Now that I think back, I wish I had refrained from doing that. When I knew that I should be writing an essay for college, why did I write a note to Sahana instead? It was futile and there was no reason to deceive myself. We were two religions apart and that was the difference between the grass and the sky.
However, then, I thought I had made a wise choice. That night, I lay down on my bed, with my arms behind my head, and stared at the ceiling, in anticipation of tomorrow.
As I thought of how the moment that I confessed my admiration would be, my phone vibrated next to me. I ignored it for a couple of seconds, but when it persisted, I put it to my ear.
"Hello?"
"You're an idiot," I heard Kriti say.
"What?" I asked, sitting upright, confused.
"That note ended up in my locker, not hers."
"Aw, how did that happen?"
"I don't know…you tell me?" Kriti said.
"Wait, I followed her to her locker and placed the note between that little space thingy," I explained. "How did it end up in your locker?"
"Because she puts her stuff in my locker sometimes since her locker is all the way on the 5th floor."
"Damn," I said, hiding my face in my pillow. "Damn, damn, damn. And I was so happy."
"Don't have a heart attack Rahil. I saw it and went upstairs and put it in her locker," Kriti said with a small laugh.
"Oh…God, now I feel butterflies in my stomach. I don't know why. Maybe I shouldn't have written that note," I groaned.
"No, no. Don't worry about it," Kriti interrupted. "Tomorrow morning, she'll see it, and then she'll tell me her reaction, and in turn, I'll tell you. Don't stress."
Filled with some new hope, I gave a tight smile. "Alright, talk to you tomorrow. Promise to tell me what happens, okay?"
"Definitely. Now go back to sleep and have those sweet dreams you were having earlier. Good night."
"Night."
*
"Oh come on! Why won't you tell me?" I asked, following Kriti.
"I'll tell you later," Kriti said, walking away from me.
"Kriti…."
"Rahil…."
"Please?"
"Fine," she said, turning around. "But don't get upset, alright?"
My heart sunk and I felt its weight transfix me to the spot. Taking a deep courageous breath, I nodded. "Okay."
"She read it, assumed it was a joke someone was playing on her, and went to class."
"What? That's all?" I asked, sighing. "But why would she assume it was a joke? I didn't say anything mean…"
"She has low self-esteem. She doesn't think it's possible for any guy to like her," Kriti explained with a shrug. After a pause, she added, "Rahil, maybe you should just leave it. It's just an infatuation and I don't want two heartbroken friends resulting from it."
"No, it's not an infatuation and I'm not going to leave it just like that," I said, shaking my head. "I like her and I'm not going to give up until she believes me. What happens after that is beyond me, but I'm going to try my best to make it work."
"Rahil…"
"I'll see you later Kriti."
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