Today's Episode - Upended Lives - Page 3

Posted: 12 years ago
Zarmeen, Lams, Rachu,  thanks for your wonderful comments on this tricky issue of how the CT's have portrayed aspects of Nivi's and other's persona.

Zarmeen -- what you wrote was awesome- very sharp, very insightful. You've put your finger on the problem very well, along with Rachu -- that there is a distinction between obeying elders, stubbornness, and being samajhdar. I absolutely agree that there are ways in which the CT's have shown Nivi to be more stubborn or seeing the world in a particular way than being samjhdar.  She is very good at heart, but this her problem is that she is not able to openly talk about her feelings and thoughts to even people close to her, but believes that it is her responsibility to protect them, shield them and so she feels she must solve all the problems by herself without even the awareness of other person... But life is not like that. We have to take the help of others and sometimes realize that our own thinking may be wrong or at least incomplete or not entirely right.  All the incidents you point to are good examples of that.  She did at one point want to talk to DD about Sid, and had that dream where she tells DD and DD tries to slash her wrists, and this scares Nivi so much that she keeps quiet.   Then with Yash, she fears her dad will be so mad at Yash (and lest he runs away again) and so she thinks she'll handle it herself...
Indeed this inability to communicate directly is a problem with so many of the characters in the show. Direct communication is missing.  We had discussed this earlier around Viren's issues.  He is not open to Nivi about his issues, and she certainly is not.  It is only after he is revealed as the stalker that they confront each other fully but the CT's ruined that by giving us such lame reasons for his stalking and never clarifying whether he actually did them all or only some.  VD's passivity is another example, and Siddharth's problem we've discussed so many times.

NT dadi put it best when she told Nivi that she is not god and cannot single-handedly shape the lives of others. 
With respect to VIren things began to change after the SR, but the CT's never took their time to develop it.  They kept rushing -- rather lurching -- from one thing to the next.  Wish they had shown Nivi and Viren talking to each other more.  The love is there, but without the honest, deeply personal talks how will it mature?  Wish the CT's would not interpret mahanta with only sacrifice and pain and crying and putting up with torture, but also with giving love and understanding and being available and facing up to things openly.  They keep confusing us about Nivi's ability to understand Viren.  She understood him perfectly during his rebellion phase, so its hard to believe she don't now, no?

 I don't know whether the original theme of the show  - pyar se kyon hai inkar...has something to do with Nivi's inability to accept love or believe in it or that she deserves it...but whatever, the CT's have confused us plenty!

Yet, hats off to Neha and Kinshuk and the other actors for doing their best with whatever the CT's have given them to work with.  They have been awesome.

You know, I've noticed that at some point, in the recent past (esp around the time of Viren's stay in the Sharma house) NT Dadi, Sarita ji, who is such a phenomenal actor at times seems to not have her heart in some of the scenes she asked to do or lines she's made to deliver.  Perhaps she gets that the CT's are messing things up and doesn't buy what they are making her portray, but being a professional does what she's told, but it shows...

The only hope is that the CT's shift their own understanding of good-ness, and growth and substance, and show us something more consistent and something that rings more true with the characters they themselves had originally crafted.  (sometimes I think HL and CC are the only two characters that have been consistent from the start!!)
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by Cutie-NivRen


Agree with you Zarmeen too I can understand Nivi's present situation as right now her condition is such she is feeling guilty as well as responsible for Dwita and that's why NT dadi was worried today. Nivi is good at heart but is not samajdar because till now we haven't seen any samajdaari from her Ya u can call her obedient child who listen to what elders say but is not samajdaar.
 
But it is not the first time when Nivi put others before Viren. She always does this be it Divya, Sid, family, office or dwita everyone comes before Viren. She has to be shaken up to realise the importance and needs of Viren.
 
On the other hand Viren do loves Nivi start with everything to please her but lose his patience really soon and become insecure instantly like he himself asked her to join office knowing she is really talented but when she got successful he get jealous, now also he gave the responsibility of dwita to Nivi now he is getting insecure when she is involved in the kid.
 
Main problem I have why they don't solve their problems why they always need 3 person interventions to solve their problems. It would have been better instead of Sid lecturing Viren if Nivi herself would have confronted Viren and made him understand. Why her solution revolve around accept what other person wants instead of making them understand what are they trying to do is wrong.
Yaar Rach kahan hai obedient. Nodding head when somebody wants tea is not being obedient. But when VD asked her to go and C if Viren needs anything she simply refused or changed the topic. So for me she is only obedient when she feels like. At the time of DD and S. marriage also Daadi asked her not to be mahaan but she still did not listen to her. At the time of engagement she did not even bothered to talk about to NT daadi of not going through with the engagement whereas she knew that her dad and daadi were super excited. And even after that when NT dadi , yash and S. and VD were trying to make her understand she was adament of getting S. married to DD. Tu kahan hai obedient yaar.
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by zarmeeno


Minu love ur post. But somewhat disagree with u. I have repadly said that that proper test of human beingsare inbad times. And somehow all the main leads of CCBM have failed that. S. failed when Nivi's father and the Sharmas were being blamed. He also failed when Nivi was being continuously blamed in his house and he did not say anything, not even believed her. He only started looking around proofs when he was being blamed. DD failed repeatdly and I dont think so I need to explain anything here as far as DD is concerned. Viren failed when he was revealed as stalker and in his jealousy track which we all know. And honestly for me Nivi has also failed repeatdly. I was totally with her when she stood up against S. and Sharmas and at the wedding and I was like wow RS will show us a girl who will become women of substrance but after that it was totally a downhill of Nivi's character. She was totally obssessed with DD and the likings of S. When VD said that Nivi understands everybody I was like what. SHe is continuously failed to understand her sis, never communicated with her, she has totally failed as a wife as Viren has never been the centre of her attraction. She started concentrating on Viren a bit when DD started getting upset with her for interfering in her and S. life too much. I just dont understand y does she always need toi be shaken up to make her understand what other people want. I know everybody says there r too much expecttations from her character. But if u take it I dont c any sort of samjhdaari in it which they r trying to show. She has never been able to solve any issues or problems. But is the one who always creates them and then comes out of it smoothly that nobody blames her and all the other people get blamed. Even this Bhaiji issue. Kahan yaar shareef ghar ki larkiyaan raat ko milnay jaati hain apnay bhai kay friends kay bhaiyoon say. If she would have communicaated this issue with her father earlier this could have been sorted out by the principal without her even beinginvolved. She always hid DD's mistakes and S. mistakes but openly discuss issues bothering Viren. Instead of talking to him herself she told S. who went and talked to him. It was between husband and wife. Y did she got S. involved. If she would have been samjhdaar she would have understood that S. is now DD's husband and one should let husband and wife resolve their issue and not interfere in them and no wife likes anyother person to tell them what r there husbands liking and dislikings.. But she continuously interfered in their lives. She has been unable to understand CC and her plans yet. Samjhdaari kahan hai uss mein. Honestly for me she is the most Ziididi person. She only does what she wants. So i'm sorry sweetie I somehwat disagree with it. Coz she has always been in guilt and will always be in guilt.


100% agree to what all you just said. I just dont get the reason why Niveditas character is shown so dumd at times. I liked the point you brought up that Nivi has always hid DD and Sids mistakes but openly talked about Virens. I still hate that scene b/w Nivi-Sid before site pooja the way she said "Viren ko pata hoga kya bolna hai client ko" while making that face. Also the other thing which shows her samajhdaari was when she used to ask Sid not to talk to het coz DD gets upset. Arey yaar koi husband ko apni biwi ke baare mein aisa kahoge to rishte kharab hogena. Smart person would known how to handle such situations. Avoid karna aur dusre bande ko pata bhi na chale. But instead she made it obvious to sid that she is avoiding him for dd. She never confides in Viren rather chooses Sid for that. Nivi thinks whatever she does is right no matter if its wrong for the other person. Yet she is mahan. Nivi has never shown any signs of responsibility. It's true what u said that its her ziddi nature and unwanted/ unnecessary interference that has caused troubles for everyone. She is the creator of all problems. Right from sidya marriage to her neglegence towards Viren and over the board attitute for dwita and lack in inability to clarify issues. Imagine she and DD went for months w/o clearing the doubts in DDs brain. Finally DD had to bear the brunt of everything that sid- Nivi did and hided from DD. God alone knows what all she's gonna screw up next
Posted: 12 years ago
@honey berry, that's the thing.  Why do the CT's make such a mess of these things.  Its like they press the buttons on these characters they create to move the story forward (in their view), without caring whether what they are making them do is out of character or not.  Neha, Kinshuk and the others, phans jate hai in CT's ke loops mein.  The early CT's were very good, but midway they changed them and since then things are quite confusing.
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by sana4kinha


 
And viren is so much in love with nivi so tht he want to spend more time with her...it's normal...and bcz of nivi's over attachment with dwita she can't recognise viren's sadness completely,...and viren can't accept the new situation completely...so here neither nivi nor viren is wrong...it's a real life situation...here mutual understanding and support is needed...hope the CT's will not mess up with the whole track..and i want a confrontation btw nivren...they have to solve their problems by themselves..marriage is not a smooth path...it may have thorns too...so nivren have to overcome all the difficulties and we all want  to see nivren happy...!!


Sana dear, thank you for your sweet comments. 

What you write above it so true.  There has to be a confrontation perhaps.  Or will the elders be able to wake Nivi up?  I wish they would show these two resolving it on their own.  Lets see what we get.  Really want them to overcome their problems and come out stronger.

Are you going to get any more of your scenes, Sana?  Love them!
Posted: 12 years ago
Brilliant analysis 👏
Patiently waiting for the 'zor ka jhatka' 😉
Posted: 12 years ago
I actually agree with you Minu. I love the Viren before stalking revealiation as that Viren was more selfless, more determined to get what he wants, more patient while dealing with Nivi, He knew Nivi more than this Viren, He had no great expectations from Nivi. That was multitasker Viren. Yaar in hatred he was more understanding and insightful regarding all the character that we were planning to give him CID job.
 
I agree with Zarmeen here that CT's had made Nivi's character stubborn in a way that she thinks what she does is correct and her immidiate loved ones should accept her decision. Like initially she herself took decision regarding her, Sid and Divya. At that time I was completely against that idea because you can sacrifice from ur front how can u expect sacrifice from other like u did Later we found it correct due to keshav confrontations and many incidents after that caused hatred for Sid in my mind. Because Sid could never stood up for right that was his basic flaw.
 
After wedding when she use to run after DD and Sid I use to consider it is really tough for her to immidiately accepts Viren as husband and she really needs time for that. Then Viren was revealed as stalker then I thought she is right as Viren needs to teach a lesson. After she left her was also a good decision. So till that point we gave her benefit of circumstances.
 
But CT's showed her behaviour towards Viren is same even when she returned back whole heartedely with Viren after understanding that he has changed and how much he loves her. She still continue to give importance to other more than him, be it Yash thing, office, DD issues and now dwita. She put each and everything above Viren. In the end she needs a wake up call to know yes Viren too needs me. But I hate the most when somehow CT's involved Sid in between husband wife insecurity matter. Firstly they shouldn't have started the track but if they did then it should be between NivRen to solve the matter without intervention of Sid atleast. 
Edited by Cutie-NivRen - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by Cutie-NivRen


I actually agree with you Minu. I love the Viren before stalking revealiation as that Viren was more selfless, more determined to get what he wants, more patient while dealing with Nivi, He knew Nivi more than this Viren, He had no great expectations from Nivi. That was multitasker Viren. Yaar in hatred he was more understanding and insightful regarding all the character that we were planning to give him CID job.

 
But CT's showed her behaviour towards Viren is same even when she returned back whole heartedely with Viren after understanding that he has changed and how much he loves her. She still continue to give importance to other more than him, be it Yash thing, office, DD issues and now dwita. She put each and everything above Viren. In the end she needs a wake up call to know yes Viren too needs me. But I hate the most when somehow CT's involved Sid in between husband wife insecurity matter. Firstly they shouldn't have started the track but if they did then it should be between NivRen to solve the matter without intervention of Sid atleast. 


Rachu, I agree with what you say here, especially the first paragraph - you've hit the nail on the head.  That Viren was really so mature, so able to listen, understand, be eternally patient, selfless and so loving.  I still can't get over the amazing way he told Nivi after he came back from Delhi right after their marriage and saved her from his mom...that you have to look at yourself through my eyes to see the beauty that I see -- duniya ki sabse khoobsurat ladki tumhare saamne kucch nahi hai. and how he told her that the family that could produce someone like her could never be 'lowly.'  Wasn't that amazingly mature, and heartfelt? And the awesome wedding confrontation statements of his, and many epis later when he tells Nivi that its not about fighting with my family, its about right and wrong.  If they are wrong, I am not with them...So that is why I could not buy that he was the actual stalker.  So you're right, from that Viren to this one is a real leap.  Even last week he was so mature and understand and totally got what it is that will get through to Nivi - Dwita. No one else thinks of it, he does.  So why show him so shaky about it now...it doesn't ring true.

I also see what zarmeen and you say about how CT's have shown Nivi to be more ziddi than samajhdar.  And about the 3rd party communication.  As I've said before I think the CT's keep dragging the Sid Nivi angle because they think that will keep the viewers guessing and will be good for the show!  Wierd thinking.  They could well have shown Sid and Nivi's relationship changing as they both moved forward...

So I hope they allow Nivi and Viren to resolve this current dilemma by themselves. They could get a nudge from DS who sends Nivi with Viren, but then they should talk and hash it out.
Posted: 12 years ago
Agree Minu
They start out with mature, understanding Viren and in between show some point where he is more mature and understanding. I loved how DS gave the lecture about the relation in which 2 are important and 3rd one will always remain 3rd person how good he is. We so wish now in 9 mths they had gone together they would have become mature in their relation, more understanding about each other feelings and problems.
 
Yesterday Viren's anger was justified when he came home and saw Nivi hasn't ate food too while taking care of Dwita. Feeling bad is ok anyone will feel bad with negligiance how much ever he love his spouse. But he should be that understanding to not be fall in CC's trap and start doubting Nivi as he knows her better than anyone else. I don't want them to make him thinking so lowly about his brother and wife what CC has been trying really hard. Last time it was DD who never understood anyone other than herself and this time it is Viren who understand Nivi the most so I want this understanding to play role and CC should be a failure this time.
Posted: 12 years ago
Rachu -- you know I was struck by the fact that they have at least shown that Viren is making a lot of effort to understand the situation, stay above the fray, and to resist his mother's lecture bazi.  And for her part Nivi has always been so sweet with him, despite her focus on Dwita, they haven't shown her getting irritated or anything - and he sees that.  The few moments that they have shared have been sweet, even if short, and soon interrupted.  So hopefully they'll show a more mature viren, not perfect, but at least someone who knows his wife well enough to not get taken in by his mom's instigation.  But well before that I hope DS and the rest pack them off to the resort!

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