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RN fic...confusion...(ud pg26)

rogerfan Senior Member
rogerfan
rogerfan

Joined: 03 July 2007
Posts: 305

Posted: 17 May 2008 at 8:04am | IP Logged

Hi friends…. I am back after a long time…. I am planning to start a new fic…. Total fun…. Confusion… (exam ka kuch jyada asar ho gaya hai)…  I just thought of writing some comedy… so I planned this…  just tell me whether u like it or not…..

 

………………………………………………….

 

Voice: Naina kya kar rahi hai…. jaldi chal… train ka time ho gaya hai…

 

Naina: coming ritu….. and a girl in red halter top and white Capri comes down running….

Naina: o wowwww…. Ritu u r looking hot…..

 

And we see a girl in black micro mini and grey top with her hair open( the dress whish karina wore in chaliya song).

 

Naina: bhaiya will be flat…. And she whistles….

 

Ritu blushes and says…. Oh shut up naina….. and u too r looking gr8… I know u r also waiting for raj bhaiya…..

 

Now its time for naina to blush…..

 

Naina: shut up my would be bhabhi… its just that I am waiting for him because I haven't seen him from past 10 years….

 

Ritu: ya ya I know I know… chalo now u r delaying…. We will be late….

 

And they left for the station…

 

…………………………………………………….

 

In the train two hot guys were chatting and were in one compartment……

 

Guy1: yaar raj I am really excited…. I can't believe I am getting engaged to ritu in just two days….

 

Raj: is it that hard to believe??? (Making face) I am listening this from past two years…..mimicking (raj when will I marry ur sis… I love her and all)… yaar tujhe to sharam bhi nahi aati…. Meri behen se pyar ka izhaar mere aage hi karta hai…..

 

Navin: (singing) jab pyar kiya to darna kya…. Pyar kiya koi chori nahi ki… chup chup aahein bharna kya…. Pyar kiya to darna kya….

 

Raj: shuttttt upppppp….

 

Navin: ok ok…. Accha ye bata tu meri behen se milne ke liye betaab nahi hai…… bata…

Raj: oh shut up navin… of course I am excited to meet her… but its just that ki I haven't seen her in past 10 years… i have just seen her pic…I ofcourse want to meet her… she was my best friend …. And she is and she will be….

 

Navin: oh ho… she was… she is.. and she will be…. Oye hoye ki gal hai….

 

Raj: come on navin… ab wahi to thi jo hamesha mera saath deti thi tere aur ritu ke against….

 

Navin: haan yaad hai… par tub hi mat bhul ki usne hum dono ki kitni baar band bajayi hai…. kitne pranks khele hai hamare saath….

 

Raj: yaad hai navin…. God… kitni dramebaaj thi….har baar natak … drama… god….kya wo ab bhi aisi hi hai???

 

Navin: yaar general mush***** sudhar sakta hai par naina no ways…. Mujhe to darr lag raha hai… ki pata nahi is baar kya karegi wo mere saath…. U know jab mai last time aaya tha na to usne mera kitna band bajaya tha… tu to tha nahi warna tujhe bhi nahi chodti…

 

Raj: array koi baat nahi …. Mai dekhta hun kya karegi wo iss baar…

 

Navin: raj kash kuch aisa ho ki is baar wo ulloo bane…. Koi idea de… is baar mai saare saalo ki kasar nikalna chahta hun…. Kaash mai uske saath koi prank khel paun….

 

Raj: oye teri behen hai wo…. Par yaar to tell you the truth is baar mai bhi sochta hun ki koi prank hum dono bhi khelein…. Par kya….

 

Navin: pata nahi… sochte hai… waise bhi hr. mei delhi aane waala hai…. ye aalekh, abhimanyu aur huda kya kar rahe hai… jab se hum jammu se ravana hue hai mile hi nahi…. Aur jabki wo saath waale compartment mei hai….

 

Raj: yahi to mai bhi soch raha hun… alekh aur huda ek compartment mei fir bhi koi aawaaz nahi… koi train mei tod fod nahi…koi jhatka nahi… ye kaise ho sakta hai/…. Kya inhone major ki daant ko itna seriously le liya….

 

Navin: na can't be…. Huda aur aalekh lade na ho aisa nahi ho sakta… abhi delhi aane se pehle hi koi na koi hamare compartment mei aayega aur kahega…..

 

Just then a sound came…

 

Voice: mai usse aur nahi jhel sakta… mai yahan aa raha hun….

 

Navin and raj look towards the door and laughs… HUDAAA

 

Huda….: whatttt????? Mai us tapori khuni aalekh ko aur nahi jhel sakta….. mujhe yahan aana hai….

 

………………………………………………………………………….

 

On new delhi railway station…..

 

Ritu: naina have u checked it??? Bhai aur navin……..

 

Naina: come on ritu u r asking this sixth time…. Maine acche se check kiya hai…. raj aur bhai hai compartment no. 21 mei aur unke dost aalekh bhaiya, abhimanyu aur koi capt. Huda hai compartment no. 22 mei….

 

Ritu: yaar ye tum aalekh koi bhai kyun bulati ho….

 

Naina: kyuki last yr. jab aalekh bhaiya aur capt. Abhimanyu diwali pe ghar aaye the na bhai ke saath to aalekh bhaiya helped me a lot….

 

Ritu: come on naina…. Wo khuni sharabi …..

 

Naina: oye ritu… don't u dare say anything against my aalekh bhaiya….

 

Ritu: ok ok thik hai.. I won't… but who is captain huda….

 

Naina: bhaiya ke batch mate hai… last yr. wo bhi aane waale the… par fir kisi mission ki wajah se unhe aur raj ko jaana pada aur wo nahi aa paaye…

 

Ritu: haan yaad hai … raj bhaiya bhi tab nahi aa paaye the…

Naina: agar ab bhi tumhari aur bhai ki engagement na hoti to pata nahi mei raj se kab milti….

 

Ritu: haan haan I know… pata hai is baar in sab ko inke hard work aur dedication ki wajah se 1 month ka off mila hai…. iska matlab…

 

Naina: iska matlab raj aur bhai tumhari shaadi tak yahi rehne waale hai….. gr888 we will have fun…

 

Ritu: to kya iss baar bhi tum koi prank khelne ki soch rahi ho…

 

Naina: socha tha… par nahi iss baar nahi… iss baar sirf un dono se milne ka itna mann hai… aur fir purani saari baatein bhi batani hai.. ki iss baar nahi…. Iss baar let them rest… kitna ladte hai border pe….

 

Ritu: haan ye to hai…. chal train aane mei bas 20 min. hai…

 

(but what naina doesn't know was that this time she won't rest… this time raj and navin won't let her rest..)

 

……………………………………………………………………….

 

In train….

 

Huda: raj .. navin mai is khuni ko aur nahi jhel sakta…

 

from back

 

voice: ae khuni kisko bola be… khud kyat u bada sharif hai…jab dekho kabhi idhar to kabhi udhar muuh marta firta hai… ladki dekhi nahi ki ho gaya chalu…

 

huda: tu to chup kar… huda kabhi ladkiyon pe line nahi marta… ladkiyan huda ka charm sambhal nahi paati aur daudi aati hai….

 

aalekh: huh… tera charm … abbey tere paas se bhaiso ke tabele jaisi baas aati hai…. isliye ladkiyan daud ke durr jati hai…

 

huda: teri to.. ye bol na kit u mujh se jalta hai… kyuki ladkiyan tere paas nahi aati……

 

raj: shut up both of you….kya hua koi batayega bhi……

 

navin: hona kya hai fir wahi aalekh huda mahabharat…..

 

huda: mai is aalekh ke saath aur nahi reh sakta ek compartment mei…

 

aalekh: to apun bhi kaun sa tere saath rehne ke waste mara ja raha hai… apun ko bhi nahi rehna tere saath… aisa kaam kaar iss train se kud ja… apun bhi khush aur tub hi…

 

navin: shup up…. Huda aisa karo tum mere saath yahan raho… waise bhi delhi aane waala hai…. raj wahan chala jaayega aalekh ke saath… bas 15 min ki baat hai…. raj do you u have any problem???

 

Raj: in dono ki ladayi sun kar apna sar pakane se accha hai mai wahan chala jaun…. Chal aalekh…

 

……………………………………………………………………………………

 

On station….

 

Ritu: what have u decided????

 

Naina: what?????

 

Ritu: how r you going to welcome ur raj and bhaiya???

 

Naina: shut up ritu…. Waise I am also thinking on the same terms… in don one hame apne aane ka time agar kal raat na bataya hota aur pehle bataya hota to shayad kuch karti mai… par ab kya karun….

 

Ritu: to kya karna hai???

 

Naina:emmmm…………………… IDEA……………

 

Ritu: kya???

 

Naina: dekh hame bhai aur raj ka compartment no. to pehle se pata hai… to what I will do is before them I will go in the train and jump in their compartment.. and will surprise them… they can never think of something like this would happen…..

(they can surely not think that's why confusion is gonna happen…. And my fic is here…)

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………

 

After 15 min…

 

In train….

 

Navin: dekh delhi aa gaya… hamare paas samaan to kuch khaas nahi hai… chal tu ye raj ka bag utha le mai ye mera bag uthata hun……..naina aur ritu hamara wait kar  rahi hongi…

 

Huda: kya ab ye kaam ye jatt karega… chal koi gal nahi waise bhi raj ne mujhe usse khuni se bachaya hai… aur fir wo bhi to mera bag laata hoga…

 

Navin: haan wo tera bag leke hamare compartment mei hi aayega… fir hum sab saath mei utrenge…. Waise bhi delhi is last stop… to train is not going anywhere….

 

Suddenly the door of the compartment burst open and a sound came……

 

Voice: BHAII…….. RAJJJJJJJJJJJ and she jumps on huda and hugs him………..

And says RAJ I MISSED U A LOT……..

 

………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

Character sketch……..

 

 Rajveer singh shekhawat…. captain Indian army……

 

Navin singh ahluwalia ……. Captain Indian army..

 

Naina singh ahluwalia…… (profession I haven't decided… I have two options.. tell me should I make her a RJ from radio mirchi or a reporter from NDTV)

 

Ritu singh shekhawat…… fashion designer

 

Captain amardeep huda, captain aalekh sharma, captain abhimanyu rai chauhan….

 

And shekhawat's and ahluwalia's are best friends and business partners…. And are very famous in business world………

 

Other characters will be introduced later on as they come…..

 

……………………………………………………………………………………

 

Hmmmmmmmmmm….. toh I end it here…. Just tell me should I continue or not….

Just to tell you this fic is mostly comedy……. And any emotional scenes will be in middle and in the end… besides those I just planned to write something light…..

 

Ok… waiting for comments…………

(next part will be after 10 comments….see I am becoming greedy…… so as soon as I get those comments I will post the next part….till them i am going to check other fics... i have missed a lot so i am going to catch up with them.... and yes i won't be able to update my other fic today... but surely i will update it tom..)

 

Ok b bye…

Take care…

And keep smiling….

Sheenu……..

 

 



Edited by rogerfan - 08 July 2008 at 12:18pm

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

simron...

sweta2005 IF-Sizzlerz
sweta2005
sweta2005

Joined: 13 November 2005
Posts: 18399

Posted: 17 May 2008 at 9:02am | IP Logged
awesome too good very nice waiting for next asap i think naina will think huda as raj it would be fun.
dazzling_glory IF-Rockerz
dazzling_glory
dazzling_glory

Joined: 15 October 2005
Posts: 6149

Posted: 17 May 2008 at 11:01am | IP Logged
it sounds very interesting and happening....so please continue Wink
RSZR Senior Member
RSZR
RSZR

Joined: 02 May 2008
Posts: 468

Posted: 17 May 2008 at 11:14am | IP Logged
IT WAS REALLY GOOD SO PLS UPDATE SOON Clap ... I AM EAGERLY WAITING.... Big smile
quietrajpri1623 Goldie
quietrajpri1623
quietrajpri1623

Joined: 19 January 2008
Posts: 1107

Posted: 17 May 2008 at 1:09pm | IP Logged
wooooow...ekdum mast yaar...title is awesum...and yes make Naina, a RJ...as she is very cheerful...thanks dear for starting this exciting RN ff...u r superb but please update soon...
litika Groupbie
litika
litika

Joined: 11 December 2007
Posts: 118

Posted: 17 May 2008 at 10:16pm | IP Logged
veryyy cool...update soon Tongue
-Yaz- IF-Rockerz
-Yaz-
-Yaz-

Joined: 06 May 2007
Posts: 5049

Posted: 18 May 2008 at 8:11am | IP Logged
woooooohoooo!! your back where did you disappear of too anyways a new fic i love the title confusion it's so cool and the first part was awsome!!! as well loved the alekh and huda part, mahabaaaaaaaaarat mahabaraaaaaaaat LOL so naina thinks that huda is raj, hiw wrong could dhe get huda jaise flirt ko koi raj kaise samaj sakta hain and now i have a feeling that everyone is going to play along to this and for the whole holiday naina is going to think that huda is raj and raj is huda LOL that would be fun to watch......

anyhoooooo glad your back i was missing you other fic..... and once again amazing update sheenu Clap Clap

take care Big smile
yasmin
Shaina_b IF-Stunnerz
Shaina_b
Shaina_b

Joined: 13 July 2007
Posts: 42435

Posted: 18 May 2008 at 7:21pm | IP Logged
Make Naina NDTV reporter!!Isse we can keep her connected to Raj and Navin as in remember Lakshya!!!

But yaar anyways reporter!!!Naina as RJ we have had before!!!

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