Arnav and Shyam: food for thought

Posted: 12 years ago
Hi Guys,
I am a huge fan of IPKKND and do not miss an episode. Arnav and Khushi seriously have great chemistry and cannot wait till the track moves forward.
However, there is something that has been bothering me and not sure if anyone else feels the same way. To start off, don't get me wrong, I hate Shyam with a passion and hope he gets caught soon, but having said that, I wonder if our hatred towards Shyam and love for Arnav is somewhat biased due to the way the CVs play with the minds of the audience. Let me explain...
Everytime we see Shyam staring at or lusting over Khushi, we all jump to express our disgust and rightly so, because of the lying, cheating jerk that Shyam is. He has a wife who loves him very much and has made a commitment by marrying her, and yet he has the audacity to look at another woman and literally dream of her and of being with her. Now we recently found out that Shyam has married Anjali only for money and who knows, he probably has some other motive or enmity with Arnav for which he wants revenge. Hence, his marriage to Anjali was all part of a scheme and the one who he really has feelings for is Khushi. But let's not forget that we only found that out recently. the CVs have been successful in breeding hatred in our minds for Shyam long before this became apparent. The simple fact that he is married makes him looking at Khushi absolutely wrong, and I agree with that.
But let's look at Arnav for a moment. We are all waiting for the day that him and Khushi unite. Every eyelock between  them, every sequence where Arnav is shown to be thinking about Khushi is adored and cherished by the audience. But is Arnav also not committed to someone else? Does he also not have a girlfriend who he claims to love? Now it can be argued that he really doesn't love Lavanya and only thinks he likes her or has feelings for her because she is the only one who does not challenge him. But the same argument can be made for Shyam. He does not love Anjali and is only with her because she has money. They are both with their significant others for reasons other than love, but the fact remains that they are both committed to someone else. Then why is it that we spew out our hatred for Shyam but encourage Arnav at every step? How do we legitimize Arnav's feelings for Khushi when we cannot stand the thought of Shyam even looking at her? Are they not doing the same thing in principle? Are we somehow inclined to encourage Arnav's feelings simply because it is ingrained in our psyche that Arnav is the protagonist? or is the melodious music that plays in the background when Arnav is thinking of Khushi versus the unpleasant tunes that play when Shyam is on screen? 
Just so you know, I am not against Arnav nor am I justfiying Shyam's actions. But it is just a thought and wanted to share hoping that it would trigger an interesting discussion. :)
Posted: 12 years ago
Its refreshing to see a new perspective once in a while.

True, everyone (mostly) on this forum hates Shyam to the core.

But the creatives of this show have presented Shyam in such a way that it is not possible to root for him. In the earlier episodes he ditches Anjali just to be at Khushi's house, keeps telling lies to her etc.
At that time they showed him as a pleasant chap who helped Khushi during times of distress.
It seemed he's stuck in a loveless marriage which probably happened out of some majboori.

However, lately they've turned his character into a completely negative one  - he's deliberately putting Khushi into trouble, has admitted in his thoughts that he has Anjali as his financial backup etc. 

Arnav on the other hand is a guy who has been shown to have feelings for Khushi despite being rude and mean to her, and cares for her! He does not intend to deliberately harm Khushi.Other staunch Arnav admirers on this forum will express his positive traits better than me😊
Lavanya just turned positive in the last episode and hence has been disliked till yesterday.
Even now she'll only garner sympathy for herself, no one will wish for her to get married to Arnav!

Of course one of the reasons people love Arnav despite his shortcomings is probably because Barun Sobti is playing the character - myself included πŸ˜Š 




Edited by sbk2 - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Angelina..

in theory what you say is right... and where feelings are concerned... they probably have equal for Khushi if we dont credit Shyam's obsessiveness of his feeling for her to be more intense than Arnav's not yet intense feelings for Khushi..

but for a discussion it is a moot point... Why we feel differently is it because it has been made clear to us who is supposed to be protagonist and who is antagonist... i guess yes..it is called conditioning isnt it?

But, i guess that is one issue that serial is trying to address without making it a documentary isnt it?

Does being married mean, one can't fall in love with anyone else? And if you do is it wrong?

The answer is no... i would say it is not... it what you choose to do with it is what makes the difference here those choices what makes us determine if that is a bad/wrong choice or a right/good choice!!

Case in point.. - Shyam fell in love..when he first saw her.. - good...
he pursued her ...good
did he reveal his real marital status no... not good..he actually lied to Buaji...even worse

He does not want to leave Anjali... for her money is important to him and does not want to leave Khushi for "she" has become important to him.

so the choices he made of not coming clean... he could have said, i am married but i have fallen in love with you and i want to make you mine...i would applaud. And say way to go...Shyamu...but no he is lying, scheming..to achieve Khushi not win her...

so i guess i made my clear why i would feel what he is doing is wrong..why his feelings are not justified..

Now lets move to Arnav...

he is committed to a relationship, the best he knows... He has so far not done anything that be classified as being unfaithful even mentally..for he questions her thoughts..does not welcome them unlike Shyam who had even imagined Khushi when hugging his wife...(yuck)

now he says if he falls in love he will stay away from her..and he tries to stay away from her..does he not...

his relationship with la is not unknown to Khushi, it is out there in the open..

he is falling in love with Khushi but he has not even acknowledged it..yet..Shyamu has... said i will ensure that i achieve you Khushi...

so again a difference..there... he is changing...slowly..but he has not done anything..that would make one feel... how disgusting..while he claims to love one..girl he is pawing the other one..

Shyam i felt was doing that today when he put his hand on her..

Now you would say Arnav holds Khushi too but it is not with the intention of wanting her..he leaves her..when she looks at his hand on her...even today he let go...
he has been there to help her..when she is falling,  fainting, bumping into him, he is not scheming these meeting..is her..

need i say more??
Posted: 12 years ago

Was just waiting for vrush to comment
both posts are great!
Posted: 12 years ago
Mariam

do you see i am going mad!!


Posted: 12 years ago

Haha yeah vrush
your looking at all possibilities!
Posted: 12 years ago
I think the reason for this bias is that Shyam is going behind his wife's back and living a double life to seduce Khushi

Meanwhile Arnav is what he is. There is no pretenses there.
Really, he has no relationship with Khushi. He remains faithful to Lavanya. He is not lying to her, hiding things from her, or going behind her back in any way.
What encounters he has with Khushi are accidental

However, Shyam lies to Anjali every day, and even he knows he has his bad lusty sights fixated on Khushi

Also, I think the audience favour one over the other is because Shyam has nothing but bad intentions. Every single move is calculated.  Meanwhile Arnav seems to have a conscience. It makes his character redeemable

Yuks
Posted: 12 years ago
Nice post!πŸ‘
 
I think the primary difference between Arnav and Shyam is not because of their feelings regarding Khushi, rather because of their own characters! (Or rather the characters that the creative team has given to them!)
 
Arnav is rude, cold, snooty and even cruel at times...but he is essentially a decent, straight-forward and principled man, who has a soft side to him, which he purposefully chooses not to display. Arnav genuinly cares about the people in his life, yet he doesn't make a huge show and tell about it!
 
Meanwhile, Shyam is a bogus and a phony all through! Whatever he does is out of an ulterior motive...he is cheating on an innocent wife, he is preying on an unsuspecting girl and he is trying to make her life miserable in the name of love! Shyam cares for nothing except his own desires, yet is always pretending to be Mr. Goody-two-shoes!
 
Hence, as an audience, the sympathy directly goes to a man who has a character (Arnav) rather than a back-stabber (Shyam).
 
What they both feel about Kushi is a direct result of their own characters...Shyam's feelings border on obsession and lust, while Arnav's (yet undeveloped feelings) are genuine and heart-felt.
Edited by poppy2009 - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Great post and awesome POVs by every body!!! I just wanted to add one teensy weensy thing though:

The show is called Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon? And Shyam has given his relationship with Anjali a name which is socially accepted and approved by every body and has it's rights and obligations outlined for every one to know. This makes Shyams obsession with another woman with whom he has a relationship if a friend (a very grey relationship with no specific outlines) is unacceptable.

Arnav on the other hand not only doesn't recognize any other relationship other than his sisters as important he doesn't want to name it to make it important or inconvenient for his life style. Therefore it is easier for us to see him falling for some one other than La (as sad as that is for her) because they have a relationship which the law doesn't recognize and isn't binding nor does it have any clear outlines.

What I'm trying to say is if u don't give ur relationship a name it is easy to get out of and people to question and Judge u by it. But if u take the big step of giving it a name u are taking on the responsibility to be answerable for that relationship and everything u do with it. It's like u have a bas***d child and if u don't name him u have no obligation to him buy if u take the hard step of doing so u will always be responsible for him... Am I making any sense???
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by minimuffin86


Great post and awesome POVs by every body!!! I just wanted to add one teensy weensy thing though:

The show is called Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon? And Shyam has given his relationship with Anjali a name which is socially accepted and approved by every body and has it's rights and obligations outlined for every one to know. This makes Shyams obsession with another woman with whom he has a relationship if a friend (a very grey relationship with no specific outlines) is unacceptable.

Arnav on the other hand not only doesn't recognize any other relationship other than his sisters as important he doesn't want to name it to make it important or inconvenient for his life style. Therefore it is easier for us to see him falling for some one other than La (as sad as that is for her) because they have a relationship which the law doesn't recognize and isn't binding nor does it have any clear outlines.

What I'm trying to say is if u don't give ur relationship a name it is easy to get out of and people to question and Judge u by it. But if u take the big step of giving it a name u are taking on the responsibility to be answerable for that relationship and everything u do with it. It's like u have a bas***d child and if u don't name him u have no obligation to him buy if u take the hard step of doing so u will always be responsible for him... Am I making any sense???
@mini..Totally!! Putting live-in & wedlock at par dilutes the sanctity of marraige.There is no status called as 'almost married'.There cannot be any ad hocism in a contract like marraige.
If its easty to change one partner for another,where's the incentve to develop a staying power in a relationship.The debate can never end,  Live-in is easy to establish for many reasons , a strong one is physical pleasure without any commitments,space,choice,personal responsibility  does not legally commit and dissolve easily if not smoothly.
The pros and cons of both arrangements have always been before us, it is just that we do not fear the consequences any more. For those who believe it's a cultural violation it would never gain respect and for those who are moving with the times, "It is part of life and it's ever changing face!!"
Like it's said, "Nothing is right or wrong: Thinking makes it so", if you feel you can't handle the responsibility, the apparent monotonous tone of married life and you need space, freedom, you may live-in; you might not be welcome but you won't be renounced either. And the debate of which is a better deal, still continues.
I am a woman of old thoughts many may  say, still believe in the sanctity of marraige.And love the commitment , enjoy the stability and adore the responsibility.
OOps!! here my rambling goes...sorry  ppl to bore u to death and not even mentioning once about Arnav..cpoming bck to the world of Arnav and his bedroom eyes...AAH!!!
Shayam is a creep as many lovely ladies have already mentioned, that he is not commiting to a relationship with clarity and truth whether its Khushi or Anjali... he has to come out straight, whereas Arnav is clear from the beginning about his stance on marraige, and when he would finally & fully love Khushi then I am sure he would come clear with Lav, and for all u knw, La will suddenly get her brains back and realise herself coz rt now she is pea-brained.HEHHE.
 
@Angelina...Amazing Post.Enjoying the thought process from the lovelies.


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