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Please welcome our next IOTW (Page 17)

pyaridilwalino1 IF-Dazzler
pyaridilwalino1
pyaridilwalino1

Joined: 03 August 2005
Posts: 3856

Posted: 10 May 2008 at 1:58pm | IP Logged
You can call me whatever you like Muskaan! I'm glad you enjoyed my responses! I thoroughly enjoyed answering your questions. THEY WERE FUN!!!!!!!!!!! Smile Big smile
   

Mosammad IF-Sizzlerz
Mosammad
Mosammad

Joined: 02 June 2007
Posts: 10279

Posted: 10 May 2008 at 5:44pm | IP Logged
Hai Shweta...ur the fastest one yet! Okies...not much to say about the old ones...Im gonna give you dumber questions this time around:

A stitch in time saves nine what?
After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
Are female moths called myths?
Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors?
Are there a lot of virgins in the Virgin Islands?LOL LOL
Are there any unguided missiles?
Are you breaking the law if you drive past those road signs that say "Do Not Pass"?
Are you telling the truth if you lie in bed?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?LOL LOL
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?LOL LOL
Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawnshop?
Can you get cavities in your dentures if you use too much artificial sweetener?
Could crop-circles be the work of a cereal killer?
Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?
Day light savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it?
Did Noah keep his bees in archives?
Do blind dogs have seeing-eye humans?
Do blind Eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs?
Do boxer shorts box?
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
Do clowns wear really big socks?
Do crematoriums give discounts to burn victims?
Do files get embarrassed when they get unzipped?
Do fish get thirsty?
Do hummingbirds hum because they don't know the words?
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Do jellyfish get gas from eating jellybeans?
Do mass murderers kill only in church?
Do people in Australia call the rest of the world 'up over'?
Do pilots take crash-courses?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
Do Scottish Terriers get Scotch Tape worms?
Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers?
Do steam rollers really roll steam?
Do television evangelists do more than lay people?
Do vampires get AIDS?
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Do witches run spell checkers?
Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?
Does a man-eating shark eat women, too?
Does an analyst have to be anal?
Does killing time damage eternity?
Does that screwdriver belong to Phillip?
Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?
Ever notice how irons have a setting for "permanent" press? I don't get it.
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?
Have you ever talked into an acoustic modem?
Have you ever wondered?
How can someone "draw a blank"?
How can there be self-help "groups"?
How can you tell when it is time to tune your bagpipes?
How come chocolate milk doesn't come from brown cows?
How come I can pick my ears but not my nose?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
How dead is the Dead Sea?
How did a fool and his money get together?
How did the man who invented cottage cheese know he was done?
How do I set my laser printer on stun?
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
How do they get the "Keep off the Grass" sign on the grass?
How do you get off a nonstop flight?
How do you know if honesty is the best policy unless you've tried some of the others?
How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink?
How do you throw away a garbage can?
How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
How does a person with a lisp pronounce that word?
How does a thermos know whether a drink should be hot or cold?
How does it work out that these people always die in alphabetical order?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
How is it possible to have a "civil" war?
Are you tired?
How is it possible to run out of space?
How long is the long arm of the law?
How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb?
How many weeks are there in a light year?
How much can I get away with and still go to heaven?
How much milk is there in the Milky Way?
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you was?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If a candle factory burns down, does everyone just stand around and sing "Happy Birthday?"
If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?
If a food processor slices and dices food, what does a word processor do?
If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman?
If a mime commits suicide, does he use a silencer?
If a mirror reverses right and left, why doesn't it reverse up and down?
If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a picture of a thousand words worth?
If a pig is sold to the pawn shop, is it a ham-hock?
If a pizza place sells pizza by the slice, is there a guy in the back tossing a triangle in the air?
If a pronoun is a word used in place of a noun, is a proverb a word used in place of a verb?
If a tree falls in the forest, does the earth scream out in pain?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?
If all the world is a stage, where are the audience sitting?
If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green, and a lemon called a yellow?
If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?
If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?
If bees live in an apiary, do apes live in a beeiary?
If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?
Are you tired now?
If cats and dog didn't have fur would we still pet them?
If corn can't hear, why does it have an ear?
If corn oil is made from corn, what is baby oil made from?
If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?
If everything is part of a whole, what is the whole part of?
If flowers don't talk back to you, are they mums?
If Fred Flintstone knew that the large order of ribs would tip his car over, why did he order them at the end of every show?
If God can do anything, can he make a rock so big he can't lift it? --George Carlin
If God dropped acid, would he see people?
If humans get a charley horse, what do horses get?
If humans have nightmares, what do horses have?
If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?
If I save time, when do I get it back?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
If man evolved from apes why do we still have apes?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
If our knees were on the backs of our legs, what would chairs look like?
If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made out of?
If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?
If Superman is so smart why does he wear his underpants over his trousers?
If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look like the way they do?
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
If the product says "Do not use if seal is broken", how are you supposed to open it and use it?
If time heals all wounds, how come bellybuttons don't fill in?
If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of?
If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
If you can wave a fan, and you can wave a club, can you wave a fan club?
If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
Are you tired now?
If you didn't get caught, did you really do it?
If you get into a taxi cab, and ask the driver to drive backwards to your destination, will the cab driver owe you money?
If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?
If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
If you're born again, do you have two bellybuttons?
If your car says Dodge on the front of it, do you really need a horn?
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
In court, why do they ask if you swear to tell the truth? If you're planning on lying, do they really think you'll tell them so?
Instead of wasting time hunting and cooking, why don't hunters just use flame-throwers?
Is "tired old clich" one?
Are you tired now?
Is a castrated pig disgruntled?
Is a halfback more valuable than a quarterback?
Is a sleeping bull a bull-dozer?
Is a small pig called a hamlet?
Is an oxymoron a really dumb bovine?
Is drilling for oil boring?
Is duck tape made out of ducks?
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Is that a flying saucer or a pie in the sky?
Is the nose the center of the face?
Is this bullshit or fertilizer?
Now that Microsoft is so big, should it be called Macrosoft?  
Are you tired?LOL LOL


pyaridilwalino1 IF-Dazzler
pyaridilwalino1
pyaridilwalino1

Joined: 03 August 2005
Posts: 3856

Posted: 10 May 2008 at 7:36pm | IP Logged

Originally posted by Mosammad

Hai Shweta...ur the fastest one yet! Okies...not much to say about the old ones...Im gonna give you dumber questions this time around:LOLdumber questions eh? Wink

A stitch in time saves nine what? I'm blank.....Ermm
After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water? no
Are female moths called myths? nope...
Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors? LOL
Are there a lot of virgins in the Virgin Islands?LOL LOL do you really want me to answer that one?LOL
Are there any unguided missiles? no meri jaan! LOL
Are you breaking the law if you drive past those road signs that say "Do Not Pass"? yes!!!! LOL
Are you telling the truth if you lie in bed? no, because you aren't laying in bed, but lying in bed! there is a difference. Embarrassed
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to? chalk boards
Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?LOL LOL yes
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?LOL LOL yes LOL
Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawnshop? LOL
Can you get cavities in your dentures if you use too much artificial sweetener?yes!
Could crop-circles be the work of a cereal killer? no
Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime? noLOL
Day light savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it? in my pocket
Did Noah keep his bees in archives? meinu ki pata! LOL
Do blind dogs have seeing-eye humans? nope
Do blind Eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs? ummmm
Do boxer shorts box? nahin ji!
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift? they have no choice
Do clowns wear really big socks? no, just big shoes
Do crematoriums give discounts to burn victims? no
Do files get embarrassed when they get unzipped? yes you didn't no? Files ki bhi izzat hoti hai! Wink
Do fish get thirsty? yes.
Do hummingbirds hum because they don't know the words?no humming is better than singing with lyrics.  
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites? yes
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? no infancy is much more fun!
Do jellyfish get gas from eating jellybeans? no adults do.
Do mass murderers kill only in church? aww no
Do people in Australia call the rest of the world 'up over'? yes.LOL
Do pilots take crash-courses? I hope not!
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"? yesLOL
Do Scottish Terriers get Scotch Tape worms? nope
Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers? no
Do steam rollers really roll steam? no
Do television evangelists do more than lay people? yes..much more
Do vampires get AIDS? yeah! LOL
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers? yes
Do witches run spell checkers? 'yes...

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? of course!LOL
Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?yes one big one!
Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter? no
Does a man-eating shark eat women, too? yes!!!
Does an analyst have to be anal? of course not!
Does killing time damage eternity?  yes
Does that screwdriver belong to Phillip? no
Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra? LOL
Ever notice how irons have a setting for "permanent" press? I don't get it.
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? no
Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool? never
Have you ever talked into an acoustic modem? never
Have you ever wondered? yes of course all the time
How can someone "draw a blank"? you can't think of anything
How can there be self-help "groups"? haha Natty asked me this one!
How can you tell when it is time to tune your bagpipes? when they sound weird...
How come chocolate milk doesn't come from brown cows?  because milk is only white
How come I can pick my ears but not my nose? you can pick your nose if you want.
How come wrong numbers are never busy? yes they are sometimes!
How dead is the Dead Sea? very dead! Dead
How did a fool and his money get together? I'm not a fool I wouldn't know!
How did the man who invented cottage cheese know he was done?only he would know!  
How do I set my laser printer on stun? I don't know
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign? they cross anywhere.
How do they get the "Keep off the Grass" sign on the grass? they put a sign on the grass.
How do you get off a nonstop flight? when you reach the destination.
How do you know if honesty is the best policy unless you've tried some of the others?you don't...you have to try other policies.
How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink? when you can't see it.
How do you throw away a garbage can? you throw it in another garbage can
How do you write zero in Roman numerals? ()
How does a person with a lisp pronounce that word? lip
How does a thermos know whether a drink should be hot or cold? it only keeps things the same temperature they are poured in.
How does it work out that these people always die in alphabetical order? do they really? what people? I would like to know.
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? in a car.
How is it possible to have a "civil" war? with people
Are you tired? pakk gayi! LOL
How is it possible to run out of space? when there is no space.
How long is the long arm of the law? kanoon ka haath bahutttt lamba hota hai! LOL
How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb? 1
How many weeks are there in a light year? no se
How much can I get away with and still go to heaven? nothing
How much milk is there in the Milky Way? sorry no milk!
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? as much as wood a woodchuck could chuck.
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you was? as old as you think
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? for safety
If a candle factory burns down, does everyone just stand around and sing "Happy Birthday?" no ofcourse not.
If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk? no
If a food processor slices and dices food, what does a word processor do? slice and dice words
If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman? yes
If a mime commits suicide, does he use a silencer? nope
If a mirror reverses right and left, why doesn't it reverse up and down? it could
If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a picture of a thousand words worth? nothing
If a pig is sold to the pawn shop, is it a ham-hock? no
If a pizza place sells pizza by the slice, is there a guy in the back tossing a triangle in the air? no LOL
If a pronoun is a word used in place of a noun, is a proverb a word used in place of a verb? no
If a tree falls in the forest, does the earth scream out in pain? no, but I'm sure it would want to! Embarrassed
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? it's homeless and naked.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? humans! LOL
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?we wouldn't ever know. 
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure? no
If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go? in my pocket!Wink
If all the world is a stage, where are the audience sitting? up in the sky
If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green, and a lemon called a yellow? because the english aren't that smart.
If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe? no they get astrofoot
If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends? no popularity without friends! Embarrassed
If bees live in an apiary, do apes live in a beeiary? yes
If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs? they should.
Are you tired now? not tired..but laughing! LOL
If cats and dog didn't have fur would we still pet them? prolly not
If corn can't hear, why does it have an ear? don't know
If corn oil is made from corn, what is baby oil made from? from babies! LOL
If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?they fight for freedom
If everything is part of a whole, what is the whole part of? part of everything
If flowers don't talk back to you, are they mums? no they are just smart
If Fred Flintstone knew that the large order of ribs would tip his car over, why did he order them at the end of every show? hmm don't know!
If God can do anything, can he make a rock so big he can't lift it? --George Carlin no
If God dropped acid, would he see people? yes
If humans get a charley horse, what do horses get? a charley
If humans have nightmares, what do horses have? nighthumans
If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?nope
If I save time, when do I get it back? never
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? because people are weird
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? because it's all about lust
If man evolved from apes why do we still have apes? because some don't survive natural selection.
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? yes
If our knees were on the backs of our legs, what would chairs look like? their wouldn't be any chairs
If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made out of? from girls.LOL
If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit? the rabbit was killed
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? yes
If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags? people
If Superman is so smart why does he wear his underpants over his trousers? smart people sometimes have bad fashion sense
If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look like the way they do? because they eat so much
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? second is the best
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off? no they turn them on.
If the product says "Do not use if seal is broken", how are you supposed to open it and use it? you shouldn't
If time heals all wounds, how come bellybuttons don't fill in? it heals all other wounds.
If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of? fogs.
If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi? nope
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it? because you don't do anything for free in this world.
If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? no cuz you ate
If you can wave a fan, and you can wave a club, can you wave a fan club? nope
If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots? for the sober drivers 
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?  what's a smurf?
Are you tired now? nope
If you didn't get caught, did you really do it? unfortunately yes
If you get into a taxi cab, and ask the driver to drive backwards to your destination, will the cab driver owe you money? no you would still have to give him money.
If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?yes
If you jog backwards, will you gain weight? no you would lost weight.
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back? I wouldLOL
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?  haha yes
If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke? yes a lame joke.
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter? no
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? the cat would be toasted.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? you have failed
If you're born again, do you have two bellybuttons? nope just one
If your car says Dodge on the front of it, do you really need a horn? Yes
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? you can't see
In court, why do they ask if you swear to tell the truth? If you're planning on lying, do they really think you'll tell them so? no
Instead of wasting time hunting and cooking, why don't hunters just use flame-throwers? I don't know I don't hunt
Is "tired old clich" one? huh?
Are you tired now? no...but my IQ level is droppingLOL
Is a castrated pig disgruntled? no
Is a halfback more valuable than a quarterback? no
Is a sleeping bull a bull-dozer? no
Is a small pig called a hamlet? no
Is an oxymoron a really dumb bovine? yes
Is drilling for oil boring? ya
Is duck tape made out of ducks? no
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon? yes
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny? yes
Is that a flying saucer or a pie in the sky? an aircraft
Is the nose the center of the face? part of the center
Is this bullshit or fertilizer? bullLOL
Now that Microsoft is so big, should it be called Macrosoft?   yes it should
Are you tired?LOL LOLno LOL


   you are toooo funny! where do you get these funny questions from? I'm not tired, but my IQ level surely has dropped! LOL Thanks Tammy! Hug

pyaridilwalino1 IF-Dazzler
pyaridilwalino1
pyaridilwalino1

Joined: 03 August 2005
Posts: 3856

Posted: 10 May 2008 at 9:25pm | IP Logged

Embarrassed

   Before my week ends I would just like to say thanks once again to all the people on this forum, who have been sooooo sweet to me. I really appreciate it--dil se! I've made many more friends this week and I can't wait to get to know more about my new friends. I cherish all of my friends I have made and I'm grateful that you guys took the time to congratulate me and/or ask me questions. You all just tooooo lovely! Thank you once again to the people, who opened this topic to find out, who was IOTW and to all those, who took the time to congratulate me and ask me questions. This week has been a joy ride and I have thoroughly enjoyed being IOTW. Good luck to the next one and Congrats in advance.

   Special thank you to all my friends on this forum, without you all me being IOTW wouldn't have been possible! Hug



Edited by pyaridilwalino1 - 10 May 2008 at 9:41pm

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