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Sup ??
Long Time eh ? Well Not So :P
But Da Wait For An ff is Long ;]
Enewaii Seedhi baat no Bakwaas.
Here's Da update.
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Here u Go :)
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I awoke with a start and looked around my room. It was the same, but somehow different. Like something had changed. And it scared me. I looked at the clock. Oh my gosh! It's 10:30! I never sleep in that late! I stepped out of bed and looked at myself in the mirror. My curls were tangled, I was still wearing my wet white dress with the tear on the bottom, and had tear streaks on my face from all the crying last night. To sum it up, I looked like crap.
It was Saturday. The first official day of summer had begun and I just wanted it to end as quickly as it had started. Well, got to start my usual morning routine. I washed my face and I stripped my white dress off and threw it in my wastebasket. I do not need any reminders of what happened last night.
Oh God. Last night. Memories replayed through my head. I remembered the pain on my mother's face when I had yelled at her. I have never yelled at my mom like that before. Ever. Oh crap. Now I'm starting to feel bad. But everything I said last night was true. She knew it. I knew it. We both knew it. And there was no way I was going to apologize for being right.
Maybe I should do some of my favorite things instead of moping around and replaying all the horrible events that happened last night. Hopefully I'll forget. Okay favorite things, favorite things.
I snatched a paper from my desk drawer and grabbed a pen and wrote neatly:
Arohi Sharma's Favorite things:
1.) Singing
2.) Dancing
3.)
I kept question three blank. Wow... Pathetic. I only have two favorite things to do. I know it may seem silly that I'm writing these things down but I never realized until now, that I had forgotten my favorite things. My mind drew up a blank for a few seconds because honestly, these things were pieces of the old Arohi. Singing and dancing. Two things that I had long since forgotten to do after my dad died. I forgot how to do a lot of things after his death. Like, being happy. Or being normal. I had simply just given up.
A rush of emotions over whelmed me. I missed me. The old me. Not this pathetic pile of whale blubber. I used to be happy. I had friends. I had a life. Everything was perfect. And than, that fateful day came when my dad got sick, and everything changed. I felt like crying again. Wow. I really have been crying a lot this lately. Get it together Aru! I took a deep breath and headed downstairs. Empty. No shocker there. Somehow I knew that things were going to get worse with my mother first than better. I think that's why I woke up this morning that change was in the air. And I had a feeling that my mother was going to be gone a whole lot more than before. And I knew why. She was going to pull the same crap she has been but for a different reason. I had now made it known that I knew what she had been doing for the past eight years and that I was tired of it. And all of this was truly scaring me. I didn't want to lose my mother. But I also didn't want to be left alone continually like I had been for eight years.
I headed to the only thing that could offer me comfort. The fridge. Food. I opened the door and looked at it's contents: cheese, tortillas, mayo, mustard, juice, coldcuts, and some fruit. Basically nothing that I was interested in. We need to go grocery shopping! Do we have any comfort food at all? I whipped open the freezer and spotted "Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Ice cream." Now that's what I'm talking about!
I threw off the lid and dug a spoon. Mmm... Suddenly, a voice in the back of my head told me that I shouldn't be doing this. If I so desperately wanted my life to change, then I needed to change it. No one else. With a sigh, I tossed the tub aside and put my head on my hand.
I needed to start with my biggest problem: my weight. I needed it to change significantly. And it needed to start before I moved and went back to another school. Because if I didn't start now, I knew I would never start. It's now or never.
This is going to take a whole lot of perseverance. But I was determined to do it. I was going to change for one person. My dad.
The sound of the doorbell ringing interrupted my quiet thoughts. Who would be coming to visit here at (I glanced at the clock on the stove) 11:00 in the morning?
I walked over to the front door and threw open the door. Oh my God. That can't be. Am I dreaming? Because there is no way in hell that this person would be standing at my front step. I shook my head, trying to wrap my head around this. Desperately trying to think of this situation where this event taking place even made sense. Because, people, standing on my door step was none other than ARJUN PUNJ.
Arjun Punj. Arjun Punj is on my front step. Arjun freaking Punj. I cannot believe this. This cannot be real. I think I'm dreaming. No, actually it might be a nightmare.
As much as I told myself that this wasn't real, it was. It really was. He stood there nervously for a few more minutes while I stared like an idiot and shuffled from foot to foot. This is a first. I've never seen Punj look nervous. But the worse part was that he was staring at me. Me.
I shook my head and re entered reality. And with that, I suddenly remembered all that he and his basketball cronies did and a rush of anger replaced my amazement.
"What do you want?" I asked. Yes. I realize that my question was rude. But hello? This guy threw food at me and almost made me drown!
"I uh, uh I just wanted to say that-th uh..." he stumbled across the words. Wow. This is new.
I continued staring at him. Well, more like glaring at him. I was not in the mood to see or even speak to this jerk.
"The party, I-I had no idea that all that was going to happen and I feel bad. And that-" he stopped mid-sentence and looked at me helplessly.
"That?" I urged.
" I'msorry!Ididn'tmeanforthattohappen!" his words all came out in a rush that I had to have a few minutes to digest it all.
"Sorry? That's all you have to say?" Wow. I'm getting good at this bravery thing. And I even added the harsh tone!
"Uh, yeah I guess." he looked down at his shoes.
"You guess? You guys almost drowned me at your party and all you can say is sorry?"
He didn't answer. He just continued to look down. He remained that way for a few more minutes until he spoke up.
" It got out of hand. I guess I wasn't thinking."
"No, you weren't thinking. What makes you think that you have the right to pick on someone at a party? I don't get it!" By now, I had tears in my eyes. I was still very emotional about this ordeal.
"Did you even stop to think that maybe, just maybe that I might have feelings? And that those feelings might have been hurt?" The tears were already falling and I made no move to wipe them away.
" You show up at my doorstep and apologize for almost killing me and then expect me to accept it? After all that you jerks have put me through? I don't get it, Arjun!" I was yelling by now. Oh God. This is getting out of hand. I don't know if I can take this anymore.
"I'm-I'm sorry." he finally looked up. And I saw guilt and remorse in his face. But I didn't care.
" No you're not. So don't say that. Don't you dare say that."
I made a move to close the door in his face, but before I could, he shoved something in my hand. I didn't register what it was. I just threw it on the ground and slid down the door and cried in my hands. Why now? Why of all days? This was supposed to be a happy day. A joyous day. After I had calmed down, I looked at what Arjun had given me. I reached across the room and picked it up. My father's songbook. How could he have- Oh yeah. Last night.
I groaned and put my head in my hands. I wanted this day to end so badly.
Okay, so I haven't exactly kept my word. But I can't help it! I'm too depressed to exercise right now! I mostly spent the day watching t.v.
I must have fallen asleep, because next thing I know, I heard the lock turn in our front door and in entered my mother. Gulp. What's going to happen?
I heard her footsteps walk towards the kitchen and look towards the living room, where I was asleep on. She gave me a blank stare and walked upstairs. And that right there made me feel worse. She barely acknowledged me. Like if I was just some stranger. Maybe I am in a way. I know it's crazy but I think I changed in the past 24 hours. I'm braver. That's one. I was able to tell off Arjun and my mom. And I'm more determined. Determined to change this year.
5:00 in the freaking morning! Oh my gosh. I'm dying here. I set my alarm clock to that time to exercise. Bleh. Kill me now. Wait! First, I got to weigh myself. Good thinking, Aru! Okay all I need is a scale. Scale, scale, scale. Bathroom. It should be in the bathroom. Ahh! I found it!
... I weigh pounds 160 pounds. 160 Freaking pounds. I haven't gotten on a scale for about eight years. And that was just when I was playing around. I have realllyyy let myself go. But... that doesn't matter now because I am going to change. Watch out, world! Here comes Aru Sharma!
Five minutes into jogging and I'm already huffing and puffing. Wow. Just wow. I really am pathetic. I focused my eyes on the rising sun and quickened my pace. The only thing that was keeping my mind off the pain was my dad. I had to do this for him. The cool morning air hit me and I looked around at my surroundings. Old lady walking her dog, cars passing by, guy riding on his bicycle, Arjun Punj jogging towards me...
WAIT! WHAT? Back up. Someone save me. He's running this way! Oh God! What am I going to do! Here I am, sweating like a disgusting pig while he runs towards me in all his muscular glory! He's coming closer! Please, please, please ignore me. I-
" Arohi?" he cocked his head in surprise.
"H-hi Arjun." I said shyly. Ok, even though he was responsible for nearly drowning me, I still felt embarrassed and not to mention a slight bit of fear being around him. I mean, last time I spoke to this guy, I was screaming my head off!
"So um, what are you doing here this early in the morning?" Hmmm... making small talk. Interesting.
" Jogging." I added in a quiet voice.
"Oh, uh that's cool. Well I'll see you- around." he continued running. Well that wasn't awkward at all. Note the sarcastic tone.
I tried to push aside the peculiar event that had just occurred and concentrated on my jogging. Right, left, right, left. And even though I was sweating like a pig, my feet felt like dying, and I was getting a cramp, I felt something that I hadn't felt in a long time. I felt good. It was like I was getting back into the routine of my old self. I remembered taking morning walks and jogs with my father. We would talk about anything. Just me and my dad. With every step, I felt like my fat was melting off my body.
I did it! I went jogging for 30 minutes and I survived! I collapsed on my front lawn and looked up at the morning sun. I've never felt more happy in my entire life! Woo hoo! I feel rejuvenated! Reborn! I ran up my lawn and collapsed on the soft grass. I smiled up at the sky. I, Arohi Sharma had just started to overcome my first enemy: my weight. I don't know how long I laid there. I think I was just drinking in my success. I was too busy staring up at the blue sky and listening to the sound of birds twittering and dogs barking when a voice broke through my peace.
" Nice day, huh?"
I whipped my head up so fast that I felt dizzy when I looked up at the speaker. Arjun Punj? Why does he keep talking to me? I stood up and looked up at him. He was staring up at me on the sidewalk.
"Uh, yeah." I answered meekly.
"Sooo..."
I just didn't get it. Why, all of a sudden was he speaking to me? Just because he almost killed me? I thought that he would try to distance himself between me as much as possible. Or at least go back to bullying to me.
An awkward silence followed. I stared down at my feet when I suddenly found my voice and didn't bother to keep the harshness out of the sentence.
"Why are you suddenly talking to me?"
At this question, he shifted awkwardly and finally looked up at me.
"I don't know. I guess because-" He left the sentence unfinished.
"Because you feel sorry for me?" I said it a little louder than I intended.
He swallowed loudly.
"No...I- yes-No. I just- I'm sorry." He bowed his head.
I can't believe it. He's actually making me feel sorry for him. And despite whatever had happened, I was going to forgive him. Forgive him for hurting me, forgive him for making this past year a miserable experience for me. And I had no idea why.
"Ok." I said quietly while staring at him.
At that sentence, I turned around and headed back up my walk and into the house. And I didn't look back once.
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*Phew
Pretty tiring Job ;]
Wid Regards
Awii/Sumii
And Yeah - Likes/Criticism Appreciated :]
Take Care.
Edited by Deviil.Scorpion - 12 years ago
