DOTW: Love and Trust Issues - Page 2

This content was originally posted by: Chill_Out

Reserved :)

-Edited-

Kanks, first of all, a good topic of discussion. You really didn't miss much yesterday and I'd say it's good you waited till today to open this discussion.

If I had waited another three days, I could have made the Pia-Maithali discussion. 😆

Love and trust go hand in hand. In any relationship, in fact, a certain level of trust is required. But then, trust is dependent on another factor as well: truth and it's communication. I never really followed KZK too closely but I remember catching this episode where Anurag and Prerna have an argument over what the basis of a relationship is: Truth or trust? I'd say the foundation of any relationship has to be trust but for that trust to be maintained, truth is essential.

I agree with you mostly on this. Truth's vitally the sickest thing to extract out of people, even your significant other at times. If truth lays the foundation to trust and all that you put it, Pia does not have many ideas of Abhay's truth, which is why just maybe, her distrust in him is reasonable for now. 

Honestly, I am disappointed in Pia today not because she's angry at Abhay or because she said hurtful things to him but simply because she never gave Abhay a chance to explain himself. Her reaction is human, like you said. She's angry because she feels betrayed but more than that, I think she's angry at the fact that she can't help her father when he needs her. She blames Abhay for that because she needs someone to blame. Rani pointed this out in another thread that maybe what's frustrating her more than betrayal is helplessness. Can't say that for sure, though. 

She did not give Abhay a chance to explain, true. How I see it is this - you'd forgive feloniousness out of your loved one too, if they are decaying or fatal against you, there are chances you'd still let them in and give them a 'fair' chance to explain, which may or may not be deserved. But then, Pia was saturated at the time, and that speaks for itself - you can't think beyond yourself for literally anybody sometimes. She was exasperated and enveloped in serious anger, betrayal and shit like that. Hence, she never let Abhay explain. However, if you still see her - her manner tells you she's on her way to reckon, she never intended to not love Abhay after that. 

Pia has been betrayed, there are no arguments there but what complicates the situation is that Abhay didn't really betray her. This is where truth as the root of trust comes in. Regardless of Sid and his threats, Abhay should've long back told Pia about Sid's reality and even the bite. Today, the truth came out for Pia in the wrong way. It shouldn't have been like this. Abhay would've been able to bring the truth out in the right way, thus, having a Pia who had the state of mind to understand what made him bite her instead of a Pia who is betrayed and so blinded with anger that she doesn't even want to listen to Abhay's side of the story. 

Pia, easily, said that she can't trust Abhay because 'animals' aren't suppose to be trusted. She does appear to be insecure regarding Abhay's identity. She does trust Abhay, even today, but what she doesn't trust is the harsh reality which comes with Abhay's identity. She needs to be more involved in Abhay's world to understand it. That is the only solution to her insecurities and the only person who can help her there is Abhay, himself. 

Yeah? Yeah. You make sense. 

Coming to your question, I'd like to highlight the word 'enough' in it. 'Enough' trust. Some trust is required. If there is proper communication and openness, the 'enough' factor will automatically be attained and lack of communication will lead to betrayal, whether intentional or unintentional. But love will always be there. So I guess it's a YES from me as well.

You see what my drift is over here? Guess you do. Love's like shitty and self-destructive, we can't get through without it, sadly but it happens under any circumstances and sometimes, it manages to get out of the wire-gauge kind of thing designed by agents like distrust and lies, it just fights its way out. Sick thing. 

A bit sorry for beating around the bush. I don't even know how much sense it made, anyway but I hope I managed to answer the question you were trying to ask :)

You made enough sense to me, N. Yes, you answered. Cheers! 

Awaiting your reply!

This content was originally posted by: abhayfan_dishu

I completely agree with you. Its possible to love someone with everything u have but yet not trust him completely. In real life it is especially true if a person has experienced betrayal earlier. So, a person may enter into a new relationship and love the person completely, but their past will always held them back from trusting the person completely.

This content was originally posted by: IndigoBlues

Hey kanky..😊

I think what you're trying to say is that when people think they have been betrayed in love, all that talk of 'i trust you' disappears right? 😆 Sorry, I'm a bit dense nowadays. 😆

Not necessarily, Megha. Sometimes, they are distressed beyond imagination, sometimes they are really broken and sometimes they are already sacred of the whole institution of it, like what would it be like to fall prey to somebody again, anybody. 

I think that well, personal experience, when you love someone, and you have a very low self-worth of yourself...when that person betrays you you are ready to accept it because subconsciously that was what you were fearing all along and you were prepared for it. That 'jaanwar' wala dialogue was not something that just came out of pia's mouth, it was almost rehearsed.  When you're angry you let out incoherent rubbish at times, but not such a hard-hitting dialogue. 😆 It was as if this is what her Fear (that part of her mind that makes her afraid of things) had perceived Abhay to be.  In fact it even shows that Piya had never accepted Abhay being a vampire fully...because she was disgusted at the thought of being a vampire-not horrified or confused, mind you, disgusted.

I know the personal experience thing you highlighted, I have been through a reminiscent situation, not particularly but the betrayal was expected a lot. Hence, I agree with you, Pia never really totally got into terms with Abhay's real identity in the sense. She was disgusted. She knows what loving Abhay means. 

BUT, I don't blame Pia. When she came to Dehradun, she was this orphaned girl with no one of her own, and the one person who she thought had the potential of being someone like that-Abhay-kept on playing see-saw with her emotions. 😆 Once he was a jerk, once he was sweet. Secondly, even when she was accepted, Misha was angry with her, and again Abhay provided her emotional comfort. Abhay is just like a teenage fantasy-mysterious dark young man with a past and who can be kind and loving when he wants to-and she felt him too good to be true, hence the complete loss of trust. Otherwise, if she did have an ounce of trust left, she would have listened to Abhay. 😆

In problematic issues such as these, you can't really blame one and be biased, but you always do share a connect with one of the parties, it could be empathy or sympathy or just a profound skill of understanding people's thought process. Abhay, yes. I like how you put him across, this ain't anything I've heard about Abhay Raichand before. 

Love,

Megz.

(sorry for rambling, I KNOW I went off-topic. 😆)

This content was originally posted by: mijanur

i completly agree with.piya loves abhay.but in sub conscious mind she can't fully accept abhay as a vampire.in her mind she still has the memory of betrayal.but i am afraid that piya has done a long term damage in their relationship by calling him janwar.i think it wil bother abhay in future to accept her love.it will reminds him they are diffrent.he can also think piya can have some problem in their relationship in future about his vampire identity.but i hope piya will soon realise why abhay have to done this.but this time i want to see a more intelgent,clam & over all a new piya who has more trust on abhay.i want she make belive abhay in the fact that,its means nothing they are diffrent they always meant to be together.

This content was originally posted by: hreeyaa

ya trust is really needed in all relationship..we sud trust the person whom we love dearly...bt sometimes over trust may hurt us!

This content was originally posted by: -Kanky-

If I had waited another three days, I could have made the Pia-Maithali discussion. 😆

True! Maybe next time 😉

I agree with you mostly on this. Truth's vitally the sickest thing to extract out of people, even your significant other at times. If truth lays the foundation to trust and all that you put it, Pia does not have many ideas of Abhay's truth, which is why just maybe, her distrust in him is reasonable for now. 

Exactly! You got the whole point I was trying to make :)

She did not give Abhay a chance to explain, true. How I see it is this - you'd forgive feloniousness out of your loved one too, if they are decaying or fatal against you, there are chances you'd still let them in and give them a 'fair' chance to explain, which may or may not be deserved. But then, Pia was saturated at the time, and that speaks for itself - you can't think beyond yourself for literally anybody sometimes. She was exasperated and enveloped in serious anger, betrayal and shit like that. Hence, she never let Abhay explain. However, if you still see her - her manner tells you she's on her way to reckon, she never intended to not love Abhay after that. 

I agree with what you're saying, Kanks and I know that despite everything, Pia still loves Abhay but for someone who's always wanted and thrived on truth, her behaviour seemed out of order. And if not that time because of shock or whatever, maybe later? And who gave her the right to go and tell all that to Sid? And she doesn't even listen to Haseena. She's being plain unreasonable on that front despite being justified

Yeah? Yeah. You make sense. 

I do? Thanks 😆

You see what my drift is over here? Guess you do. Love's like shitty and self-destructive, we can't get through without it, sadly but it happens under any circumstances and sometimes, it manages to get out of the wire-gauge kind of thing designed by agents like distrust and lies, it just fights its way out. Sick thing. 

Lies and distrust are fatal to any bond but if the love and understanding is proper, they will ultimately pass :)

You made enough sense to me, N. Yes, you answered. Cheers! 

Thanks! 

Awaiting your reply!

Here you go! 😃

This content was originally posted by: Chill_Out

 

Hey kanky before I say something on your topic. I have a confession, in you previous discussion lizz told senseless on forum. So bear with my reply.

It is not necessary that If u love someone then you need to trut them. Like according to me love at first sight. In love at first sight can you trust someone immediately? No defo not. Trust grows up with time. Love and trust are very complex words which holds different meaning in everyone's dictionalry. And one can discuss them endlessly.

LOVE-when u r ready to forego everything to whom you love

TRUST-when you believe in someone

I know in above my def of love most of people will no agre but like I said that everyone hols different meaning because of there complexity. So according to me it is not necessary that you need to trust someone for love.

And like you said that love is dependant on situations. I guess this is the perfect line for love and trust both because as the situation changes the defination of trust and love also changes. So love and trust totally depends on person to person pluc conditions.

I hope u will be able to read my crap :P

p.s- my  apologies for late reply

This content was originally posted by: sanjna4

Hey kanky before I say something on your topic. I have a confession, in you previous discussion lizz told senseless on forum. So bear with my reply.

Come again, what do you mean? 🤔

It is not necessary that If u love someone then you need to trut them. Like according to me love at first sight. In love at first sight can you trust someone immediately? No defo not. Trust grows up with time. Love and trust are very complex words which holds different meaning in everyone's dictionalry. And one can discuss them endlessly.

LOVE-when u r ready to forego everything to whom you love

TRUST-when you believe in someone

I know in above my def of love most of people will no agre but like I said that everyone hols different meaning because of there complexity. So according to me it is not necessary that you need to trust someone for love.

And like you said that love is dependant on situations. I guess this is the perfect line for love and trust both because as the situation changes the defination of trust and love also changes. So love and trust totally depends on person to person pluc conditions.

Well, babe you know, love at first sight is a belief which is extremely hypothetical, somebody may catch your attention at their very first sight, due to any reason but anyhow, it is less likely to be love in any aspect of it. Also, I agree with you that sometimes, love and trust are not necessary to hail together. And it depends upon the criticalness of the situation. 

I hope u will be able to read my crap :P

Not that bad, hun. 

p.s- my  apologies for late reply

No problem.