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AR: Midnight Musings...[Blog Link : Page 140] (Page 43)

belle_moi Senior Member
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Posted: 29 June 2011 at 5:50am | IP Logged
U.P.D.A.T.E LOL

x

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Aanya.

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Posted: 29 June 2011 at 9:42am | IP Logged
Originally posted by belle_moi

U.P.D.A.T.E LOL

x

Next week :|

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sweetdesire

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Posted: 30 June 2011 at 11:48am | IP Logged
hey hi Aanya
i read ur mini ff Isa and the first thing that came to my mind is that,the word Isa is it an abbreviation for some word or it a russian word then i guess i know the meaningEmbarrassed,but if it is not Crythen atleast tell me that it is some different word.
uff...yaar too much suspense but frankly speaking i am likng the suspense,and i wish u could make it a full fledged ff,there are very few ff with such suspense story.
and coming to Isa,u writing it from armaans pov is good,its a nice change from the usual ridzi pov ff,hehhee even my ff is included in that list,but i love armaan so much yaar,so its fun to read from his pov.And Dmitri i am so hating himAngry,i think he has made armaan a gangster and armaan just blindly follows him thinking he is a good man,poor armaanUnhappy
now after such long comment u have to update super soon,will be waiting
love
nikki


Edited by niknavyu - 30 June 2011 at 12:20pm

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Aanya.

anumeha_rajat IF-Sizzlerz
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Posted: 30 June 2011 at 1:53pm | IP Logged

hey aanya...

sorry for the late comment...

was buzy wid exams...

i really liked the concept of this SS of urs...

n sounds really interesting...

specially the name u gave..ISA...

its really beautiful...

n hope armi make her smile...n waiitng for all the past things open up..

thnx for the pm...

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Aanya.

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Aanya.
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Posts: 9873

Posted: 02 July 2011 at 12:26am | IP Logged
To everyone-

I will update sometime in the next week! Honestly, I'm not sure! 

I've got a lot of academic stuff to do and as dramatic as it sounds, 24 hours a day JUST DOESN'T SUFFICE :P I've been commenting on FFs because it's my "free time"! I've written a few pages ahead and maybe I'll update a few days later! <3

Continue pestering me, I LOVE it LOL

Y'all are amazing to keep reading my amateur work! Muaahh :*


*EDITED*

Please check this out! Fan Fiction Awards
Vote for me if you think I deserve it  <3

xoxo
Aanya


Edited by Aanya_taanu4evr - 02 July 2011 at 2:00am

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belle_moi Senior Member
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Posts: 422

Posted: 02 July 2011 at 12:38am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Aanya_taanu4evr

To everyone-

I will update sometime in the next week! Honestly, I'm not sure! 

I've got a lot of academic stuff to do and as dramatic as it sounds, 24 hours a day JUST DOESN'T SUFFICE :P I've been commenting on FFs because it's my "free time"! I've written a few pages ahead and maybe I'll update a few days later! <3

Continue pestering me, I LOVE it LOL

Y'all are amazing to keep reading my amateur work! Muaahh :*

xoxo
Aanya


Hahaha! "continue pesterin me. I love it", man, I love U! And u'd BETTER update someotime in this week, cuz u do know that i will  feed u, piece by piece to sharks if u dont! Your work's amazing too :)
Lots of love,
Antara:)

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Aanya.

Aanya. IF-Rockerz
Aanya.
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Posts: 9873

Posted: 02 July 2011 at 10:09am | IP Logged
Hello!
Yeah I know I said I'd update next week, but I'm in good spirits today and I was able to wrap this part up :D I'm not quite sure how this turned out, please do leave your opinions! :)
Read on:


PART 3

 

 

The pitter patter of the rain drops kept me awake at night, while she slept peacefully. My mind wandered around of its own accord, while I tried to keep it in check. I couldn't afford to think about the past. It would do no good.

 

I checked my watch for the millionth time. 5 am. I wondered if she would get up and go for a jog. I wondered if I'd let her go. I opened my rucksack, and took out the tiny chip from my box of gadgets. I got up and slipped out of her room to do what I had to do. It was the only way I'd let her go jogging. I tried to imagine how she would react if she came to know what I'd done in order to let her jog. I remembered how she used to get angry. I loved it. A smile tugged at my lips as I reminisced.

 

*flashback*

 

She advanced towards me, her eyes narrowed and her nostrils flaring. "Armaan?" she said, in the sweetest tone I'd ever heard. But I knew better. Boy, she was angry.

 

"Uh...kya hua?" I asked, my voice halting.

 

"Tum Aliya ke saath flirt kar rahe the?"

 

I knew I was treading on thin ice. "Flirt? Main? Pssht. Of course not!" I said, as nonchalantly as I could manage. It was the truth. I hadn't been flirting with anyone. How could I when everyone else just ceased to exist when she came?

 

"Acha? Toh tum usse itna chipak ke kyun khade the?" she questioned me, her hands on her hips.

 

"Riddhima...main chipak kar nahiin khada tha! Woh mujhse chipak rahi thi!!! I swear, baby, I wasn't flirting!"

 

"Really? How come I don't believe you? If she was sticking to you, you could've moved away but no. Tumhe toh bada mazaa aat hai na uske saath flirt karne mein?"

 

I smiled. She looked so adorable when she was jealous! I walked up to her, while she was still glaring at me. I came to a standstill when we were almost touching. Wrapping my arms around her waist, I said, "I love you and no one else, Isa. You mean everything to me, baby."

 

The fury disappeared from her eyes and her face broke into a smile while a blush threatened to adorn her cheeks. "I love you too, Armaan."

And we kissed.

 

*Present*

 

The noise woke me up. A swift gush of wind blew across the room and I scrunched my eyes to find where it came from. I saw the window banging against the grill, opening and closing due to the wind. I got up, shut the window and walked towards her. She was still sleeping, oblivious to the howling wind. I covered her up some more. She snuggled deep into the blanket. I looked fondly at her, wanting to run my fingers through her hair again. Wanting to hug her. Wanting to bury my face in the crook of her neck, and feel my heart pumping again.

 

I stopped mid air realizing what I was about to do. My hand hovered over her head before I took it back, the guilt of what I'd caused her, consuming me like a burning hot flame. I didn't deserve her. I didn't deserve any of it. She was right. I had no right on her. I'd hurt her immeasurably. Moving around, roughing it since the past three years, I thought I'd moved on. But who the hell was I kidding? She was still there with me. She was the silent whisper at the end of each word I spoke, she was in my every breath, every morning, every night, and I thought I'd moved on. Clearly, I couldn't be more wrong.

 

I made my way back to the bean bag, as I heard her stir. I sat, threw my head back and closed my eyes, as if asleep. A few minutes later, I heard the rustle of the blanket. I heard her getting up and moving towards her desk. I fought a smile when I heard her mouth a sharp expletive when she stubbed her toe. Resisting the urge to get up, I remained in my position. I felt her moving towards me, probably checking if I was asleep. I stayed put.

 

I could sense her proximity. She was almost touching me. I wondered what she was looking for. She bent closer to me, a few strands of her hair brushing my face. I felt a teardrop splash on my forehead as she ran her fingers through my hair, gently. On an impulse, my eyes flew open. Startled, she stumbled and fell on me. I wrapped my arms around her, cushioning her fall. I lost myself into her emerald eyes. They widened with each passing second, the questions in them multiplying. It irked me to see that shadow of pain in her eyes. It hadn't gone since I came. I mentally slapped my forehead as I remembered what I was supposed to do. Watch over her. Hold her hostage. More importantly, make her smile.

 

I pushed back her hair behind her ear. I knew what I was about to do wouldn't bring her smile back, but if it brought back even a glimpse of the fiery Riddhima I knew, it'd be worth it. I went closer to her until our noses were almost touching, not breaking the eye contact. She closed her eyes, her breath kissing my face. Purposely rubbing the tip of my nose along her cheek, I whispered in her ear. "I know I'm hot. Par aise stare mat karo! You're making it a little too obvious."

 

The spell broke. She jerked upwards, removing herself from my embrace. "You wish! You are not hot. You're the most...the most un-hot person I know! In fact, you're SO ugly that I'd never go out with you even if you paid me to do it! And has anyone told you? Your dimples are horrible. HO-RRI-BLE! And those six pack abs. You think they're hot? They're NOT. Arghh...why am I even talking to you???!!" sticking her tongue out at me, she stomped off. For a long time, the smile never left my face. She may be angry and pissed off but at least she wasn't lifeless anymore. It reminded me a lot of our first meeting. It'd started off with me saying the same thing I'd told her moments ago. Maybe the words brought everything back for her. Right up to the end of it all.

 

I shook my head to clear the muddled thoughts. Grinning, I made my way to the kitchen. I plopped myself on the platform and watched her work, the stony silence prevailing. She passed by me wordlessly and went into the room. She walked right up to the door and then turned back and walked towards me.

 

"Am I ALLOWED to go for a jog?"

 

I grinned. I'd known this was coming. "Of course! Go ahead, jog, it's good for health!"

 

"Really?" The shocked expression on her face was priceless. I almost laughed.

 

"Yep! But-"

 

"Ha! I KNEW it! There had to be a catch! What's the deal? I have to jog with handcuffs?" she quipped sardonically.

 

"No, no. Nothing that extreme. I was about to say, "But don't try and be smart." However handcuffs are an intriguing idea..." I trailed off laughing, as I saw her nostrils flare. I really was managing to send her over the edge!

 

"Shut up. And don't you DARE follow me!"

 

I chose not to comment on that.

 

She went in the room to get changed, while I made coffee for myself. I turned around when I felt her tapping impatiently on my shoulder.

 

"What?!" I asked.

 

"Why are you using my kitchen like it's yours? I don't like it!"

 

I grinned cheekily at her. In the sweetest voice I could manage, I asked her, "Would YOU rather make coffee for me Riddhima? I wouldn't mind that at all!"

 

"I...you...you...just...arghh!" She sputtered in anger while I made my way to the television, my coffee in my hand. A few minutes later, I heard the door slam shut.

 

I plugged in the chip in the small palmtop I'd got. A few seconds later, the map appeared. The path on which she was jogging showed in yellow. The moment she deviated from the path, an alarm would ring, alerting me. I smiled. The wonders of technology.

 

It was almost two hours since I'd been watching the yellow line. It never deviated from it's path. I was beginning to wonder now. Would she really return? Most victims try and escape at least once! I watched the yellow line, slowly advancing towards the house. My eyes drooped. I'd barely slept last night. The fatigue took over me, making me feel drowsy. The house was quiet. My head fell on the cushion beside me. It felt good to rest properly.

 

I tried her cell phone but she wasn't picking up. What if she'd already left for my house? I cringed as I heard another shot. The rising tide of panic in my heart threatened to overwhelm me. What if she came to know? How would I ever explain it to her?! The enormity of what I'd done washed over me along with the guilt. I crouched behind the sofa. Dmitri had told me not to come unless he called for me. A few more shots were heard and then a scream. I wondered who had died.

 

I hoped and prayed with all my heart that she wouldn't come today. That something, anything, would stop her. Just then Mikhail came. He told me that Dmitri had asked for me. I picked up my gun and headed out, being as silent as possible. "The opponent must never be underestimated, even if they're weaponless." That's what he'd taught me. I walked silently, following Mikhail into the cabin. I entered into the cabin and saw Dmitri. His back faced me. Even from the back you could tell he was proud. Powerful. He turned around and faced me. The ruthlessness in his eyes chilled me. I'd never seen him like this.

 

"This is your chance. The culmination of your training. Behind the cabin, there's a man, tied up. Go to him. And shoot him dead. I want you to kill him in one shot itself. I hate it when there's a mess.

 

I gulped back the lump of fear in my throat. My hands shook violently, as I followed him to the back. I was supposed to kill that man. Take his life away. Images of how he might have a family, burned my mind. My steps slowed with every passing second. My reluctance increased every moment. And then there was still her. She always came through the back. She was supposed to come over today. I hope she doesn't.

 

"Wait here." Said Mikhail.

 

I sat on the ground, my head in my hands. I loved her, so much! So much, that I'd told Dmitri that I wanted out. That I wanted a normal job, a normal life with her. And he'd told me this would be my last task. My last task...my first kill.

 

Mikhail told me to follow him. Once again, I hoped she would come once this was all over.

 

I followed him, making my way over the brambles. I saw a man, gagged and tied to the tree. The disgust welled up inside me. He was tied against "our" tree. The tree on which we'd inscribed "Armaan loves Isa". I grimaced and took a deep breath, reassuring myself that it'd be fine. That I would do this one thing and then I was out. I could live with her, for the rest of my life.

 

I saw the man's face, twisted with pain and fear. His eyes were large and bloodshot, pleading me to let him go. The gun shook violently in my hands and my resolve wavered. I couldn't kill him...it wasn't my place to do it! I gave Dmitri a helpless glance, hoping he'd understand. He only said two words. "Do it."

 

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Her face flashed before me. The lure of living a normal life with her strengthened my resolve a little. Breathing shakily with beads of sweat on my forehead, I raised the gun and pointed it to his heart. I'd been trained. One shot. One life.

 

My hands pressed the trigger hesitantly. I didn't want to do this. That darkness inside me, the urge to kill, was gone. She'd removed it. Unknowingly, she had made me a better person. Or at any rate, someone who doesn't kill.

 

I heard Mikhail telling me to get it over with. I closed my eyes briefly and then opened them, my fingers pressing the trigger.

The sound of the bullet echoed in the deathly silence along with a piercing scream. My hands dropped the gun and looked around. Dmitri passed a smile to me. My hands shook and I sweated, looking at the dead body. He was dead. I turned around, going back to the cabin when I heard a whimper. I looked in front of me. She was here. She'd seen it all.

 

I saw her standing there, her face ashen. Big fat tears rolled down her cheeks but neither of us said anything. What could I possibly say to her? "Hey Riddhima! I know you're surprised, but this is the truth. I'm a killer." My heart raced in fear. She was still standing there, unmoving. I walked towards her.

 

"Riddhima. I-" I held her by her shoulders.

 

She jerked my hand off. "Don't touch me! Go away Armaan...go! You...you shot...you killed that man! You MURDERED him?"

 

"Riddhima listen, I can-"

 

"DON'T! I hate you Armaan! I can't believe I was stupid enough to fall in love with you! You're a killer, a murderer. You disgust me."

 

Her words reverberated in my mind. A killer. A murderer. That's what I was. I didn't go after her. What would I say to her? My heart twisted. Her words cut through me like shards of broken glass as I made my way back.

 

I woke up, gasping. The day never failed to haunt me. It was embedded in my memory. Ready to mock me, taunt me and make the guilt resurface everyday. And today, after being with her, it all came back. After she'd left, I'd gone to Dmitri, told him I didn't want to leave. That day, I'd made two kills. One, the man tied to the tree and the other, myself.

 

I rubbed my eyes and drank a little of the black coffee, now cold, that lay on the table beside me. Forcing myself not to think about anything but the present, I fixed my stare on the T.V, carefully watching the yellow line. Judging from the device she had about ten minutes before she got home. I debated for a moment whether or not to make a call to Dmitri before taking out my cell phone and calling him.

 

"Hello?"

"Armaan. Tell me. What is it that made you call me?"

 

I felt a flicker of anger and controlled it. He knew what I wanted to ask. I took a deep breath, calming myself. It wouldn't do to get angry on him. I decided to come straight to the point.

 

"You knew it was HER."

"Yes, I confess, I did."

 

For the life of me, I couldn't understand why he'd sent me here if he knew that it was Riddhima.

 

"Then WHY?"

"It is your test."

 

I could sense the growing irritation in his voice, as his English became accented. Changing my tone to something more pleasant, I said, "I don't understand."

 

"It's quite simple, really. You are without doubt one of my best shooters. And you are young. Which makes you very valuable to me. But I cannot have one of my top men, with a glaring weakness. You are still hopelessly in love with that girl." I could almost see his face contorting in distaste, he didn't understand me.

 

"I'm not in lo-"

"Do not try and deny it. You are. Which is why I've sent you there. You shall hold her hostage for a week but this time, if ANYTHING comes your way, protect yourself and not her. If a car is coming your way, put her before you and use her as a shield instead of getting yourself killed. When you are able to do that, I shall call you back."

 

The blood rushed in my ears. I would never be able to do that. "Dmitri, I'd never-"

 

"I do not want to hear anything."

 

And I heard the click of the phone.

 

I sat on the sofa and my heart raced in panic as the words he'd used rushed back to me. What did he mean when he talked about the car? Would he actually go that far? I felt sick.

 

I heard the door open and Riddhima enter. Correcting my expression, I quickly disconnected the chip before she came to know about it. Putting on some random news channel, I sat there, staring aimlessly at the words that held no meaning for me, while she moved to the bathroom, ignoring my presence.


~~~~~~~~~~


Yep...that was it :| I'm really unsure about this part, give me your honest opinions please! <3

Check my note on this page! :) PMs shall be sent tomorrow <3

xoxo

Aanya



Edited by Aanya_taanu4evr - 25 July 2011 at 6:59am

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belle_moi Senior Member
belle_moi
belle_moi

Joined: 17 April 2011
Posts: 422

Posted: 02 July 2011 at 10:16am | IP Logged
res

*Edited*

When I was young, very young. Things were either white or black. Either good or bad. But as I grew, and my mind became corrupted, shades of grey came into existence. Because I myself was a shade of gry. Things sometimes are not good or bad, they are just there. Most of the time, love is one of those things. I find what Armaan did nothing short of monstrous, and Riddhima is absolutely right. Armaan is a murderer. But he is a lover too. He loves her, she loves him. And when you love someone you are supposed to understand them, and above all, forgive them. Either you can hold grudges, or love. its really one's choice. Coming to the part, I loved it. Though I still dont know the meaning of "Isa", something m very curious about. But I guess its Ok. I loved the part where you wrote " I saw a man, gagged and tied to the tree. The disgust welled up inside me. He was tied against "our" tree. The tree on which we'd inscribed "Armaan loves Isa"
It was beautiful, made me smile, though I was sad. All in all, I loved the part. keep it up, and update soon:)
Lots of love,
Antara:)


Edited by belle_moi - 02 July 2011 at 11:26am

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Aanya.

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