Posted: 04 May 2011 at 7:03pm | IP Logged
i don't think he's selfish, I totally understand the pressure he was under - happened in my family once and the person ended up getting a divorce. Blame was thrown around on everyone, but in the end - two lives were permanently impacted, negatively.
That said, he IS the sole person responsible. I think he should NOT have married Vidya. I don't care how hard the pressure. I KNOW what the pressure is like, and I know how easy it is to cave in, and I also know you end up resenting the other party. The nicer they are, the more you resent them. BUT, he is immature in his way of handling her. He's polite to her, yes. He's not abusive, yes. But mostly, he was misleading her. Marriage is not a contract you enter in lightly. He knew he loved someone else, but she didn't. I don't care what his mother, father, family did/said/threatened him with. HE singlehandedly, in the end, is responsible for Vidya's state today. Not his mother, who btw is a very very very guilty party here also, but in the end, Gaurav could have stood up to her and said no, I won't marry her. It would have been better that way, lesser of the two evils. But hindsight is 20/20 and all.
Similary, much as I feel Devyani is very much at fault, I can see a mother trying to right a wrong here. That's exactly what happened in my family - all well intentions, no one trying to hurt anyone, but in the end, when ONE of the two ppl going into a relationship don't want to be there, it is doomed from the start.
Maryada is doing a great job touching and exploring this topic. This happens a lot in our society - coerced marriages I mean. I have 3 friends who were married right out of college with guys who were great looking, made good money, came from great families and were in general decent folks. All 3 ended up in divorces, coz at the end of the day a degree is not what you're marrying - your minds and personalities have to match. If you force a match, more often than not, it will go awry. And that's what's happening in Maryada.
It's a bad situation - I undersatnd Gaurav's pressure and how/why he ended up doing what he did. I understand Devyani's stand in all this, she was thinking this will actually fix things and possibly make his son move on in life and get settled (have seen it happen in many cases, so can't blame her for hoping that). And mostly, I feel Vidya's pain - she was the only innocent party in all this. And the most hurt.
Maybe, we can blame all of this on Brahmanan Chakhar. Had he not neglected his son so much, Gaurav may have found it easier to approach his parents about the girl he loves, and may not have been forced to marry someone else to begin with ...
lets see what unfolds - all in all - I'm loving how this show touches upon so many real issues in our lives, yet does it so dramatically. Love it.