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Software Symphony 65 "Playthings" (Page 34)

moonwearer IF-Dazzler

Joined: 27 August 2014
Posts: 3886

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 12:22am | IP Logged

Uneasy lies the head that is witness to such pain...Celebrate Childhood nurture thinkers and dreamers who have the conviction to follow their dreams...
RIP to those referred by Dr Surpur...That time when folks throng to Kota and results drive children to desperation...

Dr. Ravi Kumar Surpur, IAS, is currently the District Collector of Kota, Rajasthan. Kota, as everyone knows, has become the nerve center of IIT coaching in India.
Dr. Ravi has written an open letter to all parents of young children in India. The letter is widely available on various news websites.

I consider myself a very unfortunate person because I got a chance to read around 20-25 Suicide Notes of young, brilliant, beautiful and wonderful children.
Am I giving so many adjectives to such children just because they committed suicide?
I am sorry... The answer is No... They were in fact young, brilliant, beautiful and wonderful children.
A girl with an amazing command over English language in her suicide note (grammatically perfect 5-page Suicide Note with beautiful running handwriting) thanks her mother for giving up her career for raising the children... Subtle hint that she was pricked on this matter again and again... Another girl wants her grandmother to become her mother in her next birth... Another requests her parents to allow her younger sister to do what she likes and not what they like... One tells candidly that he was manipulated to study Science which was not his taste... Many simply write in fewer lines that they could not fulfil the expectations of their parents... Rather few say they were not really capable of doing what is being asked of them...
All of them thought that Death was a much peaceful and effortless action than going through this dilemma of artificially doing what parents want them to do...
As they say, "Tip of the iceberg reveals little and hides mountains within." Similarly, apparent Suicide Cases reflect small numbers but the reality is all those children who did not opt to take this extreme step but certainly are going through stress/worry/anxiety due to pressure on performance.
Many parents cannot believe after the disaster that it was their own child who took such a drastic measure and I don't mean to hurt their sentiments any further but the reality is that the child was mentally looking for some blade of grass which a drowning man searches for... That blade of grass could have been your simple appreciation of his efforts... your solacing words of comfort of asking him to do his best and forget the results... your absolute unconditioned appreciation of his extraordinariness...
Instead, what the child got was threats of performing still better... psychological manipulation by repeat and re-telecasting of the hardships you have gone through for the sake of family... comparison with better performers (neighbors, relatives, children of colleague, ancestors...could be anyone)... sharing imagination on the loss/notional gain of social status being dependent on child's performance.
I need to take a pause here since I hear many of you saying that kids do not like many things which are good for them...
Well let us try to see what all good things they resisted... Eating right, sleeping right, talking right, behaving right, seeing right, listening right, reading right etc.
Child actually observes parents and never follows anything blindly...
Moreover, there is one thing which is certain... Child analyses and looks at the parents to see whether any of those things preached are followed by parents to begin with, and if so... Whether their parents are really loving, joyful, peaceful, and happy by doing so...
They tend to pick up only those habits of their parents that make the parents happy and peaceful...
In case you have seriously messed up situations, your child may even not like you...
It may appear strange and extremely annoying... But there is a possibility of your child not liking you... This comes in many forms and shades... Absolute dislike, not liking few traits of yours, not liking you by comparing you with someone better, not liking you for your over-protective care and concern which you may think as love but is suffocating for the child, not liking you for your double standards, etc.
So, is it the objective of this letter to make you realise that your child dislikes you?
Answer again is a big No... Your child does not dislike you... I am just making a point that unconsciously we may have created such a situation, which we need to undo...
Parents really think good for their children's future, but the point I need to make is that your dreams are always limited to your experience of what is good... what is successful... what is the best thing... Well, the truth is your child may surpass your imagination and reach places which you never even dreamed of...
Creating the right kind of atmosphere for the child to grow and flower in the home by making home a really happy, loving and peaceful place to live.
Understanding the needs of the children... There are two extremes in this case... Making the child go through terrible hardships to realize "your" dreams is one extreme, and the other extreme is over-pampered care... Both of them definitely do not work...
Take time to switch from "teaching mode" to "learning mode" from the child. Children will show you the way to be really happy and peaceful at times...Instead of learning from them, we tend to always assume the role of teacher / preacher.
We certainly are not the benchmark for the child. Many a times, we may be regressive, rudimentary types in comparison to the ability of the child.
Just a final thought. Are you interested in making the child realize "Your Dreams" at any cost, or should it be like creating such situations that the child rea[truncated by WhatsApp]

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Edited by moonwearer - 20 May 2016 at 4:22am

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bhartirochani Newbie

Joined: 11 May 2014
Posts: 11

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 6:35am | IP Logged
Hi nisha 
 Great update of sosy  but I think II need a reallty check 
She thinks dude doesn't like appa but here appa also doesn't like dude  

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Errantnomad IF-Dazzler

Joined: 17 March 2015
Posts: 3812

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 6:55am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Kjolovesbabies

Haaa let the blood shed begin Wink Tongue Big smile

Mind wars, full blow kunfu karate, choke slam and what not nivi is gorge and II is ummm... And Shree you are toast.

I still remember him saying to rnb I'm Sreekanth and Sree to her LOL

Ha ha kungfu, karate , grand choke slam or MORTAL COMBAT.

Yep Daddy's angel has asked Nivi's Daddu who happens to be his as is needed basis Admin POLITELY to put his angel to bed Big smile to give his sole focus to the MORTAL KOMBAT AT SUB ZERO TEMPERSTURES.

Hey guys there's a Mortal KOMBAT animation series , the first two of the video games has where this character sub-zero is pitched in a ICY battle with scorpion, his nemisis .

Sree the nemisis , R&B the sub-zero and II the Ice Klone. Big smile

Koi Munira ko SOS bhejo yaar Embarrassed

Good day and good evening all.

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modernfamily Goldie

Joined: 20 February 2014
Posts: 1046

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 7:01am | IP Logged
Thanks Nisha for bringing back shree. Now R&b needs to prove that he's a nurturerer.

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moonwearer IF-Dazzler

Joined: 27 August 2014
Posts: 3886

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 7:03am | IP Logged
Kalpana Ice Klone has to thaw and melt by her Sub Zero beside her is what the Advocate is stating as her brief. Is it going to be a sizzling chocolate brownie or a Sizzling steak Nisha dishes out for our dinner date?

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moonwearer IF-Dazzler

Joined: 27 August 2014
Posts: 3886

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 7:07am | IP Logged
Wonder what will happen if Subbu Neeraja and Subbu's mom meet them after one of the Kutcheris and go gagaga over Nivi...hoping she falls for their baby...but Gregor will break their hearts some day ...
The two familes should meet after every kid(s) arrive.

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Errantnomad IF-Dazzler

Joined: 17 March 2015
Posts: 3812

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 7:09am | IP Logged
Originally posted by jasminechick

<font color="#0000FF">Nisha, Shev, Anu, Kalpana, RedGarnet, Kavitha, Kala and my dear folks in Western World</font>. Here is a link to quench your thirst of Thattai and Mysore Pak ! Enjoy !

<font color="#FF0000">P.S.</font> <font color="#CC0033">I dont have any connection to the website/owner. Oru chinna samuga sevaiLOLLOL
Google search result for Sri Krishna Mysore Pak </font>Wink

Good morning Jas! I hv the physical forms of it now
Proudly peethifying that Cos I'm in posession of Grand sweets , 1 pkt thattai , 1 pkt of Ribbon pakkoda, 1 small pk of badam katli and 1 pkt of Krishna sweets Mysore pak Embarrassed .It will be over this wkend though. My friend's mom ( the friend who lost her brother few months bk) got it for me. I'm her daughter too.

Samuga sevai greatly appreciated. Smile

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Errantnomad IF-Dazzler

Joined: 17 March 2015
Posts: 3812

Posted: 20 May 2016 at 7:18am | IP Logged
Originally posted by moonwearer

<font size="3">Shilpa i understand you are busy with the move...but i guess we should make some time to meet before you leave for California...We are still just 2 kms away and have been planning for over a year to meet.</font>

Shilpa, just thought you might want to get some annual check ups done for yourself before you leave India, that is in case you have not done it yet.

By the time you guys make sense of the insurance insurance , medical providers , identifying the FP and all that stuff, it could take a while. And Appts with Drs is, I can write realms on the irritation. Sorry this is not to put you off , but a pesky detail we have to endure.
A forewarning, I know it's a headache but will be good if you can bite the bullet and get rid of it as one of the things to do.

Sri, if shilpa hasn't done it yet, knock on her head please.

I got that away from my to do list just this wk. I was sitting twiddling my thumbs for the mammo a good 1 wk, hoping that no news is good news. cleared it yday. Some of the blabberings I did here was in effect nervous tension.

Edited by Errantnomad - 20 May 2016 at 7:22am

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