Madhureeta Mukherjee (BOMBAY TIMES; May 25, 2016)Theirs was a fairy-tale romance -with exotic vacations, spectacular celebrations, lavish dates on faraway islands and dazzling 'fireworks'. Literally, too. Of course, and selfies that spilled their story bit by bit. In an ultimate romantic style, last New Year's eve, Karan Singh Grover went down on his knees and proposed to his ladylove Bipasha Basu. It seemed no less than a perfectly scripted romantic movie, though he says it was spontaneous and it felt like the "right moment." There were fireworks lighting up the night skies on a stunning beach, elated spirits and sounds of cheer. Amidst all that, he popped the question. In a state of daze, she said, "Okay." He said, "I will take that as a yes." Months later, they took their wedding vows, and the grand day was planned by the beautiful bride herself. In their first interview post shaadi, Bipasha (looking lovely with a touch of sindoor on her forehead) and Karan talk about the wedding hangover, and their new beginnings. Read on...
So how's the post shaadi effect? Or should I ask is there any shaadi ke side effects?
Bipasha: It's been less than a month since the wedding, so I'm guessing it's too early for side effects. Honestly, the two months before the wedding was strenuous for me, as I was the event manager for my own wedding. I felt no jitters absolutely; in fact, I had the best time of my life during those two days of the wedding. My mom said that I was like a hooligan of a bride. I am still reeling under the effect of the wedding. I was particular about every minute detail.
Karan: Being particular is an understatement, she was anal about everything, and she just wouldn't rest. Few days after the wedding, she woke up in the middle of the night and asked me about which security is handling which door and where are the guests entering from.
Bipasha: I guess it's the wedding hangover!
So tell us about the moment when he popped the question?
Bipasha: Well, I believed in marriage, but I never thought I would get married. So when he proposed, my first reaction was...'what are you telling me?' And...
Karan: ...Let me complete the story for you. We were in Koh Samui, it was December 31 and the sky was lit with fireworks. I was carrying the ring with me and something told me that this is the right time. So while she was capturing the fireworks on video, I took the opportunity and gave her the ring. And guess what? Her expression was that of someone who was going to be murdered, like in some of her films. Just picture this...I am on my knees for 10 minutes and between sobs she tells me...'What's wrong with you, why do you want to marry me? I am not supposed to get married.' Finally, she said...'Okay'. To me it sounded like a yes, so I said I will take that.
Dating is one thing. Marriage is something else. Now that you are living together, does it feel different?
Bipasha: Our relationship started as deep friendship, not the Bollywood kind of 'good friends'. I have never met anyone who is so much like me, who is not judgmental about anything in the world and who sees the good in everything. So we are very compatible as partners. Living with him is easy, as he does a lot of household stuff and doesn't expect me to do it. I must say that I feel pampered and he treats me like a princess. My friends tell me that Karan is like a foreigner, as you don't often see Indian men do much of household chores. I genuinely feel happy to see him doing the things he loves doing, like vocal training or painting. I like people with passion and it inspires me. I know that I have a partner who just lets me be, though I don't let him be (laughs!). He is not allowed to just be.
Karan: Hey, see she said it, I didn't. On another note, Bipasha was someone who I didn't know for long and who wasn't family (back then), yet, she gave me all the strength and support which no one ever did.
You were open about your relationships in the past, Bipasha. This time around, you were tight-lipped. Why? Though you couldn't stop posting cute pics on social media?
Bipasha: I guess I was still figuring out our relationship, so I didn't want to talk about it and label it right away. Frankly, there was no real plan to talk or not talk about it. We were living our life, and it didn't stop us from going on holidays and doing our own thing.
Bipasha, we heard that your parents took a while to accept Karan and they had reservations about him?
Bipasha: I don't know why the media kept making our parents sound like some villains. I am very close to my parents, but over the years they've had no control over what I have done in my life. They know I am responsible, and I know that they will always be protective about me. My parents didn't know Karan, but when they saw me so happy, they just came around. He met my mom first; he met my dad much later. My dad never makes quick opinions about people; he likes to build a rapport. I guess they are in a place where they will build a relationship with him.
Karan: Yes, I met her parents in instalments. I met her mom at her birthday party. Bipasha is exactly like her mom - a gorgeous, fiery lady. The first time I met her I touched her feet and I hugged her for really long. I guess that broke the ice and I remember that we even danced that night. Her dad and I shook hands at arms distance at first. Now we hug. At the wedding I kissed his cheeks couple of times. Chance pe dance (laughs!).
Bipasha: Karan's family is very accepting, and I had started talking to them on facetime long before the wedding. Over the last two to three years, his parents have seen him change as a person, for the better. He had a lot of baggage around him, but slowly the choices that he made for himself started changing and his parents saw him coming back into his own self again. It is like starting life from scratch. These choices require a lot of strength. I don't take any credit for that.
Karan (looks at her lovingly and says): These choices require a lot of strength from your partner, too. It's just that sometimes you drift away from your real self, and when your life is a little empty you fill it up with things you don't want. Then you realise what your life is all about and all those things start changing. It takes a lot of effort and encouragement.
Karan was married twice before; did that ever bother you, Bipasha?
Bipasha: It didn't bother me and we spoke about it. I believe that everyone has a journey, and it is very easy for anyone to exclaim, "Oh...this is his third marriage, nahin chalega...divorce ho jaayega." I tell people that you have to be in someone's shoes to know their story and understand their journey. This world is full of cynics, and thankfully, I have never been cynical no matter what has happened in my life. I have always been a believer. And Karan is like that, too. I feel I am lucky, as I live only for love. And no man has given me more love and respect than Karan. I might not be looking for the same thing in marriage, like others do. I have my own checklist, and I have ticked my boxes accordingly. And I believe you can't judge anyone for their bad relationships. I have had bad relationships, and I could have been easily married twice. The relationship could have been as deep, but I didn't fall into the legality and that is the only difference. You can't condemn someone on the basis of a piece of paper.
Karan, have you ever won an argument with her? There's a saying that goes... Marriage is a relationship where one person is always right and the other is the husband.
Karan (his quickest response in this interview): No! I have never won an argument with her, and I don't try. There is no point. It's not because she is better at it, but she is mostly right. It is irritating, but 99 per cent of the time she is right. I can argue and scream as much as I want, but at the back of my head when I know that she's right, it is a pointless battle.
Bipasha: I'm usually right! (with a naughty grin)
Karan: Yeah, yeah, she must be thinking...it's a curse; I am always right, I don't know what to do.
Any lovers' tiff, yet?
Karan: Well, we haven't really had a lovers' tiff, but I am somebody who likes to do things in my own relaxed pace. And she wants everything done - now! I am aware that I'm supposed to do something, but she will keep reminding me every 10 minutes.
Bipasha (teasingly tells him): I am never going to change that stand, everything for me is - now. It's been a rule since childhood. I am older than you, so listen to me.
Karan: While that may be right, you know how I describe her? She's a small, crazy child stuck in a hot woman's body.
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