Originally posted by: tanthya
Yes, Elle ..People like Amma and very much worse than Amma do exist ...
Very much Possible, here at least Amma has made her intention's clear Thank heaven for small mercies...the at least bit troubles me...and the intentions have only been made clear to P - to everyone else she has upped the game to actually show she has genuinely reformed!
and is overt in her behaviour but in many a real cases ..it will be emotional and psychological abuse , added to that the girls family will be brought into the pic , and share of abuse will be reserved for them too... they have done already albeit in the past - the face blackening for example...
its not just jealousy, it's also fear of losing the favoured position in Son's life , Loss of control over Son and a insecurity that if a DIL is treated with loove, she may climb the ladder to rule the roost..hence keeping her down the pecking order ...Having said that , let us not say that all DIL's are fresh , innocent flowers ..sometimes they can be very cruel too..Any rational person would rest assured that in a loving family, there is always room for more love to be given and taken. If its the Asian mentality we are talking about then its for the elders to open their arms and welcome the new member as much as it is the new member's duty to try and find a niche for themselves in their new family. No room for fear, unless what you care about most is appearances and what society thinks over and above what is best for your family. The fear isn't of losing favour - its nothing more and nothing less than fear of losing control.
Big up the cruel DILs!!!!!π At least no one will try and kill, maim, burn or blacken their face in a rush!!!!
Do I feel sorry for the MILs in such cases - No! What do they say about God only givin you what you can handle????πππΌ So handle it girlfriend!!!
Many a times, it is educated people who will be worse offender's..Again the red herring about education! Such behaviour has no connection with education whatsoever! It has everything to do with having a controlling insecure personality. and actually, the worst offenders are likely to be the ones that had the same issues themselves, much like being bullied early in life can turn you into bully later on...Maybe here is where education is relevant...having enough knowledge to know you have a choice as to how you act towards people and it need not be the same as how you yourself were treated.
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