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Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems
Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems

A peacock's melancholy

Myrrah Newbie
Myrrah
Myrrah

Joined: 13 May 2011
Posts: 2

Posted: 16 May 2011 at 1:17am | IP Logged
An attempt to write poetry, spare the length. Written in a jiffy, this is the first time I have attempted to write a verse. Do the needful. 

~A peacock's melancholy

The familiar fresh air beckons me
and my shadow dances with the tune..
Every raindrop rhymes with my heartbeat!
I plead to you...O' Bird catcher. 
for the sake of humanity, 
Let me go...
Set me free! 
For I am a peacock, waiting to shun the sunshine. 
To flaunt a mannequin of feathers...
To feel the pride, in a season that's mine. 
My agony bubbles up and withers away! 
I watch the rain with a sharp pang of dismay. 
I envy the eagle, flying high. 
and the frog, who hopped and hopped and passed by. 
Also the tree...waving along!
and the clouds and thunder, 
Together they compose a song. 
Listen thou, Bird catcher.. 
No matter how much money the king may pay,
it will never have you satisfied 
For I am a peacock, the messenger of god.  
You'll be punished for the thousands deaths I have died. 

Original verse by :-
Myrrah

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

Wanderbugmjtruelegend

Sur_10 Goldie
Sur_10
Sur_10

Joined: 23 August 2009
Posts: 1811

Posted: 16 May 2011 at 3:09am | IP Logged
Hey
This is a nice bit of poetry. Pretty different from the stuff usually found here. Do keep posting more of your verses. 
Sur
Myrrah Newbie
Myrrah
Myrrah

Joined: 13 May 2011
Posts: 2

Posted: 16 May 2011 at 3:23am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Sur_Singhania

Hey
This is a nice bit of poetry. Pretty different from the stuff usually found here. Do keep posting more of your verses. 
Sur

Thank you for the comment, Sur. I will try to write more, I guess. If this comes out fine, I will write more on nature, Maybe.


Edited by Myrrah - 16 May 2011 at 3:24am
ammygurl IF-Dazzler
ammygurl
ammygurl

Joined: 22 November 2008
Posts: 4380

Posted: 16 May 2011 at 8:58am | IP Logged
Hello Myrrah. 
This is a nice first time attempt. A peacock's side of story is never EVER portrayed here, IS it? 
Well, as far as I have perceived, the verse is abrupt, is it not? The verse could have been stretched... more, I believe. Nevertheless, It is good and simply fine for a first time attempt, as you write it. 
 Cheers, 
Ananya
mjtruelegend IF-Rockerz
mjtruelegend
mjtruelegend

Joined: 24 January 2009
Posts: 8921

Posted: 18 May 2011 at 4:33am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Myrrah

An attempt to write poetry, spare the length. Written in a jiffy, this is the first time I have attempted to write a verse. Do the needful. 

~A peacock's melancholy

The familiar fresh air beckons me
and my shadow dances with the tune..
Every raindrop rhymes with my heartbeat!
I plead to you...O' Bird catcher. 
for the sake of humanity, 
Let me go...
Set me free! 
For I am a peacock, waiting to shun the sunshine. 
To flaunt a mannequin of feathers...
To feel the pride, in a season that's mine. 
My agony bubbles up and withers away! 
I watch the rain with a sharp pang of dismay. 
I envy the eagle, flying high. 
and the frog, who hopped and hopped and passed by. 
Also the tree...waving along!
and the clouds and thunder, 
Together they compose a song. 
Listen thou, Bird catcher.. 
No matter how much money the king may pay,
it will never have you satisfied 
For I am a peacock, the messenger of god.  
You'll be punished for the thousands deaths I have died. 

Original verse by :-
Myrrah
 
Wow that was beautiful. Loved it. Really, really well done.Clap
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