Okay Here Is A LiL Hint 😊
Lets Say Intro !
May be PROLOUGE :)
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She took a deep breath, closed her eyes tight, and let a tear drop from her eyelids. The flashback of evything played a mix feeling in her tummies. Sometimes she had this weird butterflies flying, sometimes she had this sharp pain in the pit of her stomach. She wiped the tears away but she knew Tears may be dried up, but the heart-never. She slowly stood up, took a pic of HIM from her cupboard and took a pen and her notebook . With A Lot of Courage She started writing . It wasn't just a casual stuff, but her Feelings. Her Feelings She felt for HIM !
DEAR YOU!
You are my one weakness. Others can do or say the same things to me, but its your voice and your charm that I can't escape. Just hearing you say my name can lift me up. I hate that you can do this. I hate that I become mush around you .I didn't knew before that you were the type I should stay away from. You were the bad boy. The one who never gave his heart away, just pretended as if he did & he cared. I knew if I'd fall for you , I'd be done for. Unable to break free. Now here I am, stuck.
It is as if you are perfection in my eyes. I know in my head you'r not. I can list the things I shouldn't like, the things that make you all wrong. You are a liar, a cheat, a con. You had a girlfriend. That girl I'v talked with her. I try to be nice but it makes me sick to know that you r d one for me. If even in a moment, I was your escape from some sweet innocent girl. If it were my choice, my fictional story, I would paint her as some wh**e, some undeserving s**t of a nobel prince, but when I talk to her, It becomes the opposite. I am the liar, I am the wh**e, I cheat and steal from her, from the honest girl who deserves better than you. Than the stupid shit I am chasing after. There is not one thing that I can say makes us right for each other, but that can't stop the way I feel. My heart is broken, but ii can't even place blame with you because it was never intentional. You never asked me to love you. But you did tell me that you never wanted to be with someone before they got to be with someone who loved them, and here ii am. Because you were never mine. You hurt me without even knowing I cared.
Talking with you makes my heart jump and race, but once I realize it was just a fling, a nothing, a non-something between us, it shatters again. I am happy but depressed, I am excited but miserable. When you first smiled at me my heart skipped a beat. It felt like a thunderstorm inside my heart. I had never felt like that before.Your presence makes me crazy. I become someone I never wanted to be. I become that girl begging for you to see me in a new light, for you to care that I am there just as much as I care that you are. I hate that girl. With other guys, I can just snap myself out of it, catch myself in what I am doing and become me again, the confident girl with a shielded heart, but I can't stop it when its YOU. But you just broke me into pieces , God, this makes me desperate. This makes me needy and sick. I can scream at myself over and over again? What are you doing, you look pathetic, he loves someone else, you are just friends, now not even friends , stop caring for him . But these internal warnings mean nothing. It's like an addiction. I am so good sometimes, I forget you at moments, until someone says something or brings up your name and I am back, craving you. Like some hysterical blindness, I think, maybe if I do this, you will see maybe if I act this way, you will care. I look at other girls and think, how sad, but I know how it feels, I know what it is like to be them. You make me them. I am hysterically blind for you. Moreover , the thing that hurts me the most is we'r not even friends now, ii know you but now its like I knew you , its amazing how we used to talk for hours and now we even don't say HI !
& Now , so easily we turned out to be Familiar Strangers !
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So, Guys This is it :)
Your comments shall give me a hint if i shud continue or not ?
Take Care
-Awantika-
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