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kaya ss broken dreams part 22 on page 69 (DISCONTINUED) (Page 3)

Aazeen02 IF-Sizzlerz
Aazeen02
Aazeen02

Joined: 22 March 2012
Posts: 11699

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 12:59am | IP Logged
Alright!
Read the first chapter too...
First of all, congratulations on your maiden work...
The concept by you is great...
It's something different...
eager to know what conspired between the two to have landed in such a mess...
Apart from all this, I have a few suggestions for you as well... If you feel okay about it, otherwise I don't intend to intrude obviously...
1. I know your exam is about to begin, so you kept it short, that's fine... But as a reader and a writer for a few years now, I can obviously suggest you that, spend time with your script, with each update... You can't always run with writing and posting it immediately... Take a bit more time, read what you wrote in the first go, and make bit of more detailing into the scenes... You would be astounded to see your updates will take a better shape and shall be more meaty.. (It's obviously a suggestion dear... I didn't intend to hurt you... When you can conceptualize a plot, you can definitely write it better, and I know you can do that..)

2. Dear, carefully choose the font color you post your updates with... I would personally suggest never to use lighter shades into writing updates of stories, coz all that you write is all the reader can read.. And colours like light green, yellow and light pink would need readers to strain too much to read the update, and in cases he may skip it coz he can't keep on doing that.. So, in my suggestion, take dark, bright colors to catch the attention of the readers...

That's all from my side for now... I again am saying, I was just suggesting, if you felt bad, I am already sorry dear...

Take care

Aazeen

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

Liza10piyali_6eufara_naghm

Prasu1095 Senior Member
Prasu1095
Prasu1095

Joined: 20 February 2016
Posts: 489

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 1:12am | IP Logged
They both lv each other but now kabir hates her.vry diff.concept i eagerly wnt to read ch.1

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

piyali_6eufara_naghm

eufara_naghm Goldie
eufara_naghm
eufara_naghm

Joined: 14 February 2016
Posts: 1456

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 1:41am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Aazeen02

Alright!
Read the first chapter too...
First of all, congratulations on your maiden work...
The concept by you is great...
It's something different...
eager to know what conspired between the two to have landed in such a mess...
Apart from all this, I have a few suggestions for you as well... If you feel okay about it, otherwise I don't intend to intrude obviously...
1. I know your exam is about to begin, so you kept it short, that's fine... But as a reader and a writer for a few years now, I can obviously suggest you that, spend time with your script, with each update... You can't always run with writing and posting it immediately... Take a bit more time, read what you wrote in the first go, and make bit of more detailing into the scenes... You would be astounded to see your updates will take a better shape and shall be more meaty.. (It's obviously a suggestion dear... I didn't intend to hurt you... When you can conceptualize a plot, you can definitely write it better, and I know you can do that..)

2. Dear, carefully choose the font color you post your updates with... I would personally suggest never to use lighter shades into writing updates of stories, coz all that you write is all the reader can read.. And colours like light green, yellow and light pink would need readers to strain too much to read the update, and in cases he may skip it coz he can't keep on doing that.. So, in my suggestion, take dark, bright colors to catch the attention of the readers...

That's all from my side for now... I again am saying, I was just suggesting, if you felt bad, I am already sorry dear...

Take care

Aazeen
Thank u very much dear. Smile
I m new so it means a lot to me. 
I will remember all ur suggestions


Edited by siramani - 26 April 2016 at 1:42am

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

piyali_6

eufara_naghm Goldie
eufara_naghm
eufara_naghm

Joined: 14 February 2016
Posts: 1456

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 1:46am | IP Logged
Originally posted by MistiofMistz

So far Chapter 1 is looking great! I will give detail review on Wednesday during my day off. Big smile
Thank u very muchEmbarrassed
eufara_naghm Goldie
eufara_naghm
eufara_naghm

Joined: 14 February 2016
Posts: 1456

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 1:47am | IP Logged
Originally posted by prasannakamila

They both lv each other but now kabir hates her.vry diff.concept i eagerly wnt to read ch.1
Tongue

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

piyali_6

xFawadKhanx Goldie
xFawadKhanx
xFawadKhanx

Joined: 09 February 2016
Posts: 1162

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 2:35am | IP Logged
The first part was very interesting
Totally amazing
excited to know what happens further
And yes thanks for the pm

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

piyali_6eufara_naghm

zinya Groupbie
zinya
zinya

Joined: 05 January 2016
Posts: 55

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 2:43am | IP Logged
Amazing update dear... Clap

All the best for your exams... Wink

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

piyali_6eufara_naghm

vssdp Goldie
vssdp
vssdp

Joined: 08 May 2015
Posts: 2002

Posted: 26 April 2016 at 2:53am | IP Logged
Awesome part 
The Tashan between two will be worth reading 
Continue soon and thanks for the pm 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

eufara_naghm

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