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Just a few thoughts on Raman, a few more thoughts added on page 3!! (Page 3)

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 9:56am | IP Logged
Hi Zoya - welcome to IF!  

This is a wonderful post because you have added such depth to Raman.  In a time where only his harsh words seem to resonate, you have brought back beauty and intentionality to the character.  I would hope the makers continue to have this view on Raman because I completely agree that this is what Raman's original characterization was like but since the time slot change it was harder to find the flow in his characterization.  

As IshRa are my favorite desi TV couple and Ishita 1.0 was one of the most well-written FLs I have seen, Raman is my favorite desi TV male character after watching a lot of shows, but it's frustrating when he's taken to supreme extremes, but you shed a different perspective on everything.   

I hope as this post leap track continues to unravel at such a slow pace - we are able to see some of these layers you speak of come out (despite their love for MU-based drama). Heart


Edited by -K.13- - 24 April 2016 at 10:08am

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 10:16am | IP Logged
Thank you all for such a warm welcome!!! I personally watched all of the online up to September, this year, and am currently building up a bank of episodes to catch up on. I'm an emotional fool and have declared a boycott on the show until Raman and Ishita at least begin to resolve the issues they face, and some much needed happiness returns to the show. 
I currently keep up with written updates. I live in England and the whole 'binge watching' Netflix culture I am now applying to this show. Until then therefore, I think I am going to make theses type of posts and maybe write some stories.


I feel like before the time slot change, there was more time given to why Raman and Ishita behaved they way they do. I actually do think Raman is incredibly volatile, and in all honesty Ishita bears the brunt of Shagun madam's mistakes. But similarly, I also think the reason Ishita is terrified at first of intimacy with Raman is because she got rejected at the last minute by Subbu. Her past too terrifies her that she could still be rejected again at any minute. Let's remember, she was engaged twice, before Raavan kumar came along. Raman himself mentions on a few occasions that she was a rejectee! Now after time slot change, and to add drama, Raman rants first, and then is not given enough time to explain his thought process, so it appears Raman isn't thinking at all. Similarly,  Ishita's constant need for reassurance that she is important to the family, and to Raman means she plays the self sacrificing martyr many many times. I think the idea that she will always feel inferior to Shagun, as she cannot be raman's first love should really be explored in more depth. I feel like even Raman doesn't recognise how difficult this is for  Ishita. I think if Raman found it hard to trust, Ishita may find it even harder. Her insecurity stemmed from something she can't change. Raman however did change. He transformed himself. I really think therefore, that Whilst yes after more than two years of marriage, Ishita should trust Raman, when it comes to Ruhi, she may never trust anyone else. Not even Raman. I actually think Ishita as a character will always find ultimate trust just as difficult as Raman does. But Ishita being the more level headed, calm and collected one, does not lash out at the drop of a hat because of this...unlike Raman

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 10:23am | IP Logged
Hi... Welcome to IF... This is such a beautiful description of what Raman's character is... I read some where that it is easier to hate because when a person stops hating he begins hurting... And Raman's insecurities clearly show that he has this facade of hate so that he doesn't feel pain! 

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 10:26am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Zoyamalik2005

Thank you all for such a warm welcome!!! I personally watched all of the online up to September, this year, and am currently building up a bank of episodes to catch up on. I'm an emotional fool and have declared a boycott on the show until Raman and Ishita at least begin to resolve the issues they face, and some much needed happiness returns to the show. 
I currently keep up with written updates. I live in England and the whole 'binge watching' Netflix culture I am now applying to this show. Until then therefore, I think I am going to make theses type of posts and maybe write some stories.


I feel like before the time slot change, there was more time given to why Raman and Ishita behaved they way they do. I actually do think Raman is incredibly volatile, and in all honesty Ishita bears the brunt of Shagun madam's mistakes. But similarly, I also think the reason Ishita is terrified at first of intimacy with Raman is because she got rejected at the last minute by Subbu. Her past too terrifies her that she could still be rejected again at any minute. Let's remember, she was engaged twice, before Raavan kumar came along. Raman himself mentions on a few occasions that she was a rejectee! Now after time slot change, and to add drama, Raman rants first, and then is not given enough time to explain his thought process, so it appears Raman isn't thinking at all. Similarly,  Ishita's constant need for reassurance that she is important to the family, and to Raman means she plays the self sacrificing martyr many many times. I think the idea that she will always feel inferior to Shagun, as she cannot be raman's first love should really be explored in more depth. I feel like even Raman doesn't recognise how difficult this is for  Ishita. I think if Raman found it hard to trust, Ishita may find it even harder. Her insecurity stemmed from something she can't change. Raman however did change. He transformed himself. I really think therefore, that Whilst yes after more than two years of marriage, Ishita should trust Raman, when it comes to Ruhi, she may never trust anyone else. Not even Raman. I actually think Ishita as a character will always find ultimate trust just as difficult as Raman does. But Ishita being the more level headed, calm and collected one, does not lash out at the drop of a hat because of this...unlike Raman


Omg I love your writing - please do continue to provide insight more as you can! Embarrassed

This is taking me back to the days we would have wonderful discussions about the depths of these characters and the intentionality of the scenes/dialogs.

I 100% agree that the biggest flaw since time slot change is Raman's emotions aren't given on screen build up or perspective and this happens to a lesser degree to Ishita too.  We viewers who connected to both characters initially can find the emotional nuances and thought processes b/c we've come to understand them.  So it just sucks that they don't show emotional justification of the leads on screen b/c if they did - we'd probably see much much less Ishita versus Raman!  

Both Ishita and Raman are at the core insecure that they are not worthy of keeping and holding onto love.  You described Raman's coping mechanism well in your original post, and you touch on Ishita's here - she overcompensates with caring and sacrificing to be accepted.  And honestly, I get both mechanisms b/c I personally have done similar things in a less melodramatic way! LOL

@bold - you aren't the only emotional fool here!  I mean despite being hella frustrated with this show for a while...I've still stuck around even through surrogacy track which just hurt a lot.  I'm doing the same thing your are though - either until Ruhi is saved or there is an ounce of positivity in the form of IshRa starting to may the journey back to each other...I'm just building on my bank of episodes!

Bahaha I love the "binge watching" culture!  That's how I used to watch most of my TV - American, British, or Indian until YHM came along!  What netflix shows do you watch?  

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 10:34am | IP Logged
Originally posted by -K.13-

Originally posted by Zoyamalik2005

Thank you all for such a warm welcome!!! I personally watched all of the online up to September, this year, and am currently building up a bank of episodes to catch up on. I'm an emotional fool and have declared a boycott on the show until Raman and Ishita at least begin to resolve the issues they face, and some much needed happiness returns to the show. 
I currently keep up with written updates. I live in England and the whole 'binge watching' Netflix culture I am now applying to this show. Until then therefore, I think I am going to make theses type of posts and maybe write some stories.


I feel like before the time slot change, there was more time given to why Raman and Ishita behaved they way they do. I actually do think Raman is incredibly volatile, and in all honesty Ishita bears the brunt of Shagun madam's mistakes. But similarly, I also think the reason Ishita is terrified at first of intimacy with Raman is because she got rejected at the last minute by Subbu. Her past too terrifies her that she could still be rejected again at any minute. Let's remember, she was engaged twice, before Raavan kumar came along. Raman himself mentions on a few occasions that she was a rejectee! Now after time slot change, and to add drama, Raman rants first, and then is not given enough time to explain his thought process, so it appears Raman isn't thinking at all. Similarly,  Ishita's constant need for reassurance that she is important to the family, and to Raman means she plays the self sacrificing martyr many many times. I think the idea that she will always feel inferior to Shagun, as she cannot be raman's first love should really be explored in more depth. I feel like even Raman doesn't recognise how difficult this is for  Ishita. I think if Raman found it hard to trust, Ishita may find it even harder. Her insecurity stemmed from something she can't change. Raman however did change. He transformed himself. I really think therefore, that Whilst yes after more than two years of marriage, Ishita should trust Raman, when it comes to Ruhi, she may never trust anyone else. Not even Raman. I actually think Ishita as a character will always find ultimate trust just as difficult as Raman does. But Ishita being the more level headed, calm and collected one, does not lash out at the drop of a hat because of this...unlike Raman


Omg I love your writing - please do continue to provide insight more as you can! Embarrassed

This is taking me back to the days we would have wonderful discussions about the depths of these characters and the intentionality of the scenes/dialogs.

I 100% agree that the biggest flaw since time slot change is Raman's emotions aren't given on screen build up or perspective and this happens to a lesser degree to Ishita too.  We viewers who connected to both characters initially can find the emotional nuances and thought processes b/c we've come to understand them.  So it just sucks that they don't show emotional justification of the leads on screen b/c if they did - we'd probably see much much less Ishita versus Raman!  

Both Ishita and Raman are at the core insecure that they are not worthy of keeping and holding onto love.  You described Raman's coping mechanism well in your original post, and you touch on Ishita's here - she overcompensates with caring and sacrificing to be accepted.  And honestly, I get both mechanisms b/c I personally have done similar things in a less melodramatic way! LOL

@bold - you aren't the only emotional fool here!  I mean despite being hella frustrated with this show for a while...I've still stuck around even through surrogacy track which just hurt a lot.  I'm doing the same thing your are though - either until Ruhi is saved or there is an ounce of positivity in the form of IshRa starting to may the journey back to each other...I'm just building on my bank of episodes!

Bahaha I love the "binge watching" culture!  That's how I used to watch most of my TV - American, British, or Indian until YHM came along!  What netflix shows do you watch?  


It is just the sheer brilliance of you and some others that drew me to this forum, and as the show has progressed I understand some people got a bit fed up and stopped posting. But as some one who only recently binge watched this show, I think the transition is-fresher in my mind, and I just cannot give up on Ishita and Raman. Some forum members like you inspired me to write this and honestly, I think I'm going to be positive about this show as long as I can connect to the fact that although not overt, Raman and ishita as characters in my mind do feel this way.


I am a massive daredevil fan on Netflix, as well as Jessica Jones. Love me some heroism !! I also have to catch up on suits as it wasn't available in uk for the longest time!

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 10:38am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Zoyamalik2005


It is just the sheer brilliance of you and some others that drew me to this forum, and as the show has progressed I understand some people got a bit fed up and stopped posting. But as some one who only recently binge watched this show, I think the transition is-fresher in my mind, and I just cannot give up on Ishita and Raman. Some forum members like you inspired me to write this and honestly, I think I'm going to be positive about this show as long as I can connect to the fact that although not overt, Raman and ishita as characters in my mind do feel this way.


I am a massive daredevil fan on Netflix, as well as Jessica Jones. Love me some heroism !! I also have to catch up on suits as it wasn't available in uk for the longest time!

Hhmm I've never heard of Jessica Jones!  I may have to look into it to watch during my former YHM time until things start to look a little more positive.  Pre-leap, even with the silly tracks - i stuck around b/c they kept the leads together for so long, and that was very unique to YHM.  Plus KP and DT are just such amazing actors that even if the script doesn't bring out the subtle emotions...their acting does and makes you feel do deeply! 

I know - I stalked the forum for months before posting and so many of my first IF friends have given up on YHM which is sad but totally understandable b/c the tone of the show is not what anyone originally signed up for.  But KP and DT combined with the Raman & Ishita I initially connected with manage to pull me in even when I don't want to be pulled in! LOL

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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 10:47am | IP Logged
This was lovely!!


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Posted: 24 April 2016 at 11:03am | IP Logged
Superb post
You desrcibed raman's character so well .
he has many flaws but still he rules in our hearts.

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