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Who bears the marraige expenses? (Page 2)

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raj5000

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raj5000

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Posted: 22 June 2007 at 11:30pm | IP Logged

Hey Minali always looking forward to hear your views! Smile

Originally posted by GUARDIAN ANGEL

Originally posted by raj5000

Who bears the marraige expenses? Girls folks / Guy'd folk OR marrying individuals?

ClapClapGreat topic Anshu.  Up  until few years back the girl's family used to bear expenses.  However, I see increasingly it is the marrying individuals who decide about expenses and share the cost in some way.  I think we are now following the western society and modern day expenses.

We have also seen that in lieu of presents, the couple ask for money.  A lot of times they have showers or "socials".  The socials are a big thing here in my Province.  The couple sell tickets for such events and provide food.  There is also a raffle sometimes.  It is a way of having some extra cash to pay for wedding expenses.

Well are you saying parents have no take on marraige celebrations all costs should be born by bride/groom? If yes I concur!

Well, have apart from debateable question above few more questions

1. Getting married in court and throwing a party for loved ones justifiable as compared to big shaow shaa thng?

Some couples do indeed just get married in Court and then just throwing a party to immediate family and friends. 

I know, but then they are unsubjectable to consider society as part of life. Since they are less anwerable to society, if u know what I mean.

2, Getting married as per societal norms - doesn't it is, more of soceital obligations rather personal commitments..

Yes it is more of a social obligation for a lot of times the couple donot even know all the guests as they are friends of family etc.  I feel some couples would prefer a small traditional wedding and save the money towards a home and appliances etc.  Big weddings are obligations because the parents feel they have to invite so and so as they had gone to someone else's son or daughter's wedding.

ConcurClap

3. Why parents have to pay for marraiges?

The parents still pay for the major part but they donot have to.  I know few close friends who already are planning their own wedding and if the parents insist they have asked for help towards a home or something else.  It is not fair that parents have to pay for the entire wedding but they can help out, both sides, for paying part of the cost i.e. reception.

Why yaa, am totally against it. Ok if they are so keen, fix deposit a joint account with all family members. Yup i don't disagree on a small engagement party at home, marraige per rituals in local temple, court maraige followed by reception reasonable place. End of story - marraige things resolves for me personally once commited to spouse, baki everythign is formalities and obligations.

Once again, great topic Anshu.ClapClap aww you got it, pleasure is all mine Embarrassed

 

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Vinzy

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Posted: 22 June 2007 at 11:33pm | IP Logged

Originally posted by raj5000

Omg you are funny.. LOL as read I feel Individuals should be responsible of marraige... big celebration or small doesn't matter, right :)

Ya we can enjoy small celebration toooo.....Smile

Individual ready baita hey..but kya kare ladki nahe milraa LOL Wink 

Dabulls23

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Dabulls23

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Posted: 22 June 2007 at 11:47pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by raj5000

Who bears the marraige expenses? Girls folks / Guy'd folk OR marrying individuals?

Nice topic Anshu Clap

Used to be Girl's parents host the wedding and reception was hosted by boy's parents.  Now the whole event is shared equally by both unless huge descrapancy in number or people from one side.  Than they can negotiate. 

For my sons wedding we as parents equally shared the expenseBig smile

Well, have apart from debateable question above few more questions

1. Getting married in court and throwing a party for loved ones justifiable as compared to big shaow shaa thng?

What ever the couple wants to do is fine with me. Miyan biwi raazi to kya karega Qazi Wink LOL

2, Getting married as per societal norms - doesn't it is, more of soceital obligations rather personal commitments..

Yes it can be social obligation.  I have seen at times couple do not even know some of the guests who are invited.  They probably would prefer more intimate wedding. Save money towards down payment of their first home. 

3. Why parents have to pay for marraiges?

If parents have money and they feel they want to pay for their children's wedding so do it with pride and honor not as obligation or duty.   Help out with what ever they can.  If they can't than kids should also understand.  I am sure there is some middle ground they can work out. Big smile

Morning_Dew

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Morning_Dew

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Posted: 23 June 2007 at 5:20am | IP Logged
Originally posted by raj5000

Who bears the marraige expenses? Girls folks / Guy'd folk OR marrying individuals?

hamain mittai kab mil rahi hay WinkLOL

Well, have apart from debateable question above few more questions

1. Getting married in court and throwing a party for loved ones justifiable as compared to big shaow shaa thng?

depend upon the mutual agreementSmile

2, Getting married as per societal norms - doesn't it is, more of soceital obligations rather personal commitments..

I don't know if you call it obligation ... eventually people accept the marraige.

 

3. Why parents have to pay for marraiges?

in our setup .. parents like to ..

 

Rituals are color of life .. it is true for marriage ritual too.. however I dont like huge expenditure over marriages where both parties have to take loan etc... just for showoff .. because it left virutally nothing for newly wed couple to enjoy during the most beautiful period of their life ..

Contribution from parents should be left entirely on their own will .. should be forced..Expenses are mainly responsibility of couple what ever they can easily afford ..if it is a plain marriage in temple court .. and later small party it should be ok ....and other people shouldn't object on this ..

As for other people .. you can't make them satisfy any way so why to bother.. I remember on one huge wedding gals parents virtually crumpled by expenses and yet people were not happy so forget about people if some one understand your point they would no matter what and if someone doesn't ..no matter what you do they wouldnt' LOL

chatbuster

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chatbuster

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Posted: 23 June 2007 at 10:13am | IP Logged

i think anyone but the groom should foot the wedding bills. let's see from his perspective. all he cares about is the gal and what she brings to the table. she? oh, she has to have her special day, doesn't she, white or red dress and all? she has to wear all that make up that's gonna get smeared soon as she starts crying anyway. she wants it, let her pay for it. better still, let her dad pay for it. he anyhows gotta lighten up sometimes, fat slug that he is. why not when he has to put his money where his mouth is? ok, maybe the guy's parents should also cough up. arent they going to be the ones who'll be getting all the bahu-service for free later on? see what i meant. make everyone pay for the show they want. anyone but the guy. Wink LOL

Morning_Dew

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Morning_Dew

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Posted: 23 June 2007 at 10:19am | IP Logged
LOL
Originally posted by qwertyesque

LOL

as compared to big shaow shaa thng?.. no i wanna show everybody i am getting married.. about 400-800 people

Why ??? are they not going to believe otherwise LOL

[/QUOTE]

tum bhi naa LOL

Gauri_3

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Posted: 23 June 2007 at 10:54am | IP Logged
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Dabulls23

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Dabulls23

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Posted: 23 June 2007 at 12:28pm | IP Logged

Originally posted by chatbuster


i think anyone but the groom should foot the wedding bills. let's see from his perspective. all he cares about is the gal and what she brings to the table. she? oh, she has to have her special day, doesn't she, white or red dress and all? she has to wear all that make up that's gonna get smeared soon as she starts crying anyway. she wants it, let her pay for it. better still, let her dad pay for it. he anyhows gotta lighten up sometimes, fat slug that he is. why not when he has to put his money where his mouth is? ok, maybe the guy's parents should also cough up. arent they going to be the ones who'll be getting all the bahu-service for free later on? see what i meant. make everyone pay for the show they want. anyone but the guy. Wink LOL

I say dream on Chatty boy for the first half of your answre !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wink LOL

And agree with 2nd half Clap Clapbut why should the guy be excused from paying for the wedding ring and his honeymoon Embarrassed

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