR... whether he believes it  or not that is another story... but I would have laid my cards on the table and said now do what you want...

Shyam is a compulsive liar and a schemer... perhaps he needs counselling 😆

Edited by LadyLaLa - 12 years ago

Serial I read your post with a great deal of interest and funnily enough that was what was also going through my mind about Anjali's reaction as I too had a similar experience albeit it was a girlfriend boyfriend relationship.( He was the worst sleaze ball on a slime bucket but she refused to believe me when I told her that and he later proceeded to break her heart with some dire consequences)

One day for sure she will appreciate that you were a really good friend who meant the best for her and even though she may lack the courage to look you in the eye, she will thank you in her heart and that is the best that can be wished for. Sending you healing energy and hope you continue to do what you think is right.

Thanks FLS - I really don't care at this time whether she realizes what I was trying to do. its been 6 years and the edge has worn off. im at peace. just watching anjali reminded me of the bitter months of arguments and threats. sad part is, i cant talk about the threats to my family, my husband would shoot this guy down, fortunately, they are not friends or anything because somewhere my husband had a sense of unease about this guy and did not want to be friends with him.