Gunahon Ka Devta

FF:Mehrbaan saayein(chapter6,page7)

rainurubal thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago

Hey guys ,oops!!!! sorry ,actually all my diis

hi ,me the singing monster,well actually in ccc not here

Maybe i 'm sounding stupid to some of my friends,because i going to write a FF on Avita

I don't know ,if it's good or bad

So that's why all chappals ,jhadoo,tamatar are aloowed to be thrown at me,excluding non-veg like eggs(I can't even tolerate smell of non-veg)

All types of comments are welcomed and i also need advices from my beautifull diis

Background

Udaypur

Arpita lives in Raj Mahal with her Family.She is second daughter of Rani maa and Raja sahib.

Badi rani maa: Arpita's grandmother and a widow

Raja sahib:Father of three childrens,loves equally his chidrens and a humble person

Rani maa: an intelligent women ,loves her childrens but she pays more attention to her son and sonali.She hardly have talks with Arpita

Mohhit:18,he is the,, maa da ladla" .

Sonali:she is quite fun loving person ,enjoys her life fully and is careless.she left Udaypur at the gae of 19 ,much against to rani maa's wish,buut later she convinced everyone in raj mahal by her lovely talks

There are many more memebers in raj mahal,like chacha ,chachi and their childrens but they aren't important(also servants )

Rajgarh

Avdesh singh thakur:A 26 years old young Business tycoon ,lives with his best friend Parvesh in Raj garh ,he is raja os rajgarh bujt he doesn't rule like Arpita's family .he lives alone here in india and his father is in england.he is much more richer than Arpita's family .he uses daily helicopter beceuase his office is in mumbai.

there are more members in Avdesh's big house bunow.t i can't reveal them

chapter1=page 1
chapter2=page2
chapter3=page 4
chapter4=page 5
chapter5 =page 6
chapter6=page 7Edited by rubal223 - 12 years ago

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jasveensokhi thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Hey Rubal dear meh first 2 comment yayyy

n Cngratzzz dear for ur first FF ur concept is

realy vry nic amazing dear👏

luved ur FF n luv u also😳😳
Edited by jasveensokhi - 12 years ago
PrashT thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Rubal😳😳😳

Love ur hidden talent😉

Interesting Story line..

Keep them coming...


Edited by prash_t - 12 years ago
rainurubal thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago

chapter1

Mumbai in a club

Avdesh:ok,Mr patson ,the deal is final

Mr patson:Yes,Mr Singh,we are really happy that my company got an opportunity to work with you ,And more than that ,you are son of Mr Amar Singh.

Avdesh:a little bit uncomfortable:yes,so can i have the files for a little bit informatiion?

Mr patson:yes ,sure

Mumbai in the same club

Sonali is dancing with his boyfriend Ranvijay(In Rajmahal ,no one is aware of sonali being in relationship)

Ranvijay:Hey,you are beautifull,dont worry,i will convince my parents

Sona:I trust you and yoour abilities,but you know Rani maa.She is very strict. she has decided to get me married in next 2,3 months.This is so ridiculous ! I will be not asked if I wanna get married or not

Ranvijay:hey sona ,you should be happy that she allowed you to study in mumbai,she doesn't kepp spying on you like she does on yoour lovely Arpita.

sona:what ? Lovely?Are you kidding?ok i will tell you.She is younger than me but no-one loves her except my dad,oops, sorry ,except my pita ji.she is ...a little bit confused...I mean...she just doesn't fits in our family.I love when she got punished from Rani maa

Ranvijay:oh!so you don't like her.

Sona:Well,I don't know .I somtimes get jealous ,she doesn't react when i get pampered.Its like it doesn't matter to her what others are doing and what not.How can be she so satisfied with everything she get.Whenever I went to Udaypur ,she hardly talks with me .She is always busy ,doing pooja ,cooking ,studying or playing with childrens .Her friends are also like her .strange!

Ranvijay:When are you going back to your village?

Sona:Next monday

Ranvijay:And when you will be back?

Sona:I don't know ,if i 'll be back or not

Ranvijay:What do you mean by this?

Sona :Marriage

Ranvijay:I know you love me and now tell me What's in your mind?I'm very sure you will not marry any stranger

Sona:(thinks in her mind ,well i also love your money).Darling.aS of now ,Rani maa will never accept our relationship and if she came to about your dad drug's business ,then it will create problems.Don't youo worry! I have plan

Ranvijay:And what's the plan?

Sona:Jab sahi waqt aayee ga ,i will tell you.

Raj Mahal

Pandit: Rani maa ,aapki badi beti ke liye bohut acche rishte aaye hain ,par sabse yogya yeh hai (pandit showing photo of Avdesh to ranni maa and and others).Inka apna karobaar hai,ladka aachha hai,yehi rajgarh mein rehta hai,apne dost aur daayi maa ke saath.

Raja sahib:Aur iska parivaar

Pandit: Ji Akela rehta hai apni daayi maa ke saath,suna hai,apne pita se kuch zyaada jamti nahi hai ,isliye woh pardes mein rehte hai

chachi: wah kya baat hai ,akela rehta hai.main toh kehti hoon ,inki daayi maa se baat kar ke rishta jaldi pakka kar dijiye ,apni sonali raaj karegi

Raja sahib:nahi ,itni jaldi nahi pehle main khud is ladke ke baare mein pooch taash karoon ga

Pandit:jaise aapki marzi

After two weeks in Raj mahal

Avdesh aur sonali ka rishta pakka ho gaya aur ab unki sagai ho rahi hai

Mohit : Avdesh ,tu to aaj bada dashing lag raha hai

Avdesh : tu apni bakwaas apne paas rakh ,kaha fasa diya daayi maa ne mujhe

Mohit:kya bhau aise kyun bol raha hai ,bhabhi aaccchi aur khubsoorat to hai

Avdesh : tujhe nahi lagta yahan par teri vahini se zyaada aur bhi khubsoorat hai jaise(pointing to Arpita),wahan dekh ,simple sa lehnga pehna hai phir bhi gazab dhah rahi hai,achha yeh sab chod tune Mr patson ki files check ki,I don't want any mistakes.

Mohit:mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ke bhai aap is shaadi se khush nahi ho

Avdesh : tu janta hai ,main yeh shaadi kyun kara raha hoon,sirf daayi maa ke liye ,main chahta hoon ke meri hone waali biwi meri daayi maa ka khyaal rakhe

Mohit: to rakhe gi na ,sanskaari lag rahi hai

Avdesh : well , tu kya jaane sonali kitni sanskaari hai

jasveensokhi thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Yayyy meh again first 2 comment dekha i m 2 fast😆

now coming 2 ur update  Amazing Rubal WOWWW

I must say u have an amazing talent wow

dear luved d way Avi praised Arpi for her

looks😳 kya baat hai yaar chak ditta tu😆

well egarly w8ing for another part😳
Edited by jasveensokhi - 12 years ago
PrashT thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Rubal🤗🤗

Nice title...of FF😳😳

Ab Avi ki sagai bhi sonali ho rahi hai

Sonali dsnt like Arpita at all😡😡😡 Now what plans she has made😡😡

Awww😳 Avi is really cute😳😳😳

Even he doesnt like Sonali  Wish..Avita get married😳😉




Loved the part Ubal dear...

Waiting for next one😳😳

Love ya..

Hugs to you for ur new FF🤗

Edited by prash_t - 12 years ago
yoga23priya thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
Hey Sweets 🤗

Congratulation on your FF  🤗

Since your story is Rajasthani BG title suits perfectly 😳

RV is finally here 🥳  🤪

Avi praised Arpi ☺️ ☺️

Sonali is something hiding something and i don't understand why rani ma doesn't show affection towards Arpi 😕 😕



love you 🤗

PS please make a Index page 😳
Edited by yoga23priya - 12 years ago
rainurubal thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
sab reserved kyun hai
i m saying this because i m going to post one chapter each day
aise hi res karte raho ge kya?
and tell me about FF name ,
should i change it?
Edited by rubal223 - 12 years ago
jasveensokhi thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Rubal no d title is vry nic n suits ur FF

well i unresed mah posts on page 1😉
PrashT thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Unresd my both posts on page 1 😊