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ArHi: Innocence to a half-mad city [Complete] (Page 12)

meera30 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 06 January 2010
Posts: 5068

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 1:22pm | IP Logged
In another life, I would have been asking you to marry me after reading this chapter.

There is a sense of - melancholy is too feeble a word but will have to do given my limited vocabulary - that comes through in your writing. I am choked. And no PMS to blame. This is the pure wonder of your writing. You make watch-making sound sexy, threesomes wistfully romantic and being Black Sheep the only real way to live. 

Your ability to string words into a tale is a talent that should be dusted with silk and threaded with gold before safely wrapping in crinkling tissue and sealing in a Christmas ornament. 

PS: A little bit more greentea than rockbarbie this

PPS: I am officially a fangirl now. 

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pinkly Goldie

Joined: 07 August 2006
Posts: 2227

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 2:04pm | IP Logged
Let me start from the bottom. The clock Khushi is making sounds amazing. Looks like some big tragedy has happened in Khushi's life.

I love arnav, Aman and lavanya's friendship. I am little confused about aman. Does he have feelings for arnav? Is he gay? And lavanya knows about it?

I did not understand what arnav was cribbing about (his monologue). Too many complicated words for me.

Anjali is unnecessarily poking arnav to say mean things. Would wait to know why brother-sister relationship is do stressful.

Waiting for arnav to come to watching and meet khushi again for the grandfather clock.

Nice chapter. Liked it. Continue soon.

Edited by pinkly - 08 May 2016 at 2:04pm

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Kishmish IF-Rockerz

Joined: 08 February 2012
Posts: 5497

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 2:42pm | IP Logged
"Watching and making a Watch" ... Khushi seems like a genius ... 
The Solar System on your wrist ... Wow ... What a brilliant piece of work that watch is ... 

There's something awfully wrong between Anjali and Arnav ... I wonder what ... 

Love the threesome ... at least they are there for each other in these trying times ... 
Payal seems overprotective of Khushi but maybe she needs that overprotective eye on her ... 

Thank you KB ... 

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avchowdhury IF-Dazzler

Joined: 03 April 2012
Posts: 2528

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 3:57pm | IP Logged
Awesome story

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kizh72 Goldie

Joined: 04 June 2013
Posts: 1693

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 4:40pm | IP Logged
Bloody brilliant! Especially that bit on "why blacksheep". 
Is there a black sheep in all of us?

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N0306 IF-Dazzler

Joined: 10 November 2011
Posts: 4062

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 5:34pm | IP Logged
Oh my god.. this was mind blowing update.. the story of three friends but weirdly inter-wound.. combinations of emotions, feelings, personalities...

then  there is khushi and payal.. another story waiting to unfold.. love it..

the watch is amazing.. i wouldn't wear it because i need to see the time too ;) unless i missed it in when i saw the video.. but it is surreal to be able to see the planets movements.. if i could own it.. it would be one of my proud possession and a permanent roommate.

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Mrieshka Senior Member

Joined: 08 May 2013
Posts: 406

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 9:03pm | IP Logged
Thanks for the pm. Two word comes to mind first--melancholy and mystery. Looks like Arnav and Anjali have a terrible past and same way Khushi also had rough past. Payal and Khushi both sisters, lost parents, struggling to survive may be and although Khushi is genius but could not graduate. I am getting more and more intrigued by this story. Loved the friendship between those three.. Will wait for story to unfold . 

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vgedin IF-Dazzler

Joined: 26 August 2012
Posts: 4772

Posted: 08 May 2016 at 9:32pm | IP Logged
Unres on Pg. 11

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