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Joint family or a Nuclear family (Page 4)

jyoti06 Channel Moderator
jyoti06
jyoti06

Joined: 30 December 2006
Posts: 93120

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 8:04am | IP Logged

Originally posted by egghatcher

i have to agree with jyoti on the following
falling in love with the same guy et al.. thats logic making way for la la land dream on event Wink

Thats the only area where i m luckyBig smile

mcm226 IF-Sizzlerz
mcm226
mcm226

Joined: 11 October 2006
Posts: 16040

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 9:32am | IP Logged

Originally posted by ani11

A marriage is not only the union of two people but of two families as well.
I think its very mature on ur part that u r thinking about the idea of adjusting in a Joint family(JF) before getting married because if u won't give it a thought right now it can not only cause a rift between the family members but among u and ur husband as well...

As far as i am concerned i have grown up in a nuclear family and prefer a nuclear family...
A Joint family has its own advantages but sometimes the rift and the disagreements between the family members nulls and voids all those advantages....
If the family members are in constant disagreement it has a negative affect on the kids growing up in that house hold...
I think a proper discussion with ur would be is in order now because this can be a major bone of contention between the two of u....

i agree with aniji.....................n i think ke shud talk to ur would be,n unhe seedhe seedhe saaf sabdo me bata de ke aap joint family me kuch time to adjust kar sakti hai but puri life nahi........agar aapke wud be aapko samjhte hai to wo aapki baat se zarur sehmat honge....abhi sehmat nahi bhi huwe to shadi ke baad dhere-dhere pyaar se unko is baat ka ahsaas kara sakti hai aap,plz negative na souchte huwe tactfully handle kare situation ko........n achha souchogi to aage achha hi hoga,be positive yaar,yeh bhi ho sakta hai ke aapke in-laws ki joint family bohat hi achhi rahe............i think ke saare negative thoughts ko alag rakh kar khushi-khushi shadi kare ..............in advance wish u a very happy married life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
qwertyesque
qwertyesque

Joined: 03 December 2006
Posts: 5953

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 10:22am | IP Logged
if you wanna enjoy life in totality its joint family.. If you want just privacy and isolation its nuclear....

Smile
Dabulls23 IF-Stunnerz
Dabulls23
Dabulls23

Joined: 31 October 2005
Posts: 28777

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 11:16am | IP Logged
Nuclear family with option of joint family at reachable distance. Win-Win situation for everyone. Tongue
ani11 IF-Sizzlerz
ani11
ani11

Joined: 13 October 2005
Posts: 14996

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 12:01pm | IP Logged
.

Edited by ani11 - 08 October 2009 at 3:33pm
mcm226 IF-Sizzlerz
mcm226
mcm226

Joined: 11 October 2006
Posts: 16040

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 12:42pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by ani11

Originally posted by mcm226

Originally posted by ani11

A marriage is not only the union of two people but of two families as well.
I think its very mature on ur part that u r thinking about the idea of adjusting in a Joint family(JF) before getting married because if u won't give it a thought right now it can not only cause a rift between the family members but among u and ur husband as well...

As far as i am concerned i have grown up in a nuclear family and prefer a nuclear family...
A Joint family has its own advantages but sometimes the rift and the disagreements between the family members nulls and voids all those advantages....
If the family members are in constant disagreement it has a negative affect on the kids growing up in that house hold...
I think a proper discussion with ur would be is in order now because this can be a major bone of contention between the two of u....

i agree with aniji.....................n i think ke shud talk to ur would be,n unhe seedhe seedhe saaf sabdo me bata de ke aap joint family me kuch time to adjust kar sakti hai but puri life nahi........agar aapke wud be aapko samjhte hai to wo aapki baat se zarur sehmat honge....abhi sehmat nahi bhi huwe to shadi ke baad dhere-dhere pyaar se unko is baat ka ahsaas kara sakti hai aap,plz negative na souchte huwe tactfully handle kare situation ko........n achha souchogi to aage achha hi hoga,be positive yaar,yeh bhi ho sakta hai ke aapke in-laws ki joint family bohat hi achhi rahe............i think ke saare negative thoughts ko alag rakh kar khushi-khushi shadi kare ..............in advance wish u a very happy married life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Mandy for agreeing ..

while ur thoughts are beautiful but i don't agree on the highlighted part....I think the time to talk is now and not after marriage in the hope that the husband would listen afterwards.....she has identified a major potential problem big enough to break her marriage apart and to ignore it and go ahead and marry would be risky as per my opinion..........some people can't be sweet talked......speaking from experience here...LOL...my hubby and i had talked on certain issues before we got married and he still stands by those(luckily they are not big enough to shake the foundation of our marriage)Embarrassed.......or maybe i am not enough of a sweet talker..ConfusedLOL.........someone has identified athe point is if  problem then why wait for tommorow to solve it......why not today especially if its something as delicate as a marriage....my good wishes are with jyoti too...Embarrassed

oh oh,experience hai to than u r right........n i agree on the red colored part......but here is one thing  she is saying na ke she fell in love with her wud be husband................ab jab love hai n adjustment ka soucha hai isliye maine aisa kaha tha.............kuch paane ke liye kuch khona bhi padta hai....joint families bhi achhi ho sakti hai,pehle se negative thought ke saath new relationship me enter karna thik to nahi na,at least ek chance to dena hi chahiye is this what i think...........

jyoti06 Channel Moderator
jyoti06
jyoti06

Joined: 30 December 2006
Posts: 93120

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 12:45pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by ani11

Originally posted by mcm226

Originally posted by ani11

A marriage is not only the union of two people but of two families as well.
I think its very mature on ur part that u r thinking about the idea of adjusting in a Joint family(JF) before getting married because if u won't give it a thought right now it can not only cause a rift between the family members but among u and ur husband as well...

As far as i am concerned i have grown up in a nuclear family and prefer a nuclear family...
A Joint family has its own advantages but sometimes the rift and the disagreements between the family members nulls and voids all those advantages....
If the family members are in constant disagreement it has a negative affect on the kids growing up in that house hold...
I think a proper discussion with ur would be is in order now because this can be a major bone of contention between the two of u....

i agree with aniji.....................n i think ke shud talk to ur would be,n unhe seedhe seedhe saaf sabdo me bata de ke aap joint family me kuch time to adjust kar sakti hai but puri life nahi........agar aapke wud be aapko samjhte hai to wo aapki baat se zarur sehmat honge....abhi sehmat nahi bhi huwe to shadi ke baad dhere-dhere pyaar se unko is baat ka ahsaas kara sakti hai aap,plz negative na souchte huwe tactfully handle kare situation ko........n achha souchogi to aage achha hi hoga,be positive yaar,yeh bhi ho sakta hai ke aapke in-laws ki joint family bohat hi achhi rahe............i think ke saare negative thoughts ko alag rakh kar khushi-khushi shadi kare ..............in advance wish u a very happy married life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Mandy for agreeing ..

while ur thoughts are beautiful but i don't agree on the highlighted part....I think the time to talk is now and not after marriage in the hope that the husband would listen afterwards.....she has identified a major potential problem big enough to break her marriage apart and to ignore it and go ahead and marry would be risky as per my opinion..........some people can't be sweet talked......speaking from experience here...LOL...my hubby and i had talked on certain issues before we got married and he still stands by those(luckily they are not big enough to shake the foundation of our marriage)Embarrassed.......or maybe i am not enough of a sweet talker..ConfusedLOL.........the point is if someone has identified a problem then why wait for tommorow to solve it......why not today especially if its something as delicate as a marriage....my good wishes are with jyoti too...Embarrassed

Ani and mcm226 thanks a lot for your wishesEmbarrassed

and i agree with u Ani ,its very necessary to solve such delicate matters before marriage itself,provided he should not misunderstand me that i m trying to separate him from his familyConfused..i don't want to b termed as a homebreaker by his family...but anyways i hv the ability to adjust myself in a joint family(if no option is leftConfused) but mayb today's daily saas-bahu soaps r scaring me to hellConfusedLOL...somwtimes i feel gharjamai is a better optionLOLWink

mcm226 IF-Sizzlerz
mcm226
mcm226

Joined: 11 October 2006
Posts: 16040

Posted: 06 April 2007 at 12:52pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by jyoti06

[

Ani and mcm226 thanks a lot for your wishesEmbarrassed

and i agree with u Ani ,its very necessary to solve such delicate matters before marriage itself,provided he should not misunderstand me that i m trying to separate him from his familyConfused..i don't want to b termed as a homebreaker by his family...but anyways i hv the ability to adjust myself in a joint family(if no option is leftConfused) but mayb today's daily saas-bahu soaps r scaring me to hellConfusedLOL...somwtimes i feel gharjamai is a better optionLOLWink

sometimes?i always feel thisWinkLOLLOL...........

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