Originally posted by: _Sanjana23_^^ Anu, I agree that anyone can die at any time and eventually we will too so marriage I guess is important to keep the cycle going.
I think the problem is people area) afraid of the unknown? What will marriage be like?b) afraid of change- if I live with my in-laws x, y,z will happen andc) just don't particularly like change.I am sure people who are open to new things but marriage is a whole new aspect that we need to be mentally, physically and emotionally ready for.. for some it may be at 18 and for others in later life.? So maybe marriage is just right for people at different points in life when only they know yes I am ready to take on whatever comes with marriage and martial life? =)
Originally posted by: nureat01
You can but uptill a point...what happens when your family passes away and you are the only one left?
If we can't count on the permanence of other relationships, we can't on that either...in one way or the other, they all end...but it is us human beings as a species that are coded to look for companionship so that life goes on...Again, I don't say marriage is the only solution but you can't discount the basic human need for companionship either...Generally we all have our families and they are the only ones that love us unconditionally...but one day it all passes away in the cycle of life too...generally speaking...ofcourse anyone can die at any time...there are no guarantees for any age.
Originally posted by: Eventide
By family, I did not just mean the parents. What about siblings? There is a lesser chance of out-living all siblings and their families. But you never know.
It is not the fear of change or being afraid of the unknown in all cases. Personally, I think it is about reasons for staying single and thus priorities. Lets say for example, a girl decides to stay single to help ease the financial burden, after the loss of a father. She may feel lonely occasionally. But would she be ready to let the family go, for the sake of love. Have come across a few such cases in real life. It happens. These women are well into their 50s and 60s now.
Originally posted by: -Fivr-Alright.. So this might be a totally pointless question, but bear with me for a bit. π³π I was just reading this recently posted TOI article and it mentioned Priya being happy-go-lucky and content with her life the way it is! Which is all great, really! But I was just wondering if this is really possible outside of a television show - real wali duniya mein, especially with in the desi community is it possible for a girl OR a guy to be unmarried "past their prime shadi wali umar" and be perfectly happy/content with it? π€
Personally, I don't know if it's really possible. I mean, I don't think k marriage is the end-all-be-all of life and I do think you can live a pretty fulfilling life without getting married. But I also think that our culture (and I may be out-dated in my knowledge here since I haven't been back home in a long while.. π³) usually makes a taboo out of being unmarried past a certain age.. I mean, it might have changed and these may just be isolated incidents but I've heard of way too many "umar nikal jaye gi" and "achey larkey/larkiyan phir nahi milte" and "ab kaun shadi karey ga" type dialogues in social circles with a very sad/dejected connotation.. Jaise it's totally UNNATURAL for someone to be unmarried past a certain age and that we need to "rush" and get married jaldi sey "acha larka/larki" dhoond k because warna "achey larkey/larkiyan milte nahi".. π So really, in a culture that places marriage at such a pedestal (in a good way) it almost seems natural k they'll make a big fuss about getting married on "time".. And give you a bunch of grief (that may eventually rub off on you) for not getting married in your "shadi wali" umar..
However, if you do manage to ignore the immense societal pressures, then I guess there may also be a personal void that you may feel in your life.. To me marriage at the end is about companionship and partnership - about having someone there who you can share your life with, the good and the bad.. And it seems that as you grow older, you seem to be reminded of your loneliness even strongly.. All your friends/relatives get busy in their life and while you may be busy with work and stuff, at the end of the day you come to an empty home/room.. And I think THAT may be a bit harder to tackle or ignore.. It may be something that you'd be able to ignore for the most part or learn do deal with, but I do think k that regret/loneliness would still be there.. Just because we (men and women alike) need companionship - we don't like to be alone (most of us at least.. π). And I do think that while we may be content with our life for the most part, sooner or later the loneliness does catch up with us.. Even if it is just for a moment, as we look at a happy couple sitting on a bench or a mother play with her child or a dad giving "airplane rides" to his son.. We are reminded of what we may be missing out on and in those fleeting moments we can't ignore that strong feeling of regret..
Or at least that's what I think.. π³π
So I guess, then I was wondering if we'd be able to see this "struggle" in Priya's character too? See her trying to find that balance between being content with her life and maybe tackling a few regrets in the process...? I don't want her to be crying din raat because she isn't married - I want her to be living a full life and being happy with it! But maybe, every once in a while she may be reminded of her loneliness..? I mean, I guess I'm just curious to see how Priya's character will be - will she be completed nonchalant about her marital status or will she be the "zindagi sey samjhota kar k - when life gives you lemons, make lemonade" type of girl..? *wonders* π€
*realizes she probably did not make any sense at all there*
Umm.. Sorry for the ramble guys! π³π
Originally posted by: Mru_bee
hahaha.. Anu π
Yes, I know Avantika was a free spirit. But I was talking more in terms of the dialogue.
The dialogue says at one point " Jab tak Aap akele khush nahee reh sakte, tab tak aap kisi aur key saath khush nahi reh saktey" I love this philosophy.
The main argument for marriage mostly is " you shouldn't be alone" , and I agree with the flaky Avantika philosophy of being happy when being alone too ...
-- Mru
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