A lesson for Lawyers

Morgoth IF-Rockerz

Joined: 01 June 2004
Posts: 6831

Posted: 11 December 2004 at 1:53pm | IP Logged
Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.


In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand - a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"


She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."


The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"


She replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and >he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal >relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women, one of whom was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

 The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and in a very quiet voice said, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry behinds in jail for contempt."

Edited by MysticaMagic - 11 December 2004 at 1:54pm

rabeeak2003 IF-Dazzler

Joined: 26 August 2004
Posts: 3898

Posted: 11 December 2004 at 2:42pm | IP Logged
hehe! some problem with the judge too! thanks for sharing mystica!LOL
anniegupta_ Goldie

Joined: 25 August 2004
Posts: 1698

Posted: 11 December 2004 at 4:12pm | IP Logged
hehehe... i wonder wut the judge was hiding :S
HUMM IF-Dazzler

Joined: 06 November 2004
Posts: 2927

Posted: 12 December 2004 at 2:34am | IP Logged
hehehe that was a good one!!
thank for sharing it!! SmileSmileSmile
alliha Senior Member

Joined: 02 September 2004
Posts: 540

Posted: 12 December 2004 at 5:26pm | IP Logged
LOL LOL.....the judge is being naughty as well Wink
Rifhat Goldie

Joined: 29 August 2004
Posts: 1041

Posted: 13 December 2004 at 12:15pm | IP Logged

Hehe.. very funny.LOL


phalak Groupbie

Joined: 13 December 2004
Posts: 49

Posted: 13 December 2004 at 4:07pm | IP Logged
LOL prolly judge got on both their wives besides a few othersLOL
Minnie IF-Rockerz

Joined: 20 September 2004
Posts: 8633

Posted: 14 December 2004 at 9:25am | IP Logged
LOL gr8

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