'The pain of letting your love go can be unbearable' - Kamya Punjabi

On a rare one to one with IF reporter Minnie, Kamya comes clean on Nimay Bali, being the second woman in a man's life, playing the vamp, and about love and companionship. Read on...

Wednesday, November 14, 2007 | 8:30:23 AM IST (+05:30 GMT)
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Kamya Punjabi shot into fame with her portrayal of Kiran in 'Astitve ek prem kahani' after Neeru Bajwa stepped out of the role. Next came Kamya in 'Woh Rehne Wali Mehelon Ki', but her majestic performance as Sindurra in 'Banoo Main Teri Dulhan' has caught the attention of the average telly lover world wide.

How does it feel to play a vamp on television?

I am an actor. I love portraying a range of emotions. I am impulsive and get under the skin of the character, to the extent that I start living it. I get lost in that so much so, that it wears me out at times.

Any incident that you remember which scares you?

Yes, once I was shooting this fire scene, and I was so engrossed that I did not notice that a fire pole was hanging right above my head ready to fall on me. The timely action of the people on the sets saved me. That was scary.

Which role have you enjoyed playing the most?

I have enjoyed most of the roles, but Sindurra is closest to my heart. It has given me the fame and recognition, I always craved for. It's amazing how much people hate me, which means I am doing something right at least. The appreciation that I get amazes me, and I can't be thankful enough for that.

Going back to Astitva days, how was it stepping into the established role of Kiran played so convincingly by Neeru Bajwa?

It was tough. Neeru had given a definite face to Kiran in Astitva, and it was a touch career choice to make. But the whole Astitva team - Varun, Ajay Sinha and most importantly Nikki Aneja, they made me feel so comfortable on the sets. Ajayji always told me that this is not a negative character, but it's someone who is in love, and you can't help choose who you fall in love with.

And how much did you identify with Kiran?

To me, she was a normal innocent girl who fell in love with the wrong man. I would always think that what was her fault? You can't choose whom you fall in love with ! I always would think why does the second woman always have to be bad! But as I said, Ajay ji would always sit with me and explain gently.

But the character did turn totally negative and bad.

Yes, that was the demand of the story. Reel life differs from real life there. In real life, decisions are not taken this easily. True that you can't choose to fall in love, afterall if you could, would you not choose the richest and the most handsome guy on the block? But in reality, much more goes into things beyond your love for a person.

Didn't Astitva's Kiran's circumstances eerily reflect what happened to you shortly after ?

Yes. My life was so similar to what Kiran's life was in Astitva. I fell in love with a married man with a daughter. But to be honest, me and Nimay ( Nimay Bali) never really dated each other as such. He was my best friend in the whole wide world. Love simply followed. I believe that more than anything else, your partner should be your best friend.

So what went wrong?

I guess I am meant to be unlucky in love. I was married before ( Kamya was married to light designer Bunty Negi), but it didn't work out. Then Nimay came into my life. I won't go into the problems he was having in his married life at that point, but we came close and fell in love. We were each other's sounding board, and shared everything. But life does not always go as planned. He had a family to go back to, and perhaps eventually ironed out the problems he had with his wife. He has a daughter, and I can't be so selfish that I hang onto something at the cost of somebody else's happiness. I still love Nimay, but more than that, I miss the friend in him. I am sure he still loves me, and misses me. But life has to move on.

Did the tag of being a second woman bother you?

It's not easy, I admit. The pain, the alienation that one has to go through is beyond description. Yet it's better than the heartbreak that follows. In the earlier stage, you have your partner to share the pain, and the happy moments you spend are worth it. But the loneliness of heartbreak gets to you.

Have you moved on?

Yes and no. I have gotten myself immersed in work. My work is what keeps me going. Without my work, I would have died. The pain of letting of your love go is too painful, too unbearable to describe. And man, can I feel the pain!

Are you willing to love again?

After I separated from Bunty, my husband, I had decided that I would not get into any relationship. Yet within two months I was head over heels with Nimay. Life is seldom planned. So right now, I am single, ready to mingle. Ready to fall in love again - and this time, I hope it's for keeps!

Reporter: Minnie Gupta
Author : Minnie Gupta
User Rating Rating(18 Votes)
vijay, anjumthanveer, lalita yadav, ~*puja*~, toli, nitu07, trups, princezna, Malajiji, ANJANA, gk_09, anku2cute, umi82990, -.Priya.-, nidhi2013, yipee, minuu

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Posted on: 14 May 2009 at 11:10am
kamya you are the best!I write you of want to help to learn hindi language contact me and for you read!I wait to talk whit all of you!

1 member(s) Liked the above comment :

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Posted on: 15 November 2007 at 3:36am
wow.. never knew there was so much to her. This interview was very heart-to-heart I must say... but hey, I'm glad that Sindoora's giving her encouragement. She does a great job at playing her :) Hope for the bessst for Kamya Punjabi...
and she was fantastic in Astitva.. one of those legendary soaps

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 10:33pm
awww... that was soo sweet kamya is just fantastic. I was surprised that someone would share sooo.. much about their inner life if it was someone else they simply would of dodge the question. I loved how kamya expressed soo much.I wish her all the luck on finding, Mr. perfect.!!

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 7:04pm
wow tha so sad..seems liek shes been thru alot at least she wasn't selfish and left him for his daughter tha was nice of her..and its tru u never wen/where/who/how or y u fall in love..its jus hapens

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 5:08pm
Poor soul...its bad to try to break someones home for your own happiness but then again its not anyone fault since no one can control their feelings and emotions..the man did good and went back to his wife but i feel sorry for her.

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 1:46pm
awww..... im sorry to hear that....i wish u luck.......
kiya kahoon kis se kahooon.... duniyah mai mujhe ishq raas na aaya.....

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 7:34am
Kamya is fantastic.I hope she finds the love of her life after all she must have been through:)

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 6:47am
wow good info!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 12:16am
Good Luck Kamya.Thanks for a great interview.... I've always like her as an actress.. She did a wonderful job on Astitva..
But she is the best in Dulan..

I do hope you find true love soon kamya! you deserve to be happy.

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Posted on: 14 November 2007 at 12:06am
Awesome interview... I love her frankness. Life happens... All the best to her in her life. She is a very talented actress!


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