Fan Fictions


Fan Fictions
Fan Fictions

FF: Chupanke Ki Saaza Last Part Pg 52 [Jul 7,'12] (Page 34)

-Archi- Goldie

Joined: 07 June 2006
Posts: 1181

Posted: 19 April 2012 at 9:49pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by sowmya18

omg!!!!that was great...u penned it so beautifully...

Thanks sowmya! Im glad it turned out good, cuz writing Jai's anguish was seriously a challenge! Big smile

Originally posted by archita_59

I loved how it was from jai's POV! We finally get wht he feels without bani's wrong interpretation of his actions! 
Thanks for the lovely update!
Good luck for ur exams!

My pleasure! Thanks for the comment! Tongue

Originally posted by Anjinie

Loved it that is wat i was waiting for was Jai's reaction . I has no words explain this update. I would not mind more of Jai's jealous,,, beautiful waiting next part

Thanks hun! im seriously amazed to see people like it - it made my day! Big smile

Originally posted by zarlish18

Winkit was justtt  AMAZINGGG


Thank you! And yes, Jai's brain began working again... it took a temporary vacation in the last few parts! LOLWink

-Archi- Goldie

Joined: 07 June 2006
Posts: 1181

Posted: 19 April 2012 at 10:02pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by starrystar

Seems like my comment disappeared, never mind.

Archi thanks for the pm. What is bani upto.
OMG what a sexy dress, love the color.
good jai regretting.. but really these two should stop playing around and admitt their feelings..
But then we shouldn't forget that bani wanted a divorce so i do get jai wanting to make bani jealous.
Good luck with your exams

First of all, welcome to the FF! Hug
Yes, i was super excited to pick out her dress... wasted soo much time surfing through the internet! WinkLOL And this whole cat and mouse game is gonna finish soon, i promise! Big smile Thanks for the comment!

Originally posted by Coldpies

Thanks for the PM Archie. Really appreciate you updating specially during your exams.

Update was worth waiting for. Bani you go girl show Jai what he is missing out on. Next part should be interesting with the dress and all and i am sure Neil will have an appearance as well.

Good luck with ur exams and hoping for a really long update once they are done.


Thanks Coldpies! I couldn't resist updating... you guys honestly make me want to write! Big smile
Yes, Neil will definitely make an appearance (good guess!Wink). I will be posting the next part soon! Big smile

Originally posted by neethurose

Amazing update. Waiting eagerly for part. Hope these two clear their misunderstandings soon

Thank hun! Big smile Yes, misunderstandings will be cleared... Wink

Originally posted by Proud-BrownGirl


P.S. every chapter is a fav. Big smile

Aww! Thanks soo much! Big smile Im soo happy you like it! 

Originally posted by Ezther

Welcome back sweety!!!!!I trust the exams were fine and you will do just great.

I love what you did with the part.Would have loved Jai to suffer a bit but well...I'm not the writer.
just keep it coming dearie...cos we're itching to read more!Thumbs Up

Haha... i missed you guys soo much! Exams were torturous, but i guess you can't expect better! OuchLOL
With Jai... im kinda conflicted. I feel soo bad for the poor guy that i can't even get myself to make him suffer. Im kinda biased that way! But no worries, things are gonna clear up soon! Big smile
Thanks for commenting!

sowmya18 Goldie

Joined: 04 June 2010
Posts: 1919

Posted: 20 April 2012 at 12:07am | IP Logged
are u updating now...plss update na...

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:


-Archi- Goldie

Joined: 07 June 2006
Posts: 1181

Posted: 20 April 2012 at 4:07pm | IP Logged
Main aa gayii! LOL
My exams are almost done, and I just woke up after sleeping for twelve hours straight. So I thought I should treat you guys for putting up with me!

Recap: The Walia's arrange a party, in which Bani in order to impress her hubby, makes a dramatic appearance in a pink dress. This of course, was planned and orchestrated by Rano and Lakshmi, who try everything and anything to make the couple clear their misunderstandings and get back together. Note: Except for the parents of Jai and Bani, no one else knows what happened between the duo (Pia, Bani's elder sister, committed suicide because of Jai!). 

I also made a family tree, because there are a lot of characters in this story, and most of them make an appearance here.

Chupanke Ki Saaza
-PART 21-
Mrs. Jai Walia

"Kitni achi lag rahi hai na?" Lakshmi said, watching the graceful figure of Bani approaching them.
 "Haan! Aur saab sirf usko dekh rahe hai!" Rano replied.
 "And did you see Jai's face?"
Rano nodded, ecstatic. "But I thought he would come and talk to her though… magar woh hai ki abhi bhi usske boring clients se baath kar raha hai!"
"Don't worry," Lakhmi assured. "Just give it some time! You can tell he is dying to talk to her!"
Ranveer, who was listening to conversation silently decided to step in. "You guys are purposefully doing this?"
"Doing what?" Lakshmi fired right away. "Giving him a taste of his own medicine?"
"Just look at him," Ranveer said, nodding to an anxious Jai glancing constantly in Bani's direction, who now appeared to be in a conversation with Neil. "Don't you think he had enough to deal with without adding this as well?"
"Excuse me," Lakshmi answered. "Jai was the one who started it! We are just playing our part…"
"Par Rano," Ranveer said, turning to his wife. He found putting any sense into Lakshmi was pointless! There was only one man who could that (her husband, if you are wondering!) and right now he was no where to help him! "Tum khud kehthi ho na Jai kitna tadap tha hai, toh phir yeh saab karne ki kya zaroorat hai?"
Rano took Ranveer's hand and patted it. "Veer, hum saab jaanthe hai Jai Bani ko kitna pyaar kartha hai. This is just to spice things up!"
"Waise bhi," Lakshmi added. "When Jai could make Bani jealous with that stupid Annie, toh Bani ka bhi pura haaq bantha hai yeh saab karne ke liye. And it WORKED!"
 "Toh aap dono mere bhai ko taang karna nahi band karoge?"
Rano rolled her eyes. "Stop it Veer! Tumhara bhai Bani ko bahut rula chuka hai. Aab uski bari hai!"
Ranveer just sighed and walked away, not at all wanting to get involved. He was very glad he was past the 'jealousy' stage in his love story.
Lakhsmi sighed as she watched him go. "I thought, after being in love with you for soo long, he would finally understand, but…"
 "But he is just as straightforward as ever," Rano finished. "
Lakshmi laughed as she saw Rano shake her head hopelessly.  "Well atleast you know he loves you!"
"Haan," Rano said fondly. "Magar aab meri dumbo devar ki bhaari! He better confess to Bani today!"
"Chill! Just look at him," Lakshmi answered, nodding in Jai's direction. "Ever since that guy started talking to Bani, Jai is only looking at her!"
Rano seemed to catch on. "I think that's Neil… Veer keh raha tha ki woh aur Bani bahut ache dost hai."
A vicious smile spread across Lakshmi's face. "Is that so?" she said, as if she hit a jackpot!
"I don't like that look," Rano commented with a grin.
"Oh just you wait!" Lakshmi said, beckoning a waiter. 
* * *
"Why are you looking at me like that?" Bani asked for the umpteenth time in the last five minutes.
But Neil, shook his head, again. "Nothing…"
"Do I look bad?" Bani said, fixing her curls.
"You look anything but bad…"
Bani caught the double meaning. "Oh ho! Kya baath hai? Aaj Mr. Desai flirt kar rahe hai?"
Neil coloured upon hearing the word 'flirt', making Bani laugh. Sometimes Neil acted like a twelve year old!
"Why are you laughing?" he asked.
But before Bani could answer, a waiter bumped into her, making her stumble and grab onto Neil for support.
"Are you okay?" he asked, catching her waist, while she found balance.
"Yeah, thanks," she answered, turning around to bash the waiter, only to find him gone. "Where did he go?"
"I don't know. He didn't even say sorry…"
"I know! And I told them to be on their best behaviour today!" Bani sighed. "Anyway, are you having fun?"
"Yeah," Neil said. "Good job on the planning… its really nice."
Bani took a bow. "Thank you!"
Neil smiled nervously as he continued looking at Bani, wishing he could just say the words that formed in his mouth alright, but refused to come out. "Umm… Bani?"
He shakily held out his hand. "May I h-have…"
"Why are you getting so nervous?" Bani asked, noting his pale colour. "Just spit it out!"
"M-may I have this dance with y-you?"
Bani was a bit surprised to see Neil. Being shy in nature, she could tell he was super nervous about asking her. But she couldn't help but be touched by his gentlemen behaviour! However, before she could answer, Jai joined the conversation out of no where.
"Neil," he said in a booming voice. "How are you?"
Neil quickly withdrew his hand. "Im good Mr. Walia," he said politely. "And you?"
"Fantastic," Jai replied, confidently. "Do you like the party?"
"Yes," Neil said. "Its arranged beautifully."
"It is," Jai agreed. "And all thanks to my wife!"
Neil was stumped with Jai's answer. "W-wife?" he finally said after a few moments. "But… but I thought B-Bani organized it."
"Haan," Jai said, wrapping his arm protectively around Bani's waist. "Bani hi toh hai, meri wife!"
Silence. There weren't words to describe Neil's mortification. He glanced at Bani, waiting for confirmation, waiting for her to deny the news, but she only looked at Jai in what appeared to be surprise. And that's when Neil wished he could disappear from the spot.
"Now will you excuse us," Jai said, satisfied to see the look on Neil's face. "Enjoy the party!"
And with that he steered Bani away and was quickly leading her to the dance floor.
"What the hell was that?" she fired as soon as they were out of earshot.
Jai pulled her close, and began swaying to the music. "I should be asking you that!"
"Me?!" she answered, her hands automatically wrapping around his neck. "Why would you tell Neil? Poor guy! He looked like he was about to kill himself!"
"Well, he should have thought about that before touching you!"
Bani appeared confused. "When did he touch…" she trailed off, remembering how Neil's arms went for her waist when she lost balance.
"Exactly," Jai said.
It was then that Bani realized where she was. They were in the middle of a crowded dance floor, where they were both pressed right up against each other. She was hit with a wave of dj vu, when she remembered this was exactly how they shared their first kiss.  
"Why do you care?" she asked, looking up into his muddy brown eyes, trying to divert her mind from that memory.  "I thought we weren't going to pretend to be married in the office…"
"I don't like that Neil anywhere near you!"
"Kyun?" she continued. "Jab tum Annie ke saath rehthe ho, usske saath flirt karthe ho, tab main kuch nahi kehthi!"
"So, you have no right to interfere with me and Neil either!"
"Well, I am not as matured as you then!" he said simply. "Kyunki mujhe farak padtha hai."
Her heart soared at finally hearing those words. A smile spread across her face as she continued to watch him, enjoying every moment, savouring it like a child eating chocolate! It was after a couple of minutes that she noticed Rano and Lakshmi waving, beckoning her to join them. However, when she tried to go, the arms around her waist tightened.
"What?" she asked.
"Where are you going?"
"Rano aur Lakshmi mujhe bula rahe hai!" she replied, nodding in their direction.
"Yeah, no."
"I am not letting you out of my sight today."
"Jai," Bani said, not seeing logic. "Let me go."
"So that Neil can have another chance?!"
Bani rolled her eyes and tried to push his arms off. But he only ended up pulling her closer (if that was possible!) and now, their faces were only inches apart.
Jai looked deep into her eyes and somehow, that one stare seemed to blow all her inhibitions away. She melted in his arms, letting him pull her to the tunes of the music, which she no longer heard. It was just his face that occupied her, nothing else.
"One would think after drawing my face so many times," he said quietly. "You would stop watching me."
A small blush crept up to her cheeks. "You went through my sketches?"
"A bit," he answered.
Bani didn't know why, but she liked the fact that he looked. The fact that he still held some interest in her hobbies brought immense happiness. "Don't you want to know why?"
Jai smiled. "I know why."
She didn't press for an answer, and they once again fell into silence. Bani didn't care if he knew the right reason or not, because she did. After lying awake for hours last night, she finally accepted what her heart was trying to tell her for a long time; she didn't hate him.
And it was not because he igorned her or because he made her jealous with his secretary, but because he was the reason she still breathed. So, how can anyone hate the reason behind their existence?
They can't. And neither can she.
But does that change anything? She didn't know, because the truth still remains that he killed her sister, or atleast was a reason for her death.
So for now, she just embraced the two truths of her life and decided to go with the one that gave her the least pain, hoping that when the times comes for her to choose, she would be able to. For now, she was content with being Mrs. Jai Walia, because no matter how angry she was (for the emotion was still very much there), nothing gave her more pleasure than being with him.
* * *
Krishna walked up to Rano and pulled her into a hug.
"Kya hua Kaaki?" Rano said, with a smile. "Aap itni khush kyun hai?"
"Good job beta," Krishna said, kissing her forhead. "Bani aaj bahut achi lag rahi hai!"
Rano took a bow. "Thank you!" She then turned to Ranveer, who was grumpily standing beside her and said, "Dekha? Aab toh mujhe appreciate karo!"
Ranveer merely shrugged.
"Kya hua?" Krishna said, watching the duo.
"Kuch nahi Kaaki," Rano explained. "Aapka beta mujhse gussa hai… kyunki maine isske ladle bhai ko takleef dene ki jurat ki!"
Krishna laughed and patted Ranveer's shoulder. "Lekin woh saahi thi! Just look at them… dono ek dusre ka saath nahi chood rehe hain!"
Ranveer's irritation vanished at that comment. He, like everyone of the Walia's, did not fail to notice the happiness visible on Jai's face. But he also suspected enough about Jai and Bani relationship, to know that it was going to be short-lived. Despite not knowing what exactly went wrong between the couple, Ranveer still supported his brother.
He was the only one in the entire family, who knew that Jai didn't love Pia, back when their marriage was arranged. Though he tried to convince Jai to call of the loveless engagement,  Jai would always reply the same – "I can't hurt Dad." And from that day on, he trusted his brother, because he knew whatever he did, there was a reason for it. So, even today, when he was being accused of flirting with his P.A., he knew that there was a motive behind it and did not approve of Rano and Lakshmi pouncing on him.
"Waise Rano," Krishna said. "Lakshmi kahan hai? Yeh saab zaroor ussi ne kiya hoga!"
"Haan Kaaki," Rano replied. "She came up with the dress… I was aiming for a saari, magar you know Lakshmi…"
"Bechara Tarun," Ranveer commented. "I wonder how he puts up with her!"
"Veer!" Rano admonished, causing Krishna to laugh and leave the couple alone.
"Main saach toh keh raha hoon," Ranveer defended. "Lakshmi has the weirdest and craziest ideas ever!"
"So do I! So, tum bhi mere baare mein aisa hi sooch the ho?"
Ranveer's expression softened considerably. "Of course not!" he said, pulling her into a hug.
Rano giggled. Her ways to 'manaofy' her hubby never failed. He was the most straightforward person ever!
"Waise," Ranveer said, checking his watch. "its 10 o'clock. You should go to bed!"
Rano jerked out of his arms. "What?!"
Ranveer, who was expecting this reaction, merely took her hand and said soothingly, "The doctor told you not to exert yourself! You have been standing for three hours now!"
"But I'm fine!" she protested. "Seriously!"
"Haan," he said, not believeing a word of it. "Magar tumhe aaram karna chahiye! You carrying eight kgs!"
Rano rolled her eyes. "Jab mujhe problem nahi hai, toh-"
He silenced her with a finger on her lips. "Magar mujhe hai," he said quietly. "I can't see you in  pain, of any kind."
Rano didn't argue, understanding the expression in his eyes. She learned enough in the last eight months to tell that Ranveer would put with any of her excuses, no matter how lame, except for the ones with her pregnancy. So, she quietly let him lead her out of the hall.
"Mujhe ice cream chahiye," she said, stopping at the foot of the stairs, which lead to the bedrooms.
"Haan," Rano said, with a grin. "Baby ko bhook lag rahi hai!"
Ranveer rolled her eyes. "Agar tumhe chahiye toh, saaf saaf kehdona, Gudiya par blame mat dalo!"
Rano pretended to sniff. "Toh tumhe apni gudiya ki padi hai… meri nahi!"
"Acha teek hai meri maa," he answered, with a smile. "Chalo!"
"Aab ice cream yahan khud chal kar to nahi aa saktha na. Kitchen tak jaana padega!"
Rano frowned. "So you are going to make me walk to the kitchen, carrying eight kgs?!"
He stared incredulously at her. "You were fine till a minute ago!"
Rano just shrugged in response.
So, with a sigh, Ranveer lifted her in his arms and began walking towards the kitchen. "I swear," He said. "Sometimes I feel like you want to make my life difficult!"
Rano grinned sheepishly. "Hormones baby… im eight months pregnant."
"No, you are just being lazy!"
* * *
"Taruuunnn!" Lakhmi said. "Chalo dance karthe hai."
"Abhi nahi," he replied, continuing to type away on his phone.
Lakshmi grumbled something incoherent, causing Tarun to smile and finally look at his wife.
"Tum party mein mere liye aaye ho ya tumhare phone ke liye?"
Tarun wrapped his arm around her and answered, "Tum party mein Bani ke liye aayi ho ya phir mere liye?"
Lakshmi narrowed her eyes. "Don't act smart with me mister!"
Tarun merely grinned. "Waise Bani hai kahan… with all that hungama yesterday, I thought she would be a bit more noticeable!"
"She is noticeable," Lakshmi said, turning towards Jai and Bani's direction. "Just look at her… the hair, the dress…"
"Acha?" Tarun said, seriously, not taking his eyes of his wife. "But next to you she blends right in!"
Lakshmi blushed. "Tarun!"
"Acha teek hai," he said, turning to get a look at Bani. "Not bad… but I thought tumhara favourite colour white tha!"
"I was going to get white," she answered. "But Bani wouldn't listen… she kept saying she wanted pink and she didn't even tell me why!"
Tarun shook his head. "Zaroor Jai ka favourite hoga… waise how did he react? Im sure he must have flipped seeing the back!"
Lakshmi grinned. "Issi liye toh, woh teen gaante se usse chod nahi raha hai!"
Tarun shook his head. "Jai bhi na… bilkul ek bewakoof hai!"
"Because its so obvious that Bani is trying to make him jealous and he fell right for it!"
Lakshmi narrowed her eyes. "Really? What would you have done?"
"I would have continued flirting with that girl… kya naam hai uska? Oh, Annie!"
Tarun heard enough of the girls' conversation the night before, where a somewhat depressed Bani arrived and almost broke down crying, to catch up on the scenario. The rest of the night passed with Lakshmi abusing Jai and Rano consoling Bani. Tarun wouldn't have cared, if their voices weren't so loud, keeping him far from sleep!
Lakshmi's mouth dropped open. "I cannot believe you… you are supporting your best friend in all this!"
"Im just saying it was a smarter thing to do," he answered. "Now, all you three girls will bug him about this for the rest of his life!"
"Spoken like a true lawyer!"
Tarun laughed. "Can't help it… waise bhi, Jai hai toh tumhara hi bhai na. Why do you want trouble him?"
"Because he is just being stupid this time," she explained. "Waise bhi, Im glad. I was honestly starting to forget how good they look together!"
"So are they back together?"
Lakshmi didn't have an answer to that. "Pata nahi… But I hope so. I don't even know what went wrong in the first place. "
"Hmm… must be something really big, because Jai would never have let her go for that one month."
Lakshmi sighed. "Whatever it was, I hope its gone. There is no denying  how much they love each other!"
"You weren't this confident last night, when you were telling Bani to fight for her husband, etcetera etcetera!"
Lakshmi grinned sheepishly. "You know I just said that to make her do something! If not, she would just sit there and cry… pata nahi, woh Jai ke samna kyun blank ho jati hai! Pehle toh aise nahi thi…"
That seemed to put Tarun in deep thought. Being a lawyer by profession, it was his second nature to dig into the facts and right now, listening to his wife, he was beginning to suspect something big in his best friend's life, that he was hiding from everyone. If not, why else would Jai, who loved Bani more than possible, let her leave for a month? And moreover, the same Jai who would never take a second glance at another woman, except his wife, start flirting with his P.A.?
But the most intriguing was Bani, who T never had shared a close bond with, but still admired for her daring attitude. He still remembered her a year ago, when she first walked into the Walia Mansion, taking what was her sister's place. He never, in his wildest dreams, expected her to make a place in Jai's heart, who was very difficult at times, but she did. So, how did the girl who threatened the mighty Jai Walia once and barged into his ordered life without permission, succumb to tears upon being ignored by the man she loves?
This was very worrisome for Tarun. It wasn't normal to see one of this favourite couples to be fighting like two kids.  
"Helllooo?" Lakshmi said, waving a hand. "Where are you lost?"
Tarun jerked out of his thoughts, making a note to figure out this puzzle, which everyone was conveniently ignoring.
"Kuch nahi," he replied. Telling his wife would mean a public announcement of his intentions. "Chalo, lets dance!"

Phew! That was ten pages on word!

I know, I know, there wasn't a lot of Jai and Bani, but the story has to move on and I enjoy writing about things that happen outside the JB bubble:

- I included Ranveer's part, because he was my favourite character in the actual show (before Ekta butchered him anyway) and I think his care for both Jai and Rano is soo cute. 
- Tarun, because he had to have a say in this whole drama. And I felt he should be known more than Lakshmi's husband and Jai's close friend. 

And finally Bani... well, I hope i cleared the air about why Bani acts the way she does. Its just that no matter what Jai does, he will always remind her that he somehow was responsible for the death of her only sister, whom she idolized and loved a lot. Even in the prequel, which some of you may not have read or don't remember, Bani was always conscious of the fact that she took her sister's place in Jai's life. And the fact that Pia did end up loving Jai, doesn't help ease away guilt. 

The point of this story was always how two people, deeply in love, deal with the things that forces them apart. 

So, with that I will stop ranting. Leave your thoughts, feelings, anger, frustration (hopefully on the characters and not me! WinkLOL) or suggestions. I, like always, want to know what you think. 

Love you loads! Hug


The following 16 member(s) liked the above post:


orchidpurple Goldie

Joined: 26 April 2010
Posts: 1007

Posted: 20 April 2012 at 8:16pm | IP Logged
Loved it all...
RR interaction and Tarun-Lakshmi interaction was nicely penned...
and what do I say about the cutest couple...the entry...the close dance...
finally...Neil knows the least one less misunderstanding...

Thanks for the PM and the update..


The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:


sowmya18 Goldie

Joined: 04 June 2010
Posts: 1919

Posted: 20 April 2012 at 10:03pm | IP Logged
yup..i was waiting for u to update...
lovely update...u just made my day...
thanks for the pm...

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:


-Archi- Goldie

Joined: 07 June 2006
Posts: 1181

Posted: 20 April 2012 at 10:19pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by sowmya18

yup..i was waiting for u to update...
lovely update...u just made my day...
thanks for the pm...

i was gonna update last night, but i ended up sleeping! LOL
And i saw your post in the morning and felt bad for keeping you waiting! 
alicia212 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 01 May 2006
Posts: 7731

Posted: 20 April 2012 at 11:22pm | IP Logged
wow great story plz update soon
thanks for the pm

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:


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