Indifference and Forgiveness vs Anger and Hatred

Opti thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

"Indifference speaks louder than anger" is  a music track by Goonies Never Say Die  from the album No words to voice our hopes and fear.  How true it is.

 
They say indifference is more dangerous than anger and hatred because when one is angry  there is still the acknowledgement of the person or persons existence but with indifference  one neither recognises nor cares if his/her adversary exists or not, as he/she does not hold any value to him/her.  As long you hold on to the feelings that someone else's actions/words has evoked,  you end up hurting yourself. Once you let go, you are free. 
 
 
At present, Geet is indifferent to Dev. He does not exist for her. Dev's pseudo guilt is, therefore, not assuaged and that is why he is an unhappy soul.
 
 

Now we hear that Geet might forgive Dev. We don't know  if this is true and if it is,  the circumstances under which she forgives or what this forgiveness entails but I thought I'll address some of the allegations levied against Geet for her purported intent to forgive Dev . 

 
1. Fallacy: Geet forgiving Dev is unthinkable because it would mean a victory for him.
 

Fact:  

"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much." - Oscar Wilde
 
 
 
From what I have seen of Dev, the guy loves to wallow in pseudo guilt and self flagellation. As long as Geet and Maan do not accept his remorse, he has a reason to keep crying to Dadi that he has wronged and his bro and his bhabhi can never forgive him.  If Geet forgives him, he loses that reason.  I think without a 'whip' to hit himself, he will feel lost.
 

2. Fallacy: Geet's forgiveness would portray her as a weak character.

 
Fact:
 
 
 "The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."- Mahatma Gandhi
 
 
 
Geet is a strong woman and her strength would only increase with this forgiveness.
 
 
3. Fallacy: Geet's forgiveness would mean that she has forgotten everything done to her by Dev.
 
 
Fact:

"The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget." - Thomas S. Szasz, a Hungarian psychiatrist.

 
Just because Geet forgives Dev does not mean she has forgotten what he did.  She will, therefore, never accept him.  Forgiving him would only help her remove the bitterness of hatred in her soul.
 
 

We do not know whether Dev is really repentant or just pretending to be so.  If he is only pretending, then he can always plan to harm Maaneet in the present or future.  Since Geet does not know for sure whether Dev's remorse is genuine, it would be better if she always remains vigilant where he is concerned, even if she has forgiven him.

 
 
Edited to add:
 
Granting Dev forgiveness does not mean he should escape from law.  Here Dev has gone against the law and has been charged of a heinous crime.  He is still out only on bail and has not been totally acquitted (at least that is my understanding). Let law take its own course.
Edited by Opti - 13 years ago

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Mehek25 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
A very good post. I agree with all the "facts" u have quoted. i always believe in one thing....U can forgive a person for all/any wrong he/she may have done to u, but u can never ever forget the wrongs done to u...so even if Geet forgives him she will never forget the wrong he has done to her.
spshastr thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Opti 👏 
 
To err is human and to forgive is divine
 
Opti it takes a lot of strength to forgive a person who has wronged you like Dev has but then I agree if she has to live in the same house what is the use of the hatred? SHe should not forget😊
Edited by spshastr - 13 years ago
jyoti06 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Woww this is a post which really made me see the other side of the coin especially the way u hv used those perfect phrases with the current situation👏👏
 
 
The moral of the story is forgiveness is not equal to forgetting everything👍🏼....Also we dunno the context under which Geet will forgive Dev if at all she forgives him as per the articles.....and forgiving someone does not make one weak but it goes on to show the strength of character of that person and somewhere makes the real culprit more guilty of what he did...
 
 
Opti I hv pasted your link on the FB page as well where many feel Geet's character is weak just because she might forgive her culprit....
-Elfin- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
though i want donkey to rot in hell/jail forever.............but what you wrote is fantastic and one of the most intelligent and thought provoking posts ever..................

brilliant to say the least.....................👏
sana_ar thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
Great post!!! It is so true! 
serialwatcher16 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

Opti

When a point of view is different from ours, we at first reject it but then the seed of the thought is sown the moment we read it and then the idea germinates and then comes acceptance of that POV.

I really loved your post and the way you have put the whole thing across. So I am ready to go the forgiveness but not forgetting route just so Geet heals herself and only for her own sake.

And i love this 

"The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget." - Thomas S. Szasz, a Hungarian psychiatrist.

It is excellent. 👏

Arwenish thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

whatever you write is true and i really liked it........... but i just cant bear the idea of Geet forgiving Dev for his crime...........be it be perceptoion or suggestions...........for few deeds which people do their is no forgiveness.......... being indifferent and angry are different things i agree........ i loved Geet being indiferent towards Dev till now........ but i just cant even bear to think the idea of Geet forgiving Dev ( as mentioned in article) under any earthly reason........... Dev crime has potrayed him as the most hateful character and i m still not satisfied with all his sainthood....... he did not get any punishment compared to the magnitude of his crime......... blaming Naiantara for his black deeds completely potrayas the weakness of a loser...... beacuse loser always blame other for every wrong doings...... Naintara i accept was blot on womenhood but she never asked Dev to sleep with Geet....... He did just that out from his lust....... ruined an inocent life.......... and now because of his pashtawa he should be forgiven........ no way......... 

 i love all the quotes you quoted..........

 
I love Geet indifference rather than anger....... as this shows she has move on in life......... Dev at present is not her enemy so how her forgiveness will annoy him????? wise people forgive and dont forget but we still dont know about Deva's true colors.........
RajeevGurtiFan thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
very good opti..i agree from what i have seen geet is totally indifferent to devil(we crazies call him that)...for her devil don't exists..
whether geet will forgive or not remains to be seen as most of the articles don't turn out to be true....
forgiveness does not mean she will forget or accept him...
thanks dear for showing us the other side of the coin...
49erFan thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Wow Opti, very very nice!  I bow down to ur writing!  Admire and love it!