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Darkness - A very dark OS (Page 2)

Karaali IF-Rockerz
Karaali
Karaali

Joined: 06 January 2011
Posts: 7394

Posted: 21 April 2016 at 11:03pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by oceanbubble

freaking out smiley
AAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAS THAT BALVINDER PANDEY...??

& the whole time I was thinking it was Dhruv... LOLLOLLOL


Well...coming to the story, it was a good piece of writing...considering the warning at the beginning, I was REALLY scared to the core to continue, but decided to test myself...& I passed this test...

I really enjoyed reading this piece, & that is a discovery for me...I never knew I could like something like this...I never really liked something like this...This has taken me by surprise as I only like happy endings, & I am a sucker for romance...!!

Maybe it was because you have indeed written it very well...& the last part was an absolute shocker...!

That Bauji would be the one to do THAT...to Bihaan...Now I have started doubting his intentions for bringing Bihaan home...LOLLOLLOL

Naah...that won't happen in the show for sure...so I can breathe...LOLLOL

A fine piece of writing Katori...Loved it...Clap

My pieces so far have been all over the place. I put the big warning up there to make sure the readers knew what they are getting into. Don't want any hate mail. LOLLOL

I am glad you liked it even though it isn't your style. As I say, a little suspense is needed in every story to keep it interesting.

If it wasn't a soap, possibilities were endless. Big smile

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oceanbubble

-Ila- IF-Sizzlerz
-Ila-
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Joined: 04 March 2015
Posts: 15816

Posted: 21 April 2016 at 11:29pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Katori

Originally posted by -Lachu-

That was... Unpleasant... didnt expect the culprit to be ... You know

But that doesnt mean the story is bad ... Yes it was bad in the sense of the plot being dark... But it was really good in the story pov.. I think u should write something like this more often... Heard of wattpad ..try posting there .. You will be surprised by the no. Of ppl who love this genre... Really write more often...not fan fics but original stories...I am sure you will be a star


Thanks! I write medical and technical manuals professionally, which my writing stiff and linear.

This is the first time I am dabbling in fiction. FF are easier as the characters are given. Once I can figure out a genre that works for me, I will try my hand at full-fledged fiction.

Thanks for reading and sorry for leaving a bad taste in your mouth.

I was going to write an epilogue with scenes from the show that justified the OS but then that would make it hard for the readers to watch the show and not think about the OS.



Stiff and linear is what works for this genre I guess... Do notify me when u write fiction next lol... Would really want to know... Oh it didn't disturb me much LOL I read equally grusome stuff on a regular basis... And I found the plot really at par with some I have read.

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Karaali

ShivSaan Senior Member
ShivSaan
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Joined: 13 December 2015
Posts: 756

Posted: 21 April 2016 at 11:56pm | IP Logged
You opened up a new world for me Katori. I never used to read any OS but after reading weepy woman I can't stop myself from opening up your OS.

Coming to this one I liked it from story telling POV. I guess I wasn't surprised when it turned out to be Bauji. I had him in mind from the beginning, which got confirmed with Vasus hatred. Correlating it with the show, this does explain why Vasu can accept Thapki but can't accept Bihaan even after seeing his goodness and love for her .

A very good piece of writing. Thanks .

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rtmsKaraali

SanyaEterna IF-Rockerz
SanyaEterna
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Posts: 9850

Posted: 22 April 2016 at 12:32am | IP Logged
Clap
That was amazing! Surprisingly, I loved it. But that doesn't mean I'm ready for moreLOL I'll happily stick to lovey-dovey-cliche ThaHaanWink but good thing DS wasn't the psycho. Bihaan dying because of DS is so undigestable for me. Bauji was unexpected but I accepted itLOL

Good work KatWink

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Karaali

Get-Lost IF-Sizzlerz
Get-Lost
Get-Lost

Crazy Creative Minion
Joined: 10 July 2008
Posts: 10869

Posted: 22 April 2016 at 2:17am | IP Logged
Umm..what should I say? I have read this kind of genre before so I didn't cringe..I you have read The Kite Runner, you would understand. You are right..there are all kinds of people in this world. 
Keep on writing..Thumbs Up

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Karaali

Kowsi IF-Rockerz
Kowsi
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Posted: 22 April 2016 at 2:51am | IP Logged
Katori I don't know what to say! The first part was so beautifully painful 
I just couldn't digest that killing and taking the head part... I am just not into this

But when you wrote about Bihaan's pain it was just too good.. I knew that it was Bauji ;)

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kapirirtmsKaraali

Karaali IF-Rockerz
Karaali
Karaali

Joined: 06 January 2011
Posts: 7394

Posted: 22 April 2016 at 3:31am | IP Logged
Originally posted by ShivSaan

You opened up a new world for me Katori. I never used to read any OS but after reading weepy woman I can't stop myself from opening up your OS.

Coming to this one I liked it from story telling POV. I guess I wasn't surprised when it turned out to be Bauji. I had him in mind from the beginning, which got confirmed with Vasus hatred. Correlating it with the show, this does explain why Vasu can accept Thapki but can't accept Bihaan even after seeing his goodness and love for her .

A very good piece of writing. Thanks .

Bingo! I wanted to be sure that it was not completely off the show. The violence was but Bihaan postion, lopsided loved from the 2 adopted parents coincides with the show. LOL
 
It could only be bauji! He had the power and position, a prerequisite for long-term abuse.

I am glad you liked he piece.
Karaali IF-Rockerz
Karaali
Karaali

Joined: 06 January 2011
Posts: 7394

Posted: 22 April 2016 at 3:33am | IP Logged
Originally posted by SanyaEterna

Clap
That was amazing! Surprisingly, I loved it. But that doesn't mean I'm ready for moreLOL I'll happily stick to lovey-dovey-cliche ThaHaanWink but good thing DS wasn't the psycho. Bihaan dying because of DS is so undigestable for me. Bauji was unexpected but I accepted itLOL

Good work KatWink

Don't worry! I am not planning more pieces like this. Just experimenting with genres.LOLLOL

Glad you liked it.

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