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Need Indian advices - relationship/sexuality (Page 2)

maha2us IF-Dazzler
maha2us
maha2us

Joined: 29 October 2007
Posts: 2936

Posted: 27 April 2016 at 7:08am | IP Logged
Lodi, What I understand is you are happy in this relationship and this has to be the key for you. The relationship will definitely blossom when both of you are committed in the relationship. The relationship rules are the same whether it is guy-girl relationship or it is a relationship between two persons of the same sex. The rules hold good for gays also. A relationship works when two persons focus on being more with each other, present to each other and available to each other. The relationship works when both the partners work on improving being more caring, compassionate, gentle, tender and understanding to each other which is what makes both the persons share love with each other. When there is a strong connection between two persons, it really makes for good relationship.

This is all universal rule and I now ask why you need Indian perspective in this case when your partner himself says he is not expecting the common persons in India take this relationship in a positive way. And that is the way in India. When both of you partners do explore a deep relationship which is a healthy one and when it is not going to be taken positively in the conservative society in India, better not tell about your relationship in India where most of the people don't look at this aspect positively. What I say is based on what I know.

qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
qwertyesque
qwertyesque

Joined: 03 December 2006
Posts: 6544

Posted: 27 April 2016 at 7:36pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by maha2us

Lodi, What I understand is you are happy in this relationship and this has to be the key for you. The relationship will definitely blossom when both of you are committed in the ... What I say is based on what I know.

not to appear condescending or anything... but since you said "know" rather than "believe" what is thit source of this knowledge...Smile


Edited by qwertyesque - 27 April 2016 at 7:41pm
maha2us IF-Dazzler
maha2us
maha2us

Joined: 29 October 2007
Posts: 2936

Posted: 27 April 2016 at 9:26pm | IP Logged
Qwerty, Knowing comes from my own direct and personal experience in my life. Belief comes from what I have learned from others.
QuietlyLoud IF-Dazzler
QuietlyLoud
QuietlyLoud

Joined: 20 February 2012
Posts: 2619

Posted: 28 April 2016 at 1:03am | IP Logged
Most Indians are not broadminded enough to accept a gay couple into their midst.You could probably find a few liberal ones here and there, but that's about it.So forget the idea of public acceptance.

Now the family, after some initial outbursts, may eventually make amendments for the sake of your friend's happiness.May be they would value his happiness more than their sense of being right.
Also, them being Christians is in your favor.Christians seem to be somewhat more tolerant of the customs accepted and practised in the West, as a result of religious influence.
Lodi Newbie
Lodi
Lodi

Joined: 23 April 2016
Posts: 6

Posted: 28 April 2016 at 6:05am | IP Logged
That's a very interesting reply. I did some research on Hinduism and Buddhism. And for thousands of years, neither really seem to have a problem with homsexuality. Various hindu-tempels also depict homoromantic love. Yet it is considered taboo nowadays. I always thought this taboo might be because of western influence. 
But Christianity in India might be more openminded that Hinduism/Buddhism nowadays? That's a bit sad. Hinduism and Buddhism seem to be a much more tolerant core than Christianity or Islam... but that's the religion itself of course, not the people.

These posts are helpful for me. Thank you all for taking the time to reply. I was born and raised in the Netherlands, so I don't know any better other than 'romance is romance', no matter if it's straight or gay. So if I see romance in Bollywood, I don't see 'romance', not 'straight romance'. It might have been naive of me to think that Indians would see it the same way. 
QuietlyLoud IF-Dazzler
QuietlyLoud
QuietlyLoud

Joined: 20 February 2012
Posts: 2619

Posted: 28 April 2016 at 8:11am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Lodi


But Christianity in India might be more openminded that Hinduism/Buddhism nowadays? That's a bit sad. Hinduism and Buddhism seem to be a much more tolerant core than Christianity or Islam... but that's the religion itself of course, not the people.

Not in that sense.What I meant is that,I find Indian Christians more tolerant of western culture and hence possibly of homosexuality as well, as it is accepted in many European countries.Not that they are more open-minded in general than an average Hindu, Muslim or Buddhist.

The West being the foundation of Christian faith, I believe a Christian living elsewhere would see a practice like gay marriage, which is unacceptable in their native culture, in a positive light than someone from another religion.




Edited by QuietlyLoud - 28 April 2016 at 8:55am
qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
qwertyesque
qwertyesque

Joined: 03 December 2006
Posts: 6544

Posted: 28 April 2016 at 8:16pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Lodi

That's a very interesting reply. I did some research on Hinduism and Buddhism. And for thousands of years, neither really seem to have a problem with homsexuality. Various hindu-tempels also depict homoromantic love. Yet it is considered taboo nowadays. I always thought this taboo might be because of western influence. 
But Christianity in India might be more openminded that Hinduism/Buddhism nowadays? That's a bit sad. Hinduism and Buddhism seem to be a much more tolerant core than Christianity or Islam... but that's the religion itself of course, not the people.

These posts are helpful for me. Thank you all for taking the time to reply. I was born and raised in the Netherlands, so I don't know any better other than 'romance is romance', no matter if it's straight or gay. So if I see romance in Bollywood, I don't see 'romance', not 'straight romance'. It might have been naive of me to think that Indians would see it the same way. 

can you describe romance.. so lets say that guys comes into your room.while your are alone - now. if you dont mind describe romance.. if you want i can tell you how my straight romance works.. but this is just out of curiosity... since a lot of iberty is taken in running down convention :)  I will not belittle whatever you say nor make any judgement call on that.. so just if you poetically describe romance in your world? 
qwertyesque IF-Rockerz
qwertyesque
qwertyesque

Joined: 03 December 2006
Posts: 6544

Posted: 28 April 2016 at 8:18pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by maha2us

Qwerty, Knowing comes from my own direct and personal experience in my life. Belief comes from what I have learned from others.

Knowing cant come from experience.. only speculations can...knowing requires learning and thinking.. not just experiencing...and here you are talking about somebody else's experiences I guess... (assuming you are not a guy)

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