Saath Nibhaana Saathiya


Saath Nibhaana Saathiya
Saath Nibhaana Saathiya

Dumbness or Lack of self-confidence

taral83 IF-Dazzler

Joined: 20 August 2006
Posts: 3592

Posted: 11 May 2011 at 9:10pm | IP Logged
There seems to be many post about Gopi being "dumb". Why? Only because she can't spill out a full sentence without stuttering? Or because she falls in the trap of methi churi like Rashi? or because she can't think for herself? or because she has to remember things people have told her? The list is endless. But let me point out somethings...

Gopi stutters not because she is dumb, but she has always been yelled at when she has said something. Chup ek dum Chup!!! She has heard it from Rashi, Urmi, Koki and Ahem. over and over and over again. This can kill anyone's confidence. The poor girl didn't have much confidence to begin with. Its human nature. Think about it, if you suggested something to your boss but was completely put down or bashed for the so called "bad" suggestion, won't you think twice to open your mouth again? My father is really strict, we had to ask him before we did everything ( and I am glad he raised me that way) I would stutter many times because I wasn't confident in what I was about to ask. Does that mean I am dumb also?

Gopi is very naive. She has lived in the four walls Urmi's house, doing nothing but housework. Her only little window to the outside world was Panna, a young child that had lots to learn herself. Gopi is under the assumption that her mami loves her and her sister love her. Urmi and Rashi also play a major role in the lack of confidence Gopi has because they have told her over and over that she is good for nothing. I agree, sometimes I really wish Gopi would just think a little, but that is who she is, she doesn't see anything negative in anyone. She think that everyone is as good hearted as she is because her world was those 4 walls. Even if Anita came today and asked her to leave Ahem for her, she would do it in a heart beat. Her happiness lies in the happiness of others. If you listen to her, every time she talks to herself to raise her confidence, she always says "I will have to be strong for Maji" or "I have to do this for Ahemji" Nothing is ever for Gopi. And because she doesn't think about herself she falls in trouble herself. Dumb? No...over Naive...maybe?

Gopi actually is very smart, she thinks much faster then many of the family. She has solved many problems, one including Rashi when she forgot to pay the electric bill. She even recently in Ahem's birthday first thought about making a rangoli, later changed the thought because of Rashi suggestion and Gopi's lack of confidence once again. So its not that she doesn't think or doesn't have a brain, she lacks confidence to pursue that thought.

I read in one of the topic that Gopi always has to remember what someone directed to her before she does it. I couldn't help but laugh...LOL If trying to remember what you were suppose to do is called dumb...then I should get 1st place. Darn I forget what I did yesterday sometimes because of work and house hold stuff. LOL I have to make a list of things I have to get done so I remember. Wait...Gopi can't write...ahhh she memorizes everything...if I tried that, I would be not typing right now cause I would have no electricity like Rashi did...LOL...

There is a fine line between dumb, naive, innocent, or just a bit slow. I am not saying Gopi is smart, but I wouldn't call her dumb either. She falls somewhere in the middle for me. But a lot of what she is today is because of the verbal and mental abuse she has received from Urmi, Rashi Koki and Ahem. How smart she really is only time will tell...Embarrassed

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Snowwhite50 Senior Member

Joined: 06 May 2011
Posts: 202

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 12:38am | IP Logged
Clap   Clap Ya she lacks confidence

Edited by Snowwhite50 - 12 May 2011 at 1:02am
ladydivine Groupbie

Joined: 30 August 2010
Posts: 193

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 12:50am | IP Logged
I completely agree with you that what she is today is the result of what she went through. But I still cannot support the character entirely because she is too trusting of the people who caused her harm. Good example is Rashi. Gopi has been told on and on by Koki not to trust that lady. Also she has been warned not to mingle much with her. Are we seeing her listening to Koki? Nope. And that is really annoying.  If she does not stop going near Rashi she will not get closer to Ahem.

We all know what Rashi wants. Also Gopi knows that she got trapped many times in trouble because of that girl. Yet no lesson learned! 

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-Nafisa- IF-Stunnerz

Joined: 07 December 2010
Posts: 34720

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 1:14am | IP Logged
Wow Tara what a tirade ...LOL, I know what has prompted it, but like lady divine says she should learn from her mistakes too, Rashi always gets her in trouble, but whenever she suggests something she quickly does that thing, why not think wait a minute what does she want to get out of it, it's a simple thought what's in it for her that's it. Everything she has had to do at Urmila's house was to make Rashi comfortable and happy, now when Kokila chose her, how did Rashi react, when she went to say sorry, I don't forgive you, but she is constantly covering up Rashi's mistakes, I'm telling you now Tara she better not do it with the dung today if she does I swear she is dumb, after all that speaking the truth crap, she better speak up today.

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atop IF-Rockerz

Joined: 29 May 2007
Posts: 6477

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 1:46am | IP Logged
That was just a wonderful analysis and very insightful detail into basic character sketch of Gopi..Clap
Truly thought provoking and justified but though I do agree with your points, I do maintain that despite everything else there surely needs to be a development in her not a big one but very small so that she does get to understand few of the things. It surely is not appealing to see her fall for the traps so very easily and then bear brunts of everyone.
Her character needs to be developed in bits and pieces and not in terms of transformation but in terms of improvement.

Luv atop

Edited by atop - 12 May 2011 at 1:47am

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Aamnakideewani IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 09 July 2005
Posts: 10246

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 2:06am | IP Logged
exactly this is my point she is not dumb  she dnt have confidence !

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bips IF-Dazzler

Joined: 22 April 2005
Posts: 4872

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 2:37am | IP Logged
If it was a simple matter of low self esteem or lack of confidence, Gopi would at least THINK of something intelligent, just not have the courage to act on it.

Lack of self confidence is not equal to lack of awareness ... They have stretched her naivety to the point of foolishness  ...

urmilla and rashi pretend to be nice to gopi in front of others but when its just the tree of them, they are pretty rude ... So how come no warning bells ring in her brain that something is wrong

... Here is the thing, had gopi been sheltered, protected and loved all her life, this sab-log-bahut-achche hain attitude would make sense ... because if you have just seen goodness and love, you cannot understand evil  ...  but how can someone who has been abused and taken advantage of all her life not realise that the person doesn't really care about them

The fact that she doesn't do anything about all the kalakari does not make her dumb ... but the fact that she does not even believe that something wrong is happening makes her foolish

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suk19 IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 12 March 2010
Posts: 16507

Posted: 12 May 2011 at 2:39am | IP Logged
Tara thank you a wonderful analysis,  Gopi lacks confidence but the one place she doesnt is the  mandir.  If you noticed yesterday she was confident speaking to priest. she sought solace in her religion thats her comfort zone. 

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