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Arranged marriage (Page 2)

nitasuni Senior Member
nitasuni
nitasuni

Joined: 08 August 2007
Posts: 850

Posted: 02 April 2008 at 9:49am | IP Logged
Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

My vote too.

The only guarentee is  in most arranged marriages  is that there is the support of the family if somthing happend after marriage.  Other than that there is no difference, we have to adjust, sometimes compromise in  in both kind of marriages. As in every relationship, for the  success of marriage also  love, loyality, adjustment, compromise  etc. are necessaary.

I don't agree with you there. I would say that family support is guaranteed because your family cares for you, irrespective of the kind of marriage you had. Even if you have gone against your family and got married, when the need arises your family will stand by you. Tongue 

@ bold,   I can not agree with you. I peresonally know somany cases where parants are not accepting the marriage or the son-in-law even after years, one of them is my elder relative.  Even at death bed the father didn't  speak to the daughter.

If the girl is married and go to another house, there are some parents who do not care about her, even after arranged marriage.  That is  one of the reason, that no body to care the girl, for  increasing dowery death and suicides.

SholaJoBhadkey IF-Dazzler
SholaJoBhadkey
SholaJoBhadkey

Joined: 23 August 2005
Posts: 2672

Posted: 02 April 2008 at 10:03am | IP Logged
Originally posted by nitasuni

Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

My vote too.

The only guarentee is  in most arranged marriages  is that there is the support of the family if somthing happend after marriage.  Other than that there is no difference, we have to adjust, sometimes compromise in  in both kind of marriages. As in every relationship, for the  success of marriage also  love, loyality, adjustment, compromise  etc. are necessaary.

I don't agree with you there. I would say that family support is guaranteed because your family cares for you, irrespective of the kind of marriage you had. Even if you have gone against your family and got married, when the need arises your family will stand by you. Tongue 

@ bold,   I can not agree with you. I peresonally know somany cases where parants are not accepting the marriage or the son-in-law even after years, one of them is my elder relative.  Even at death bed the father didn't  speak to the daughter. And I know many many cases where the reverse is true. I would say these are exceptions rather than rules!

If the girl is married and go to another house, there are some parents who do not care about her, even after arranged marriage.  That is  one of the reason, that no body to care the girl, for  increasing dowery death and suicides.

In both cases the family doesn't care, period. That was my point. You are guaranteed your family's support only when you have a caring family. The kind of marriage you have is a small factor!

nitasuni Senior Member
nitasuni
nitasuni

Joined: 08 August 2007
Posts: 850

Posted: 02 April 2008 at 10:43am | IP Logged
Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

My vote too.

The only guarentee is  in most arranged marriages  is that there is the support of the family if somthing happend after marriage.  Other than that there is no difference, we have to adjust, sometimes compromise in  in both kind of marriages. As in every relationship, for the  success of marriage also  love, loyality, adjustment, compromise  etc. are necessaary.

I don't agree with you there. I would say that family support is guaranteed because your family cares for you, irrespective of the kind of marriage you had. Even if you have gone against your family and got married, when the need arises your family will stand by you. Tongue 

@ bold,   I can not agree with you. I peresonally know somany cases where parants are not accepting the marriage or the son-in-law even after years, one of them is my elder relative.  Even at death bed the father didn't  speak to the daughter. And I know many many cases where the reverse is true. I would say these are exceptions rather than rules!

If the girl is married and go to another house, there are some parents who do not care about her, even after arranged marriage.  That is  one of the reason, that no body to care the girl, for  increasing dowery death and suicides.

In both cases the family doesn't care, period. That was my point. You are guaranteed your family's support only when you have a caring family. The kind of marriage you have is a small factor!

It is true, that is why in my  first post I stated that most cases.    You know, however they love their daughters, some parents are adamant if they  disobayed them.



Edited by nitasuni - 02 April 2008 at 10:44am
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qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
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Joined: 03 December 2006
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Posted: 02 April 2008 at 9:29pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by nitasuni

Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

My vote too.

The only guarentee is  in most arranged marriages  is that there is the support of the family if somthing happend after marriage.  Other than that there is no difference, we have to adjust, sometimes compromise in  in both kind of marriages. As in every relationship, for the  success of marriage also  love, loyality, adjustment, compromise  etc. are necessaary.

I don't agree with you there. I would say that family support is guaranteed because your family cares for you, irrespective of the kind of marriage you had. Even if you have gone against your family and got married, when the need arises your family will stand by you. Tongue 

@ bold,   I can not agree with you. I peresonally know somany cases where parants are not accepting the marriage or the son-in-law even after years, one of them is my elder relative.  Even at death bed the father didn't  speak to the daughter.

If the girl is married and go to another house, there are some parents who do not care about her, even after arranged marriage.  That is  one of the reason, that no body to care the girl, for  increasing dowery death and suicides.

I agree with you nits....i have seen those kinda things as well which u have seen.. sjb is just talking about some exception i think...

qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
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Posted: 02 April 2008 at 9:32pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

My vote too.

The only guarentee is  in most arranged marriages  is that there is the support of the family if somthing happend after marriage.  Other than that there is no difference, we have to adjust, sometimes compromise in  in both kind of marriages. As in every relationship, for the  success of marriage also  love, loyality, adjustment, compromise  etc. are necessaary.

I don't agree with you there. I would say that family support is guaranteed because your family cares for you, irrespective of the kind of marriage you had. Even if you have gone against your family and got married, when the need arises your family will stand by you. Tongue 

@ bold,   I can not agree with you. I peresonally know somany cases where parants are not accepting the marriage or the son-in-law even after years, one of them is my elder relative.  Even at death bed the father didn't  speak to the daughter. And I know many many cases where the reverse is true. I would say these are exceptions rather than rules! i think what u are saying is more of an exception than what nits is saying....

If the girl is married and go to another house, there are some parents who do not care about her, even after arranged marriage.  That is  one of the reason, that no body to care the girl, for  increasing dowery death and suicides. dont mix two things.. my experiences go exactly with nits...

In both cases the family doesn't care, period. That was my point. You are guaranteed your family's support only when you have a caring family. no arranged marriage has a btter chance cos the family still thinks you are one of them.. in other kinds of marriages it more of civility that they dont demonstrate their disapproval.... The kind of marriage you have is a small factor!

qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
qwertyesque
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Joined: 03 December 2006
Posts: 5953

Posted: 02 April 2008 at 9:33pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by nitasuni

Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

Originally posted by SholaJoBhadkey

Originally posted by nitasuni

My vote too.

The only guarentee is  in most arranged marriages  is that there is the support of the family if somthing happend after marriage.  Other than that there is no difference, we have to adjust, sometimes compromise in  in both kind of marriages. As in every relationship, for the  success of marriage also  love, loyality, adjustment, compromise  etc. are necessaary.

I don't agree with you there. I would say that family support is guaranteed because your family cares for you, irrespective of the kind of marriage you had. Even if you have gone against your family and got married, when the need arises your family will stand by you. Tongue 

@ bold,   I can not agree with you. I peresonally know somany cases where parants are not accepting the marriage or the son-in-law even after years, one of them is my elder relative.  Even at death bed the father didn't  speak to the daughter. And I know many many cases where the reverse is true. I would say these are exceptions rather than rules!

If the girl is married and go to another house, there are some parents who do not care about her, even after arranged marriage.  That is  one of the reason, that no body to care the girl, for  increasing dowery death and suicides.

In both cases the family doesn't care, period. That was my point. You are guaranteed your family's support only when you have a caring family. The kind of marriage you have is a small factor!

It is true, that is why in my  first post I stated that most cases.    You know, however they love their daughters, some parents are adamant if they  disobayed them.

now do i know you.. how come i agree with every post you are making here!!Smile

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