FF :dakshna reunion,versn 2.0 - Page 9

Posted: 12 years ago
lucky...thnx sweetuπŸ€—...misd u vaise😊
nd u r rite wit ur assumptn regrding ayi...baki ke parts comin upπŸ˜›...
Edited by sweetaish - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
                                          πŸ˜†DISCLAIMER RELOADED πŸ˜†:
 
botch up tho as predicted mene kar hi diπŸ˜†, full on dialog bazi frm here on...and am makin a BIG assumptn ki Mr. Joshi posesses the requisite amnt f grey cells nd thoda common senseπŸ˜› so dat our darling lawyer can prove the case in one fell swoop...
 
note 2 lucky : yar, in ayush ka angle,
                       me ho gayi thi tangle,
                      henc frm ur story ka line,
                     borrow kia mene thoda, hope its fine...πŸ˜›
                            ["kan pakad ke" sryπŸ˜ƒ]
 
 
PART 12 :

This white car screeches to a halt right in front of the door. Ayush comes out.

Psycho flings the car door open and is about to start her rant-

A : Andar chalo.

She follows him into the front room, fuming.

S : Kya zarurat thi tumhe subhe phon karne ki? Ha?

A : [ sits down on the couch; she remains standing ] Kyu? Kisi ne sun liya kya?

She is thrown for a second, then ploughs on.

S : Mene tumse pehle bhi kaha tha ki me tumhe call kar lungi. Tumne call karke kya tamasha khadi ki pata hai tumhe? Akruti ne sun li !

Psycho's pitch is rising word by word.

Inside, in another room, Joshi is seen talking to someone [ he's not happy about it btw ], stops when he hears the unmistakably shrill tone of his daughter. "Sona...?"

His companion [ back to us ] signals him to listen.

In the front room, psycho continues..." Mene kaha tha akruti ko me dekh lungi..."

Joshi frowns. They hear ayush yell back at her.

Front room me, meanwhile :

Psycho wins the yelling competion hands down, then calms down some.

S : ...Tum samaj gaye tumhe kya kehna he daksh se? Uske bad ka me dekh lungi. akruti to peeche hatne ki soch bhi nahi sakti, me jo rahungi waha. Bas ek bar meri shadi hone do daksh se.

Someone claps from behind.

It's Daksh.

D : wah, Sonakshi. Wah! Manna padega. Tum kabhi haar nahi manti ho.  Ab bhi tumhe lagta he ki tum jeetogi.

Joshi is all confused.

J : Sona?

S : [ flabbergasted ] 😲 Papa !!

J : Kya ho raha he yaha?

psycho is busy trying to assemble her scrambled brain, so Joshi turns to his fav target : Daksh.

J : Ye sab kya bakwas ho raha he Daksh?

D : Agar itna sab kuch sun kar bhi apko kuch samaj nahi aya, tho shayad apki beti ke sath apko bhi therapy ki zarurat he.

J : [ furious ] Tum kehna kya chahte ho😑 ?

D : [ humorless laugh ] Miliye apki beti Sonakshi se. Actor/Lawyer/MAnipulator.

Joshi gives this mega frown...

D : Ji bilkul. Logo ki zindagi se khelna iski hobby he, aur sabse favourit pastime tho suicide he. Vaise Sonakshi, mujhe nahi pata tha ki cough syrup peekar bhi koi mar saktha he.

Psycho opens her mouth, and promptly shuts it again, seeing his expression.

J : [ thundering ] Daksh Patwardhan. Tum yaha muje isliye bula laye taki me tumhe meri beti ki aur insult karte dekhu? Mene tumhe warn kiya tha ki tum usse door raho ! Tumhari himmat kaisi hui--

Daksh holds up his hand calmly, halting Joshi's tirade.

D : Ap chup rahiye kuch der ke liye. Samajh lijiye ki me apke liye ek favor kar raha hu. Ayush se to meri bat ho hi gayi thi. Baki ka iska  drama khud apne dekh bhi liya. Soch ke dekhiye ki ye jo bhi kehti he, usme sach kitna kam hota he.

J : Tum--

This time ayush cuts in.

A : Apki beti kitni khatarnak he ye shayad ap bhi nahi jante. Mujhe achi tarah se pata he, ki apne fayde ke liye ye kaha tak ja sakti he. Phir chahe raste me kisi ki zindagi bhi ho. Apne thodi der pehle sun bhi liya hoga, lekin me ek bar aur keh deta hu apke liye. Isne mujhe dhamkaya tha, gunde bheje the yaha-

Psycho starts her drama again, all teary eyes and trembling lips

S : Papa, mene-

Joshi looks at her dubiously. Psycho ki ankhen ab saucer se bhi badi he 😲.. Daddy dearest ko doubt jo hone laga he...

Ayush continues.

A : Me nahi mana to dhamkiya aur badhi. Kabhi case to kabhi meri job. Aur phir isne track change bhi kiya, yeh keh kar ki shadi ke bad me Akruti ke sath kuch bhi kar sakta hu... Me sochta tha ki me galat hu, lekin ye...[ looks at her ] Tumse to behtar me hi hu. Me janta hu ki me ne hadh kab par kar di thi. [ turns back to joshi ] Mujhe iski dhamkiyo aur chalo se ab koi farak nahi padta. Me akruti se hi shadi karunga, aur wo meri marzi he iski nahi.

Joshi is boiling up but is doubtful now. Khud jo isne suna tha psycho ka ranting...

D : Dhamkiya to muje bhi milti thi, bas suicid ke roop me. Us din me bat karne aya tha, to hath katne ka natak kiya tha isne ghar par. Yad hoga apko.

Joshi's brows are all screwed up now [ flashback of psycho's excuses over the cut on her wrist ]

D : phir fractur ka natak. mere ghar ayi aur waha kya kya tamasha khada kiya...ayi se itne jhoot bole, kyu apse bhi to jhoot kitne bole. Kya zarurat thi use utne din waha rehne ki? Lene aye the na use.

Joshi thinks about the maid's dubious story of psycho falling and getting her arm fractured, and the major telling off psycho gave him nd supriya wen they went to bring her home.

D : [ sarcastic ] Entertainment shayad kam pad gayi thi, isliye meri behen ki zindagi se bhi khelne lagi. Kahaniya to aur bhi bahot he. Ghar le jayiye apni beti ko, baki ka wo bata degi.

Joshi looks at all of them turn by turn. Psycho is completely psycho now. Starts mumbling lekin nothing is distinct. None of her excuses coherent. She is completely at a loss, and real tears this time. She has lost the game now.

J : [ angry ] Ghar chal Sona. [ takes her hand and starts for the door ]

Psycho starts to say something, then looks to Daksh beseechingly. She even reaches out a hand to him [ totali nuts, told youπŸ˜›]

D : Mr. Joshi.

Joshi turns, irritated, holding back the derailed girl like you would an ill-mannered child.

D : Ho sake to apni beti ko samjha dijiye ki me koi trophy nahi hu jo wo baki sabko harake hasil kar le... Me Sonakshi se shadi nahi karne wala. Iss bar wo apni nas sach me kat le, seediyo se gire ya phir kahi aur se [ killer look for psycho ] muje koi farak nahi padta. Jaise apne kaha tha, door rahunga isse.

Joshi walks off, dragging psycho with him to her car.

Psycho keeps turning back, mumbling "Daksh" every few seconds.

She is bundled into the car.

Daksh  looks on dispassionately.

 

 

                                    ... contd ...

 

ps : guys don wry, only 2 more parts...phir happi eve afte😊😊😊😊... 

 
 
 

Edited by sweetaish - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago

J : Tum--

This time ayush cuts in.

A : Apki beti kitni khatarnak he ye shayad ap bhi nahi jante. Mujhe achi tarah se pata he, ki apne fayde ke liye ye kaha tak ja sakti he. Phir chahe raste me kisi ki zindagi bhi ho. Apne thodi der pehle sun bhi liya hoga, lekin me ek bar aur keh deta hu apke liye. Isne mujhe dhamkaya tha, gunde bheje the yaha-

Psycho starts her drama again, all teary eyes and trembling lips

S : Papa, mene-

Joshi looks at her dubiously. Psycho ki ankhen ab saucer se bhi badi he 😲.. Daddy dearest ko doubt jo hone laga he...

Ayush continues.

A : Me nahi mana to dhamkiya aur badhi. Kabhi case to kabhi meri job. Aur phir isne track change bhi kiya, yeh keh kar ki shadi ke bad me Akruti ke sath kuch bhi kar sakta hu... Me sochta tha ki me galat hu, lekin ye...[ looks at her ] Tumse to behtar me hi hu. Me janta hu ki me ne hadh kab par kar di thi. [ turns back to joshi ] Mujhe iski dhamkiyo aur chalo se ab koi farak nahi padta. Me akruti se hi shadi karunga, aur wo meri marzi he iski nahi.

@ bIue,
I hope ayush changes like this in real SSBN to help daksh bring out physco's truth...he may be a jerk but no one can become as bad and disgusting as physco😑 and aku is carrying his child so he should feel for her even a little bit...and aku's case and the recording are the ones thats gonna mess up everything for physco and rohini...not the arm banage or the cough syrup story or anything else...
 
Anyways great dialogues again aish!πŸ‘ cant wait for the next parts!!!!!!😊 btw are the slaps on physco over or should we wait for more??😍
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by sweetaish


                                          πŸ˜†DISCLAIMER RELOADED πŸ˜†:
 
botch up tho as predicted mene kar hi diπŸ˜†, full on dialog bazi frm here on...and am makin a BIG assumptn ki Mr. Joshi posesses the requisite amnt f grey cells nd thoda common senseπŸ˜› so dat our darling lawyer can prove the case in one fell swoop...
 
note 2 lucky : yar, in ayush ka angle,
                       me ho gayi thi tangle,
                      henc frm ur story ka line,
                     borrow kia mene thoda, hope its fine...πŸ˜›
                            ["kan pakad ke" sryπŸ˜ƒ]

No probs dear..πŸ˜› yaha phar bhi poetry.πŸ˜‰.I am impressed as usualπŸ‘πŸ‘
 
 
PART 12 :

This white car screeches to a halt right in front of the door. Ayush comes out.

Psycho flings the car door open and is about to start her rant-

A : Andar chalo.

She follows him into the front room, fuming.

S : Kya zarurat thi tumhe subhe phon karne ki? Ha?

A : [ sits down on the couch; she remains standing ] Kyu? Kisi ne sun liya kya?

She is thrown for a second, then ploughs on.

S : Mene tumse pehle bhi kaha tha ki me tumhe call kar lungi. Tumne call karke kya tamasha khadi ki pata hai tumhe? Akruti ne sun li !

Psycho's pitch is rising word by word.

Inside, in another room, Joshi is seen talking to someone [ he's not happy about it btw ], stops when he hears the unmistakably shrill tone of his daughter. "Sona...?"

His companion [ back to us ] signals him to listen.

In the front room, psycho continues..." Mene kaha tha akruti ko me dekh lungi..."

Joshi frowns. They hear ayush yell back at her.

Front room me, meanwhile :

Psycho wins the yelling competion hands down, then calms down some.

S : ...Tum samaj gaye tumhe kya kehna he daksh se? Uske bad ka me dekh lungi. akruti to peeche hatne ki soch bhi nahi sakti, me jo rahungi waha. Bas ek bar meri shadi hone do daksh se.

Someone claps from behind.

It's Daksh.

D : wah, Sonakshi. Wah! Manna padega. Tum kabhi haar nahi manti ho.  Ab bhi tumhe lagta he ki tum jeetogi.

Wah kya scene hainπŸ‘..I could imagine daksh's expressions while clapping.πŸ˜›.ek dum filmiπŸ˜‰..lved it

Joshi is all confused.

J : Sona?

S : [ flabbergasted ] 😲 Papa !!

J : Kya ho raha he yaha?

psycho is busy trying to assemble her scrambled brain, so Joshi turns to his fav target : Daksh.

J : Ye sab kya bakwas ho raha he Daksh?

D : Agar itna sab kuch sun kar bhi apko kuch samaj nahi aya, tho shayad apki beti ke sath apko bhi therapy ki zarurat he.

J : [ furious ] Tum kehna kya chahte ho😑 ?

D : [ humorless laugh ] Miliye apki beti Sonakshi se. Actor/Lawyer/MAnipulator.

Joshi gives this mega frown...

D : Ji bilkul. Logo ki zindagi se khelna iski hobby heπŸ˜†, aur sabse favourit pastime tho suicide heπŸ˜†. Vaise Sonakshi, mujhe nahi pata tha ki cough syrup peekar bhi koi mar saktha he.

Taliya..taliyaπŸ‘.πŸ‘.kitna khatarnak hobby hain iss psycho kaπŸ˜†

Psycho opens her mouth, and promptly shuts it again, seeing his expression.

J : [ thundering ] Daksh Patwardhan. Tum yaha muje isliye bula laye taki me tumhe meri beti ki aur insult karte dekhu? Mene tumhe warn kiya tha ki tum usse door raho ! Tumhari himmat kaisi hui--

Daksh holds up his hand calmly, halting Joshi's tirade.

D : Ap chup rahiye kuch der ke liye. Samajh lijiye ki me apke liye ek favor kar raha hu. Ayush se to meri bat ho hi gayi thi. Baki ka iska  drama khud apne dekh bhi liya. Soch ke dekhiye ki ye jo bhi kehti he, usme sach kitna kam hota he.

J : Tum--

This time ayush cuts in.

A : Apki beti kitni khatarnak he ye shayad ap bhi nahi jante. Mujhe achi tarah se pata he, ki apne fayde ke liye ye kaha tak ja sakti he. Phir chahe raste me kisi ki zindagi bhi ho. Apne thodi der pehle sun bhi liya hoga, lekin me ek bar aur keh deta hu apke liye. Isne mujhe dhamkaya tha, gunde bheje the yaha-

Psycho starts her drama again, all teary eyes and trembling lips

S : Papa, mene-

Joshi looks at her dubiously. Psycho ki ankhen ab saucer se bhi badi he 😲.. Daddy dearest ko doubt jo hone laga he...

Ayush continues.

A : Me nahi mana to dhamkiya aur badhi. Kabhi case to kabhi meri job. Aur phir isne track change bhi kiya, yeh keh kar ki shadi ke bad me Akruti ke sath kuch bhi kar sakta hu... Me sochta tha ki me galat hu, lekin ye...[ looks at her ] Tumse to behtar me hi hu. Me janta hu ki me ne hadh kab par kar di thi. [ turns back to joshi ] Mujhe iski dhamkiyo aur chalo se ab koi farak nahi padta. Me akruti se hi shadi karunga, aur wo meri marzi he iski nahi.

Joshi is boiling up but is doubtful now. Khud jo isne suna tha psycho ka ranting...

D : Dhamkiya to muje bhi milti thi, bas suicid ke roop me. Us din me bat karne aya tha, to hath katne ka natak kiya tha isne ghar par. Yad hoga apko.

Joshi's brows are all screwed up now [ flashback of psycho's excuses over the cut on her wrist ]

D : phir fractur ka natak. mere ghar ayi aur waha kya kya tamasha khada kiya...ayi se itne jhoot bole, kyu apse bhi to jhoot kitne bole. Kya zarurat thi use utne din waha rehne ki? Lene aye the na use.

Joshi thinks about the maid's dubious story of psycho falling and getting her arm fractured, and the major telling off psycho gave him nd supriya wen they went to bring her home.

D : [ sarcastic ] Entertainment shayad kam pad gayi thi, isliye meri behen ki zindagi se bhi khelne lagi. Kahaniya to aur bhi bahot he. Ghar le jayiye apni beti ko, baki ka wo bata degi.

Entertainment!!.outstandingly sarcasticπŸ˜†πŸ‘

Joshi looks at all of them turn by turn. Psycho is completely psycho now. Starts mumbling lekin nothing is distinct. None of her excuses coherent. She is completely at a loss, and real tears this time. She has lost the game now.

J : [ angry ] Ghar chal Sona. [ takes her hand and starts for the door ]

Psycho starts to say something, then looks to Daksh beseechingly. She even reaches out a hand to him [ totali nuts, told youπŸ˜›]

D : Mr. Joshi.

Joshi turns, irritated, holding back the derailed girl like you would an ill-mannered child.

D : Ho sake to apni beti ko samjha dijiye ki me koi trophy nahi hu jo wo baki sabko harake hasil kar le... Me Sonakshi se shadi nahi karne wala. Iss bar wo apni nas sach me kat le, seediyo se gire ya phir kahi aur se [ killer look for psycho ] muje koi farak nahi padta. Jaise apne kaha tha, door rahunga isse.

Iss dialogue pe tho..bajavo seetiπŸ˜‰..lved it..πŸ‘

Joshi walks off, dragging psycho with him to her car.

Psycho keeps turning back, mumbling "Daksh" every few seconds.

She is bundled into the car.

Daksh  looks on dispassionately.                              ... contd ...

 

ps : guys don wry, only 2 more parts...phir happi eve afte😊... 



Absolutely brilliantπŸ‘..daksh ke dialogues tho...πŸ‘πŸΌπŸ‘πŸΌ..Gr8 job aish..simple but superb powerful dialoguesπŸ‘ and scene..psycho ka tho bajgaya bandπŸ˜†
Edited by lucky.m - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago

mysti...thnx darlinπŸ€—...lekin aur nahi pls pls pretty pls...me sohini se tang aa gayi hu babeπŸ˜•...

ab to bas muje happi eva afte karvana he dakshna ka😊...dhulai done, thoda sa emo left, phir...guesesπŸ˜‰ ?
Posted: 12 years ago
lucky meri jaan...thnkuπŸ€—...was waitin 2 c which ones u'd hilite 2deπŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜† vaise bhi muje lag raha tha ki psycho ki bajane ke liye dialogs wud b more satisfyin, thappad se bhi zyadaπŸ˜‰...nd joshi ko bhi sunane ko mila khoob saraπŸ˜† njoyd writin dis particular part...equal 2 d initial round f thappadsπŸ˜†πŸ˜† glad u did 2😊
 
 
ps : poetry...cudnt resist as usualπŸ˜›
Edited by sweetaish - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Yaar Sweetu... tu ne to sahi main zoor ka jhatka zoor se dilaya hai πŸ˜†...
I must say intezaar ka faal sachi bahut mitta hai yaar... πŸ˜ƒ
Dakshu ke har ek dialogue ke liye zor se taliya πŸ‘ muahπŸ˜› 
big jadu ki jappi dear...πŸ€—
I like ki tune bhi Ayush ko +ve kiyaπŸ˜›... I too hope ki SSBN main bhi aaisa hi ho...πŸ˜‰
Ur idea of revealing psycho in front of her don papa was very nice... Just loved it πŸ‘
Each and every dialogue is superb πŸ˜› Esp this one of Dakshu
D : Agar itna sab kuch sun kar bhi apko kuch samaj nahi aya, tho shayad apki beti ke sath apko bhi therapy ki zarurat he. πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£
Joshi ki bhi aankhen khol di mast mast dialogues se... wah wah πŸ‘ πŸ€—
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by DakshnaFan


Yaar Sweetu... tu ne to sahi main zoor ka jhatka zoor se dilaya hai πŸ˜†...
I must say intezaar ka faal sachi bahut mitta hai yaar... πŸ˜ƒ
Dakshu ke har ek dialogue ke liye zor se taliya πŸ‘ muahπŸ˜› 
big jadu ki jappi dear...πŸ€—
I like ki tune bhi Ayush ko +ve kiyaπŸ˜›... I too hope ki SSBN main bhi aaisa hi ho...πŸ˜‰
Ur idea of revealing psycho in front of her don papa was very nice... Just loved it πŸ‘
Each and every dialogue is superb πŸ˜› Esp this one of Dakshu
D : Agar itna sab kuch sun kar bhi apko kuch samaj nahi aya, tho shayad apki beti ke sath apko bhi therapy ki zarurat he. πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£
Joshi ki bhi aankhen khol di mast mast dialogues se... wah wah πŸ‘ πŸ€—
 
thnku thnku thnkuπŸ€—...kaha thi re tu...misd u😊...in fact, i  evn held up part 12 tere liyeTongue...maza aya na...joshi ko sunane ka idea jo aya beech meπŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜†
Posted: 12 years ago
2nd LAST PART PEOPL..😊
 
 
 
Umm, emo he thoda sa, nd i've kept t lik, simpl...idea ye tha ki onc we giv sum credibility 2 aku...u get d drift na😊...so here it is...

 

evening, P-zoo :

 

Aku has finished her narration, and all r in various degrees of shock...

Shyamal is thodi si calm cos they had a call frm Daksh, frm ayush's place, but is stil worried for dakshna.

Sanket, poor guy, is sitting on the other end of the couch, wary.

Ayi is disconsolate; Aku is sitting with her, trying to soothe her.

A : [ continuing their convo ] ...Lekin beta...mene Naina ke sath itni nainsafi ki...Na chintu ki bat suni na uski...Bina kuch jane, bina soche samjhe kya kya nahi bol diya us bacchi ko mene...Kitna dil dukhaya uska...Kis muh se mafi mangu me usse ab...

Aku : Naina samaj jayegi Kaku...Ap janti he na Naina kaisi he...

A : [ shakes her head ] muje bhoolna nahi chahiye tha ki Naina ne iss ghar ke liye kitna kuch kiya tha...APna mana tha usne hum sab ko, aur mene...? Kisi aur ki bato me akar mene use paraya kar diya, apne ghar se kya, dil se bhi nikal diya use...Sonakshi to parayi thi hi, lekin Rohini...[ sniffs ] Chintu se me kya kahu...

Aku : KAku..

Ayi looks up.

Daksh is standing in the doorway, tired but wary and withdrawn. They donno how much he has heard..

He goes upto sanket, places his hand on his shoulder.

D : Dada...

Snkt looks up.

D : [ softly ] I'm sorry...

Snkt pats his hand, heaves a sigh and goes back to the pensive mode. [ poor guy; he doesn deserv a vamp lik rohini  ]

Daksh is about to go...

A : [ full of remorse ] Chintu...

Daksh stops, turns but says nothing.

A : Naina...

D : [ KP mode ] saman bhijvaya uska?

Aku : Nahi dada, wo aye the, saman lene lekin kaku ne vapis bheja unhe...Keh rahi thi ki wo kal aye...

Daksh storms off to Naina's office without another word.

 
 

ayi is worried, Aku offers to go check up on him...

A : Dada...

Daksh turns to her, softens a bit.

D : Ha akruti...

A : Ap...ap kya karne wale he ab?

D : Pata dhundna he Naina ka. Kaun si compny ai thi vaise...?

Releived, Aku smiles,  and tells him. She leavs the offic, Daksh calls up the packrs/movrs nd gets naina's adrs...

 

Ayi ventures in, after waitin for about half an hour...Daksh is stil in Naina's offic, in her chair, head down on the table.

She goes up, touches his shoulder.

D : Akruti me bilkul theek-- [ stops wen he sees its Ayi ]

A : Chintu...muje maaf kar de beta...[ strokes his cheek ] Me nahi janti thi ki tu aur naina ek doosre se kitna pyaar karte the...Mene sonakshi ke bato me akar na jane kya kar diya...[ heaves a sigh ] Tu sahi tha, aur me galat. Manti hu. Aur mujse hui bhool ko me sudhar lungi...Kaise bhi. [ pats his cheek, and leaves ]

Daksh stares after ayi, debating whether he should go after her...

But then, the day over now and its turmoils, he is unabl to find the strength for anything...He takes in a breath, holds it in; Saas lena bhi mushkil he...Everythin in the room, the table, the chair, the packed boxes, even the walls that are now stripped bare, remind him of HER...

He leans back into the chair, eyes closed...

 

                                                            ... contd ...
 
 
ps : ok, ok...aur nahi kheechungi...jus one more😊...kuch zyada hi lamba ho gaya na "Prequel"πŸ˜†...sry😊...
 
 
 
 
Edited by sweetaish - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Too good Aish dear...
Simply loved the last para of ur FF 😊 I really want to see Aai regret like this in actual SSBN also... 😊
So abhi happy ending door nahi hai... 😍
Thanks bud πŸ€—

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