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chatbuster

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chatbuster

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Posted: 02 April 2008 at 10:14pm | IP Logged

i think arranged marriages are better. u get to see the entire menu first and can order to your heart's content. fine, the stuff might not taste as good later as advertised but there's something to be said for wider menu options, no? Tongue

on the other hand, trying to get into love relationships on the wild hope they lead to marriage is like sampling. after a few nibbles, one's already filled up, wasted a lot of time and ready to puke the last morsel. all of it without having seen what might have been on the menu Wink LOL

btw, i am all for forced marriages too. i mean one could be forced into marrying someone if she's breathtakingly gorgeous and all. and ready to do all it takes to make her guy happy. also, at least one could get the folks to pony up all the maintenance money because it was their idea. now how bad can that be? LOL

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Posted: 02 April 2008 at 10:27pm | IP Logged

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Edited by raj5000 - 03 April 2008 at 8:26am

nitasuni

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Posted: 03 April 2008 at 7:09am | IP Logged

Originally posted by chatbuster


i think arranged marriages are better. u get to see the entire menu first and can order to your heart's content. fine, the stuff might not taste as good later as advertised but there's something to be said for wider menu options, no? Tongue

There are some mandatory items in the menu which is not tasty as seen and some hidden side dishes are also there which can not be avoided.  What about that? anyway not against arranged marriages but not so supportive

on the other hand, trying to get into love relationships on the wild hope they lead to marriage is like sampling. after a few nibbles, one's already filled up, wasted a lot of time and ready to puke the last morsel. all of it without having seen what might have been on the menu Wink LOL

If there is true love, mutual understanding and educational and financial support (well placed) love marriage (also arranged marriage) can survive.

btw, i am all for forced marriages too. i mean one could be forced into marrying someone if she's breathtakingly gorgeous and all. and ready to do all it takes to make her guy happy. also, at least one could get the folks to pony up all the maintenance money because it was their idea. now how bad can that be? LOL

At any rate forced marriages are not good. Earlier in Indian condition it was feasible.  Moderately gorgeous girl and handsome guy is advisable for a longer, uneventful married life. It is seen that  if one of them are extraordinarily (beautiful) then there is problem / suspicion from the other.

corvette

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Posted: 03 April 2008 at 8:06am | IP Logged
Originally posted by nitasuni

[QUOTE=chatbuster]
i think arranged marriages are better. u get to see the entire menu first and can order to your heart's content. fine, the stuff might not taste as good later as advertised but there's something to be said for wider menu options, no? Tongue

There are some mandatory items in the menu which is not tasty as seen and some hidden side dishes are also there which can not be avoided.  What about that?

Erm.....I'm not eating at any restaurant with a menu like THAT!!!LOL

 anyway not against arranged marriages but not so supportive

on the other hand, trying to get into love relationships on the wild hope they lead to marriage is like sampling. after a few nibbles, one's already filled up, wasted a lot of time and ready to puke the last morsel. all of it without having seen what might have been on the menu Wink LOL

If there is true love, mutual understanding and educational and financial support (well placed) love marriage (also arranged marriage) can survive.
At any rate forced marriages are not good. Earlier in Indian condition it was feasible.  Moderately gorgeous girl and handsome guy is advisable for a longer, uneventful married life. It is seen that  if one of them are extraordinarily (beautiful) then there is problem / suspicion from the other.

I think you have been watching too much Ardhangini - no wonder it was pulled off screen!

There is a contradiction in your statement - you cant say "love, mutual understanding..." blah blah marriage can survive, but if youre too good looking or rather one is better looking than the other it causes suspicion - I call that that lack of love, understanding and serious insecurity.

If it is Asian culture that is being referred to- then that particular culture still likes to arrange marriages - that is by no means a guarantee of its success over a love marriage. Its just another way of being the control freaks that they love to be.

The real test is whether your relationship is strong to weather all sorts of strains that are invariably put on it.

Plain fact is, tow the party line and everyone is with you.

Go it alone and society will be ready to smile smugly and say "We told you so"

Dont need to be a genius to work out which relationship is likely to experience the most strain - unfortunately - as far as I am concerned.

AngryMAngry

lighthouse

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Posted: 03 April 2008 at 8:06am | IP Logged

Originally posted by Tarana

IS ARRANGED MARRIAGE ENSURE HAPPY, PRODUCTIVE FAMILIES?

 Yes.. especially when money and beauty IS (are) arranged in a marriage to produce happy union. Tongue  never seen a rich guy who isn't happy as can be with a beauty..Wink 

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Posted: 03 April 2008 at 8:21am | IP Logged
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lighthouse

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Posted: 03 April 2008 at 8:35am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Gauri_3

Originally posted by lighthouse

Originally posted by Tarana

IS ARRANGED MARRIAGE ENSURE HAPPY, PRODUCTIVE FAMILIES?

 Yes.. especially when money and beauty IS (are) arranged in a marriage to produce happy union. Tongue  never seen a rich guy who isn't happy as can be with a beauty..Wink 

never say never, lightyLOL  for some, the hapiness is just short term.  otherwise, why would we see so many rich guys getting divorced from their picture perfect wives or vice versa!!!  because they move on to another beauty.. Tongue as you said happiness is short term..LOL .. see a rich guy can afford to do that..

the fact remains that if one is going for an arrang ed marriage, then why not get the best out there out of all the options one had.  ab aagey kya hoga kis ney dekha per yeh risk toh love marriages mein bhi rehta hai na.

...and i really do not subscribe to the theory that girl shd be average and guy handsome.  aisa hota toh meri shadi toh kabhi hoti hee naheenWinkLOLLOL   ROFL ROFL  G. didn't know you both are average looking... LOL j/k yaar no offence pls...

actually suspicion or cheating r equal opportunity vices.  all r prone to them.  can't be pinning it on just the good looking ones or butt ugly ones. 

as far as arranged marriages r concerned, well, success is not guaranteed but u do venture in to it with most of ur bases covered and a punching bag out there who can be blamed if things go wrongLOL but keep in mind that at the end of the day, it will be ur life that'll get screwed up if things did not work out.  only comfort u get is that u can cuss to ur heart's content and blame those who arranged it...if it helps in any wayLOL

 With you on arranged marriages.. thank god , no thank my parents and his parents ..LOL Wink  I was miserable when I found out meri sagaai ho gayi and I didn't even have a say in it...Confused... in hind sight could say compared to my choice (typical teenager choice), theirs was better for me. Tongue

 



Edited by lighthouse - 03 April 2008 at 8:37am

nitasuni

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nitasuni

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Posts: 850

Posted: 03 April 2008 at 9:04am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Madmadgirl

Originally posted by nitasuni

[QUOTE=chatbuster]
i think arranged marriages are better. u get to see the entire menu first and can order to your heart's content. fine, the stuff might not taste as good later as advertised but there's something to be said for wider menu options, no? Tongue

There are some mandatory items in the menu which is not tasty as seen and some hidden side dishes are also there which can not be avoided.  What about that?

Erm.....I'm not eating at any restaurant with a menu like THAT!!!LOL

I am not telling anyone particularly, but it is part and parcel of this pakage, if you get a better package, you are lucky.  In my case the package is not so bad eventhough there is some unavoidable side dishes are there, but not so nasty. 

 anyway not against arranged marriages but not so supportive

on the other hand, trying to get into love relationships on the wild hope they lead to marriage is like sampling. after a few nibbles, one's already filled up, wasted a lot of time and ready to puke the last morsel. all of it without having seen what might have been on the menu Wink LOL

If there is true love, mutual understanding and educational and financial support (well placed) love marriage (also arranged marriage) can survive.
At any rate forced marriages are not good. Earlier in Indian condition it was feasible.  Moderately gorgeous girl and handsome guy is advisable for a longer, uneventful married life. It is seen that  if one of them are extraordinarily (beautiful) then there is problem / suspicion from the other.

I think you have been watching too much Ardhangini - no wonder it was pulled off screen!

Very sorry I am not a searial buff and never ever seen the said serial.

There is a contradiction in your statement - you cant say "love, mutual understanding..." blah blah marriage can survive, but if youre too good looking or rather one is better looking than the other it causes suspicion - I call that that lack of love, understanding and serious insecurity.

I am not making blah blah, it is my experience so far.

 The other part, that too gorgeous girl and too handsome guys, that is also from  a survey conducted by a woman's  magazine  among guys and the result/ opinion made by most of the youngsters are that they love to watch fashonable extraordinarily beautiful girls but  not as wife material. There are some examples I directly know.  We had a higher official  who is extreemly handsome  and who's wife is so susupicious, and his precaments. The reverse is also I know. Ill treating the wife for her beauty and his suspicion.

 If it is Asian culture that is being referred to- then that particular culture still likes to arrange marriages - that is by no means a guarantee of its success over a love marriage. About guarentee(my opinion) please see my earlier posts.Its just another way of being the control freaks that they love to be.

The real test is whether your relationship is strong to weather all sorts of strains that are invariably put on it.

The same is I said in the above statement, but the words are love and mutual understanding etc., but to you it is blah blah, it is not my fault. 

Plain fact is, tow the party line and everyone is with you.

Go it alone and society will be ready to smile smugly and say "We told you so"

Dont need to be a genius to work out which relationship is likely to experience the most strain - unfortunately - as far as I am concerned.

Sorry, we can not predict which relationship will flurish or which will end, we are seeing a lot of good relationships suffering and so many average( arranged/met the husband  first time at the marriage hall=my parents, they managed well to the end(my father died some years ago)) with the hardwork and love from mutual side, flurishing.

AngryMAngry

I am not particularly against or supporting arranged marriage, as I earlier said in my first post, there is  no guarentee for both, other than the partners hard work to understand and love for each other.



Edited by nitasuni - 03 April 2008 at 9:15am

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