24/5/11
KESAR-GULAAL MOMENT
Kesar stopped Gulaal from asking him anything further as he wanted to ask her before she influences his thoughts. He was totally vulnerable when he said "wohi sawaal joh mujhe chain se jeene nahi deta". Kesar turns the plate over her saying she forced him to come this far for her accusation that "baat yehan tak pahunch gayi hai toh".
Again he is so tongue-tied but when she insists, he opens up to her. He craves for her attention and he revealed to her in not so many words that he craves for the same love and affection that he was used to. Painfully he questions her that if it was not meant to be (here he says about their worlds or priorities being different), why is he not able to take her off his mind?? An unfortunate situation where he asks her that if he was not bound to receive her love and affection and their life have to be different in their own way, why is it that he is still bound to her. It moved her soul; I should say that she too cries with him. He was not realizing how firm his grip was on her that she had to remind him that he is hurting her. The minute he realizes, he let go off her and also takes her advice to go away from her room being so late at night.
That was a realization moment for Gulaal. She also seems helpless but this is what she had been advised by almost all of them. Then when it came to handling things practically, why is she so overwhelmed. She knew about everyone's worry that Kesar would grow up to find his own meanings about their relationship. She should have been prepared for it. Or probably she was so confident about the child she once knew and admits that she does not know his individuality now.
KESAR AND MOTABHA
The picturisation is just superb and fantastic. It has a scenic beauty the way it has been shot. The vast terrace, the moonlight, the far-reaching lights from the streets, the night atmosphere, the sound of the insects, everything was perfect. It was a heart-rending father-son moment. A lonely Kesar was lost in his own world of music playing the mouth organ, trying to find some solace to his bruised heart. A lonely father unable to head the worldly pressures anymore looks for support from his son.
Though the scene was beautiful, I do not appreciate Motabha who failed to recognize his own son's agony, not for a while thinking why a youngster seems to be sitting alone in the terrace so late at night, playing the mouth organ.
Kesar is lost in his worries though he is playing the tune. His past and the present situation haunts and hounds him. The aggravating tension within him is reflected in the speed with which he handled the string.
Neil's performance of a drunken Kesar trying his best not to reveal his drunken state to his father was a marvelous rendition. The sudden noise startles Kesar. There was a relief on his face as his father stood away from him looking into the streets. The intoxication was getting the better of him. He alerts himself to his dad's first call scared all of a sudden. Perfect scene to give us a feel that he is consciously trying to remain conscious as his name was called out. To avoid talking he manages a "Hmm" for an answer which was the best way out. Guilty that he was, he kept assuring himself every now and then that his dad stood far away. The fear in getting caught was reflected so well in his eyes. He gave in to his dad's demand and played the tune for him. He was helpless, he had to. But soon enough he discontinued playing it.
When his dad knelt down to be seated next to him, Kesar cupped his mouth with his hand as he did not want to be noticed in an inebriated state. The intoxication and exhaustion made his eyes close and droop down but he was suddenly startled when his dad caressed his head. With hand cupping his mouth, eyes red and tearful, the look away to a different direction showing fear of getting caught, Neil's rendition was totally flawless.
Kesar was totally helpless when he could neither refuse his dad for playing his favorite childhood tune nor did he have the energy and strength to continue playing it. He stopped by to listen to his dad's words. On one side his dad was getting philosophical about life and journey and here Kesar was struggling to come to terms with the realities of life.
The irony of the situation is that a father came to seek moral support from his son but failed to give his son some emotional support that he right now needed badly in life.
Kesar shying away from revealing his drunken state was more out of the realization how hurt his dad would feel rather than anything else. Kesar struggled to keep himself alert and awake against the spell of alcohol. Still tears flowed down his eyes as he heard his dad mention "Toot chukka hoon". The slow movement of his eyes to both directions, the drooping eyelids, the partly uncoordinated gait with a periodic shift from nodding off to consciously trying to be alert, maintaining a safe distance from his dad; Kesar tried his best to avoid hurting his dad. This is one of the best examples of emoting without exaggeration. Yesterday, I was a little disappointed in the scene where I did not get to see Neil showing Kesar's reaction to the burning sensation of raw undiluted alcohol. This scene today has literally made me forget that part yesterday.
Kesar was quick to agree to his dad's suggestion that they should sleep now. Motabha sought physical support from his son. He tried to help but his gait and exhaustion exceeded and surpassed all his efforts to keep the fact undisclosed. He stood up and stood leaning against a wall trying to appear strong and steady in front of him. Kesar realized it was futile to even defend himself from the mistake for which he was feeling guilty in front of his dad. But that realization gives him the courage to advise his dad to go and sleep. When his dad took his face towards him and said he was feeling ashamed, there was hurtful resignation after which he surrendered totally to the intoxication and fell to the ground.
KESAR AND JAMNAKAKI
Kesar was partly frightened and scared to be waking up to Jamna Kaaki's wicked looks concealed in a smile. His slight hope that Gulaal would be the one to give him the blanket was totally squashed by JK. That disappointment along with JK's continued talking led to irritation, a little confusion and finally set him thinking. Kesar gets so influenced by everyone's talks, Raman, JK, his dad, even Talli when it is about Gulaal.
KESAR AND TALLI
Started with annoyance at Talli, but we could see Kesar's slight softening seeing the flowers, a little tolerance seeing her realization, a slight apology when she reminded about being left midway. But Talli's over-indulgence in his affairs blew his temper especially when she told about "farz"/duty. If even after this, she continues to hound him, no more sympathies for her.
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