Posted: 04 May 2016 at 3:09pm | IP Logged
She didn't say anything while he was driving. She just sat in the passenger seat with silent tears running down her face. He stopped at his beach house and she got out. She was like someone in a trance. She walked in with him and sat on the couch. She sat there for a long time just staring at the ocean. He didn't say anything either. He just left her to get out of the state that she was in. Besides, he didn't know what to say. He just couldn't let her walk out of there like that on her own. He wondered if she even knew he was there or how she got here.
Finally she came out of her trance.
"This is a lovely place. Whose house is it?"
"It's has a tranquil feeling to it. I could stay here forever, just like this."
"Yes, I come here when I need to be alone or have to work through things. To think and clear my head."
"Why did you bring me here?"
"I don't know. I suppose because it's where I come when I am upset and I could see that you were upset. I'm sorry about ma."
"You don't have to apologise for her. It's nothing that I didn't expect. I seem to bring out the worst in her."
"But none the less. I am sorry. I brought you to our house and since you arrived there she has been giving you grief. At least today she could have been sensitive about the situation."
"She is a mother too. How would she have felt in your shoes? What if she lost a baby? What if she could never ..." he stopped.
"Say it Yash. Finish your sentence. I have come to terms with it"
"Have you? Really? Then why did you collapse in my arms when you left our house. Why were you crying, why did you allow me to bring you here. You can lie to yourself Aarti, but you can't lie to me."
"You know nothing about me. You don't know how I feel. How would you. You never wanted a baby. What difference would it make to you if you never have a child? And even so, you can have children. You can take another wife and have children. But me, I don't have the option. So don't presume to know how I feel.
"Then tell me how you feel."
"We don't have that kind of relationship. We don't share our feelings."
"Fine. You just keep your feelings to yourself. Just like you kept my child to yourself. You were just going to take my child and leave the country. What right did you have to do that? What right did you have to keep my child a secret? And when I learnt of the child was the day that ... that ... You had no right Aarti."
"You made it clear that you wanted no emotional entanglements."
"Yes I said that, and you took it to mean that I would not want my own child. You assumed that I don't want my own child. You assumed that I was so heartless that I would discard my child. You never gave me the opportunity you just decided for me. Because to you I am less than human"
"What else was I supposed to think after we... after that awful encounter. And you didn't even come see me once since ... "
"And how would you have reacted if I came. Accepted me with open arms."
"I suppose not. Things worked out as it was supposed to. Now we can go on with our lives. And it's no use prolonging things, we should get divorced as soon as possible."
"So our baby died so that we could go on with our lives is that it."
"That's not what I said."
"Let me take you home. You must not be able to bare to spend another moment with a heartless bas***d like me. Someone with no feelings, no heart. Someone that can't even love his own child, isn't it. Well you are right. I didn't deserve to be a father that's why the baby died. And that day I pulled you just before you lost the baby. I wasn't worthy of being a child father. That's why the baby was snatched away from us. It's all my fault" he grabbed his keys and started walking towards the door.
She was shocked to see the anguish and pain on his face. His eyes brimming with tears. She had never seen him like this before. Such vulnerability. She could not endure his pain. She never considered that he too had suffered the loss of their baby. She felt so selfish. She couldn't let him go like this.
"Yash. Is that what you think? It's not your fault. You had nothing to do with me losing the baby. It is my fault. Ma, has explained why. You know it's a condition I have. You can't blame yourself."
"I said lets go."
"Yash" she went to him and held onto his arm. "Yash, look at me. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I have never even considered that you suffered too. I've been so selfish. I have been accusing you all the time and here I am no better. Just thinking about my own pain. I'm so sorry." She was speaking through sobs.
He turned around his face wet with tears too. They embraced each other. For the first time, they were grieving their loss together. All this time, they had been trying to be strong and brave not feeling deserving of venting their feelings for the loss. For the first time they really mourned, they finally let go and gave vent to their grief. They sank down on the floor and cried in each others arms for a long time.
Finally, she wiped his tears.
"I really am sorry, Yash."
"I'm sorry too. And it's not your fault. You have a medical condition, like you said. I was at the hospital that day. And I saw Ma Bauji and Pari crying. I heard what Ma said about your losing the baby and not being able to have another. I couldn't face you Aarti. I left and I never came back. I couldn't face you."
"Maybe it was for the best. I don't know how I would have re-acted to you. But we can't do anything about the past now."
"And what about the future?"
She moved away from him and started to get up.
"It's been more than a year Yash. We should finalise things now. We should really start divorce proceedings."
"That's what you want?"
"What else is there?"
"We can choose to make our marriage work."
"When did we have a marriage Yash? When did we have a relationship? You set out to make me yours for some bizarre reason and when I gave myself to you didn't want me. We have been apart for more time that we have been together. What is there to work on?"
"Fine, then let's forget the past. Let's make a fresh start."
She was shocked that he would suggest this. She couldn't understand why. "Why?"
"You are my wife."
"So you have to keep me, is that it."
"No Aarti, that's never been it. I was stupid and proud and that is why I said that to Aaman. But I do want you to be with me. I want us to have a marriage, a relationship"
She was confused. She still didn't understand. This Yash Scindiya was new to her. But either way he couldn't do it.
"No, it's too late for that. I want a divorce."
"Does the fact that I am still in the country tell you nothing. There is nothing but friendship between Prashant and I. But there can never be anything between us either."
"You need to move on. You can get married again. You can have children."
"What if I only want you?"
She looked up at him. She was once again shocked and upset. She couldn't handle where this conversation was going. She didn't want to explore that question or the look that she saw in his eyes. She wanted to escape.
"Please take me home." She started to walk to the door.
"We can go Aarti, once you answered me."
"There is no future for us. Accept it Yash."
"I can't. I love you."
"I want to go home."
"Aarti, I love you." he said softly.
"I heard you. Now please take me home."
"Do you have nothing to say about that?"
"I told you, I want a divorce." She was standing facing away from him. She was at the door. He walked to stand behind her.
"I love you" he whispered in her ear.
"Stop saying that" she said, also softly.
"I can't ... please can we go."
"Why is this upsetting you so? Is it because you love me too?"
"No" she said swallowing hard.
"You love me Aarti"
"No" she whispered.
"Look at me and tell me that you don't love me."
"No" she said again.
He turned her around and put his hand under her chin and made her look at him.
"You love me, don't you Aarti"
"Yes" she said and started crying and he held her again.
"Come back to me. We can make a life together. We have a perfect start now. With love we can't go wrong."
"I can't come back to you. I can't give you a child. It's not fair on you."
"That doesn't matter to me. And besides there are other options these days. Adoption of surrogacy. We can have as many children as you want."
She pushed out of his embrace. She looked at him with agony in her eyes.
"You don't understand. I want my own child. I want to give birth to my own child. How can I be a complete woman otherwise?"
"Aarti, you are a modern woman in every way, why do you still think like that."
"I know it's not rational but it's how I feel and I can't stop it. I can't stop it!"
"Then we can face this together. Give me chance to be a real husband to you please. One that will stand by you in every situation."
"And your mother? She hates me."
"We don't have to live there. I have been doing my own thing for a long time now. We can live anywhere you want to."
"And your family. I know how much you love your brothers and the children. Vedikha and Vendant adore you and so will Ansh soon. You won't be happy living without them."
"I am not happy living without you. We can still see them. We can go visit them and they can visit us. I need you more than I need them."
"I can't Yash. Please understand. Too many things are against us."
"But we have the greatest thing for us. We have love. I love you more than I thought I could ever love someone. More than I have ever loved anybody"
She took step forward and embraced him. She pulled his head down and kissed him. Though shocked, he responded. He had been dreaming of this moment. It was as amazing to feel her in arms and his lips on his. Her arms were around his neck and her hands in his hair. He felt her desperation and his need matched hers. He held her closer and cupped her buttocks and pressed her into him. His one hand moved back up to removed her pallu and rubbed her nipple with his thumb. He could feel her shiver from that action. Her hands moved to start unbuttoning his sherwani. Her lips left his and started ravishing his neck, moving down to his neck. Taking first one nipple in her mouth and then the other. He hands rubbing his muscular stomach and moving to his back. He loved the touch of her hands on him. Her hands came back around and moved steadily downward. But her grabbed her hands and started kissing her again. He wanted her so much. His whole body screamed to have her but reason prevailed.
"No love, not yet" he breathed in her mouth.
"Why" she said almost tearfully.
"Because I won't risk it. When we do this, I will be sure pre-cautions are taken."
"But were are married."
"I know and you know why I am doing this. I won't let you fall pregnant again. I love you too much to see you go through that again."
She pushed out of his arms again.
"Take me home."
"I'll take you to your parents' home for now, but soon we will be together in every way" he said meaningfully.
The drive home was silent. He grabbed her and held it till they reached her parents. She got out of the car and walked briskly to the door, but he reached her quickly. Before she could enter, he kissed her soundly.
He opened the door and indicated to her she could go in. Her parents were sitting there, looking at them as they stood at the door.
"Ma, Bauji" Yash nodded and left.
Aarti didn't say anything. She just walked up the stairs to her room.
She tried to sleep, but she couldn't. She thought because she had gotten up earlier than she usually did she would be able to sleep, but she couldn't. She tried to work but she couldn't. She could only think of him. And when she did, her body did crazy things.
She kept looking at her phone. Why was she so disappointed that he didn't contact her for the whole day? That's what she wanted, wasn't it? She wanted nothing to do with him. But he said he loved and he wanted to be with her, then why didn't her call her. That's it she thought, she was letting this man waste her valuable time. She started with great difficulty to work again. When she heard her phone ring she grabbed and it was indeed the call that she was waiting on.
"Hello" she said.
"How is my cute little night owl?"
"Owls are not cute to my knowledge."
"Ok what nocturnal animal do you consider cute."
"I don't know. I have to investigate and get back to you."
"Ok, you do that."
"Why are you calling me at this hour?"
"Because I know you sleep your day away and work at night."
"Fine, then why are you calling me at all?"
"Because I want to see you."
"Meet me at the beach house for lunch."
"Can't wait to see you"
"You are not listening to me again."
"Wear something sexy"
"See you tomorrow. I love you. Good night" he said and disconnected the call.
How dare he? She would not go.
He was so anxious. He wasn't sure that she would come. He was ecstatic when he saw her and laughed at her expression when he opened the door for her. She looked angry. She was there but she defiantly wore the least sexy outfit she owned.
"Hello, my darling. I see, you remember what I told you a while ago about those plain sarrees. I'm so glad"
She closed her eyes. She had forgotten. Why did he always have the upper hand?
"You told me to come for lunch. Where is the food?"
He led her to the dining room and the table was set to for 2.
"Did you do this?"
"I would love to take the credit but no. Bhawari did."
"Who is that?"
"She works for me."
"Oh" she said sat down at the table.
"I'm glad you came." he said and kissed her softly and moved to his chair.
"This is the last time."
"Well then we better make it good" he said.
She fought him at every turn. She was really very witty her thought. That's what he loved about her. She was never in awe of him or intimidated by him like most people. She stood up to him. She wasn't an easy conquest but he conquered her heart as she did his and he was sure the rest would follow. As soon as they had finished eating, she got up and wanted to clear up. He took the dishes out of her hands.
"You are not wasting precious time doing the dishes. And I have a promise to fulfil" he said as he removed her pallu and pulled her close to him. His mouth came down on hers. She didn't even pretend that she didn't want him. They both knew why she was there. He undressed her slowly, touching and caressing her body with his hands and his eyes. Tills she stood gloriously naked before him.
"You are so beautiful. I missed this, I missed you."
He kissed her again, and lifted her and she put her legs around him as he walked with her to the bedroom. He lay her down on the bed and said.
"I am sorry about our first time. I will always regret it, but I will try and make up for it, the rest of our lives."
He got undressed and knelt between her legs as he kissed every inch of her body. She was in heaven. And when her reached her centre and started his exploration with his mouth, she exploded almost instantaneously, screaming his name in complete and utter ecstasy.
She was ready for him, but this time as he said he had taken precautions so he made ready for her. She looked away. She didn't want to face the reality of what that meant, and she was still not looking at him when she felt his warm hard shaft enter her. The pleasure that she felt before, paled in comparison. She forgot about everything else but the wave after wave of pleasure that engulfed her. There was nothing like this. The love that they share was incomparable. Finally he could not hold on anymore. He didn't want to stop but she drove him crazy. And when he felt her release, he let go too so that they could share the pleasure at the same time.
They lay together. Their sweaty bodies still clinging to each other.
"That was incredible Yash. I have never experienced anything like that before."
"Neither have I"
"Yes, really. I have never made love before. All the other times is it was just a physical release, lust. But this was love and that is why it was so incredible.
"I love you" she said. And she started kissing him again, and soon they were as aroused as they were just moments before.
"When can I see you again" he asked afterwards.
"Tomorrow. We can meet here again."
"I work normal hours, sweetheart. We can't keep this up. Move in here with me. You love this place."
She looked away.
"I'll see you tomorrow Yash." she kissed him on the cheek and left. They both felt sad, for this last bit put a damper on their afternoon of passion.
It was 12H01am when her phone rang.
"Good morning, Mr. Scindiya."
"You said, you would see me today."
"Yes, I will see you later."
"Yash, I can't come to the beach house now."
"Who said anything about the beach house? Come down to the garden."
"What" she said as she bolted her balcony. He was standing downstairs and had arranged a picnic with for them, complete with fairy lights, a blanket and everything.
She laughed and shook her head. Then she ran downstairs, out the door and into his arms.
"You are crazy"
"Yes, crazy for you."
"And this food?"
"It's not really food. It's more sweets and a flask of coffee, you know for afterwards"
"Yash, we can't do it in my parent's garden."
"This spot is very secluded. No one will see us and I'm sure your parents are sound asleep. So, what's stopping us?"
"Absolutely nothing" She said and started kissing him.
The blanket was forgotten as their clothes were discarded and they sank down on the wet grass. He made sure he was at the bottom. He mounted her on top of him and at first she was a bit shy but as her passion took over, she drove him wild with pleasure. And they both reached climax quickly and they enjoyed the dessert after their dessert, finally lying in each other's arms on the blanket till sunrise.