SwaSan SS: Sweet Deals (Completed) (Page 8)

iam_aheli_98 Goldie

Joined: 29 August 2015
Posts: 2104

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 7:27am | IP Logged
Hi Nyna.Smile
Again read this SS with my this account.LOL
Very beautiful starting dear. Very interesting and different backdrop. Really loved it.Embarrassed
I thing, who was that gentleman? Was that Sanskar?Confused
Plzz continue with the next parts soon. Eagerly waiting for the next updates. And plzz send me pm when u update the next parts.Embarrassed
With love.

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lucky.m IF-Rockerz

Joined: 27 May 2011
Posts: 8508

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 11:48am | IP Logged
un res pg 5Tongue

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tootiefrootie11 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 15 January 2010
Posts: 9213

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 12:20pm | IP Logged
Unres Page 3 Nyna dear xoxo 

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raaz19 Goldie

Joined: 17 January 2015
Posts: 1942

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 4:49pm | IP Logged
Hi nyna...Firstly so sorry for the late reply and thank you for the pm...Embarrassed
What a scrumptious and delicious treat of a ss you have delivered...as I sit in front of the window watching the tiny rain trops I cannot stop but smile at the tasty start of the ss...The recipe of this ss has the perfect blend of soul...love ...drama and care...All the emotions one needs to feel both content and blissfull...I see that this journey is indeed going to be sweet and if somewhat spicy Wink if you get what I mean...The blend of ingredients is just perfect Clap...

Okay back to chapter one...I have to say I just loved the small details you used to describe this cute coffee place and Mrs das has become one of my favourite characters already...just love her...LOL she is so sweet...

The bond between swara and ragani is very sweet and the house just sounds so cute...A perfect family home built upon trust and faith that with time  is shall get better...just like your story it did make me wonder why did they leave home...so what is the mystery Disapprove

Mm..well back to the bakery...buddy seems you were planning on making us all feel hungry with all those muffins...I felt like I was at the counter and actually ordering one of those...Day Dreaming

Seems like our swara is one mean baker herself...back to the stranger that everyone is wondering whom it is...seems like you have the perfect blend of soul and care sorted in this mystery man.. I have to say I just loved his shuttle entry in the shop to his mischievous order of the coffee to his silent observations of swara actions...I just couldn't help image that I was sanskaar...His nature in the start I the show was to always watch swara with so much love and integrity to decipher what she is up to...seems like our gent is already hooked with this beauty...Hug

Well the real question for me is what does recipe have in store next...Blushing

For this first encounter with the stranger has  made swara learn one lesson which is to smile...wonder what you have in store next from us...Please update soon...Tongue

Until then I shall reread this mouth watering piece LOL

Ps: don't be nervous it has been written beautifully Star

Take care...


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krishuuuuuuuuuu Goldie

Joined: 27 August 2010
Posts: 1818

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 5:57pm | IP Logged
Hey nyna...
 Im late ..sorry n thanks for pm...

I must say im sooo very impressed...introduction to sweet deals was literally sweet...all that cupcakes n coffee u mentioned made my stomach growl...hundred rats were running in my stomach...yummy...such a delicious start...

The whole chapter n little background of swaragini described was amazing..loved their sisterly bond...mrs Das seems to be a nice women..who helped these girls in trouble times...house cum bakery was beautifully described...

Sooo swara is a expert baker...great going n then comes the entry of a mysterious stranger..(.im guessing sansku)stupid me..who else it could be then...loved the situation..rain n one cup of coffee...prepared by her for him...awww im all smiling..he quitely observed her n left..leaving a note...wow...

Sooo story is getting all spiced up...excited...

Overall it was magnificent update...waiting for next...


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soapbubble IF-Rockerz

Joined: 15 October 2005
Posts: 5283

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 8:50pm | IP Logged
So beautifully written, Nyna!!

I loved loved the charming recipe for your story! 
And your setting - so lovingly delineated - reminds me of Nora Roberts.

And it's an intriguing start! The young man leaves a note (a shadow of Pakeezah there! Day Dreaming) and our Swara's interest is piqued. I confess, so is mine!!

Sorry for turning up so late to read but I loved it.

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Nynaeve IF-Dazzler

Joined: 06 November 2015
Posts: 4309

Posted: 24 April 2016 at 9:06pm | IP Logged
 @ Bubble, Lucky, Razia, Shru & Talia,
What a lovely way to greet a Monday morning - reading all your lovely comments. They make me so gladSmile
I will get back to each one of you even if it means sneaking time of work.

Love you girls,

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Nynaeve IF-Dazzler

Joined: 06 November 2015
Posts: 4309

Posted: 25 April 2016 at 6:29am | IP Logged
Originally posted by tootiefrootie11

Res Nyna! Sorry if it takes me a while to unres but I am so super excited about this, had to res:) X

Nyna Hug

With many apologies for the delay Embarrassed. Firstly, a sweet treat for us titled Sweet Deals- yummy! I LOVE the baking theme! Redolent of coffee and cinnamon and chocolate - some of my favourite things too, as I said above, that with the combination of a writer like you writing, was super exciting. The Recipe was superb- Clap, loved the humour and word play and you need have no trepidation there at all Big smile

I really liked the intro. The idea of a responsible Swara and a Ragini that sleeps later than her is rather refreshing and the little touches of Dragon Das, Swara's reaction to the song and even the mouth watering list of cupcakes to be made all sets such a nice tone! Then we have the intriguing hint of some past tragedy/ actions having them placed here in somewhat strained circumstances, totally estranged from a conservative but still steady family life. We see a responsible and highly selfless Swara but its clear even now that with care taken to build this in, that element will really make sense in the overall story and not leave us with a heroine who makes you despair many times Wink

Also, nice little description of the bakery and its situation and hours and even the living arrangements- as you know, I am a fan of little details that build an overall big picture Smile

Then we have the first meeting! I really liked the way this felt exciting and somewhat romantic despite the prima facie mundaneness of a stranger simply coming in for coffee at a bakery/ coffee shop. Btw- I have an obsession with coffee shops. I can sit in one for hours, and often do so. Especially when I lived by myself I had a lovely area near me and I endlessly haunted their coffee shops to drink hot chocolate there and people watch and read/ write Big smile

So whilst the shop is to be closed, it wasn't so due to an error (I had wondered there if the stranger had flipped the sign himself Wink but he's too much a gent for that as we see later) and Swara covers her initial mild irrigation to make up with a nice smile which clearly ensnares the man, not that she knows. She makes a "mean" cup of coffee and then he sits down to enjoy that but more so than that, is enjoying observing her. Unknown to him, his smile has already affected her too! And then Swara is so absorbed she even misses his exit. Subtle but still gave such a nice sense of "feels" already. But the stranger has left a sweet note that cannot help but thaw Swara's mercurial temper and as the hours pass she views it with much more mellow feeling! 

I really enjoyed this Nyna and am so eager to read Chapter 2! I am glad you took the precaution and reserved more posts than you intend to write- I won't be complaining if we get more Wink

Loads of love,
Shru xoxo

Dear Shru,

Firstly no apologies - I am sure you have quite a bit on your plate (office presentations and a demanding work schedule) and catering to our obsession with DK - the fact that you have taken time out itself to read, res and comment is more than sufficient. And that you liked the recipe - thank you. Trepidation - well,just cannot help but feel a little.Ermm

Swara and Ragini - yes, the deviation from the show's characterisation was intentional (not to say that Swara was irresponsible but she was quite a carefree girl in the show). And the hint of a past tragedy / actions - that is worrying me a little. As I mentioned in another response, I am just hoping that when I finally do reveal the same, I am not met with blank responses and a couple of chapters later, I have you saying, "that was the reason?????" Confused- it would be like a cake that does not rise (and in the baking world there can be nothing more tragic than a flat cakeCryCry)

And really glad to know you liked the description of the shop - to confess I had actually drawn a rough outline in an excel worksheet and then simply described the diagram (I was stuck as to how to describe the setting and the drawing helped, as it seems).

Ahh ! coffees shops - nothing like spending time in them, though in India they tend to be pretty crowded and actually do not allow much time for a quiet cup of coffee, but coffee and conversations - nothing like that to pass the time of the daySmile

No, she forgot to flip the board - he was too much of gentleman to take any undue advantage. And true, his note has a quite an impact on her.

And once again, please no apologies for delayed unres. As I said, you reading my story telling attempts is more than enough.

loads of love,

PS: @ bold above, that line has the ''creative me' (who tends to be slightly delusional as to her talents at times, is doing a 'red indian dance' somewhere in the corner of my mindEmbarrassed

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