Bollywood remake of TITANIC

kanchi Goldie

Joined: 25 May 2004
Posts: 1645

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 3:07am | IP Logged

Have you ever wondered what would be in "Titanic" if the same was made in Bollywood? The name of the movie would be "Goa to Bombay". Well here it goes:

Aishwarya has to be Rose and who else but Shahrukh as Jack.

    Aishwarya's fianc would be Gulshan Grover who mutters "bad man" every time he sees Shahrukh. Amitabh Bachan would make a guest appearance as the Ship's captain and would be waltzing with Aishwarya during the party. Of course, he will not die. Shahrukh will be traveling with his sister and 5 other chamchas from college plus 50 extras who are well trained with every dance sequence in the world. The movie would only last for 7 hours. Thanks to great piece of editing, there would be only 22 songs in the movie out of 30 in CD album. The ship would be overflowing with extras that you normally find in movies that have a court scene full of people or a slum full of aam-janta. The ship will start sinking, not because of the iceberg but because of excessive on-board population. The back seat of the car scene would be replaced with a song in the Swiss Alps. Best friend of Shahrukh will save his sister during chaos. The sister will instantly fall in love right after this and she will get a song or two. How can we forget the painting scene? Shahrukh would be painting Aishwarya's portrait. This is to be followed by a dance number, with extras of course, in a art gallery. Shahrukh would eventually find his long lost mom Aasoo Devi on the ship. Only during the climax would Aasoo Devi tell Shahrukh about how 'Gulshan' troubled them. Shahrukh would then yell, "Kutte mein tera khoon pee jaaoonga". The ensuing fight would only last for an hour. There would be an antakshari for the "drowners" conducted by Anu Kapoor instead of the trio playing the violin.
  • Most important! The number of times the word "Bachaoooo" would be yelled would be a record in the history of cinema.

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:


anjuman Senior Member

Joined: 11 June 2004
Posts: 671

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 5:46am | IP Logged
it is going to be exactly like this if we have a remakeLOL
Morgoth IF-Rockerz

Joined: 01 June 2004
Posts: 6831

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 8:12am | IP Logged
LOL very true
current IF-Rockerz

Joined: 21 July 2004
Posts: 6170

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 10:10am | IP Logged
LOLLOLgood one kanchi
Ritu_t123 Groupbie

Joined: 12 June 2004
Posts: 79

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 1:31pm | IP Logged
deadly Senior Member

Joined: 24 May 2004
Posts: 533

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 1:59pm | IP Logged
LOL So true
kool_krazy Groupbie

Joined: 24 June 2004
Posts: 20

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 5:10pm | IP Logged

very interesting and funny haha It's the best bollywood version of the Titanic I have ever heard.You've actually made me laugh and cheered me haha By the way make sure your version is protected by copyright, you never know who could steal your idea from the Film haha

SANDY Goldie

Joined: 14 June 2004
Posts: 1596

Posted: 18 August 2004 at 5:54pm | IP Logged
very nice kanchi!

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