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Shanti ke Ashant jokes..

set_raj IF-Sizzlerz
set_raj
set_raj

Joined: 15 July 2006
Posts: 19027

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 1:48am | IP Logged
Shanti ki Ashant jokes..Wink
 
Hello friends back with some new jokes on one and only Ashanti kumari and her dimwit daughter Chandalika...I hope you will enjoy reading them...
 
 
1-A guy was on trial for murder and if convicted, would get the death penalty. His brother found out that Ashanti was on the jury and figured she would be the one to bribe. He told  Ashanti that she would be paid Rs.500,000 if she could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to life term.

The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of life imprisonment.

After the trial, the brother went to the Ashanti's home, told her what a great job she had done and paid her the Rs.500,000. 

Ashanti replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to life sentence. They all wanted to let him go.WinkTongue(Gaaj ghire tujhper..beda gark kar diya bechare ka..manhoos maari..LOL)
 
 
2-A Husband Shopping Center has opened where a woman can go to choose from among many men to be her husband. It is laid out in five floors, with the men increasing in positive attributes as you ascended up the floors.
 
There is, however, a catch: Once you open the door to any floor, you must choose a man from that floor, and if you go up a floor, you can't go back down except to exit the building. So, Chandalika goes to the shopping center to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door says:
Floor 1: These men have jobs and love kids. Chandalika reads the sign. "Well that's better than not having jobs, or not loving kids, but I wonder what's further up?"
 
So up she goes. The second floor sign says: Floor 2: These men have high paying jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking. "Hmmm, better" say the Chandalika "But, I wonder what's further up?"
 
The third floor sign reads: Floor 3: These men have high paying jobs, are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the housework. "Wow," says the Chandalika, "very tempting BUT, there's more further up!" And so again, she goes up.
 
On the fourth floor, the sign reads: Floor 4: These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak. "Oh, mercy me, but just think what must be awaiting me further on?!" So up to the fifth floor she goes.
 
The sign on that door says:-

Floor 5: This floor is just to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping and have a nice day.WinkTongueLOL

Aur iss tarah bechari Chandalika Kunwari hi rah gayi...Wink

 
 
3-Mansa was returning home after performing the last rites of Ashanti, all of a sudden there was lightning and thunder in the sky and it started raining heavily.

Mansa sadly look up in the sky and said,''Thanks, i think she has reached there''.(lagta hai ki pahunch gayi..haan gaaj ghir gayi ooperwalon per)...LOLLOL

 
4--Mansa ek Sadhu se bola:-
meri biwi Shanti  bahut pareshan karti hai, ghar mein ashanti karti hai, koi upay batao.
sadhu bola, saale upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?..LOL(haan Mansa abh tum bhi jaldi sadhu ban jaao...yeh toh Durbhagya laxmi hai..jo sirf Ashanti degi..)Wink
 
 
5-Mansa to Ashanti:-Last night i dreamt that i was talking with God and i told him that i have a wife like you (Ashanti)...
Ashanti:- acha toh fir kya kaha Bhagwan jee nee.?Smile
Mansa:-He smiled and said,''beta! yeh sab pichley Janam ke paap hain..LOL
(Aur gaaj ghire tum per ashanti..yeh tere punya hai pichley janam ki jo mansa jaisa pati mila hai..LOL)
 
Thank you..
 
Keep Smiling..Big smile
 
Set_raj...Big smile
 
 


Edited by set_raj - 25 May 2011 at 1:56am

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pretty89baas-tvIBICENika07vinianilchymanju7Mandissaavina_radev48RADEV1000anusha34radhika5radha_bilahariChinadollTwoShivanee31-Anks-..yajnaseni..sigridbholabearYourNightmare--Ekta--anu17kinu17nycsweetiePutijaChalhov..sush..Roshini1494-Swetha-

YourNightmare IF-Rockerz
YourNightmare
YourNightmare

Joined: 18 August 2010
Posts: 6287

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 2:03am | IP Logged
Wonderful jokes raj bhaiya specially that shopping one and al last when she see this
The sign on that door says:-

Floor 5: This floor is just to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping and have a nice day.

I was laughing whole heartedly when chandalika sees this on floor 5 really amazing jokes

Your posts are really refreshing

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--Ekta--set_raj..sush..

radhika5 Goldie
radhika5
radhika5

Joined: 06 December 2009
Posts: 2125

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 2:28am | IP Logged
Thank you for this absolutely hilarious postsROFL--

Each of them are priceless...
GD ki kavita aur Ashanti ke jokes ko lekar, you keep us all smiling...ClapClap

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--Ekta--set_raj..sush..

Shivanee31 Goldie
Shivanee31
Shivanee31

Joined: 20 November 2006
Posts: 2261

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 3:08am | IP Logged
Awesome...Very nice and funny jokes.Thanx for sharing

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set_raj

RADEV1000 Goldie
RADEV1000
RADEV1000

Joined: 14 March 2010
Posts: 1762

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 3:26am | IP Logged
Hehehehhe!!...very nice bhaiya ...u always helps us to laugh n to keep stress free...very nice...

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set_raj

ChinadollTwo Goldie
ChinadollTwo
ChinadollTwo

Joined: 27 November 2009
Posts: 1892

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 3:36am | IP Logged
Setraj - You should join a Comedy Club with your "joke telling" talent... You are hilarious ROFL ROFL ROFL

I especially liked the third and fifth ones. As for "husband shopping" I wanted the sign on the fifth floor to read "Greed will get you nowhere... You are now stuck in this building with NO WAY OUT"

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set_raj

PutijaChalhov IF-Sizzlerz
PutijaChalhov
PutijaChalhov

Joined: 21 October 2009
Posts: 21719

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 3:42am | IP Logged
LOLLOLROFL
humourous post RBGThumbs Up
 
Ashanti replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to life sentence. They all wanted to let him go.WinkTongue(Gaaj ghire tujhper..beda gark kar diya bechare ka..manhoos maari..LOL)
 
sadhu bola, saale upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?..
all good onesLOL


Edited by chalhov - 25 May 2011 at 3:44am

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set_raj..sush..

chymanju7 Senior Member
chymanju7
chymanju7

Joined: 11 July 2010
Posts: 969

Posted: 25 May 2011 at 3:47am | IP Logged
nice jokesClapLOLBig smile...                                                                                                4--Mansa ek Sadhu se bola:-
meri biwi Shanti  bahut pareshan karti hai, ghar mein ashanti karti hai, koi upay batao.
sadhu bola, saale upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?..LOL(haan Mansa abh tum bhi jaldi sadhu ban jaao...yeh toh Durbhagya laxmi hai..jo sirf Ashanti degi..)Wink
...ab bechara mansa ko weaver ke jaga sadhu baba banna padega apni ashanti biwi ko shanti karne ke liye

3-Mansa was returning home after performing the last rites of Ashanti, all of a sudden there was lightning and thunder in the sky and it started raining heavily.

Mansa sadly look up in the sky and said,''Thanks, i think she has reached there''.(lagta hai ki pahunch gayi..haan gaaj ghir gayi ooperwalon per)...LOLLOL

omg...upar jaakar bhi ashanti ne uparwaalo ki shanti bhaang karna shuru kardiya...hilarious postLOLBig smile



Edited by chymanju7 - 25 May 2011 at 3:49am

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set_raj

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